Last one to post wins

[GoatToucher]

Pulg wrote:

H'mm. So that's bleach, then, is it? Coming out of there?

Yes... :eyes dart around for a moment: bleach...

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

It really is bleach, just not the bleach people are familiar with, here read it for yourself.

*Hands a bleach bottle to Pulg, who then reads (thankfully to himself) the chemical mixture. And watches him spontaneously combust.*

Well, THAT was to be expected. I'm just going to leave him here, he'll be fine, Pulg always manages to not die.

[Uncle Teddy]

I always pictured Pulg similar to Kenny from South Park - he dies then comes back the next day, alive and well.

[Pulg]

*We see tiny black flakes of ex-Pulg float down all around us, then behold! Before our eyes, the Miracle of Evolution unfolds, as the inert fragments of carbon form a rich soup of amino acids. Then, single-celled Pulgs emerge, then invertiPulgs, then the pinnacle of hairy creation stands before us, as magnificently dandruffed as he was the day before!*

I can think of better ways to spend a Tuesday, to be bluntly honest.

[Vidmaster7]

Pulg the hair that wouldn't go away.

[Sissyl]

Well, trusty Vidmaster7, we have driven off the kestrelot. Time to go back into the ball.

*uses her eidolon ball to unsummon Vid*

Let's continue along route 48 toward FaWTL6 city gym... and eidolon center. That will be nice, won't it?

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

A WILD CLOSET APPEARS!

[Vidmaster7]

*from inside the ball*

Eh its a living.

[GoatToucher]

A Small Girl used CLOSE LATCH on Closet.

It's SUPER EFFECTIVE!

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

A surgeon used OPERATION! It hits all targets, CRITICAL HITS, all stats have been cleared! Everyone has been rendered brain-dead.

[Very_Simple_Commoner]

That is sure weird then. it dun seem ta do anythin to me.

[That kid from that region]

Don't need a brain to use Serene Grace. Enjoy your under 50% chance to do anything!

I guess I have a mono-flying team?

[The Fiend Fantastic]

(Looks around)

Still nothing new...

[JTDII]

...

[Vidmaster7]

hmm.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Consults a star chart.*

It says here that whoever secures the win ten posts after mine will have it for a whole week until they unexpectedly explode. But fret not, for there is a way out, in order to avoid getting exploded you must willingly get yourself shanked by a goblin (or another goblin if you happen to be one yourself) within three days of your victorious post.

[Pulg]

Is that a star chart, or has Vid just sneezed on a sheet of black paper?

[Sissyl]

My trusty eidolon didn't do it. He is in his eidolon ball.

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

*starts wandering around dressed like a baseball stadium peanuts vendor*

BALD CAPS! GETCHA NOVELTY BALD CAPS! GETCHA BALD CAPS HEEEYAH!!!

[Vidmaster7]

*bangs on inside of ball till it opens*

Eh least she "lets" me out at night.

[Uncle Teddy]

Yo, I'll take a bald cap.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

And we've just gone past the half way point (with this post being the sixth after my previous post) who'll be the one to explode (or get shanked)? In the meantime, I'll take ten bald caps, I recently captured ten brave adventurers and I can't kill them unless I dress them as monks first.

[Pulg]

Is an all-body bald cap available?

[Uncle Teddy]

Ask GoatToucher - if anyone would have that I think he would.

[GoatToucher]

Well, there are several ways to go about it. We could engage in a full body shave (always fun), a dip in a tank of depilatory ointment (also nice), there is always a full body wax/genital electrocution package (they go together better than you'd think), and lastly, we could cast your body in latex and craft a "bald suit". This would not breathe, would be almost unbearably hot, and produce the foulest aromas the humanoid body is capable of.

I highly recommend it.

[The Game Hamster]

The Fiend Fantastic wrote:

(Looks around)

Still nothing new...

I'don't know about that... I'm back, so, a little new? a little old? eh, who cares?

[Vidmaster7]

I lost count.

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

*begins tossing out bald caps*

One for Uncle Teddy...*THWIIIP!*

One - no, count 'em, TEN! - for the Count...*THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!*

One for Pulg - sorry, these're all I got...*THWIIIP!*

One for The Game Hamster...*flop*

One for Grandpa Wonderbra...*forms mini-black-hole-of-baldness*

One for Sissyl...*THWIIIIII-IMPAAAAALE!*

[Sissyl]

Dammit!

