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Corrupt the Wish

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3,751 to 3,800 of 3,982 << first < prev | 70 | 71 | 72 | 73 | 74 | 75 | 76 | 77 | 78 | 79 | 80 | next > last >>


You now have moderator privileges on a Chamicuro website. However you find out that only two speakers of that language still exist on the earth, and you are not one of them ... so their is not much you can do with it.

I wish it would stop raining.

1 person marked this as a favorite.


All rain on the planet has stopped. Most vegetation is dead before the year's end and oxygen production has basically come to a halt. I hope you don't like breathing.

I wish my group would play Wrath of the Righteous.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! They had such a great time playing WotR without you that they've decided to kick you out of the group.

I wish I had some fruit.

Granted! All the discarded rotten fruit from all the world is teleported to your house at once. You are now buried alive in rotting fruit!

I wish I had some fresh fruit and to not be buried alive in it. Best, not be buried in it at all.

Granted. You have a pumpkin. You cannot be buried by it because it's not on the outside!

I wish I had someone to play with who didn't start to cry two minutes in.

Granted! Everyone you play with is already crying.

I wish for lazy days and crazy nights.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! You've been turned into a Vampire. A Malkavian vampire.

I wish the toilet paper was able to change itself.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted, it shapeshifts into a toilet paper that looks smooth, but feels like sandpaper when used.

I wish war and religious fanaticism worldwide would be a thing of the past. :/

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted without doing nothing. It is a thing of the past, present and probably future.

I wish my wording wasn't so clunky.

Clunky, clunky, Tacticslion taught me a new word and I love it! Clunky!

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Granted! your wording is not so clunky. It's even clunkier!

I wish someone casts "From Stone to Flesh" on me. The next poster... has forgotten me!

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! I have forgotten you (and you are still Stone).

I wish for a fast car!

Granted! A fast car comes from nowhere and runs over you!

I wish the undead have the same civil rights as the living.

Grand Lodge

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Your wish is granted. Good luck.

I wish for world peace!

GranTED, I WiLL EstABLish WorLD pEAce By RemovINg HumANitY fROm The MaiN PictURe, And By CloNINg the BESt HumANs.


Grand Lodge

Very well, hail Friend Computer!
*nukes alpha complex*

I wish that alpha complex would come back...

Granted, lots of zombie constructs.

I wish for an artifact that turns statues into constructs with a touch. (Then the queen will be a stone golem)



Liberty's Edge

Granted! A horse heart. You have to eat it raw to prove you are a queen. And you don't have a real mouth of digestive system as you are a golem.

I wish for a world with no kings or queens.

Granted! You are responsible for the death of Freddy Mercury.

I wish to break free.

Grand Lodge

Granted! You break free out of the next window you lean against and plummet to your death.

I wish for a pizza.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! You have a pizza. The cheese is so hot it burns you down to your skull. But still, it's tasty!

I wish the earth had at least two moons.

Thus causing extremely low tides, and humongous tidal waves!! This throws the delicate design of the earth's oceans into turbulence, killing about half of the oceanic life, and preventing travel by the ocean, and removing all of the coastal towns and cities in the world.

I wish for the heart of Gold aka the improbability drive

Granted. It appears before you in a flash of light, immediately followed by Olympus Mons, lately (and improbably) transported to Golarion from Mars.

It rests on top of you.

JTDV wrote:
Granted! Everyone you play with is already crying.

Nice... :rubs thighs:

I wish I had more servants to collect the tears of my playmates.

Okay, but they are all imaginary.

I wish for Westwood studios to be resurrected, independant from Electronic Arts, and make an awesome Command & Conquer: Red Alert 4.

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Card Game, Class Deck Subscriber

But you end up playing non stop until you lose your job, get the power shut off, and get kicked out of your apartment. So you cannot play anymore.

I wish people would get a clue.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

One clue; 42
No one knows what it means, so it does not change anything.

I wish food cost less.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! Food is now free. It's all soylent green. Enjoy!

