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The Official JMD031 Rant Thread


Off-Topic Discussions

101 to 150 of 1,251 << first < prev | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | next > last >>

Where are the rants? I need rants! THE MONKEY DEMANDS RANTS!!!


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Rants occur on a semi-random schedule as to ensure maximum creativity. With that said, I'll likely try to do one before the end of the weekend. NO PROMISES.


JMD031 wrote:
Rants occur on a semi-random schedule as to ensure maximum creativity. With that said, I'll likely try to do one before the end of the weekend. THAT'S A PROMISE!

I'm going to hold you to that.


I look forward to the rant against pushy Monkey Kings.


I heard there was going to be a rant about me.


Well a pushy Monkey King was asking for a rant... so maybe it will be a combination rant? Who knows?

Honestly seems like everyone here wants rants about them. Give JMD031 a break he is a busy guy and you can't just come up with this sort of things off the cuff. It take creativity to come up with rants. You would think you would know better, after all the rants you went off on as Leafear the Lost. Honestly some people getting big heads when someone writes something about them. I for one hope JMD031 rants about something completely different perhaps rants on starfish or purple people eaters and what they have done to the environment and childrens sleep patterns. I mean Purple People Eaters eating everything in site what a mess that causes and then singing songs glorifying them and scary young children... they should be outlawed really. Well enough of that JMD031 has a rant to think about.


That rant will tide me over.


Glad I could help fill the gap.

Cheliax

The Mad Badger wrote:
Glad I could help fill the gap.

That's what she said!


Wow that ended any further comments here for like 24 hrs how come? I mean that was not too rude was it? I suppose I laughed a little at it? Whjat are people doing reading the political threads that much? Come on guys lets pick it up a little in here. JMD031 I think we could all use a little ranting before this thread goes the way of the dodo here which would really stink, I mean extinction really sucks not only do you die but no one in your entire race is around either. Poor Dodo bird survivied for so long then the introduction of dogs and animals not from the area screw everything up how wasa he supposed to compete he didn't even have time to evolve and get better at his stuff. Imagine waking up one day and this group of guys have invaded your turf where you are top dog and they can totally kick your butt even at stuff you used to be really good at and then you are fired because you aren't as good as them and they dont even give you a chance to get better at it even like a no refresher class or nigth class to learn some more skills ... nope you and your family get death. That stinks man.

Andoran

Today Im am going to rant about . . . . .. . . . .. . ..
INTERNET PEOPLE.

Spoiler:
my immortal inspired this rant

So the problem the way I see it is not that they're internet (I reject the assumption that internety is inherently bad, by the way) or that they're anonymous (sure, a fear or retribution will certainly tone down stuff but not entirely eliminate the problem), but thet thay're detached. You can have an urge to say osmething rude, and swiftly say it, and you won't get immediately social repercushions. No, you're just sitting at your computer and you say something rude, and by the time the other person reads it maybe you've forgotten about it; or peerhaps you didn't word it in the right way and that's bad! but it's not your fault. and it's not the fault if the person who reads it wrong, but they shouldn't blame you for not being good with words. I know a lot of jerks who are like, "hey durp derp your comment comes off as racist so therefore you are racist and THEY DONT' GIVE THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT!!!!1! sometimes people is sometimes mean


Gark the Goblin wrote:

Today Im am going to rant about . . . . .. . . . .. . ..

INTERNET PEOPLE. ** spoiler omitted **

So the problem the way I see it is not that they're internet (I reject the assumption that internety is inherently bad, by the way) or that they're anonymous (sure, a fear or retribution will certainly tone down stuff but not entirely eliminate the problem), but thet thay're detached. You can have an urge to say osmething rude, and swiftly say it, and you won't get immediately social repercushions. No, you're just sitting at your computer and you say something rude, and by the time the other person reads it maybe you've forgotten about it; or peerhaps you didn't word it in the right way and that's bad! but it's not your fault. and it's not the fault if the person who reads it wrong, but they shouldn't blame you for not being good with words. I know a lot of jerks who are like, "hey durp derp your comment comes off as racist so therefore you are racist and THEY DONT' GIVE THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT!!!!1! sometimes people is sometimes mean

The Book of Leafar says, in Chapter 13, Verse 6:

F@** 'em if they can't take a joke.

