Diego Valdez Customer Service Representative |
5 people marked this as a favorite. |
Really, Cosmo?
Really. When I moved here Cosmo convinced me to give him a ride home into Seattle. At rush hour. I didn't know better. I take solace in believing that being in a car with a country driver trying to navigate 5 lanes of rush hour traffic, and the near death incidents that go along with that, was as nightmarish for him as it was for me. I blame Cosmo for that 15 mile, 2 hour trip.
NobodysHome |
4 people marked this as a favorite. |
Uncle Teddy wrote:Really, Cosmo?Really. When I moved here Cosmo convinced me to give him a ride home into Seattle. At rush hour. I didn't know better. I take solace in believing that being in a car with a country driver trying to navigate 5 lanes of rush hour traffic, and the near death incidents that go along with that, was as nightmarish for him as it was for me. I blame Cosmo for that 15 mile, 2 hour trip.
I'm a California driver. Most people point at us when they want to cite "crazy aggressive drivers with no concept of lane precedence." I've driven all over the country, including Boston, Chicago, Tampa, Dallas, and Houston and never been proven wrong (i.e., more timid than the locals).
EXCEPT in Seattle.
THOSE drivers are truly bat-spit crazy!
Liz Courts Community Manager |
4 people marked this as a favorite. |
This song has been stuck in my head all week, and it's a thousand percent Cosmo's fault.
Ambrosia Slaad |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |
This song has been stuck in my head all week, and it's a thousand percent Cosmo's fault.
I blame Cosmo that I'm fully aware of my susceptibility to earworms... and yet I'm still wanting to click that link. (ಠ_ಠ)
Rysky |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Liz Courts wrote:This song has been stuck in my head all week, and it's a thousand percent Cosmo's fault.I blame Cosmo that I'm fully aware of my susceptibility to earworms... and yet I'm still wanting to click that link. (ಠ_ಠ)
Oh Oh Oh click this one!
Ambrosia Slaad |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:Oh Oh Oh click this one!Liz Courts wrote:This song has been stuck in my head all week, and it's a thousand percent Cosmo's fault.I blame Cosmo that I'm fully aware of my susceptibility to earworms... and yet I'm still wanting to click that link. (ಠ_ಠ)
Nooooooooooo!
Limeylongears |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Q: Does 'Chuck Chick and Jack Tingle' sound like:
A) Two 1970s C&W singers, possibly with combovers, wearing ruffled shirts and purple nylon velour suits
B) The world's worst comedy stage magician duo
C) The world's best comedy stage magician duo
D) The hosts of a long-running infomercial series advertising rhinestone-encrusted kitchen accessories
E) All of the above
Cosmo Sales Associate |
Limeylongears |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |
I Blame Cosmo for a) dropping a lump of bright red goulash on my crotch while eating and reading at the same time, which gave me a choice between b) washing it off, in which case I'd look as if I'd lost control of my bladder, and c), leaving it, in which case it'd look as if something was horribly, horribly wrong in that particular area.
I also Blame Him for my sense of shock and betrayal when the "smoked" "pork" "sausage" I bought for £1 in Poundland turned out not to be very nice to eat.
Uncle Teddy |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Yesterday I discovered upon arriving home that the city decided that not only would they prevent me from parking in my apartment parking lot they would park half of the (censored) vehicles involved in the construction, including trailers for hauling oversized loads and a steamroller, up and down the street in front of my building.
Curse you, Cosmo, and your slightly more evil twin!
Set |
4 people marked this as a favorite. |
I Blame Cosmo for having to get out of my apartment because of a fire alarm for the third time this year...after never having to do so for the last six years prior. Why?!?!?
One of the places I lived, thunderstorms would set off the fire alarms, and we'd have to leave the building because they were so darned loud.
One of the thunderstorms, lightning struck the wet parking lot, and electricity travelled through the rainwater to zap me, leaning on the metal railing outside.
So, yeah, thanks to a fire alarm, I got zapped by lightning.
Thanks Cosmo!
Set |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |
I also blame Cosmo that Set was wrongfully denied being killed alive by lightning.
I know, right? Everyone else has to settle for stuff like car accidents or 'got old' or 'I drank so much my liver caught on fire,' I could've gone out with a bang!
