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64. Sachet of Lilacs and Roses - A small sewn handkerchief filled with expensive oils and flower petals. When held to the nose with one hand stops all ill effects from gas/cloud/vapor based attacks. Works for 30 rounds, non consecutive.
65. Clockwerk Hobgoblin - 12" tall mechanical hobgoblin attached to a stand. When button is pressed, goblin does a rigid mechanical dance for 3 rounds.
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66. Teddy Paladin
This adorable teddy bear in shining armor is also a phylactery of faithfulness. When the holder considers something the GM might punish them for, he delivers a small shock (1D4 subdual) and says in his cute little voice, “Oh no, don’t coup de grass sleeping monsters, that’s not nice.”
(I will play this game because I want my character to have one!)
67. Twig of Tricky Retreating
This small twig has runes carved into it's surface, and the leaves still on it stay green. When it's broken by a <insert race here> as a swift action, the twig casts 'expeditious retreat' on the user. If any race other than <insert race here> uses the twig, then it instead casts burning hands (doing 5d4 damage) on the user and possibly setting his clothes on fire.
Found on dead enemies, obviously, especially useful for goblins.
68. Mask of humanity
This mask provides alter self to human or humanoid. 20,000 sale value. The user (possibly a harpy or something) puts it on and thinks of an appearance. When they remove the mask they return to 'normal'.
72. A small brandy keg attached to a large dog collar.
If filled with brandy or similar high quality spirits and worn by a canine for 24 hours, the keg will transmute the alcohol into a combination potion of Cure Light Wounds and Resist Elements. The magical brandy must be consumed within one round of being poured from the keg or it loses its properties. The brandy does not lose its alcoholic content. The keg holds ten doses.
73. Cat Pillar.
A collection of small wooden tiles all exactly the same size, with a cat drawn/carved on each one. Formed into a small pillar, it functions just the game jenga. (P.S. Also makes a truly ridiculous monster, treat as swarm of cats.)
74. Bottle of Spell Restoration
This potion restores one first level spell slot per dose and there are 5 doses in this potion bottle. You could drink multiple doses at once to restore higher level spell slots. It works for all spellcasters. The potion is clear blue and tastes weird. Usually sells for 2,000 per dose, worth 10,000 total.
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75. Thumbscrew of truthfullness
THis miniature screwclamp is designed to be placed over a finger and screwed down causing pain but no damage. THe Pain instantly vanished when the victim tells the truth to the question demanded of them.
THis is a borderline item. Paladins and other Lawful Good persons using this item will have their Alignment adjusted permanently.
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76. Black Wood Staff
A beautifully carved staff made of all black wood. It allows the wielder to sacrifice a spell to do a ranged touch attack against a target. This attack deals 1d6+1 per caster level for each spell level sacrificed. The damage is simple force damage and takes the form of streaks of blue flame. Use of this item by those with an evil alignment causes them to make a FORT save or become nauseated. Neautral and good alignments do not suffer this penalty.
77. Curse Jar
This appears to be an efreeti jug but missing its stopper. It is usually immobile, attached to whatever surface it rests upon as if affixed with sovereign glue but so tightly it cannot be removed even with universal solvent. Inside will usually be some coins of various denominations but similarly affixed. The jar remains inert until a blasphemy, scatological remark, lewd comment, or malediction is spoken in its presence. At this point the speaker must make a DC 25 Will saving throw or be compelled to place coinage in the jar as follows:
Scatological remark, or blasphemy against an evil god: 1 copper
Lewd comment, or blasphemy against a neutral god: 1 silver
Malediction, or blasphemy against a good god: 1 gold.
If any magical curses or similar magics are cast in the jar's presence, the speaker faces a compulsion to place all the coinage on their person in the jar. If a person has no coinage, they instead receive a lesser geas to go find some and place it in the jar.
When the jar is full, it teleports to the nearest good person who has not spoken an ill word in over a year. (Typically a member of some religious order under a vow of silence.) This person may freely empty the jar, then place it in a new location. The jar affixes when the first ill word is said in its presence.
75. Thumbscrew of truthfullness
THis miniature screwclamp is designed to be placed over a finger and screwed down causing pain but no damage. THe Pain instantly vanished when the victim tells the truth to the question demanded of them.
THis is a borderline item. Paladins and other Lawful Good persons using this item will have their Alignment adjusted permanently.
I'm not sure, but maybe an Inquisitor should be immune to any consequences. Is there a file with the details of this class? It's a great item.
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I'm not sure, but maybe an Inquisitor should be immune to any consequences. Is there a file with the details of this class? It's a great item.
Inquisitors are actually immune to alignment adjustments when they are doing What Must Be Done. Because that's what they do.
78. Scroll of Remove Blindness
This scroll claims to be able to remove blindness (as the spell) from anyone who reads it, an unlimited number of times per day.
DM only, do not read aloud: Clever characters will eventually discover that the scroll's current script is totally illusory, though it is enchanted with a 'magic aura' as well as an 'illusory script' spell, so it really looks like a scroll of remove blindness. It is a medium or major scroll of the DM's choice.
79. Potion of Uselessness
This potion is absolutely useless. The liquid contained inside is not flammable but it does not quench fires, it does not alleviate thirst, and it does not conduct electricity. It is contained in a clay jar that deals no damage as a thrown weapon, nor does it break easily. However, many centuries ago, a god of wisdom declared that any mortal who found a way to use the potion of uselessness in any profitable manner whatsoever would be rewarded for their cunning and cleverness.
DM only, do not read aloud: The PC's can throw this potion to propel themselves while levitating, for example, and that would count. They could also use it as part of a distraction, a bluff, or a dirty trick maneuver of some kind. Once this has been accomplished, the character who did this is rewarded with a medium wondrous item.
