Your Daily Dose of WTF: D&D Bachelor Party


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Words fail me.

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/nva/tlg/3310486791.html


That's kinda awesome. Points for asking, but I don't think it will be fulfilled. The whole thing sounds like it was cooked up to win a bet or it is a VERY specific fantasy.


craigslist wrote:

Description:

Looking for a woman with Dungeon Master experience in Dungeons and Dragons (specifically 3.0 or 3.5 editions) to run a game. The event is for a Bachelor Party and the "future husband to be" would prefer if the DM could be topless. With that said, I ensure you that nothing else is expect of you other than an exciting adventure.

Requirements:

Dungeon Master experience in Dungeons and Dragons (preferably in 3rd or 3.5 Editions)

Must be able to provide a picture including the face and body (No nudes please.)

It is preferable that cup size be at least C or greater.

If books are needed it must be stated ahead of time however it would be preferable if the DM had her own.

Clientele:
There will be 5 "guys" that will be participation including myself. We are at all above the age of 24. Each of us are gentlemen and will treat the Dungeon Master with the utmost of respect.

Compensation:
I honestly don't know how to charge for this kind of service because it's not something typically done so the compensation will be negotiated. It's expected that the session last no less than 30 minutes.

Date:
A day prior to October 11th (The Day of the Wedding) would be ideal.

Location:
The location will be negotiated but priority will be give to the preference of the Dungeon Master.

Any other questions will be answered as needed. Only serious applicants need apply.

They want a topless DM, but no nudes--however, they have cup size preferences.

...Cthulhu up yet?


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When my cousin was getting married, his wife-to-be insisted that his Bachelor Party needed to involve strippers. None of us, including the groom, had any real interest in hiring a stripper or going to a club.

We briefly discussed hiring a stripper to just sit on the couch and play video games with us (no stripping involved at all) but ultimately couldn't figure out the logistics and just went to a club after all.

If only we had thought to post to Craigslist...

Lantern Lodge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16

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I had near the opposite problem; I was going to a friend's house for my bachelor party game night, but then ended up at a strip club.

\was actually a bit miffed at the lack of cards and gaming that night


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I like how the word guys is in quotes. You usually do that when you are being sarcastic or if you are Nancy Grace.


Black Powder Chocobo wrote:

I had near the opposite problem; I was going to a friend's house for my bachelor party game night, but then ended up at a strip club.

\was actually a bit miffed at the lack of cards and gaming that night

A stunt like that could ruin friendships. I don't know if I'd ever forgive this "friend." ;)

Kalshane wrote:

When my cousin was getting married, his wife-to-be insisted that his Bachelor Party needed to involve strippers. None of us, including the groom, had any real interest in hiring a stripper or going to a club.

We briefly discussed hiring a stripper to just sit on the couch and play video games with us (no stripping involved at all) but ultimately couldn't figure out the logistics and just went to a club after all.

Is it weird that this reminds me of a certain Friends episode? I may have watched that show way too often.


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Black Powder Chocobo wrote:

I had near the opposite problem; I was going to a friend's house for my bachelor party game night, but then ended up at a strip club.

\was actually a bit miffed at the lack of cards and gaming that night

This reminds me of a surprise birthday party my wife threw for me when I turned 30. The party was disguised as my Star Wars KoTOR group getting together to finally finish off the last session we had hanging for the past year unplayed. We seriously got to the very end of the campaign and left off. I was super excited to play Star Wars and FINALLY end a campaign properly, giving the story some final closure, but it turned out to be a surprise party.

On one hand, the effort and attention my wife showed getting all my friends together, keeping it all secret, this really wowed me. But I can't deny, a selfish bit of gamer-troll in me was a bit disappointed we weren't actually finishing that campaign after all...

Sovereign Court

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Josh M. wrote:
Black Powder Chocobo wrote:

I had near the opposite problem; I was going to a friend's house for my bachelor party game night, but then ended up at a strip club.

\was actually a bit miffed at the lack of cards and gaming that night

This reminds me of a surprise birthday party my wife threw for me when I turned 30. The party was disguised as my Star Wars KoTOR group getting together to finally finish off the last session we had hanging for the past year unplayed. We seriously got to the very end of the campaign and left off. I was super excited to play Star Wars and FINALLY end a campaign properly, giving the story some final closure, but it turned out to be a surprise party.

On one hand, the effort and attention my wife showed getting all my friends together, keeping it all secret, this really wowed me. But I can't deny, a selfish bit of gamer-troll in me was a bit disappointed we weren't actually finishing that campaign after all...

