The Next Poster...


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Unfortunately, it wasn't by choice. My wife decided that a late-night marathon was in order and here I am trying to get some sleep as I have work at 5 am.

The next poster has picked for me what race and non-npc class my next Pathfinder character is going to be.

The Exchange

You will be a Half-Orc Monk named Durosk. He is a Sacred Mountain Archetype.

The next poster agrees that that is an awesome character.


I agree its an awesome character...

... just sadly not using the pathfinder rules.

The next poster wants to start a new monks are good/bad flame thread.


The only good kind of Monk is the homebrew one I created.

The next poster agrees with me, no questions asked.


Oh I agree, Homebrew Monk is better than the store brand.

The next poster questions everything.

The Exchange

What do you mean?

The next poster knows what I'm talking about. Nudge Nudge Wink Wink.

Scarab Sages

Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Maps, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

I know what you are talking about, but you are 100% wrong.

The next poster is only half there.


I'm incorporial to the public so only suffer 50% of the effects.

The next poster was banned from being in public for...

The Exchange

It was just the once and they left the door just laying there.

The next poster *mumbles incoherently*


-stops communing with the elder gods and looks around blearily-

The next poster is an avid Rostafari.


[puts down the ganja pipe] What you say, mon? I couldn't hear you over my Bob Marley record!

The next poster is goin' to Jamaica!


Being extradited is such a hassle.

The next poster wants to be a bounty hunter.


Hey, the benefits are good, hands-on experience, and the best part of all: I GET PAID! Although I'll probably be strict on it, I'm not hunting people just because they spilt salt on your new pet snail... On accident. Probably hunting those aholes that kill for stupid reasons, or those darned Xbox live kids, and just hang them upside down for a day, then threaten to do it again for a week while being fed gruel if I hear of it.

The next poster doesn't like the fact that I want to be an oddball bounty hunter.


You can't be a bounty hunter you fool, the bounty is on you. 500 GP reward for each red dragon head.

The next poster is trying to collect that bounty on Marthian.


Heh heh, suckers, I just gave them some other red dragon's head. Hey, he was terrorizing people, I did the community a service. Therefore, I am an oddball red dragon, and as such: should be treated as a gold dragon.

The next poster is now my accomplice in bounty hunting.


I'll take the job although i'm a little confused are we hunting a famous ship or litte coconut chocolate bars?

The next poster love to say and type the word antidisestablishmentarianism.


Of course, "antidisestablishmentarianism" isn't that useful a word, referring to an 18th century British political movement. (I.e. the philosophy of opposing those who seek to remove the establishment of the Church of England as the state church). As such, antidisestablishmentarianism is no longer much of a movement any more, and there really aren't any antidisestablishmentarianists around. If course, antidisestablishmentarianism is a particularly long word, which makes it loads of fun to use! Antidisestablishmentarianism!

The next poster nodded off at my last lecture.


*snore* Huh? What? Did someone say anything relevant?

The next poster will stat up a dwarfen Witch/Oracle as his next PFS character.


Okey Dockey, I'll be sure to let you know when I make my next PFS character.

The next poster still thinks a dwarven, fighter Bunny Rabbit would be a cool character.


actually, I don't think it's a cool character .It's a downright scary character with a vicious streak a mile wide. I mean look at all the bones. He's not even wearing armor, he's THAT vicious. Also if you do know what I'm talking about:

Spoiler:
The Holy Hand Grenade only reduced him to -1. He has 20 CON and Fast Healing 5.

Also it's in the Epic levels, soo... Have at ye? So cool doesn't cover it, it's scary in a awesome way.

The next poster is going to join me in my quest for hunting down a Chaotic Evil Snipe. Not the cute funny lovable one, that vicious evil one that steals everyone's sandles, and sacrifices them to it's evil bird lord.

Silver Crusade

Right! I have the map of the dungeon. All we need now is locate creature and we're good to go.

The next poster has to outfit us for this grand snipe hunt!

The Exchange

And who wanted the +3 Adamantine Sandals? What about the +4 Mythril Tube Socks? I just have these +2 Holy Trousers lying around. I'm going, too.

The next poster is too scared to even eat a bowl of cereal, let alone go on this mission.


