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Three Questions to see if we can be friends


Off-Topic Discussions

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Andoran

Stolen from Chuck Klosterman, yet I've found them accurate in my experience.

1. Let us assume you met a rudimentary magician. Let us assume he can do five simple tricks–he can pull a rabbit out of his hat, he can make a coin disappear, he can turn the ace of spades into the Joker card, and two others in a similar vein. These are his only tricks and he can’t learn any more; he can only do these five. HOWEVER, it turns out he’s doing these five tricks with real magic. It’s not an illusion; he can actually conjure the bunny out of the ether and he can move the coin through space. He’s legitimately magical, but extremely limited in scope and influence.

Would this person be more impressive than Albert Einstein?

2. Let us assume a fully grown, completely healthy Clydesdale horse has his hooves shackled to the ground while his head is held in place with thick rope. He is conscious and standing upright, but completely immobile. And let us assume that–for some reason–every political prisoner on earth (as cited by Amnesty International) will be released from captivity if you can kick this horse to death in less than twenty minutes. You are allowed to wear steel-toed boots.

Would you attempt to do this?

3. Let us assume there are two boxes on a table. In one box, there is a relatively normal turtle; in the other, Adolf Hitler’s skull. You have to select one of these items for your home. If you select the turtle, you can’t give it away and you have to keep it alive for two years; if either of these parameters are not met, you will be fined $999 by the state. If you select Hitler’s skull, you are required to display it in a semi-prominent location in your living room for the same amount of time, although you will be paid a stipend of $120 per month for doing so. Display of the skull must be apolitical.

Which option do you select?


1) No
2) No
3) Turtle.


1. More impressive.

2. No.

3. Turtle.

Qadira

1)Yes(Sounds like a Sorcerer to me)
2)No
3)Turtles rock.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

1) yes (thats outside human parameters which is pretty damn impressive. Now if you were asking me who I'd rather hang out with, Einstein, hands down. As a bonus, you could get Einstein to study how he moves the coin through space, inventing teleportation.))
2) Yes. To me people > animals
3) Easy peasy. Ill take the money for having an apolitical skull which has way less health risk than a disease infested turtle (they really are). Plus Im a history buff, so bonus.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

1) I don't know. Who's got better weed?
2) Yes, but I might be reduced to vomitting.
3) Hitler's skull. Talk about a conversation piece!

Andoran

TheWhiteknife wrote:

1) yes (thats outside human parameters which is pretty damn impressive. Now if you were asking me who I'd rather hang out with, Einstein, hands down. As a bonus, you could get Einstein to study how he moves the coin through space, inventing teleportation.))

2) Yes. To me people > animals
3) Easy peasy. Ill take the money for having an apolitical skull which has way less health risk than a disease infested turtle (they really are). Plus Im a history buff, so bonus.

Yup.


1) Yes. Not so much that this person is more impressive, however, as that his abilities break physics. Einstein came up with new explanations for certain types of physics - this guy requires the world to come up with new explanations for way more.

2) No. It would be a worthy attempt, despite the cost, because worse things happen to some of those people every day and there's so many more of them, but there's no way I could kick a horse to death in 20 minutes...or probably at all, for that matter. <_<

3) Hitler skull. It's apolitical, so while I can't put it as anti-Hitler, it's also not pro-Hitler, and I'm getting paid to do nothing. <_<


1. Yes. Al failed math. His theories today are falling apart under greater understanding. Don't get me wrong, he was an innovative leader and thinker of his day, but we've moved on.

2. No. humans aren't worth the cruelty I'd have to make myself perform on hand. There's no guarantee that the monstrosities performed on other humans wouldn't restart minutes after the "prisoners" were freed.

3. Hitler's skull, Hell yea, and proud of the clear glass panel and wet erase markers available for anyone to draw stupid faces concept.

4. Pretty much don't need to be friends with someone who requires a test for their friends. :P


DrowVampyre wrote:

1) Yes. Not so much that this person is more impressive, however, as that his abilities break physics. Einstein came up with new explanations for certain types of physics - this guy requires the world to come up with new explanations for way more.