I wish dolphins did have the answer! (At least they're thankful for the fish)

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Card Game, Class Deck Subscriber

But now they demand more than fish if you want it.

I wish cheap, economical spaceflight really did exist.

They do! But as is discussed in the books, everyone knows that the answer is 42, so this in turn changes nothing...

I wish for eternal life.

Grand Lodge

Granted! You gain eternal life and as a gift, knowledge of your future. For whatever you shall gain while alive on this planet, when it inevitably ends, you will live on, alone. That is, until one day when our sun goes nova and you are cooked at temperatures no material other than atomic hydrogen and helium were made to survive...and yet you will live on in anguish. Then you will spend countless millennia suffocating and freezing as your body drifts through the void of space while your organs implode, and yet you will live on.


I still wish I had a pizza :(

Sure thing, but it's made of plastic, and thus inedible.

I wish to have a free car, no yearly taxes attached.

Granted! But it's so low quality that you have to pay expensive reparations at least twice per month, pollutes a lot and wastes a lot of fuel.

I wish all the wished of the good willed people in the world became true.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! All good willed people want is just to their loved ones back. Oh and they also just want to win the lottery so they can help others...suddenly hundreds of millions of formerly dead people appear. At the same time the lottery crashes as everyone wins! People are angry for that the lottery was gamed. People who were dead and at peace are now confused, scared, and angry. Who's going to feed all these new people? Economic collapse! Chaos! Riots! Madness!

I wish to get off work early.

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Card Game, Class Deck Subscriber

Your fired. No need to ever come back.

I wish my last wish hadn't been ignored.

Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Deluxe Comics Subscriber; Pathfinder Legends Subscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

Granted. Travel into space is now cheap and easy - spacecraft heading into deep space can be found on any street corner. Surviving in space or returning to earth - well that's another story.

I wish to know what question 42 is the answer to.

Granted! Millions and millions of questions with this answer come to your mind, causing an awful headache for 42 hours.

I wish all the evil aligned leaders on Earth to be gone.

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Granted! Now I, the former second-in command of my incompetent evil leader, am in charge. Things are gonna change and not for better.

I wish for a good rare steak.

Granted! You ARE a good rare steak. First quality flesh, ready to be fed to my minions.

I wish I had my minions back.

Granted! They have come back to their former selves and they are your minions no longer.

I wish for Sylvyana the Ghoul Queen to be redeemed.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Redeemed means to buy back, so I will pay for her to be plane shifted back from the Shadow plane.
What, you meant the other type of redeemed. No refunds.

I wish I had remembered to pack a lunch today.

Granted! You remembered. But you forgot to take it with you after packing it.

I wish I finished the picture I'm coloring.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! Your psychotherapist will now interpret it:

"Hmmmm. Not good, not good at all. Judy, get me the police. Stat!"

I wish I could hover and look down over all the earth.

Granted. However, in space, nobody can hear you suffocate and freeze-dry.

I wish I could show the healers that have recently taken up residence my "workroom".

Granted, said puppets of healers are put on public display, or would be, were it not for not getting past censor control.

I wish for airline companies to do better at Customer Service.

Granted! Now they do so well, absolutely nothing other than clothing may be boarded on the plane. This includes people...

I wish for GoatToucher to be purified.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted! He has been distilled and now appears in liquid form.

I wish for a bacon triple cheeseburger and I'd like fries with that.

Granted!! The entire burger, other than the bacon, is made of cheese. Have fun.

I wish for more MST3K episodes.

Granted. There are now 3K more episodes of Mystery Science Theater. Unfortunately, they are all just rehashing the Manos Hands of Fate episode.

I wish roller skates would come back in style!

Granted! On your short way to the local supermarket, you get hit thrice by reckless skaters.

I wish that I don't have to work anymore!

Sovereign Court

Pathfinder Card Game, Class Deck Subscriber

You're dead.

I wish to a female Jin would fall in love with me.

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