Oh, an you better not be saying anything to make me ashamed, Gark. 'Cuz I've got my belt right here.


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

RANT INCOMING!!!!


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Welcome to another exciting edition of JMD031’s rants. Today’s rant is about Doodlebug Anklebiter and his alter ego Leafar the Lost. Truth be told, this would have been a great rant in the old thread where it would have been interesting to see ol’ Leafar’s reaction. But (expletive deleted) him, let’s do this. I really don’t know much about Doodlebug except that he blindly follows any (expletive deleted) trend that happens to be the “flavor of the week”. First it was communism, then it was this whole “Don Juan” Doodlebug thing, and now it is the “Acolyte of Leafar”. I mean make up your (expletive deleted) mind already. And why would he follow (expletive deleted) Leafar the Lost. (Expletive deleted)! Now I’m worried that I won’t be able to finish this rant without violating the “Don’t be a jerk” rule”. Which is a pretty (expletive deleted) important rule by the way. Where was I? Oh yeah, Leafar the Lost. Now I don’t really have any issues with Leafar the Lost, he’s just a weird guy. The whole nemesis thing is just a bit. I saw an opportunity to attempt to be funny by being the Reed Richards to his Dr. Doom. Reed Richards, I hate that (expletive deleted) guy. I mean who does he think he is? (Expletive deleted)! I’m off topic again. Where was I? Oh yeah, I was talking about Leafar and how I don’t want to be a (expletive deleted) jerk to him and whatnot. Anyways, Leafar isn’t a bad guy, just weird. I can’t stress that enough. I mean dude is (expletive deleted) weird. I don’t mean like “kooky neighbor guy” weird, but like “start a suicide cult weird”. On second thought, I do think he is a bad guy. I mean what kind of guy starts a suicide cult? A bad guy, that’s who. Anyways, this rant is probably long enough for now.

Tune in next time for when I rant about…Followers of Leafar the Lost….(Expletive Deleted)!


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Updated list of topics I'm going to rant about:

Followers of Lanfer the Unfound
That darn draft that keeps coming in through this thread (???)
Work
Bosses
Those annoying automated telephone menu things (you know, press 1 for blah, press 2 for blech, etc...)
Customers who bug me while I'm trying to do something important, like browse the Paizo message boards
People who talk in netspeak (LOL, OMG, ROTFLMAO, etc...)
Telemarketers.
Those jackanape "debt collectors" that mistake you for some one else - as if you have any more money that the guy who shirked on the "debt" the jackanapes are now determined that YOU owe them for.
Spam that the e-mail filters fail to catch. Or spam that cleverly dodges the nets during its annual spawning runs up long Alaskan rivers. Or both.
Why Gruumash is so Awesome?
Purple People Eaters


On the one hand, Hee hee!

On the other, I am not Leafar the Loved.


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

I need to add "Pushy Monkey Kings" to the list.

Also, Doodlebug, what are you going on about with "on the one hand"?


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

You would think all of these rants that have recently started up would like enrage me or something like that. But I actually think they are pretty cool. Cause like each one has their own style but yet they are similar in their rantiness. Yes, rantiness is a word, look it up. Anyways, good job everyone and keep up the ranting.


For the record, this Monkey King doesn't "push". He prods gently with an overpowered cattle prod.


Oh yeah, that's the [expletive deleted] stuff!


JMD031 wrote:

I need to add "Pushy Monkey Kings" to the list.

Also, Doodlebug, what are you going on about with "on the one hand"?

Do you really want to know what I am doing with one hand?


1 person marked this as a favorite.

No not really ... please say no !!!!!


Any rants on this fine Friday?


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Don Juan de Doodlebug wrote:
JMD031 wrote:

I need to add "Pushy Monkey Kings" to the list.

Also, Doodlebug, what are you going on about with "on the one hand"?

Do you really want to know what I am doing with one hand?

Hmmm.....I guess I'll have to go with....no.


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
The Mad Badger wrote:
Any rants on this fine Friday?

I just gave you a rant. Rants take time. Not enough time has passed for a new rant. Be patient.


So...rants are like Shouts in Skyrim? They have a recharge time, and the more powerful the rant the longer the recharge?