2) No. It would be a worthy attempt, despite the cost, because worse things happen to some of those people every day and there's so many more of them, but there's no way I could kick a horse to death in 20 minutes...or probably at all, for that matter. <_<

3) Hitler skull. It's apolitical, so while I can't put it as anti-Hitler, it's also not pro-Hitler, and I'm getting paid to do nothing. <_<

See, my thinking is almost identical to 1) and 2). As for 3), many turtle species are threatened/endangered here in FL. You should see the turtle rescue programs down here that have to surgically excise tumors and treat diseases in sea turtles from the pollution. So, a chance to keep one turtle healthy and thriving for two years sounds like a win to me, even if I don't get paid for it.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

1. Tough call. Although I'm a huge fan of Al, breaking physical laws is amazing. The magician is more impressive.

2. No. Don't think I could even try. I'd like to say its a personal code or sanctity of life thing, but I think it would more likely come down to being squeamish.

3. The skull. Labeling it as "Hitler" would be political all by itself, so in my house it's just a skull. I've done turtles. They're cool and interesting at times. They're also smelly and often boring most of the time. I much prefer my dog.

I guess I could be friends with DrowVampyre.

Shadow Lodge

ciretose wrote:

Stolen from Chuck Klosterman, yet I've found them accurate in my experience.

1. Let us assume you met a rudimentary magician.
Would this person be more impressive than Albert Einstein?

-Yes, because completely violating the laws of physics is a lot more impressive than discovering them. Lots of people have discovered them, this would be the first person who had violated them.

We would have gotten relativity eventually from someone else. You go back in time, you kill Einstein, Henri Poincaré gets the credit.

2. Let us assume a fully grown, completely healthy Clydesdale horse has his hooves shackled to the ground while his head is held in place with thick rope.
Would you attempt to do this?

-No. The horse didn't deserve it, and i consider my chances of success with a broken foot far too low to justify killing an innocent animal.

3. Let us assume there are two boxes on a table. In one box, there is a relatively normal turtle; in the other, Adolf Hitler’s skull. You have to select one of these items for your home. If you select the turtle, you can’t give it away and you have to keep it alive for two years; if either of these parameters are not met, you will be fined $999 by the state. If you select Hitler’s skull, you are required to display it in a semi-prominent location in your living room for the same amount of time, although you will be paid a stipend of $120 per month for doing so. Display of the skull must be apolitical.

Hitlers skull. Screw the 120 dollars per month i'll charge 5 bucks for parking.


Meh, no. Al's a bro.

Hell no! I would kick a person to death in 20 minutes if it could release all horses from captivity though.

Skull (I could buy a turtle with my first payment if I wanted one). Though then I'd have to worry about people breaking in and stealing it, but the money I'd make should at least cover some basic security messures.

Andoran

shadowmage75 wrote:

1. Yes. Al failed math. His theories today are falling apart under greater understanding. Don't get me wrong, he was an innovative leader and thinker of his day, but we've moved on.

2. No. humans aren't worth the cruelty I'd have to make myself perform on hand. There's no guarantee that the monstrosities performed on other humans wouldn't restart minutes after the "prisoners" were freed.

3. Hitler's skull, Hell yea, and proud of the clear glass panel and wet erase markers available for anyone to draw stupid faces concept.

4. Pretty much don't need to be friends with someone who requires a test for their friends. :P

I don't actually use it. I've just found people I am friends with generally tend to answer the same way.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

1) The magician is more interesting because he's got a great phenomena we can study the crap out of and use to revolutionize our understanding of the universe, provided he's using real magic and not some kind of tricks that he just says are real magic. If the latter were the case, Einstein is infinitely more interesting but it wouldn't be hard to persuade me to replace the fraud with the horse in the next question.

2) That's all? S+~@, for that I'd torture the horse, rape it, you name it. Right here is the ability to do a great amount of good at no cost except some personal inconvenience and physical exertion on my part. Do you want to give me some free money too?

3) The skull is the better payoff. It's just a skull. So free money again. The turtle is pure cost. I'd pick nothing before I picked it.

Now I probably can't be anyone's friend. :)


Likely not. I'm really not a nice guy.

Andoran

BigNorseWolf wrote:


-No. The horse didn't deserve it, and i consider my chances of success with a broken foot far too low to justify killing an innocent animal.

It was the steel toed boots that won me over. I think I could do it with steel toed boots.

Andoran

Samnell wrote:

1) The magician is more interesting because he's got a great phenomena we can study the crap out of and use to revolutionize our understanding of the universe, provided he's using real magic and not some kind of tricks that he just says are real magic. If the latter were the case, Einstein is infinitely more interesting but it wouldn't be hard to persuade me to replace the fraud with the horse in the next question.