I'd be kinda dissapointed too...but kudos to your lady.


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Josh M. wrote:


But I can't deny, a selfish bit of gamer-troll in me was a bit disappointed we weren't actually finishing that campaign after all...

You could have asked for that for your birthday!?!

Also, it was your birthday, you are allowed to cast "Wish" 1/year.


Lochmonster wrote:
Josh M. wrote:


But I can't deny, a selfish bit of gamer-troll in me was a bit disappointed we weren't actually finishing that campaign after all...

You could have asked for that for your birthday!?!

Also, it was your birthday, you are allowed to cast "Wish" 1/year.

That was kinda what I wanted, actually, lol. My friends were all "busy" that weekend(planning for the party), so the only ones who were available to hang out also happen to be the SW group. So I said, "hey, lets finish out that SW game once and for all!"

So yeah, I was torn. Everyone showed up and surprised me, but my first reaction was "Oh, guess we're not gaming after all..." I'm just glad I didn't say it out loud, lol.


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So basically, they want someone to run a D&D game while simultaneously being the biggest distraction at the table disrupting their game.

...

Whatever floats their boat, I guess.

Sovereign Court

It takes great willpower to game with naked breasts present. If they succeed, i will salute them...


Hey, it might be their last game in such composition. Give them a break :P


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Hey, it might be their last breasts in such composition. Give them a break :P


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I just cannot, for the unlife of me, figure out why they opted for such a bizarre scenario when one, two, or more topless barmaids in period garb would've added to atmosphere and satisfied bachelor party requirements.

Sovereign Court

The point is that a hot topless GM is way more of a turn-on...


Shadowborn wrote:

So basically, they want someone to run a D&D game while simultaneously being the biggest distraction at the table disrupting their game.

...

Whatever floats their boat, I guess.

This was my thought too. Trying to get through a game with exposed breasts at the table would be too frustrating to be any fun.

Save the boobs for after the game is over.


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They should've just hired strippers and had a proper bachelor party.

Sovereign Court

Some people don't like 'proper' stuff.
I have a friend. He is a gamer. His friends hired him a stripper for a bachelor party, and all that he wanted was a pleasant evening with friends, some junk food, soda and booze. So he payed the stripper and asked her to leave.

Not everyone's tastes are the same.
Plus maybe those guys luck out and find a stripper who is actually a GM. Weirder things happen. One of the best GMs i ever played with was a prostitute (we didn't know that, she is good about separating her two lives). A friend chanced upon her one night and told us. Still an awesome GM.


Hama wrote:

Some people don't like 'proper' stuff.

I have a friend. He is a gamer. His friends hired him a stripper for a bachelor party, and all that he wanted was a pleasant evening with friends, some junk food, soda and booze. So he payed the stripper and asked her to leave.

I'm guessing he could have done that just about any time. A stripper may not be to his liking, but *sheesh* you might as well make something special of the occasion and do something you don't normally do. Getting married and having a party thrown in your honor doesn't happen that often - why waste it?


Bill Dunn wrote:
Hama wrote:

Some people don't like 'proper' stuff.

I have a friend. He is a gamer. His friends hired him a stripper for a bachelor party, and all that he wanted was a pleasant evening with friends, some junk food, soda and booze. So he payed the stripper and asked her to leave.
I'm guessing he could have done that just about any time. A stripper may not be to his liking, but *sheesh* you might as well make something special of the occasion and do something you don't normally do. Getting married and having a party thrown in your honor doesn't happen that often - why waste it?

Because this isn't your kind of entertainment? Heck knows if my friends did this for me I'd probably do exactly the same thing, and be incredibly uncomfortable about it the whole time and for some time to come. Granted, I think my friends would know me well enough not to hire a stripper for me, but that's beside the point.

Sovereign Court

Heck, i wouldn't want a stripper on my bachelor party. If i even have one (not a custom in my country). I'd rather play some kind of game or just get drunk a lot and tell jokes.


I'm mostly safe as I won't be getting married so a bachelor party won't be happening, heh. But the general idea of "special event - hire a stripper" making me incredibly WTF and completely understanding the guy just wanting a night with food, friends, and gaming instead still applies.


Orthos wrote:


Because this isn't your kind of entertainment? Heck knows if my friends did this for me I'd probably do exactly the same thing, and be incredibly uncomfortable about it the whole time and for some time to come. Granted, I think my friends would know me well enough not to hire a stripper for me, but that's beside the point.

