I did not know nipples could grow there...
The next poster has an obsession with shoes three sizes to small.
Quite, i order them in certain sizes, but they end up delivered 3 sizes too small. It's turned into an obsession to quick-check those boxes for the correct size.
The next poster works as a shoe salesman, has a wife and 2 kids and a dog.
I sell only the best shoes to the richest clients. And the dog is a Corgi.
The next poster decided to give up fame and fortune to pursue their real dream... To become an octopus.
I was your first customer at your new Japanese Cajun fusion restaurant. I got food poisoning. Your restaurant was short lived.
The next poster will give me all their pathfinder books, free of charge.
He certainly does!
The next poster is a fan of nude carpentry, and can tell you a story about an unfortunate mishap with a hammer and a body piercing.
What can i say, that girl looked beautiful doing carpentry in the nude. When she dropped the hammer and bent over to grab it, i saw a piercing in a......'special' spot.
The next poster is preparing the assassination of Justin Bieber, and will descibe the ingenius plan.
I poop on peoples lawns
The next poster creates a wild story from my "clue"
He poops on people's lawns.
The next poster has a phobia of posting on message boards.
Last time I sneezed a talking woodchuck popped out.
The next poster is an actual poster. In fact, the next poster is the poster Harrison Ford used in Shaw shank redemption.
Totally meant Tim Robins... Dunno where I got Harrison Ford from.
I know your pain. I get Nick Nolte and Gary Busey mixed up all the time.
The Next poster will now point out at least 5 easy ways to tell these two men apart.
1. gigantic Horse Teeth 2. The roles (pshycotic cop vs. pshyco ex vet)
3. Celebrity Rehab 4. The Hulk 5. The family guy
The next poster will get the clown out from under their bed and back into the closet.
That was easy, i merely pluck the kid from the bed and put him into the closet. The clown under the bed joins the kid and the other clown in the closet.
closetCase closed, locked and forgotten.
The next poster has rigged the next twilight spinoff's set with sabotaging traps of a very unusual design, sharing gladly with us what they will do.
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Well, if you must know mortals, I have replaced the coffins with iron maidens (and I made sure that the spikes were placed in specific spots, so that the occupant feels intense pain but doesn't die), for scenes that involve a character jumping I have placed spring loaded clubs with motion sensors (so when the character is over the trap, the club will spring out hit the poor sap either in the stomach - if it's a girl - or the groin if it's a dude), the floodlights have been rigged to contain water (so now, they will be true to the name), I swapped the camera film for machine gun ammo (the director is gonna wish he never said 'roll it') and finally (speaking of the director) I replaced his chair with a mimic that hasn't eaten in days. And should any of that fail, I'll just send in Dominik to have a little fun.
The next poster found my traps made the Twilight spinoff much more entertaining and thinks that more movies could use my 'magic' touch.
Yes please I beg of you: kill all of the useless movie stars, they drag society down.
The next poster shall rig other movies in similar manners.
All those crappy abominations they call remakes.
Those sudden fires and explosion...oh and the sudden volcano eruption?
It was yours truly, saving the world.
The next poster has a flying house and has seen the panic at those scenes.
I have. The carnage and despair was... invigorating.
The next poster has a plot to dispose of history's greatest monster: Michael Bay
Okay. I am going to lure him into an ambush. I am going to make an anonymous phonecall and tell him that he could get the movie rights for... ummm... Microsoft Word or something equally exciting... for fifty bucks... only he has to come pick up the paper at an oil platform surrounded by twelve supertankers. When he arrives, the helicopter is shot in the rear stabilizer, crashing into the platform but not killing him. He goes unconscious, so he gets a pair of VR glasses showing him a shaky-cam of his surroundings. When he wakes up, he has to run from a bunch of armed killers all over the ships and platform, with all of it detnonating, always in slow-motion and throwing him around. Finally, all of it gets blown up by a nuke.
The next poster protests!
I protest because I wanted to kill him for what he did to transformers!
The next poster is the poster after that's biological parent
Am I? Well, I -do- get around...
The next poster is reluctant to post, due to what it implies.
I never raised that boy to touch goats......
The next poster got GoatToucher touching goats.
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Alas, it's true! The church actively encourages followers to spread the joy of pain and mutilation to all of the unenlightened that you live with. In the case of GoatToucher, he lived on a goat farm (with the world record for the most goats - over 9000!) So naturally, he was gonna touch goats (which is fine as long as they are converted to the faith) but he took to far (and not just with the goats!) so he had to be 'dishonourably discharged'. Darn shame, GoatToucher had a lot of promise.
The next poster is GoatToucher's replacement as the high priest of my church in Nidal. Who, thankfully, has managed to be an improvement.
YES IT IS I! THE GOD LIKE ODDITY TOTALY NOT INFILTRATING YOUR CHURCH. OH NO I WOULD NEVER DO THAT!
The next poster is also infiltrating the church.
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Absolutely. We have Death mints, Tourniquet thins, Mutilation wafers, Sesame pains, and a dozen other cookies. Guaranteed to be a memorable culinary experience!
The next poster has to decide where the profit from the cookies goes.
The profits go to the pain ward at the local hospital so than can purchase more lemon juice soaked, salt encrusted bandages. A good time was has had by all.
The next poster expresses affection for another in a very unusual way and is going to tell us all about it. Let's watch.....
I like to lick my girlfriends nose. It grosses her out....
The next poster has ringworm in an unfortunate place.
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Wouldja believe...my ring finger? If I ever try to wear rings on that hand, the darned worm keeps eating them. It sucks!
The next poster would know what to do if the stupidest "teacher" in a school, who happened to be a veteran and seemed convinced that made them Hot S**% Who Could Do No Wrong(TM), invited a military recruiter there (against school rules), to pull students out of class to pitch to them and publicly bully and humiliate the one student who both knew the facts about the bogus war their country had just launched and dared to confront them about it.
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Have him cleaned and brought to my tent, that I may "know" him.
The next poster once ate a two gallon can of chocolate pudding in one sitting, and will describe the gastrointestinal aftermath in six words.
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GoatToucher is currently my best choice for Uncle Fester. Sissyl for Wednesday Addams.
The next poster thinks only in colors.
RED RED RED BLUE RED RED PURPLE!!!!!
GREEN YELLOW GREEN RED RED RED YELLOW!!!!!!!!!!!
(The next poster must translate with the penalty for messing up being put in the closet with GT and IHIYC)
I do because it is a lot like juggling running chainsaws, except furrier.
The next poster is the monster in "Here there be monsters"
Fear the Beard!
The next poster is a worse kind of monster.
I only want to dig into your skull, digest your brain, and make you into my meat puppet. Does that really make me a monster?
The next poster is my meat puppet.
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I am, in fact, Meat Puppet XXXIV.
Sarenrae doesn't want the next poster for a sunbeam.
Yeah. Truth be told, he spent three hours trying to prick his finger on a goat's horn, despite it being too blunt. By the end, he was sobbing "AAAAAA I NEED TO BLEED, I AM A WICKED WICKED PERSON AND NEED TO SUFFER FOR MY DIRTINESS!!!"
The next poster saw it too, but made a different interpretation.
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I did see and much to my shock and horror, GT was up to his usual perviness. But it was the look on Sissyl's face that said it all. A look that desired to inflict such elegant and delicious punishments, pain of unparalleled delight. I shudder even now with jealous longing.
The next poster has a quite not so messed up interpretation...