2) That's all? S#$@, for that I'd torture the horse, rape it, you name it. Right here is the ability to do a great amount of good at no cost except some personal inconvenience and physical exertion on my part. Do you want to give me some free money too?

3) The skull is the better payoff. It's just a skull. So free money again. The turtle is pure cost. I'd pick nothing before I picked it.

Now I probably can't be anyone's friend. :)

Except me :)


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
shadowmage75 wrote:
1. Yes. Al failed math.

This is untrue. Einstein was a math prodigy way ahead of his schooling. But it's a popular bit of sunshine to blow up the hind ends of people who aren't doing well at math. Screw the pablum, facts are facts.


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

1. No
2. No
3. Turtle

Looks like we can't be friends. Can we be frenemies?

Qadira

1. Yeah, Albert was a great mind, but within human capability. The other dude? He defies that.

2. Yes. I love animals, but I love people more. Hell I love some people to the point I would kick everyone else to death just to keep those few safe.

3. Turtle. Although I may use Hitler's skull as an ashtray... or a piss pot.

Qadira

ciretose wrote:
BigNorseWolf wrote:


-No. The horse didn't deserve it, and i consider my chances of success with a broken foot far too low to justify killing an innocent animal.
It was the steel toed boots that won me over. I think I could do it with steel toed boots.

Go for the windpipe. Even on a powerful creature like that, you take away it's ability to breath and it will die in minutes.


1. The magician. As awesome as we have a been lead to believe Einstein was, I have never thought him to be overly intelligent, just possessed of a semi - unique ability to create types of mathematical patterns and thinking that he could understand and get others to understand as well.

2. I am a Sagittarius born in the year of the horse. Killing one (not in game, mind) for a rather dubious reason would be horrid, and may bring serious bad juju.

3. Probably the skull. I assure you I will forget about it in time.


#1: Impressive. Could he teach me do that too?

#2: As much as I am meat loving omnivore with strong carnivore/scavenger streak who likes horse-meat kabanos I am all in favor of not being cruel to preprocessed food, er, herd animals. Also, all those political prisoners are not worth my future nightmares about kicking horse to death.

#3: Skull. I can't afford feeding the turtle. The skull stipend would actually help me feed myself. And I don't get guests anyway.


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
See, my thinking is almost identical to 1) and 2). As for 3), many turtle species are threatened/endangered here in FL. You should see the turtle rescue programs down here that have to surgically excise tumors and treat diseases in sea turtles from the pollution. So, a chance to keep one turtle healthy and thriving for two years sounds like a win to me, even if I don't get paid for it.

Aaaah, but how many would donating the $120 a month from your skull stipend save? More than 1 for more than 2 years? ^_-

Shadow Lodge

Yes.

No.

Skull.

Andoran

1 person marked this as a favorite.
DrowVampyre wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
See, my thinking is almost identical to 1) and 2). As for 3), many turtle species are threatened/endangered here in FL. You should see the turtle rescue programs down here that have to surgically excise tumors and treat diseases in sea turtles from the pollution. So, a chance to keep one turtle healthy and thriving for two years sounds like a win to me, even if I don't get paid for it.
Aaaah, but how many would donating the $120 a month from your skull stipend save? More than 1 for more than 2 years? ^_-

Excellent point.

Just for the record.

1. One is bound by the laws of the universe, one isn't. No question in my mind who is more impressive.

2. You can save the lives and/or prevent the torture of hundreds if not thousands of people who have been vetted as actual political prisoners if you will kill a single horse. No question in my mind I have to try.

3. I can risk losing 1000 bucks to pay out of my own pocket to care for a turtle, or I can get 120 dollars a month for the ultimate conversation piece. No question at all.

There are no right or wrong answers, but I do think answers say a lot about who you are and the type of people you would get along with.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

1. Einstein. Seriously. I think he would be good for science now.
2. There is no reason why cruelty to animals would free anyone, except if someone very powerful declared it so. Then it would be entertainment for that person, which I refuse to do. Besides which, I have no reason to trust such a person.
3. Skull. Awesome.

Andoran

1) I'd say he'd be every bit as impressive as Einstein, probably more so. They both have the ability to change how mankind perceives the world around us. Einstein did it by exploring the natural laws of the world in which we live, the magician would do it by showing that those laws can be broken. Ya, I think I'd take the magician hands down.

2) I've seen a clydesdale, I couldn't get any leverage to kick it while it was standing upright, even if I were to try. Beyond that, I'm not sure that releasing all political prisoners would be a good thing. (Though since you bring up amnesty international's list, that does have some weight to it.) In the end though trying would only waste 20 minutes of my life and torture an animal for an outcome that could not happen.