You're getting hung up on the stripper. It doesn't have to be a stripper. Go shoot some pool. Play paintball. Go rent some time at a shooting range. Get tickets for a live sporting event and rent a bus or limo to take you there. Have everyone bring their computers over for an all-night LAN game. Go and indulge in something you don't normally have the opportunity to do. That's ultimately what a bachelor party is best at.

Sitting around with buddies, eating junk food, and drinking soda and alcohol? That's our regular game night and we do that every week.


I thought the point of the bachelor party is to do something that you won't be able to do, or only rarely be able to do, after you become a father/husband. Hence the stripper cliche.

(Granted, one would hope that gaming doesn't fall into this category, but ya never know...)


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I just had a bunch of friends and my brothers over for a night of drinking and video games. It was a nice change of pace from our "normal" borderline-hedonistic parties.

Honestly, strippers and strip clubs have never really interested me. I literally cannot pay a stripper enough money to do what my lovely wife does for me willingly(and for free).

Protip: Marry a perv.


Bill Dunn wrote:
Orthos wrote:
Because this isn't your kind of entertainment? Heck knows if my friends did this for me I'd probably do exactly the same thing, and be incredibly uncomfortable about it the whole time and for some time to come. Granted, I think my friends would know me well enough not to hire a stripper for me, but that's beside the point.
You're getting hung up on the stripper.

Heh. Sorry about that. That would be the part that would make me most O.o though.

Quote:

It doesn't have to be a stripper. Go shoot some pool. Play paintball. Go rent some time at a shooting range. Get tickets for a live sporting event and rent a bus or limo to take you there. Have everyone bring their computers over for an all-night LAN game. Go and indulge in something you don't normally have the opportunity to do. That's ultimately what a bachelor party is best at.

Sitting around with buddies, eating junk food, and drinking soda and alcohol? That's our regular game night and we do that every week.

I'm a creature of habit. Novelty is not an immense attraction to me. =)


I'm actually with Orthos on this one. Different strokes for different folks... the guy who posted the Craigslist ad might be giving his buddy the perfect Bachelor's party.

Just cause you don't appreciate it doesn't mean it's stupid or a wasted evening or anything.


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I have a friend who requested a D&D bachelor party. He was part of my old gaming group in college and his wedding was going to represent the first time since graduation that the core members of that group got together in one place. He wanted a D&D game with the old gang. He could get falling down drunk any time. He hadn't been able to play D&D with his old friends in years and he wanted to do it again one more time.


Now I'm interested in just how this would work.

Does she strip during the game or just show up topless? Is this a one shot?

Also, this reminds me of my own Batchelor party, where we started talking about gaming work some of the ladies there. One of them just walked away the instant we go super geeky. Another was more patient and tried to follow the conversation for a whole until she said "okay, I give up!" We all had a good laugh, her included, when our DM pointed out we were scaring the girls off talking about d&d when we paid them well for their company!


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I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)? I am having a hard time figuring out that statement. And don't you need to have respect for your GM and trust that she is trying to create a memorable game? This sounds like it would quickly become a joke session. And what girl would destroy her reputation among her regular players by doing this?


Aranna wrote:

I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)? I am having a hard time figuring out that statement. And don't you need to have respect for your GM and trust that she is trying to create a memorable game? This sounds like it would quickly become a joke session. And what girl would destroy her reputation among her regular players by doing this?

My guess is they mean they're not going to crack jokes about her or try to grope her or anything along those lines.

I'm not sure what her regular players have to do with it. They're not going to be there. And if doing such a thing would "destroy her reputation" with them, I imagine she wouldn't tell them (or even do it in the first place).

If the people involved were asking a woman who normally gamed with them to do this, I would definitely see it as crossing a line and being very unfair to the woman in question, but I don't see any moral difference between this and hiring a stripper to do more typical stripper things.

I don't know. The situation seems like it would be really awkward, even if they found someone willing to do this, but I can't point at it and say "that's wrong."


In the age of the internet and social networks, nothing you do is private.

Her future boss is likely to find out if he researches her background.

If she works as a stripper then fine, no harm done... but a regular GM?


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So what is more damaging to her cred in the eyes of her boss?

Being a stripper? Or being a regular GM?

:D

Sovereign Court

If a future boss stumbled upon something like that and disregarded her because of that, than he is an as**le, and she shouldn't work for him. Because everyone did things that he/she is not proud off, or did it once. You cannot judge a person because she once bared her breasts in front of a group of people for a bachelor party.


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Aranna wrote:

I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)?

