Overheard at the Paizo office


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Paizo Employee Customer Service Representative

7 people marked this as a favorite.

Gary: Do not look a gift blood goblet in the mouth!

Silver Crusade

Katina Davis wrote:
Gary: Do not look a gift blood goblet in the mouth!

... a goblet filled with blood or a goblet made of blood?

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

11 people marked this as a favorite.
Rysky wrote:
Katina Davis wrote:
Gary: Do not look a gift blood goblet in the mouth!
... a goblet filled with blood or a goblet made of blood?

Yes.

Silver Crusade

Sara Marie wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Katina Davis wrote:
Gary: Do not look a gift blood goblet in the mouth!
... a goblet filled with blood or a goblet made of blood?
Yes.

Awesome.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

11 people marked this as a favorite.

sara marie: Amiri's Meat Hut now serving: Braised Bulette with Butter Sauce

diego: Would eat

katina: Valeros’ Very Beery Battered Fish ’n’ Chips

sara marie: Ezren's Magic Missile Melontinis are ALWAYS a hit!

Silver Crusade

... ow.

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

10 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:
katina: Valeros’ Very Beery Battered Fish ’n’ Chips

I would assume they're both Very Beery and Very Battered.

Dark Archive Software Developer

10 people marked this as a favorite.

Sara Marie: Now I feel bad for hoping you feel bad about me feeling bad that you feel bad.
Katina: That's okay, I usually feel bad for feeling bad so much.

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

4 people marked this as a favorite.

redacted: actually the trip into the toilet at PaizoCon has generated some weird effects on my phone

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

8 people marked this as a favorite.

diego: I laughed at that, but it was a laugh of despair not mirth

Silver Crusade

Sara Marie wrote:
diego: I laughed at that, but it was a laugh of despair not mirth

Katina, please don't break the Diego.

Community Manager

6 people marked this as a favorite.

Katina: It’s the unspoken rule that whoever rides shotgun has to hold two phones for full Pokemon potential.

Silver Crusade

Liz Courts wrote:
Katina: It’s the unspoken rule that whoever rides shotgun has to hold two phones for full Pokemon potential.

Yeah, they put that in place at my work too.


Liz Courts wrote:
Katina: It’s the unspoken rule that whoever rides shotgun has to hold two phones for full Pokemon potential.

Has anyone busted into the Paizo offices in pursuit of Charizard yet?

Community Manager

3 people marked this as a favorite.

Robot Chris: If that’s a reference to a book I did a report on using Cliffnotes, I don’t understand.

Dark Archive Software Developer

9 people marked this as a favorite.

Gary: Telling a programmer "There's already a library to do X" is like telling a songwriter "there's already a song about love."

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

7 people marked this as a favorite.

gary: i'm sorry, i'm going to need that comment in gif form

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

6 people marked this as a favorite.
Christopher Anthony wrote:
Gary: Telling a programmer "There's already a library to do X" is like telling a songwriter "there's already a song about love."

I totally yoinked this line from here.

Dark Archive Software Developer

4 people marked this as a favorite.

Robot Chris: and then my wardrobe got real weird

Community & Digital Content Director

6 people marked this as a favorite.

Gary wait
Gary BURGER SANTA

Paizo Employee Sales Associate

8 people marked this as a favorite.

Ashley: In mother paizo, pokénut eats you!

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

11 people marked this as a favorite.

ashley: some days you're a grenade launcher, and some days you're a machine gun.

liz: Or a flamethrower

diego: Haha!

...

sara marie: some days you're a bunker

...

sara marie: i should have had context before saying that

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

9 people marked this as a favorite.

gary: we'll totally have like 90 percent less abominatory elements by tomorrow

cort: It only takes one tentacle.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

18 people marked this as a favorite.

redacted: i have several replies to that sentence, each of which will get me sent to hr

redacted: so give me a sec to select the best one

Dark Archive Software Developer

11 people marked this as a favorite.

Katina: I'm pretty sure the founding fathers specifically called out social media
Katina: they said to use the hashtag #freespeech
Katina: #suckitkinggeorge
Robot Chris: we hold these tweets to be self-evident

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

8 people marked this as a favorite.

diego: Why is that marshmallow pooping money?

katina: DON’T QUESTION IT JUST TAKE THE MONEY

Dark Archive Software Developer

Mmm... marshmallow poop.

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

Redacted: Somebody needs to find out if that was intentional or just an Excel "mishap."

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

12 people marked this as a favorite.

redacted: I'm pooping out for luck before the 1pm meeting

...

redacted: *popping

...

redacted: *lunch

Silver Crusade

3 people marked this as a favorite.

-_-

What's with all the shitty jokes?

Edit: ... dammit Katina!

Dark Archive

So are we no moving from blaming Cosmo to blaming Katina? Is that what is hip now?

Silver Crusade

3 people marked this as a favorite.

What, no! There's nothing to blame Katina for (and even if there was you would still need to Blame Cosmo), she's just bubbly and infectious.

Technological Overlord

11 people marked this as a favorite.
Rysky wrote:
What, no! There's nothing to blame Katina for (and even if there was you would still need to Blame Cosmo), she's just bubbly and infectious.