Note that this answer is purely based on physics. I do value human life over animal life.

3) Were it random skull vs. turtle, or even just hitler's skull vs. turtle I'd totally take the skull. But, for me, what it comes down to is that I'd have to have a permanent display set up in my house, and I'd rather have my privacy than the $120 a month. Turtle ftw!


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1. Einstein is a LOT more impressive. Your magician has a small assortment of parlor tricks; he doesn't know how they work, he can't teach them, and he can't really do anything useful with them. They may as well not exist. Einstein can figure out how stuff actually works -- a much wider range of stuff, as he already proved -- and transmit that knowledge to others.

2. I refuse to let a large, faceless organization like AI tell me who or what to kill. Also, it's beneath my sense of professionalism to kill something in that clumsy a manner, in view of witnesses. If something is worth doing, it's worth doing right!

3. Is this a trick? The skull is an inanimate object, and I get paid for it. The turtle is semi-animate, and potentially costs me money. There's got to be a catch. Like, are neo-Nazi thugs going to break into my house and kill me and my famility to get the skull? Will an Isreali hunter-killer team assassinate me for owning it? I need more information to make a decision.

Silver Crusade

1. Magician. Needing to rework our entire understanding of the physical world is pretty impressive.

2. No. I can see the "greater good" element of doing it, but I am not an "ends justifies the means" kind of guy.

3. I had to think about this one. I think I'd go with the skull, because it would be a conversation piece. Plus, the money could support my Paizo habit.

Andoran

1. Yes. Real, scientifically verifiable, magic is more impressive than genius alone.

2. I'd give it a shot. If you aim at the throat it should be doable, and even if you fail, you gave it a shot. I'm against animal cruelty...but sometimes (not always, just sometimes) the ends do justify the means.

3. Hitler skull. I'd charge for parking, and possibly have the opportunity to identify people who pay homage to it or sick s@@# like that and do...something about them. No idea what. The display is non-political, nothing says I have to be.

Taldor

Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Comics Subscriber; Pathfinder Campaign Setting, Companion, Modules, Roleplaying Game, Tales Subscriber

yes
no
skull

Cheliax

1) Not no but HELL NO

2) No -- and I'm embarrassed to say this is a real toughy for me. But no.

3) Hitler. Not even close. Duh, displaying it apolitically has no affect -- everyone assumes.

Lantern Lodge

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

1. Yes, although I'd be bugging the heck outta the magician on how he did it.

2. Yes, but only because I'd feel confident I could kill the horse quickly; it'd take a lot of screwdrivers otherwise to convince me to make a creature suffer over a 20 minute period.

3. Turtle; they're relatively easy to maintain and I don't want to see the people that would come over and WANT to see Hitler's skull.

Andoran

ciretose wrote:
BigNorseWolf wrote:


-No. The horse didn't deserve it, and i consider my chances of success with a broken foot far too low to justify killing an innocent animal.
It was the steel toed boots that won me over. I think I could do it with steel toed boots.

Considering how well steel toed boots served me in the joint, I'd say they'd be pretty effective.

Andoran RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

1. Einstein. The technologies we now have as a result of Einstein's theories are way cooler than prestidigitation.

2. No. Not because I lurves the horsies, but because probably most of those political prisoners are locked away for good reason and I'm not sure it's a good idea to unleash them all on the world. Change it to "persons innocent of any crime and unjustly imprisoned" and Mr. Ed's going down.

3. Hitler's skull. Cool story, bro. Also it would be a neat ashtray.

Andoran

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber

1. No. If he can just do it, it's not impressive. If he can tell me how it too him years of practice and work to learn or develop the abilities, then I may be impressed.

2. No. I will not harm an animal, least of all on some flimsy promise.

3. Hitler's skull. I already have enough work with a cat and dog. I don't need a turtle.

Andoran

1. No. Einstein would be cooler to have as a wing man.

2. Sure. Mostly because I hate Budweiser.

3. Hitler's skull. I'd be too tempted to make soup out of the turtle.

Andoran

TriOmegaZero wrote:

2. No. I will not harm an animal, least of all on some flimsy promise.

What if you had absolutely no doubt about the veracity of the promise.

Andoran

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber
ciretose wrote:
What if you had absolutely no doubt about the veracity of the promise.

I would still doubt that veracity.

