False factoids


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KahnyaGnorc is that JYA-AC


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Raven Moon's proudest boast is that he is fully air-conditioned. He gets very annoyed if it is pointed out that everybody else has nostrils too.


Pulg has a third nostril for extra ventilation.


Ventnor prefers his heating system to Pulg's AC.


KahnyaGnorc is the original inventor of central heating and central air. Unfortunately, their blueprints were stolen by halflings disguised as lawn gnomes and sold to a cabal of eleven Elven Elvis impersonators.


While Uncle Teddy was blissfully unaware of the theft, his ursine friend was actually involved, allowing his den to be used as a waypoint to deliver the ill-gotten goods to those evil Elvish Impersonators.


KahnyaGnorc's true colors are blue and yellowish pink.


Quiche Lisp is actually more of a Cheesecake Lisp.


KahnyaGnorc will shortly be releasing a Christmas album in collaboration with Miley Cyrus and a choir of parsnips.

Scarab Sages

Pulg can use his face as a kitchen sponge.


IHIYC hides in closets, presents are in closets prior to being put under the tree . . . coincidence? I think not! IHIYC = Santa!


KahnyaGnorc is Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer's understudy.


Ventnor is also known as Rudolovredaaruunodmaax The Red-Scaled RuinDrake.


Pulg is a bad banana with a... greasy black peeeeeeel!


GoatToucher once killed a man, armed only with a banana.


KahynaGnorc was the banana.

Scarab Sages

Ventnor once French-kissed a walrus.


IHIYC spends his waking hours wondering what a g'goob g'joob is, and how he can persuade his significant other to give him one once he's worked it out.


Pulg is the walrus (coo coo ca-choo)


KahnyaGnorc is the Plumber. (What? You thought I was going to say Carpenter?)


Uncle Teddy is not ONLY a plumber, but he taught his nephews Mario and Luigi everything they know about plumbing and princesses.


KG knows all about plumbing, but STILL doesn't know about princesses.

Scarab Sages

Sissyl eats brass tacks and shits zircon.


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IHIYC is also known as the Trombonenator, a super futuristic warrior whose shattered limbs were replaced with prosthetic trombones in a super futuristic top-secret military experiment, thus making him utterly useless in combat.


Pulg was invited to help research Trombonenator Tech but thought it was too silly. Obviously, Tubanator Tech is where it is at.


KG wrote an autobiography titled Codename: French Horn.

Just don't ask where the hand went.


GT, finding life as an orchestral French Horn player rather tame, has used his left hand technique to achieve considerable success in the field of alternative online-only video entertainment for gentlemen who enjoy the intimate attentions of other gentlemen.

Scarab Sages

When down on his luck back in 2002, Pulg worked a brief stint in an arcade as a Whack-A-Mole.


I'm Hiding In Your Closet is secretly hiding in your bathtub instead.


andygal conquered the Moon for the Spanish crown in 1508.


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Ventnor worked for the Spanish Crown. Once he earned it, he added the crown to his hoard.


KahnyaGnorc worked for the Spanish Archer.


Pulg has recently been hired by Sterling Archer to replace his missing butler.


Fred failed out of Butlering College after 3 semesters. He took a year to find himself before applying to Bear School.


Ventnor is not a natural red dragon, he dies his scales, he actually a blue dragon.


Raven Moon was named after a particularly rude bird that pestered their parents.

Scarab Sages

KahnyaGnorc's head rotates with the trajectory of the sun like a sunflower.

Note I said her head, not necessarily her face.


IHIYC is actually The Shocker, world-famous Spiderman villain and probably in the movie news.

Sovereign Court

Sissyl has returned to you...and I am anxious her career should progress. In the new production of "Il Muto," you shall therefore cast Pulg as the Pageboy, and put Ms. Sissyl in the role of Countess....


The Phantom of the Opera is there.

Right there. :points:

Sovereign Court

...and our Don Juan must lose some weight, it's not healthy in a man of GoatToucher's age....


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The Phantom of the Opera is neither a phantom nor associated with the Opera. He's actually a haunt at an abandoned Chuck-e-Cheese's.


Uncle Teddy isn't actually an uncle. It should be second cousin twice removed Teddy


Cuàn hangs flip flops on his horns to ward off evil spirits.


Ventnor wrote a super musical called the Ham-tomb of the Oporka, as he felt that the original suffered from a noticeable lack of pig-based foodstuffs.


Pulg is a preemptive reincarnation of a 24th Century poet and philosopher.


KahnyaGnorc was the lead in Ventnor's musical. Their voice was so beautiful even the Sirens were moved to tears.

Scarab Sages

Uncle Teddy's left eye is a tiny working fusion reactor that shines like a distant star. His right eye is a carton of milk.


I'm Hiding In Your Closet doesn't own pants because he thinks they're a passing fad.


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Ventnor, having perfected the spell Mass Remove Pants, is presently lurking smugly (or Smaugly) in his lair, sitting atop a vast pile of plundered trousers.

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