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First One to post win thread


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I won !

Hmmm... you had to be there, I guess.

Go there and look at the post preceding the post you just arrived at.


I'm the FIRST LOSER!!!


By the Gods ! What are you doing here ?

This thread musn't be left open.

Or something terrible will happen (but the Hells if I know what. I'm just an orientalish gnome from an AP in a region of Golarion I never even played in).

I AM A BIGGEST LOSER THAN YOU, DJ-BOGIE !

Cheliax

I've seen one near-apocalypse already. Think I can take another. Where's my crowbar?


Crowbars are for freemen. Gravity Guns are for bad***es.

Cheliax

Ain't my fault the angel gets a freakin' flaming sword and I got jack. Turning into a snake isn't gonna do squat in this situation. I gotta work with what I can get.


I don't think we are thinking about the same thing...
Which is why you turn into something better than a snake: A mother-chucking red dragon! Or gold. Flame swords got nothing on them.

Cheliax

I know what you're talking about, but Crowley's never played a video game ;)

... yeah I can't do that. I'm just a regular run-of-the-mill demonic instigator. General minor temptations, that kind of thing. I did the M25 highway though, that was good work.

But Big S I am not.


[KA-CHAK] (sound of a machine gun being armed)

All right, you trans-thread hopping interlopers: what the frell is happening here ? This thread is not even supposed to exist, and you've just made me blown my cover. Answer fast !


*pops in*

HAIL DISCORD!!

*chucks a pineapple at Bucko*

*warps out*


Oriental Gnome did it!


Ho no, you don't !

[BZOING] (Bucko smashes the button of his quantum belt, thus violently violating the agreed-upon local physics paradigm, with the net effect of triggering a localized epistemological machine chain reaction... in brief: he duplicates !

Before one of him jumps in the warp exhaust wake of the Discordian creature.

[BZOING OUT]

SO... what were you saying, you noxious interlopers ?


Y U Throw Ur Mom?

I'd bet an angel's sword uses Holy fire that at least deals half flame damage, and may let the angel Smite 3/day. That'd be an awesome weapon! lets the weilder smite 1-3 times per day either as a palidan of a particular level, or uses the character's level and cha for it.

I'm here late cause i found the thread on my sidebar, and wanted to share some win


Grim Bucko, anti-duck zealot wrote:
SO... what were you saying, you noxious interlopers ?

Hi!

*sprays Bucko with trick flower*

*drops out of warp and Changes Shape, blends into crowd*


[Wfooosh]... emerging from a constrained wormhole bleeding out from under the thread's consensual reality parameters.

Grim dodges the trick flower.

"What's that ? A flower ? Have you no decency, you trans-thread hopping hippie ?"

[ploomf] goes the flower, letting rosy cupcakes in its wake.

"You're a tough customer, Longstrider, I'll give you that !"

Grim Bucko takes a little device out of his pocket, not unlike an Iphone. He activates it and it goes "ping ping ping".

"pro-xi-mi-ty al-ert ! rea-li-ty de-viant de-tec... ted !" quips the little machine.

"I know that, you insufferrable gadget ! Why did you think I arose you from your comatose memory storage ? Now, stop talking like a retarded 2nd millenium robot and track him ! He/she/it made the mistake of leaving the trick flower behind him/her/it. It should have his diagrammatic intent around it ! Track it !"

"Hu, boss... I see no flower..."

"Yeah, well, they're cupcakes now. Don't waste my time with this kind of details, Bob !"


And they're gone, the hyped-up 4th millenium Iphone and its Grim master, re-absorbeb by the wormhole, which pops out of existence some 5 seconds later, letting the thread just a little torn up.


unfortunately for the whale, the wormhole closed moments before he fell into it, and his new found existence was cut tragically short when he got to meet his new friend the ground face to face, up close and personal. The cupcake on the other-hand was rather pleased by the fact that it remained alive in it's quantum state and had not yet been eaten.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

"Something's not right... I can smell it !"

Grim Bucko looks around him. The landscape looks sort of familiar, but he can't pinpoint what it is exactly.

Then he looks upwards, and sees himself hovering in a (relative to him) temporally-freezed frame:

----->

Quote:

Grim Bucko

[Wfooosh]... emerging from a constrained wormhole bleeding out from under the thread's consensual reality parameters.

Grim dodges the trick flower.

"What's that ? A flower ? Have you no decency, you trans-thread hopping hippie ?"

[ploomf] goes the flower, letting rosy cupcakes in its wake.

"You're a tough customer, Longstrider, I'll give you that !"

Grim Bucko takes a little device out of his pocket, not unlike an Iphone. He activates it and it goes "ping ping ping".

"pro-xi-mi-ty al-ert ! rea-li-ty de-viant de-tec... ted !" quips the little machine.

"I know that, you insufferrable gadget ! Why did you think I arose you from your comatose memory storage ? Now, stop talking like a retarded 2nd millenium robot and track him ! He/she/it made the mistake of leaving the trick flower behind him/her/it. It should have his diagrammatic intent around it ! Track it !"

"Hu, boss... I see no flower..."

"Yeah, well, they're cupcakes now. Don't waste my time with this kind of details, Bob !"

"Damn ! The Longstrider deviant warped out of the thread and warped in the same thread again ! You devious fiend ! Do you know how dangerous that is ? And now you've made me do it, too."

"You've got to admit it, boss: that's pretty clever !"

"Yeah. Clever like launching a tactical nuke to create a diversion during a swordfight ! Now, let me think, Bob... I've got to set it straight or the local thread is doomed..."


*from her place in the crowd, Ensirio activates her Trigger Primal Magic Event Revelation as Bucko argues with his little pocket Inevitable.*

*in the ensuing chaos, she "drops" one of her golden apples into the crowd and "bumps" it toward an innocent local authority figure, then meanders on her way*


Grim Bucko suddenly... disappears without any warning.

Then a door appears, floating in space, and from the door Grim Bucko exits slowly.

He looks up there.

"Hum, that's how she did it, then. An apple. Simple. And mythological. The most dreadful and efficient combination of all."

Grim Bucko manipulates some controls on his thoracic breastplate.

"Let's see... oranges, no (too colored)... coconut, no: too drab... ha, banana ! Excellent"

The reality policeman seems quite pleased with himself.

"Next time, witch, you won't give me the slip so easily."

"Well, it is time to go"

And he's gone, in the blink of an eye, with just a whiff of metaphysically displaced air.


Loose.

Silver Crusade

I win!


(wrong thread.

Silver Crusade

Shoots hobbs for refusing to accept my victory.


huzzah!!!


Win thread? I don't understand. What have I won?



you made your own thread?

really?

you humans are weird


I still won.


huzzzah!

Silver Crusade

I win SORTA.

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