I AM ALSO BUBBLY AND INFECTIOUS BUT NOT IN THE PLEASANT WAY.

Silver Crusade

2 people marked this as a favorite.
The Computer wrote:
Rysky wrote:
What, no! There's nothing to blame Katina for (and even if there was you would still need to Blame Cosmo), she's just bubbly and infectious.
I AM ALSO BUBBLY AND INFECTIOUS BUT NOT IN THE PLEASANT WAY.

Yep, you're the sulfur kind. Katina is more cotton candy.

Paizo Employee Customer Service Representative

6 people marked this as a favorite.
ulgulanoth wrote:
So are we no moving from blaming Cosmo to blaming Katina? Is that what is hip now?

From what I understand, I am to blame for most puns and bad jokes in general. (Robot Chris has told me that, because of my predisposition to make people laugh begrudgingly, I am destined to be a dad so that I can harness the power of all the dad jokes.)

Cosmo (and all iterations thereof) is just to blame for... pretty much everything else.

Silver Crusade

Katina Davis wrote:
ulgulanoth wrote:
So are we no moving from blaming Cosmo to blaming Katina? Is that what is hip now?

From what I understand, I am to blame for most puns and bad jokes in general. (Robot Chris has told me that, because of my predisposition to make people laugh begrudgingly, I am destined to be a dad so that I can harness the power of all the dad jokes.)

Cosmo (and all iterations thereof) is just to blame for... pretty much everything.

Do eet. Embarrass your future cotton candy spawn.

(Also ftfy)


The Computer wrote:
Rysky wrote:
What, no! There's nothing to blame Katina for (and even if there was you would still need to Blame Cosmo), she's just bubbly and infectious.
I AM ALSO BUBBLY AND INFECTIOUS BUT NOT IN THE PLEASANT WAY.

Let me guess, your running Windows 10....

As that does fit the description of your symptoms.


RHMG Animator wrote:
The Computer wrote:
Rysky wrote:
What, no! There's nothing to blame Katina for (and even if there was you would still need to Blame Cosmo), she's just bubbly and infectious.
I AM ALSO BUBBLY AND INFECTIOUS BUT NOT IN THE PLEASANT WAY.
Let me guess, your running Windows 10....

Nope. Microsoft Bob.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Manager

8 people marked this as a favorite.

katina: If you’re telling me that Cosmo is actually the mascot from a forgotten cereal brand... I could probably believe that.

Dark Archive Software Developer

4 people marked this as a favorite.

Robot Chris: this is almost like the day I discovered you could subscribe to beef jerky

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:
katina: If you’re telling me that Cosmo is actually the mascot from a forgotten cereal brand... I could probably believe that.

Was it King Vitaman?

No—wait... I bet it was Sugar Krinkles!


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Vic Wertz wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
katina: If you’re telling me that Cosmo is actually the mascot from a forgotten cereal brand... I could probably believe that.

Was it King Vitaman?

No—wait... I bet it was Sugar Krinkles!

I would go with the second one as well.

...

Wait, was the FallOut series inspired by something Cosmo did?


Vic Wertz wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
katina: If you’re telling me that Cosmo is actually the mascot from a forgotten cereal brand... I could probably believe that.

Was it King Vitaman?

No—wait... I bet it was Sugar Krinkles!

Creapy commercial featuring Krinkles the Clown.


2 people marked this as a favorite.

I remember King Vitamin cereal. You could let it soak in milk for hours, and it would still be crunchy enough to cut the insides of your cheek.

Delicious.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
gran rey de los mono wrote:

I remember King Vitamin cereal. You could let it soak in milk for hours, and it would still be crunchy enough to cut the insides of your cheek.

Delicious.

I thought that was Captain Crunch.


Treppa wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:

I remember King Vitamin cereal. You could let it soak in milk for hours, and it would still be crunchy enough to cut the insides of your cheek.

Delicious.

I thought that was Captain Crunch.

Nah. Captain Crunch will eventually go soggy. Eventually.


gran rey de los mono wrote:
Treppa wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:

I remember King Vitamin cereal. You could let it soak in milk for hours, and it would still be crunchy enough to cut the insides of your cheek.

Delicious.

I thought that was Captain Crunch.
Nah. Captain Crunch will eventually go soggy. Eventually.

5 minutes... and in 5 more minutes, the old granny can eat them even without her dentures.


Nutcase Entertainment wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
Treppa wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:

I remember King Vitamin cereal. You could let it soak in milk for hours, and it would still be crunchy enough to cut the insides of your cheek.

Delicious.

I thought that was Captain Crunch.
Nah. Captain Crunch will eventually go soggy. Eventually.
5 minutes... and in 5 more minutes, the old granny can eat them even without her dentures.

Depends on how tough your gums are. Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch is best for gumming.


SLAaDOS wrote:
RHMG Animator wrote:
The Computer wrote:
Rysky wrote:
What, no! There's nothing to blame Katina for (and even if there was you would still need to Blame Cosmo), she's just bubbly and infectious.
I AM ALSO BUBBLY AND INFECTIOUS BUT NOT IN THE PLEASANT WAY.
Let me guess, your running Windows 10....
Nope. Microsoft Bob.

Both come from the same evil empire, so it's not that big of a difference.

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