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On the bright side, I was talking with someone about my kinda messed up situation and she didn't run away screaming. She's just a friend, and we're not that close, but friends have been in short supply of late, so I'll take it as a small victory anyways. :)
I started taking with someone who is pansexual (a new term for me). I thought we were headed somewhere but turns out I was wrong. He's more interested in someone else. It's been a real challenge finding someone who might even consider talking to me knowing who I am.
I've looked at the sites that have been recommended and I'm still stuck. This is a strange, new world for me.
It's all about the small victories, Lyn. I hope things get better :)
On the bright side, I was talking with someone about my kinda messed up situation and she didn't run away screaming. She's just a friend, and we're not that close, but friends have been in short supply of late, so I'll take it as a small victory anyways. :)
It really is about the small victories, but I've also found that people don't run away screaming as often as we think they will. It's just that the specific individuals who do are often the people you don't think would have freaked out.
I started taking with someone who is pansexual (a new term for me). I thought we were headed somewhere but turns out I was wrong. He's more interested in someone else. It's been a real challenge finding someone who might even consider talking to me knowing who I am.
I've looked at the sites that have been recommended and I'm still stuck. This is a strange, new world for me.
Explore it, Bob. Enjoy your victories, learn from your defeats, and bring this new world to it's knees, acknowledging you as its master! He who dares, wins! FOR GLORY!!!!!
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In other news, I've been playing Rome Total War nonstop due to this storm..I think it's getting to me.
I was playing a bunch of Alpha Protocol. I think I'm falling for SIE.
On the bright side, I was talking with someone about my kinda messed up situation and she didn't run away screaming. She's just a friend, and we're not that close, but friends have been in short supply of late, so I'll take it as a small victory anyways. :)It really is about the small victories, but I've also found that people don't run away screaming as often as we think they will. It's just that the specific individuals who do are often the people you don't think would have freaked out.
So much this. I was so shocked. I didn't even try to make any new friends for the past year or so after I really accepted that my old friends weren't going to get past it. Having your whole support network vanish is pretty unnerving. And starting over is always hard.
Wow...
I'm one of those people that have a ton of acquaintances but very, very few actual friends. Losing them would be devastating!
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So much this. I was so shocked. I didn't even try to make any new friends for the past year or so after I really accepted that my old friends weren't going to get past it. Having your whole support network vanish is pretty unnerving. And starting over is always hard.On the bright side, I was talking with someone about my kinda messed up situation and she didn't run away screaming. She's just a friend, and we're not that close, but friends have been in short supply of late, so I'll take it as a small victory anyways. :)It really is about the small victories, but I've also found that people don't run away screaming as often as we think they will. It's just that the specific individuals who do are often the people you don't think would have freaked out.
Lynora, I do hereby swear upon the Sacred Plush Tentacle, that I will never freak out at you with respect to your sex, sexuality, or any fetishes you choose to experiment with, indulge, or take up as a lifestyle, so long as none of the aforementioned cause undue/unenjoyed physical, financial, legal or emotional harm on anyone, yourself included.
This said, I do reserve the right to be surprised at first, and to disagree respectfully should a corner case arise.
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So much this. I was so shocked. I didn't even try to make any new friends for the past year or so after I really accepted that my old friends weren't going to get past it. Having your whole support network vanish is pretty unnerving. And starting over is always hard.On the bright side, I was talking with someone about my kinda messed up situation and she didn't run away screaming. She's just a friend, and we're not that close, but friends have been in short supply of late, so I'll take it as a small victory anyways. :)It really is about the small victories, but I've also found that people don't run away screaming as often as we think they will. It's just that the specific individuals who do are often the people you don't think would have freaked out.Lynora, I do hereby swear upon the Sacred Plush Tentacle, that I will never freak out at you with respect to your sex, sexuality, or any fetishes you choose to experiment with, indulge, or take up as a lifestyle, so long as none of the aforementioned cause undue/unenjoyed physical, financial, legal or emotional harm on anyone, yourself included.
This said, I do reserve the right to be surprised at first, and to disagree respectfully should a corner case arise.