While I get what you mean, respectfulness does not = clothes. Some cultures are more puritan than others, different culture have different approaches to clothes and sexuality.

In some countries, you could ask "Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job while showing her ankles in front of you". My wife's European and on hot summer days, she does goes around topless, and she does have my utmost respect.

I understand that this particular example is set in a particular context; that of a bachelor party. In this case, the "topless element" is meant as a sexual/enticing act but still, I'm positive that I can give respect to a women that tries to seduce me; the fact that some men seem incapable of doing so is another matter.


Aranna wrote:

I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)? I am having a hard time figuring out that statement. And don't you need to have respect for your GM and trust that she is trying to create a memorable game? This sounds like it would quickly become a joke session. And what girl would destroy her reputation among her regular players by doing this?

While I am an admirer of the wonderful aesthetic qualities of boobs. Boobs are boobs and we all have them. Do you find it difficult to be respectful to Lifeguards, who spend their day in speedo's and nothing more. I have seen women leering at lifeguards (we call them surf lifesavers) and I have a friend who was in "the Thunder From Downunder male dance review" he said women are often thrown out of their performances because they break the no touching rules in big ways.

In Australia toplessness is acceptable at the beach, as long as you follow the "it's like the sun - you look then look away" rule then things are good if you leer or ogle then that is bad form.

I said no strippers for my bachelor party. I had a pub crawl instead it was good fun, I couldn't have had a game night as two thirds of my friends don't play RPGs.

In regards to the game in the OP can see how it would be a novelty for about 5 mins, after that it would be just uncomfortable.

My main concern is they expect the game to last a min of 30 mins.


Freehold DM wrote:

Now I'm interested in just how this would work.

Does she strip during the game or just show up topless? Is this a one shot?

And more importantly, will she use a DM screen which protects her secret DM info but defeats the purpose of being topless? Then again, with a C cup, maybe she won't need a DM screen...

The Exchange

Black Powder Chocobo wrote:

I had near the opposite problem; I was going to a friend's house for my bachelor party game night, but then ended up at a strip club.

\was actually a bit miffed at the lack of cards and gaming that night

I was lucky and had a bachelor party weekend, we rented a cabin out in the mountains and played a one-shot 11th level adventure. Only thing was the first night, we went out for steaks and some of the guys were adamant of stopping by a strip club for a couple hours. The thing was, I was thinking... 'damn, that's gonna eat into the adventure time, I hope we can finish this module in time before the weekend is over....'


Laurefindel wrote:
Aranna wrote:

I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)?

While I get what you mean, respectfulness does not = clothes. Some cultures are more puritan than others, different culture have different approaches to clothes and sexuality.

In some countries, you could ask "Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job while showing her ankles in front of you". My wife's European and on hot summer days, she does goes around topless, and she does have my utmost respect.

I understand that this particular example is set in a particular context; that of a bachelor party. In this case, the "topless element" is meant as a sexual/enticing act but still, I'm positive that I can give respect to a women that tries to seduce me; the fact that some men seem incapable of doing so is another matter.

If you're hanging out topless, or even nude, for reasons not related to the nudity, then sure. No problem.

If you're hiring someone to strip for you, it's a different story. The whole point is to look at the boobs. I suppose it depends on what you mean by "utmost respect".


I have gone to multiple strip clubs before and after my Batchelor party, and I am always respectful. Jerks get kicked out hard, and the strippers sometimes have friends waiting outside whom the establishment turns a blind eye to. Not that I need this kind of motivation, mind. I am the weird guy who attempts to talk to them and hang out a bit before going for the dollar bills. I need to make sure I am not being rolled or set up. If so, I find another establishment, if not, it's time to party/hang.


I think it depends on what you mean by "respectful".

It varies depending on the situation. What's considered respectful at a strip club probably isn't at the nude beach.

I've been known to skinny-dip or use naked hot tubs in mixed company from time to time. The respectful thing to do then is to generally ignore the nudity. Not stare. Not comment. At least pretend you're not looking.
I'm not much on strip clubs, but I don't think they kick you out for looking? That would sort of defeat the purpose.

What do the people in this ad mean? We're not going to sexually assault you? We're not going to drool and make crude comments? We're going to pay you to show your tits and then not look at them? Somehow I doubt the last.

If I had a well-endowed female GM wearing a low cut shirt and I spent the whole game staring at her cleavage, I'd consider that disrespectful. I assume the standards would be different in this case, but I'm not sure exactly what they'd be. I certainly wouldn't expect her to be treated just the same as any other GM. The fact that the point is the boobs makes a difference.