*tries to wrest the bald cap away from her headspikes*

*struggles*

*gives up*

I guess it can stay there for now.

[Vidmaster7]

Just paint it blue. it should blend in.

[Sissyl]

I AM NOT A KATAMARI!!!

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

One Mt. Fuji for Sissyl...*THWUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMP!!!!!*

*peeks In vendor's tray*

Huh. That was the last one I had.

[Vidmaster7]

Keep working at it. You'll get their some day.

[Laser Clown of the 34th Century]

*jetpacks past in a flurry of laser flashes, leaving behind the word "THERE" xenon-glow-scorched into the back of Vidmaster7's head*

[space master7]

Its OK I got this *breaks out his force field generator*

[Laser Clown of the 34th Century]

*breaks out tunneling quanta-laser, shooting right past force field (as well producing a finer resulting etching, with mysterious high-energy sparkles!)*

[Chuck Les, Son of Jokey]

I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:

*begins tossing out bald caps*

One for Uncle Teddy...*THWIIIP!*

One - no, count 'em, TEN! - for the Count...*THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!THWIP!*

One for Pulg - sorry, these're all I got...*THWIIIP!*

One for The Game Hamster...*flop*

One for Grandpa Wonderbra...*forms mini-black-hole-of-baldness*

One for Sissyl...*THWIIIIII-IMPAAAAALE!*

One for me too? Why, thankya! Alopecia-te it very much!

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Oh, thank you ever so much, Laser Clown of the 34th Century!!!

But wait! If you're here, and Laser Clown was just here too, then who...how did...?!?:

I'll never tell.

..........................................

*suddenly looks over, sees Chuck Les*

YOU get nothing! YOU LOSE! Good DAY, sir!

[Vidmaster7]

odd night.

[Uncle Teddy]

* looks at bald cap *

Perfect! That'll learn them dang tribbles.

* walks off, laughing evilly *

[The Game Hamster]

*Changes bald cap into a ball cap, and begins rolling it around on the floor*
Heh.
puns...

[Lord President Beans]

I prefer beans.

[Grandpa Wonderbra]

What sort of beans? I'm certain we can find something to your liking at the banquet table.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

Please, whatever you do, keep him away from me! I just can't stand the SMELL! And no, I'm not talking about the "aftershocks" you get from eating beans or even the odour of the beans themselves (mind you, both are quite unpleasant) it's the fact that the Lord President wears cheap aftershave and THAT'S the odour I can't stand (not the aftershave, the cheapness).

*Consults the star chart again before putting it in the recycling bin.*

And according to the chart, The Game Hamster is the person who is destined to either explode or get shanked by a goblin.

[Comte de Malodor]

Whose destiny is it to be spanked thoroughly with a frogman's flipper?

Asking for a friend, you see.

[Grandpa Wonderbra]

* peers into the mini-black-hole-of-baldness *

I believe it is someone by the name of Seymour Skinner, a grade-school principal it seems.

[GoatToucher]

Isn't anyone going to volunteer for the full body wax/genital electrocution package?!?

[The Game Hamster]

Count Reiner Heydrich wrote:

Please, whatever you do, keep him away from me! I just can't stand the SMELL! And no, I'm not talking about the "aftershocks" you get from eating beans or even the odour of the beans themselves (mind you, both are quite unpleasant) it's the fact that the Lord President wears cheap aftershave and THAT'S the odour I can't stand (not the aftershave, the cheapness).

*Consults the star chart again before putting it in the recycling bin.*

And according to the chart, The Game Hamster is the person who is destined to either explode or get shanked by a goblin.

EXPLODE? SHANKED BY A GOBLIN!

how Preposterous.
Absurd.
The highest degree of inanity!
*Is stabbed by a hundred goblins, while simultaneously blowing into a million pieces*
*Reforms a minute later*
Huh.
I guess it really happened...

[Pulg]

GoatToucher wrote:

Isn't anyone going to volunteer for the full body wax/genital electrocution package?!?

I already have wax genitals, so I think it might be unnecessary.

However, they're surplus to requirements, thanks to my lovely new plantain, so if you want to electrocute them, go ahead.

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Pulg wrote:

I already have wax genitals, so I think it might be unnecessary.

However, they're surplus to requirements, thanks to my lovely new plantain, so if you want to electrocute them, go ahead.

OR you could use them for the shamash in a dirty Hannukah flick!