+1
So much this. I was so shocked. I didn't even try to make any new friends for the past year or so after I really accepted that my old friends weren't going to get past it. Having your whole support network vanish is pretty unnerving. And starting over is always hard.On the bright side, I was talking with someone about my kinda messed up situation and she didn't run away screaming. She's just a friend, and we're not that close, but friends have been in short supply of late, so I'll take it as a small victory anyways. :)It really is about the small victories, but I've also found that people don't run away screaming as often as we think they will. It's just that the specific individuals who do are often the people you don't think would have freaked out.Lynora, I do hereby swear upon the Sacred Plush Tentacle, that I will never freak out at you with respect to your sex, sexuality, or any fetishes you choose to experiment with, indulge, or take up as a lifestyle, so long as none of the aforementioned cause undue/unenjoyed physical, financial, legal or emotional harm on anyone, yourself included.
This said, I do reserve the right to be surprised at first, and to disagree respectfully should a corner case arise.
So, as long as there's no Firefly cosplay involved you're good? ;P
And thanks, I appreciate that.
I want to thank everyone for being supportive but I'm finding that I can't afford to be two different people and I have no idea how to be one of them so I'm going to have to put an end to my crossdressing. I can't afford it. The more I try to embrace that part of my life, the more life tells me that I can't. Any money I would spend on clothing must be spent on necessities like rent (which is going up $135). I will probably have to cut my internet service just so I can afford food.
I have hit an emotional wall again. I hit this wall harder and harder and it's getting to a point where I don't think my doctor can help. After a while, you just get tired of getting beat around by life.
Damn. Try to get with what you have at the moment until your finances get better.
Also, you might want to synergize losing weight with saving on food.
Bob, I am very sorry you are having such a difficult time right now. I know that those times of economic hardship can be extremely trying. I've been there. A few times where we wouldn't have had food if someone hadn't left groceries on our doorstep. It definitely takes an emotional toll dealing with that kind of stress consistently over time. I hope things turn around for you in the near future.
It's a bummer if you have to cancel your internet service, but don't forget you can get free internet access at the public library. Not as often as you'd like, I'm sure, but it's better than nothing. And you don't have to give up crossdressing. You already have some clothes. And take it from someone who until a couple of years ago had a clothing budget of $120 a year, you can still dress well even if you have to buy from thrift stores. Just please don't give up on being yourself.
I want to thank everyone for being supportive but I'm finding that I can't afford to be two different people and I have no idea how to be one of them so I'm going to have to put an end to my crossdressing. I can't afford it. The more I try to embrace that part of my life, the more life tells me that I can't. Any money I would spend on clothing must be spent on necessities like rent (which is going up $135). I will probably have to cut my internet service just so I can afford food.
I have hit an emotional wall again. I hit this wall harder and harder and it's getting to a point where I don't think my doctor can help. After a while, you just get tired of getting beat around by life.
I'm sorry Bob. I know things are hard right now, maybe REALLY hard, but this is why small victories like the ones you enjoyed wearing the St. Pauli Girl outfit are so important.
I don't think you should put an end to crossdressing. I think you should save it for special occasions, and alternate that with looking in thrift stores and getting things second hand.
Also, Drejk is quite right with respect to losing weight and saving money, but I know first hand how humbling that can be. American society says we can eat what we want when we want, but when you're up against a financial wall, sometimes all you can eat is crow. Lord knows I ate a lot of Top Ramen when I moved out on my own, but I found ways to make each dish my own, adding pork and veggies and other things. You CAN do this, Bob, but it's going to take some sacrifice, reorganization, and cunning. You seem to have that last in spades, along with a good support network.
Sorry to hear about the financial woes. Do as you feel you need to -- but as far as clothes go, as the others say, there are ways to get clothes cheap--and you've got some clothes already as your pictures attest. Don't feel like things are coming to an end--money is a real genuine stress factor and a HUGE one at that, but it does not have to contribute to making you feel you are unable to express who you are.
nothing you wear changes who you are. Look inside and see that, know that. Happiness is a verb.
While clothing does not necessarily "make the man" (or woman) as it were, many people do use clothing to help express themselves. In a sense, it is a form of art, like painting--a way of showing what IS inside on the out.
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We got marriage equality in Maryland! WOOOOOOOOOO!
Congrats guys, on those victories won yesterday. Hope you have continued success as you keep fighting.
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Maine and Washington also legalized it, and Minnesota failed to pass their anti-same sex-marriage amendment (still illegal though). Woooo indeed!
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Maine and Washington also legalized it, and Minnesota failed to pass their anti-same sex-marriage amendment (still illegal though). Woooo indeed!