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Aranna wrote:

I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)? I am having a hard time figuring out that statement. And don't you need to have respect for your GM and trust that she is trying to create a memorable game? This sounds like it would quickly become a joke session. And what girl would destroy her reputation among her regular players by doing this?

That's guy code for "we'll just look at 'em...won't try to touch 'em or nothin', honest..."

Sovereign Court

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You know lots of people not digging this idea but I bet it would be a bachelor party to remember. To be honest I think that's the most important thing. I got a great story for y'all its a little off topic but I'm going there non the less.

I got invited to this stag party about 10 years ago. The best man lined up one of those party buses with a keg and driver that takes you around the city. Not a bad way to go we always got to keep the party going. Anyways we decided to stop at one of the smaller joints on the out skirts of town. I think the main idea was to get our moneys worth from the keg on the bus. So we go in this place called BJ's or maybe it was the Double Deuce I don't exactly recall. We get in order some drinks watch a few stage dances.

So the DJ announces a new girl coming out and we are all sitting at a table checking out various dancers. The girl comes out losses her top and starts dancing. After about a min on stage she looks out at our table. She has this look like she is trying to focus on something. A moment later her look turns to shock and the hand comes up over the mouth and the girl flies off stage towards the dressing rooms.

Girl comes running up to our table in a robe. She starts talking to the bachelor like she knows him. After a few exchanges I start to realize the dancer is the bachelors niece! There was a few "What are you doing here?" followed by (and God how I will remember this for all my days), "Don't tell Grandma!" So of course we start having a ball with this asking her to come out with us telling her its ok we wont tell, meanwhile the bachelor is telling her to stay away from these a**h***s lol. So yeah thats it.

/on topic


Maybe it's just culture shock. I was raised in a very strict religious community. You know, no TV, no Computers, mom stayed at home, I even wore handmade clothing my mother made for me. I guess there are certain things I still would be ashamed to do despite having been exposed to public schools after my parents divorce.

Maybe I am not as worldly as I imagined.


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Aranna wrote:

I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)? I am having a hard time figuring out that statement. And don't you need to have respect for your GM and trust that she is trying to create a memorable game? This sounds like it would quickly become a joke session. And what girl would destroy her reputation among her regular players by doing this?

I know quite a few female players who would have no problem doing something like this. Pretty sure my sister in law would find it hillarious. Know anyone who has been to one of the more risque cons? My friends who go to Wicked Faire or GKE (Geek Kink Event) would love something like this, though I know a lot who would be afraid to do it for guys they don't know in a private environment.

Hell, in one of my games the 2 female players are routinely playing in their underwear because they are more comfortable.


Aranna wrote:

Maybe it's just culture shock. I was raised in a very strict religious community. You know, no TV, no Computers, mom stayed at home, I even wore handmade clothing my mother made for me. I guess there are certain things I still would be ashamed to do despite having been exposed to public schools after my parents divorce.

Maybe I am not as worldly as I imagined.

Body shame is a cultural thing.

There have been human cultures where it would be considered strange that a woman had to cover up her breast, but men can bandy about their bare nipples all they please, even the large subset of men who basically have breasts. What gives?

Not picking on you specifically Aranna. I periodically become aware of my own hangups, too. It's a drag to have intellectual beliefs about equality and personal freedom but constantly find yourself backsliding into repression driven by a culture you want no part of.

If were the correct sexual configuration to take this job, I would do it. In a nice Grecian toga like some goddess of antiquity. It would be downright classy.


It's not just body shame though. I see a big difference being comfortable with your body or with nudity and turning it into a commodity.
I've hung out with groups where casual nudity was acceptable and I've got no problem with it. Hiring a stripper to show you her breasts is not at all like that.


Caineach wrote:
Aranna wrote:

I probably shouldn't post to this... but I have to ask:

Can you guys really give a girl "utmost respect" while she is performing any job topless in front of you (GMing in particular)? I am having a hard time figuring out that statement. And don't you need to have respect for your GM and trust that she is trying to create a memorable game? This sounds like it would quickly become a joke session. And what girl would destroy her reputation among her regular players by doing this?

I know quite a few female players who would have no problem doing something like this. Pretty sure my sister in law would find it hillarious. Know anyone who has been to one of the more risque cons? My friends who go to Wicked Faire or GKE (Geek Kink Event) would love something like this, though I know a lot who would be afraid to do it for guys they don't know in a private environment.

Hell, in one of my games the 2 female players are routinely playing in their underwear because they are more comfortable.

I have got to go to wicked winter this year.

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