"Elvis of Golarion" debate thread

[Vic Wertz]

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[Mairkurion {tm}]

Vic Wertz wrote:

Begin.

Ridiculous. Vic Wertz looks nothing like Elvis.

[Ambrosia Slaad]

Mairkurion {tm} wrote:

Vic Wertz wrote:

Begin.

Ridiculous. Vic Wertz looks nothing like Elvis.

Yeah, more like a young Jim Morrison.

Edit: Wait! Elvis Presley, Elvis Costello, Elvis the hurricane, or Elvis the asteroid?

[Tarren Dei]

Blue Suede Shoes are underpowered. Barely worth statting up. I mean, even when my PC wears them, you can still knock him down, step in his face, slander his name all over the place, burn his house, steal his car, and drink his liquor from an old fruitjar. Really, what's the point?

[Shadowborn]

King Elvis is, of course, still alive. He and Aroden faked their deaths. I'd tell you where they are and what they're doing, but I'd risk a visit from the Red Mantis. It's all very hush-hush.

[Mikaze]

Elvis' mechanical bonuses against mummies are woefully underpar as he's written now.

I'm still reading through Ultimate Magic though. Hopefully the Fat Elvis archetype takes care of that issue.

[TriOmegaZero]

*doubletake*

[Ambrosia Slaad]

AH-HA! Vic is secretly testing the waters for new PC races! I think a race of Elvii clones could be awesome!

But I'd really prefer to see Ponies of Golarion first. I can't wait to bring the smackdown with subpoenas and witness depositions with the Unfrozen Pony Lawyer alt-Inquistor class.

[Urizen]

I'm going to make an Alchemist Bloatmage gestalt.

[Mikaze]

I was fine with the Elvii clone race as they were before they went with that standardized origin that has them all being descended from the people of Lost Vegash.

[Lord Fyre]

Shadowborn wrote:

King Elvis is, of course, still alive. He and Aroden faked their deaths. I'd tell you where they are and what they're doing, but I'd risk a visit from the Red Mantis. It's all very hush-hush.

Wait a minute ...

Have Elvis and Aroden ever been seen together?

... just sayin'

[Ambrosia Slaad]

Mikaze wrote:

I was fine with the Elvii clone race as they were before they went with that standardized origin that has them all being descended from the people of Lost Vegash.

I'd heard that they couldn't get a complete DNA sample of the Elvis Prime, so they had to splice in Bruce Campbell DNA for a complete sequence.

[Shifty]

They were so much better in 'X' edition.

[Gwenn Reece]

Is Elvis OGL compatible?

[Gwenn Reece]

Urizen wrote:

I'm going to make an Alchemist Bloatmage gestalt.

To steal a line from a recent episode of Castle: "He's dropped more pills than a three fingered pharmacist."

[Studpuffin]

Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

Mikaze wrote:

I was fine with the Elvii clone race as they were before they went with that standardized origin that has them all being descended from the people of Lost Vegash.

I'd heard that they couldn't get a complete DNA sample of the Elvis Prime, so they had to splice in Bruce Campbell DNA for a complete sequence.

Life will find a way.

[Mikaze]

Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

I'd heard that they couldn't get a complete DNA sample of the Elvis Prime, so they had to splice in Bruce Campbell DNA for a complete sequence.

Okay that's LA +2 at least.

[feytharn]

There is no way, Elvis would keep be that special in Golarion. Just look at all the other Bards! They could simply gang up and take him down easily. Any other way is just simple Elvisloving fanboyism!

[Ambrosia Slaad]

feytharn wrote:

There is no way, Elvis would keep be that special in Golarion. Just look at all the other Bards! They could simply gang up and take him down easily. Any other way is just simple Elvisloving fanboyism!

Ooooo, that's a Flagging for Blasphemy!

Also, celery tastes nothing like a Grilled Peanut Butter, Bacon, and Banana Sandwich.