Onya 3M [MA, ME, & MN]! and go WI for electing Tammy Baldwin!
We're still waiting to hear in WA—there are 600,000 ballots left to count, and the margin is very thin.
And the tide slowly ebbs. Congrats on making our voices heard. We are a long way from the stonewall riots. There is a quote by Max Planck: Science advances one funeral at a time. I think it has applications for the LGBT agen... I mean, equal rights movement.
Tastefully decorated castles of skulls, here we come! :)
Judy, some of us may not understand what you are saying, but I suppose that's okay.
MA, ME, and MN are the abbreviations for Massachusetts, Maine, and Minnesota. (Judy did you mean MD for Maryland or did it happen in Mass too?)
Wisconsin (WI) elected an openly lesbian senator.
WA is Washington state.
Gah, I did mean Maryland, but was insufficiently caffeinated.
Terquem, "onya" means "good for you" or "well done."
Wonderful news for our community all around.
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OK, none of my nonvirtual friends are up at this hour and I gotta tell SOMEBODY... so you guys get the gossip.
A friend of several years, to whom I've had fell designs to sell for all those years, suddenly, FINALLY, came to the realization that we might be a good couple.
We were texting back and forth, and I was indulging in my all-in-seriousness-half-in-jest innuendo-flinging. When out of nowhere (i.e., years of failure to convince him) he picks it up and starts flinging it back.
"Don't try to tempt me with a good time, it might backfire."
And the infamous, "Soon, hun."
To which I responded, "Don't. Unless you mean it. (more hand-wringing over how much I like him, etc.)"
"I mean it."
Yay!
And, crap g!$~@~mit. Now I have to manage to move back to Alaska. Sigh. Guess nothing's perfect. (Not that I mind moving back to AK, but it's gonna take a bit of financial wizardry to manage...)
Anyway, am overjoyed and more than a little stunned: never expected him to discover an interest in pairing up with me.
In addition to being cuter than a baby panda, he's one of the nicest people I know; kind, considerate, empathetic. And our first encounter ended up being a long, involved discussion about comparative religion; yay for brains and education!
So, well, life sometimes looks up in the most unexpected ways.
Yay!
HUZZAH!!!!
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I just noticed this thread and thought, "Hey LGBT gamers. I'm the G in that!"
One of my regular gaming groups is all gay guys, early 30s to mid 40s (5 of us, sometimes 6). All of us are out and mostly chill. The usual system is Pathfinder. We smoke a little, we drink a little, we play the s+~$ out of D&D. Thought it would be nice to let you know these types of gaming groups do exist (if any of you were wondering and/or feeling isolated. It happens).
I'm partnered, live in the Seattle area. Urban professional by day, brazen geek and dancing freak by night. Hi!
I live in the Seattle area and I'm trying to figure things out. I'm kinda new to all of this and I was wondering if I could send you a message Selk and see if you would be willing to help me out in person. If not, that's cool.
Selk, welcome!!!!!
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I'm getting excited about Thanksgiving. I am going to be helping my boyfriend host a Thanksgiving dinner for some friends. That means all day together cooking delicious food. The turkey is going to be my department, and I am little intimidated, but it will be an adventure if nothing else.
I'm getting excited about Thanksgiving. I am going to be helping my boyfriend host a Thanksgiving dinner for some friends. That means all day together cooking delicious food. The turkey is going to be my department, and I am little intimidated, but it will be an adventure if nothing else.
Sounds great. And don't worry too much about the turkey. It's not as hard as it might seem. I would strongly advise brining. At least that always works well for me. :)
Selk, welcome!!!!!
+1 :)
On the firday, in the middle of the pool evening sparked by a friend's friend coming for a weekend (which lead to gathering of dozen and half or so local gamers) two female friends start making out. Males present starts to cheer. Except one, who seriously claims that it's so gay that he can't look on that. Other males start looking at him suspiciously as if he grew second head.
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When women start making out, I know I have to resist the urge to cheer and gawk. I usually do this by cheering OR gawking.
<.<
>.>
What shenanigans are going on in here?
My mother finished the quilt she's been working on for four years for me today.
That's really cool. I like it.
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BL,
As another rather tall broad shouldered MTF, I thought you might like a good blog to read. I've attached the link for a specific article which is pertinent to us "big'uns". Passing vs presentable