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

That is correct.


I was not directing that at you my friend. I was hoping some others might take up the mantle as well. I mean you can't be the only one responsible for fine rants. Exactly as you said it take a lot out of you to do a rant. It is a labor of love people seem tot think that rants are easy ... well they are not they are hard and you have to put effort in and creativity and the like. Brattling on is a fine art and should be respected. So all of you out there you need to help out poor JMD031 and perhaps come up with a rant of your own to help him out. This is a give and take thread not just taking thread so all of you out there need to give a little and perhaps help with the rants here. Okay my own little mini rant has ended.


Me think JMD031 should make rant about peeps who refuse to pick an avatar pic.


Get out of here, troll!


STFU, you avatar-less freak!

[Tackles The Crimson Masque]


The Crimson Masque wrote:
Get out of here, troll!

Me was on Maury Povich last year... he prove troll is not me father!


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Maybe someone should rant about rants.


Good idea. Add it to your list of things to rant about.

Andoran

JMD031 wrote:
Why Gruumash is so Awesome?

This question is like the answer to the physics universe.

How do magnets work?
If you solve it, you solve THE WORLD!!!`111!!d//?!

Also I would like to request a rant about Canadians? It is totally not overdone Or anything.


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Man...I guess I should try to get out another rant soon. The lack of posts in this thread disturbs me.

Andoran

Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber

What about the lack of faith?


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
TriOmegaZero wrote:
What about the lack of faith?

I find thier lack of faith...disturbing.


And the lack of pants? Do you find that disturbing as well?

Shadow Lodge

THE PANTS CONFINE YOU! THROW OFF YOUR PANT OPPRESSORS!


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

I do not plan on wearing pants on Monday.

Andoran

But it's a Tuesday.


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

I meant next Monday.

Andoran

The joke's on you! It wasn't a Tuesday when I wrote that message, either!

Spoiler:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Andoran

ok so im am going to rnt about dogs today

dogs are stupid and smelly and they s*~$ everywhere unless theyre housetrained and even then sometimes they still do it when theyre stressed they eat anything you leave lying around and one dog jumps up on the table when youre leaving they asks for belly rubs all the f@%+ing times dogs are apain they get into water and then they shake all over you they want walkies when youre busy youre always busy dumb stupid dogs dumb dumb dumb


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Plus, they're not cats.

Andoran

also sometimes they die


2 people marked this as a favorite.

But they don't ask to drive your car or demand an allowance.

They also worship the ground you walk on. Toss your significant other and your dog in the trunk of a car for several hours and lock it up.

Who's happy to see you when you open it up?


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Gark the Goblin wrote:
The joke's on you! It wasn't a Tuesday when I wrote that message, either!** spoiler omitted **

That makes me...angry...very angry! You wouldn't like me when I'm angry...I feel the need to...to....rant!


Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Greetings fellow rant fans! This rant is about the followers of Leafar the Lost. To be honest, I don’t have a lot of (expletive deleted) hope for how well this rant will go but what the (expletive deleted), let’s do this. As I said in my last rant, Leafar is an all-around bad guy. The kind of guy who you wouldn’t mind watching on YouTube but you would not let enter your house. So one can only imagine what the people who follow such a (expletive deleted) are like. First and foremost there is Doodlebug Anklebiter who has gone so far as to make an alias called (expletive deleted) “Acolyte of Leafar the Loved”. If this guy got any further up Leafar’s (expletive deleted) he could check for polyps. Who else would follow such a lowly person? A bunch of (expletive deleted) people you’ve never heard of before, that’s who. Which basically means that the only person who follows Leafar is himself and Doodlebug. I think mainly the people who followed Mr. (expletive deleted) Leafar were people who (expletive deleted) thought they were “cool kids” by doing it. Well let me tell you something rant fans, there is nothing “cool” about being a (expletive deleted) toadie to a (expletive deleted) guy like Leafar. Wow, I just realized that this rant has managed to stay on topic for once. Good for (expletive deleted) me. Now, I think is the time to end this one and call it a night.

Join me next time when I will rant about...well I guess I’m ranting about drafts or something like that. That’s probably going to be a really (expletive deleted) one. I wouldn’t put too much stock in that one.

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