[Xabulba]

feytharn wrote:

There is no way, Elvis would keep be that special in Golarion. Just look at all the other Bards! They could simply gang up and take him down easily. Any other way is just simple Elvisloving fanboyism!

Elvis is a god and the King of bards. All the bards prey to him every morning for inspiration. There is however a schism between the followers of the "Young Elvis" and the "Fat Elvis"

[Aberzombie]

So when are we going to see the Flying Elvis (Utah Chapter) prestige class?

[Xabulba]

The plural of Elvis is Elvi, i.e. The Flying Elvi.

[Celestial Healer]

Elvis is hiding in Alkenstar. That's where he got the gun to shoot his scrying mirror.

[yellowdingo]

They sacrifice children who are not smart enough to be elves?
They drop the Ugly ones on Human Doorsteps?

[Xabulba]

I wish this could be my Avatar.

[Mairkurion {tm}]

Celestial Healer wrote:

Elvis is hiding in Alkenstar. That's where he got the gun to shoot his scrying mirror.

CH: How could you break our sacred oath and betray the King and the B.O.T.C.O.B.?

[Celestial Healer]

Mairkurion {tm} wrote:

Celestial Healer wrote:

Elvis is hiding in Alkenstar. That's where he got the gun to shoot his scrying mirror.

CH: How could you break our sacred oath and betray the King and the B.O.T.C.O.B.?

I'll bite... BOTCOB?

[Mairkurion {tm}]

Celestial Healer wrote:

Mairkurion {tm} wrote:

Celestial Healer wrote:

Elvis is hiding in Alkenstar. That's where he got the gun to shoot his scrying mirror.

CH: How could you break our sacred oath and betray the King and the B.O.T.C.O.B.?

I'll bite... BOTCOB?

Brotherhood of Takin' Care of Business. Elvis' Fellowship of Loyal Knights.

[Aberzombie]

The warden threw a party in the county jail
The prison band was there and they began to wail
The band was jumpin' and the joint began to swing
You should've heard those knocked out jailbirds sing

Let's rock
Everybody, let's rock
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock

Spider Murphy played the tenor saxophone
Little Joe was blowin' on the slide trombone
The drummer boy from Illinois went crash, boom, bang
The whole rhythm section was a purple gang

Let's rock
Everybody, let's rock
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock

Number 47 said to number 3
"You're the cutest jailbird I ever did see
I sure would be delighted with your company
Come on and do the Jailhouse Rock with me"

Let's rock
Everybody, let's rock
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock, Rock, Rock

Sad Sack was sittin' on a block of stone
Way over in the corner weepin' all alone
The warden said, "Hey, buddy, don't you be no square
If you can't find a partner use a wooden chair"

Let's rock
Everybody, let's rock
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock

Shifty Henry said to Bugs, "For Heaven's sake
No one's lookin', now's the chance to make a break"
Bugsy turned to Shifty and he said, "Nix nix
I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks"

Let's rock
Everybody, let's rock
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock

Dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock, dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock
Dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock, dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock
Dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock, dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock
Dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock

[golem101]

Mikaze wrote:

Elvis' mechanical bonuses against mummies are woefully underpar as he's written now.

I'm still reading through Ultimate Magic though. Hopefully the Fat Elvis archetype takes care of that issue.

Min-maxer.

[Crimson Jester]

when did we get to Vagas?

[Xabulba]

Crimson Jester wrote:

when did we get to Vagas?

Vegas is a state of mind, learn to channel Fat Elvis and you will always be in Vegas.

[Doodlebug Anklebiter]

Aberzombie wrote:

Number 47 said to number 3
"You're the cutest jailbird I ever did see
I sure would be delighted with your company
Come on and do the Jailhouse Rock with me"

In what prison was this supposed to take place?

Decades before Oz, Lieber and Stoller showed us the hot and steamy side of lockdown after hours.

[Mac Boyce]

I knew he wasn't dead...he just went home.