And if they released them preemptively and demanded I comply, I still would not.


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Campaign Setting, Companion, Modules, Roleplaying Game Subscriber

1. Einstein. Suppose for the sake of argument that we really did have a genuine magic user. All that shows us is that magic is real - and then we need somebody of Einstein's caliber to explain it and make it accessible to the rest of us. The magic user himself is not remarkable other than his born-with talent. After he's done his vanishing coin trick for the 100th time (and his 15 minutes of fame are up), then he'll just be a curious footnote in history.

2. I'd kill the horse without blinking an eye provided I had a real way of killing it. Trying to kick a Clydesdale to death within 20 minutes is a fools errant - I won't do that.

3. Those that say Hitler's skull are also going to have to put up tremendously expensive security (in excess of a paltry $120 a month); or risk some seriously politically minded people visiting their place for the apolitical skull. It's not like Hitler's skull in your living room is a "hush hush" kinda thing. The world will know and if you take some 7 billion people, odds are there are one or two crazies in the lot. The question doesn't pose the ramifications of what happens if the skull is lost, damaged, stolen or otherwise tampered with - but I imagine there'd by some pretty upset people if something happened. Certainly enough to cost you $120 a month for the rest of your life.

I'd pay $999 upfront and give the turtle to a deserving home.

Andoran

1. The magician. I would take scientific proof of actual magic over a single brilliant scientist, if only by a slim margin.

2. I wouldn't try it, though mostly because many of the political prisoners in the world have been imprisoned justly (even though an equal number were injustly imprisoned). Also, it's nearly impossible to kick a draft horse to death in twenty minutes, even with steel-toed boots.

3. I would choose Hitler's skull. I'm not very good with animals, and someone else would do better to keep it. I also have an interest in curios, and the skull of an infamous dictator would be an amazing addition to any cabinet of curiosities, even without the stipend.

Qadira

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1. Einstien, he with his own thoughts and talent has expanded our understanding of the Universe. The Magiacian, even if using real magic is but playing with some force of the cosmos akin to using a remote control but only able to pick up 7 channels on basic cable.

2. Even though the lives of the many outweigh the lives of the one, and in this case a horse to boot, I could not and would not stoop to such level as to torture any living thing. Such cruelty should be leveled at those making such an offer.

3. I would take care of the Turtle. Hitlers skull was burned to ash and I would be hard pressed to believe that it was authentic.

Osirion

Pathfinder Deluxe Comics Subscriber; Pathfinder Adventure Path, Campaign Setting, Cards, Companion, Maps, Modules, Roleplaying Game, Tales Subscriber
ciretose wrote:


Just for the record.

1. One is bound by the laws of the universe, one isn't. No question in my mind who is more impressive.

Just for the record:

Both are bound by the laws of the universe. The existence of the magician would just prove that our understanding of the laws of the universe is less then complete. Knowing that, I would guess that there are others like him that I just don't know (he seems to be fairly quiet about his powers himself), so, without knowing anything else about him, Einstein is more impressive.

2) No. Whatever the reason for this might be, it would have to be a cruel and sickening game I don't want to take part in.

3) Turtle - I live in Germany and I clashed badly with nazi nutjobs before. Knowing that I would have to cope with those guys once they know I own the skull of their Führer - that isn't worth the money!

Silver Crusade

3 people marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure Path, Campaign Setting, Companion, Modules Subscriber

1. I like turtles.

2. I like turtles.

3. I like turtles.


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
JMD031 wrote:

1. No

2. No
3. Turtle

Looks like we can't be friends. Can we be frenemies?

I guess the answer to this is no as well. :(

Taldor

Mikaze wrote:

1. I like turtles.

2. I like turtles.

3. I like turtles.

Yes. This.

Andoran

feytharn wrote:


Just for the record:
Both are bound by the laws of the universe. The existence of the magician would just prove that our understanding of the laws of the universe is less then complete. Knowing that, I would guess that there are others like him that I just don't know (he seems to be fairly quiet about his powers himself), so, without knowing anything else about him, Einstein is more impressive.

The thing is, he's not bound by the laws of the universe, specifically because he is using actual magic, which by definition defies the laws of the universe.

What makes it so impressive is that it is, by definition, impossible if you believe laws govern the universe.

Andoran

Alexander Kilcoyne wrote:
Mikaze wrote:

1. I like turtles.

2. I like turtles.

3. I like turtles.

Yes. This.

Obligatory.

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