When I was young, a bowl of Cornflakes had killed both of my parents. Since that day, I wake up in the middle of the night, screaming... and you're asking ME to join you?

The next poster explains how one bullet killed 15 people with one shot.


The marksman managed to shoot out the cord suspending the 20-foot-diameter crystal chandelier hanging 35 feet above the crowded swanky ballroom. With a silencer.

The next poster was at that swanky ball.

Scarab Sages

I warned them.
"Should these demands be ignored," the note said, "a disaster beyond your imagination will occur." What did they do?
They never paid my salary. They let Raoul take box 5. They cast that insufferable Madame Carlotta as the Countess! I had no choice.
Enjoy the FLOOR SHOW, monsieurs! AHAHAHAHAAAA!

The next poster's breath weapon is a 30-foot cone of iron pyrite confetti.


Only once, and it's because I would have incinerated the Chaotic Evil Snipe had it been a fire breath. Also dibs on the +3 Adamantine Sandles.

The next poster knows how I got a one-time 30-foot cone breath weapon of iron pyrite confetti.

The Exchange

*Shivers*

The next poster can only type 5 letter words, and wants to join the mission.


Sharp guard watch party.

Thene xtpos terca nonly mimic.


Killer mimic to be exact. And I was pretending to be a large chandelier when I suddenly fell on the crowd below. They broke my fall and filled my belly.

The next poster has read Inkwell and Haladir's post so they know what I mean.


Indeed I have. But it still doesn't solve my problems of the fact that I got the wrong snipe. Would you believe it, they all look the same... Curses.

I hope the next poster prepared Detect Chaotic Evil Snipe.


I did, and I din't find any, but I did prep charm snipe which should still be effective if that snipe is Chaotic Neutral.

The next poster thought we were serious, and really did catch a snipe.


So your telling me you're not serious? I won't tolerate this... And awe crap, this snipe is too lovable. Couldn't be him.

The next poster is starting to question my methods of trying to catch a snipe.

The Exchange

I question your methods of trying to catch a snipe. Do you use a snipe trap, or a cookie?

The next poster knows what I'ma talkin about.


Why yes I do, it's because "Memory Lapse." Wait what?

The next poster had cast Memory Lapse on me.


Mwahahahaha! He'll never catch me now.

The next poster wonders how i avoided the detect chaotic evil snipe spell.

The Exchange

How did he/she/it avoid the detect chaotic evil snipe spell?!?! Oh, yeah. Never set one up.

The next poster will try to catch it!


1d20 + 8 ⇒ (5) + 8 = 13 vs CMD
I missed...

The next poster has another plan.

The Exchange

I have another plan! Lets get a Snipe-bane Spear.

The next poster has one in his/her/its back pocket.


I would if I had pockets! I usually hypnotize the little buggers and get them to just give up.

The next poster gets caught in the mass hypnotic effect and just gives up as well.

The Exchange

I made my will save.

The next poster didn't.


I wave a white flag and surrender.

The next poster doesn't know what I mean by waving the white flag.


Why did you put your underpants on a pole and start waving them around?

The next poster has taken up streaking as a competitive sport.


You should try it in the Underdark.

The next poster only comes out at night.

The Exchange

Some call me Frankenstein

Spoiler:
That song came from the album "They only come out at night."

The next poster is currently sitting at their computer, reading this post out loud... in latin.


Ego mordebit tua talos.

Το επόμενο πρόσωπο που προτιμά Έλληνες.


But nobody will know it.

The next poster has become a turkey, thanks to me.


Gobble! (crap.)

The next poster will have to carry the Chaotic Evil Snipe Hunt on without me.


I couldn't tell if I was supposed to shoot chaotic evil people or be chaotic evil, so I'm systematically killing orphans and serial killers in a one-two pattern.

The next poster should find something more constructive to do with their wooden leg.

The Exchange

I'll ship off to boston! [ooc]<You guys make this too easy.>[ooc]

The next poster is a deceased roman emporer. Their choice.


Oculus-Tavius at your service. Nero fiddled while Rome burned and I watched him.

The next poster likes to sneak up behind people and give them the Heimlich Maneuver, yell " I saved another one!" then run away.

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