I was holding a metal railing in a thunderstorm. I've raised tigers. I ate my mom's cooking. What more do I have to do to win that prized Darwin Award?
Pillbug Toenibbler |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |
I blame Cosmo that my mom didn't believe my coffee headache theory.
I blame² Cosmo that to prove me wrong, she brewed a batch this morning.
I blame³ Cosmo that it also gave her a headache. (Seems to have no effect on dad.)
I blame^4 Cosmo that even though I warned her beforehand, she seems mildly grudge-y at me about getting a headache.
Uncle Teddy wrote:{offers mug} Coffee? >:)So the construction that's been happening outside my apartment was supposed to have wrapped up Friday.... And with all the other construction going on in my city travel is a headache inducer.
Really, Cosmo?
As a follow-up... was over at the parents this morning. I reached for the coffee carafe to pour a cup and Mom stopped me. Apparently she is determined to use up the bag of headache-y coffee (I forgot I left it with her) and is still brewing her way through it.
Me: "Why are you still drinking this?! Just throw it in the compost pile."
Mom: "It's perfectly good coffee."
Me: "It gives you headaches!"
Mom: "It's still good coffee."
(I had Folgers instant coffee instead when I got back to the apt.)
---
I blame Cosmo that parents are so stubborn at their age.
Uncle Teddy |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Ugh. Construction still going on and looks like it won't be done for a few more weeks. Oh, and school starts next week and there are two schools half a mile down the road so the city is going to open the east-west traffic to one lane and will allow southbound traffic but not northbound traffic. So starting next week I'll have to deal with the annual school-year traffic (school buses, parents dropping their kids off at school and act like they own the road, and teenagers driving to school) which is a pain normally and is now going to be 100 times worse.
There is only one word, one name, to describe this situation and we all know what that name is.
Cosmo!
Cosmo's Slightly More Evil Twin Malaise-Inducement Construct |
NobodysHome |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Our neighbor across the street was already running an (obviously-unlicensed) business, with strange men loitering in their idling cars outside her house on an almost-daily basis. (I think she's a "real" massage therapist, so she's not that kind of illegal business. But her clientele did seem to consist entirely of seedy-looking guys who liked to smoke while idling their cars.)
Now our "real" neighbor seems to be running an illegal bed & breakfast out of her (rental) home, with 2-3 strange cars in front of our house and hers every night (and those cars always rotating).
Cosmo, how many illegal businesses are you going to put on my street before I have to rat out a bunch of otherwise-nice people because their businesses are interfering with my ability to park anywhere near my house?!?!?
Tels |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I blame Cosmo for the company my Cousin works for going bankrupt and laying him off. Now he's never going to be able to pay me back in time for the plane ticket I bought him after he got stranded up here in Alaska after his brother's wedding. I'm traveling to New Zealand for my own sisters wedding at the end of the month and there is no way he's going to be able to land a new job and pay off the debt he's inevitably going to accrue while looking for a new job, and then pay me back before I leave.
Ambrosia Slaad |
4 people marked this as a favorite. |
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:I blame Cosmo that I just found out I accidentally forgot something behind the last time I house- & pet-sat. Something, incredibly embarrassing.What was it?
Oh wait...it is incredibly embarrassing...so I doubt you would share that information.
I Blames Cosmo for asking.
>_>
<_<I feel horrible. It's been a couple weeks since I was there, and I didn't even realize it was missing. And then, today, I get a very polite email...
Rysky |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
John Kretzer wrote:Ambrosia Slaad wrote:I blame Cosmo that I just found out I accidentally forgot something behind the last time I house- & pet-sat. Something, incredibly embarrassing.What was it?
Oh wait...it is incredibly embarrassing...so I doubt you would share that information.
I Blames Cosmo for asking.
>_>
<_<** spoiler omitted **
O.O
*offers hugs*
Tacticslion |
I'm guessing Tamagotchi.
But regardless, I also offer hugs and general reassurances that all is well.
Also the assurance that, if you ever house-sit for us, you can be sure that whatever you happen to leave behind will likely never be found again. Ever.
(And I may well not be exaggerating for effect.)