Granted, you are dead, and gone forever. Goodbye!
I wish that everyone else in North America would start calling what we currently call soccer football and call the sport they call football something more fitting. Without the rest of the changing.
Granted but your football (soccer) is called football but is banned for all of eternity. Our football is changed to REAL FOOTBALL and is now celebrated across the universe as everyone's new favorite sport and is celebrated not only across the universe but on several planes of existence as well.
Granted! Things get kind of messy when the first Queh-Queh team starts playing. They are six-dimensional creatures. Merely looking at them is enough to make a human brain wither and die. Congratulations, since everyone is watching, you just killed off the human species.
I wish American Football would be called Weakling Rugby.
Granted! However, non-Weakling Rugby suddenly loses popularity as a sport leaving Weakling Rugby the only kind of Rugby (or Football) left on the planet.
I wish that I could find the wherewithal to stop procrastinating and get back to my research.
Granted, but first you take all the poser sports (football aka weakling rugby That's what it is too :P, Cricket 'cause baseball is so much more awesome, and golf) and destroy them making way for the real sports
BOOM-shaka-laka, it's been done, everything has made way for chess, volleyball & horse jumping.
Just for the cricket, i know of a fun story concerning that "weakling rugby
Spoiler:
I've worked 3 summers in entertainment and had spoken with this certain british, irish even maybe, the guy was apparently a rugby player.
He and his team went abroad to the USA one time on vacation, where they met an USA football team. The americans challenged the rubgy squad to a game.
On USA style, it was a close loss for the UK, whom followed by "loose this junk", challenged the americans to a "good old rugby" match.
Ownage by the brits, the americans were complaining it was too rough. ^^
Booyah!!
I wish the matches and clubs wouldn't end up fixed.
Granted but everything else is. You are now told what to work, who to marry, where you live, what you drive, and how to spend your little income among other things. You can vote but the same people always get elected or reelected.
Granted, no one thinks you are wealthy as we don't use conch shells as currency anymore.
I wish that the fake rapper Drake would die and never speak again
Granted but you are locked in a closet with her for eternity so you two can cuddle and make out. And although she is not speaking, you are able to hear her thoughts as if she was speaking and singing.
We wish to have video showing exactly when Cr500cricket snaps and looses it.
Granted! Unfortunately, a pig with two slices of bread stuck to it has gone to sleep in front of your TV and refuses to move.
I wish that the next poster's wish would be granted to the spirit and letter of their wish, provided they corrupt this wish sufficiently that it is twisted beyond recognition.
Granted, however the wisher will be unable to wish, in spirit, letter or any other form of communication, that is understandable by any being in existance, real or otherwise. This includes but not limited to, ancient wishing methods (upon a star, blowing out birthday candles, etc), conversing unintentially with wish-granting beings (be it angel, devil, demon, geni or god etc), or even casting the spell themselves (be it through knowledge or item).
That is until, 2 seconds before the end of all time, when they'll be able wish as per the spell, with the added component, their soul (which will be used to power the lowest level of the abyss, and their torment).
I . . . I . . supposted do something, just don't know what.
Can someone take my place?
Granted, Willy Wonka gives you a jar full of candy that didn't make it past safety regulations. As such, you will experience agonizing pains, hallucinations, internal issues and lots of nasty stuff.
I wish spinach actually DID make your muscular like a trained athlete.
Granted! But he is now immune to any attack you can make and constantly buzzes in your ear.
I wish to be an intelligent vampire who is not in sunlight that can still digest food so I can be immune to poisons and death effects and eat my candy.
Granted!
Your new CR comes from stacking template after template, and now your celestial half-celestial part is at war with your fiendish half-fiend part, while your half-dragon part laughs and your vampiric and lich parts duke it out.
I wish that my mini-gun that launches nukes had a range greater then its blast radius.
granted you are now reincarnated as a cricket that thru multiple CR stacking has made it into a CR 500 monstrosity that is at internal war with itself
granted! you learned the grapple rules first hand by the repeated sparring matches with the whole UFC lineup , WWE, and finally enduring 10,000 punches from a young mike Tyson. unfortunately it has left you in a comatose state.