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80. Deck of Good/Bad Fortune
These decks of fortune were created by accident when trying to get a more accurate reading. When used as focus for any divination spell the results always tell of the best or worst possible outcome or solution. When used for the purpose of fortune telling these cards always concentrate on their respective paths. If going down a road that has both cookies and wolves for instance, one would allow them to see the cookies, but not the wolves and the other vice versa. Neither Deck appears to be magical.
79. Potion of Uselessness
This potion is absolutely useless. The liquid contained inside is not flammable but it does not quench fires, it does not alleviate thirst, and it does not conduct electricity. It is contained in a clay jar that deals no damage as a thrown weapon, nor does it break easily. However, many centuries ago, a god of wisdom declared that any mortal who found a way to use the potion of uselessness in any profitable manner whatsoever would be rewarded for their cunning and cleverness.
DM only, do not read aloud: The PC's can throw this potion to propel themselves while levitating, for example, and that would count. They could also use it as part of a distraction, a bluff, or a dirty trick maneuver of some kind. Once this has been accomplished, the character who did this is rewarded with a medium wondrous item.
A jar containing a perfect electrical insulator in liquid form that also is non-flammable but somehow allows candles to burn while submerged? Alchemists would be all over this stuff and would be in the middle of alchemical analysis so they could make more of it when the god of wisdom would get annoyed and yank it, giving them some medium wondrous item in its place.
And the clay jar that isn't easily broken but causes no damage when thrown? This is an amazing alchemical achievement. Imagine the use as tankards for pubs where the patrons would have trouble breaking them but couldn't hurt anyone with them when they got in a brawl! It's nerfaramics!
(One imagines the annoyed god of wisdom yanking the jar from the alchemist as well.)
81: Instant House: This small piece of brick has been carved to resemble a simple cottage with a single door, two windows and a tiled roof. When placed upon the ground and the command word is spoke, the item's magic is expended and a cottage made of bricks with a red tile roof slowly expands to a full 20-foot diameter, at which point the item loses its magical properties and the cottage is permanent.
(We actually made this one, until the GM said "NO MORE!". Flood washed away the village, *poof*, here, have some temporary houses. Need to house the homeless? *poof*, there you go. Uses Secure Shelter.)
82: Warden's Hideout: This small piece of wood had been carved into a spherical shape with the elvish word for 'Shelter' carved on one side. When buried half-way into the ground and the command word is spoken, the sphere expands, becoming a translucent hemisphere that the owner can enter at will, taking up to 5 people with him inside. Once inside, the owner can command the sphere to take on the appearance of the local terrain, appearing as a thicket of bushes or a small hillock. This item can be used two times per week for up to 10 hours at a time.
(Yet another one a different GM was quite eager to take away from us. Uses Tiny Hut and Hallucinatory Terrain. We ended up giving this to a patrol of Elves who were fighting warbands of Bugbears and Hobgoblins. They used it to devastating effect as both a portable ambush device and as a place to stash their injured and give them a chance to rest and recover some hitpoints.)
79. Potion of Uselessness
This potion is absolutely useless. The liquid contained inside is not flammable but it does not quench fires, it does not alleviate thirst, and it does not conduct electricity. It is contained in a clay jar that deals no damage as a thrown weapon, nor does it break easily.
Oil of resist shock. The jar is shatterproof too. Nice.
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It's not oil of resist shock, it's a potion of uselessness. It will magically foil any use to which it is put, if it can. If you apply it to anybody or anything, it spills and dries up uselessly, conferring zero bonuses. The jar is not shatterproof, it's just not likely to break if you need it to do so. It causes no damage because it's light and simply not sufficient mass and density for an improvised weapon. If you use it to protect a light source (all eight ounces of it), it will magically defeat even this purpose and grow completely opaque. If you analyze it chemically, it will appear to be water. Only uses that disregard it completely as a substance (such as using it as part of a bluff) should be counted as "using" the potion of uselessness. If you try to wash something off with it, it will not clean. If you try to dirty something with it, the thing does not get dirtier. It was enchanted by a god to do one thing, and one thing only: be useless. It is very good at being useless. Please, just let it remain useless.
82. The Kitchen Sink: The Cleaves contains just about everything, even a kitchen sink. The kitchen sink seems to be made mostly of stone, and not metal, and it has a pipe that can magically attach to the ground at waist or chest height. If you turn one handle, it will cast a perpetual create water through the spigot, until you turn that handle back off. Turning the other will purify food and drink. It weighs thirty pounds, unfortunately.
DM only, do not read aloud: Breaking the sink (or its stone pipes) will cause 1d6+3 Ochre Jellies to spill out. Defeating them yields lost rings and jewelry worth 6,000 gp, including at least one wedding ring.
It's not oil of resist shock, it's a potion of uselessness. It will magically foil any use to which it is put, if it can. If you apply it to anybody or anything, it spills and dries up uselessly, conferring zero bonuses. The jar is not shatterproof, it's just not likely to break if you need it to do so. It causes no damage because it's light and simply not sufficient mass and density for an improvised weapon. If you use it to protect a light source (all eight ounces of it), it will magically defeat even this purpose and grow completely opaque. If you analyze it chemically, it will appear to be water. Only uses that disregard it completely as a substance (such as using it as part of a bluff) should be counted as "using" the potion of uselessness. If you try to wash something off with it, it will not clean. If you try to dirty something with it, the thing does not get dirtier. It was enchanted by a god to do one thing, and one thing only: be useless. It is very good at being useless. Please, just let it remain useless.
The trouble is, it won't remain useless for very long. It won't extinguish a light, but won't shield it either because it turns opaque, defeating the purpose of the illumination but serving as a way to shutter a lantern, which is useful, and putting the candle in the jar still serves the purpose of keeping from extinguishing the flame as might be the point if carrying it from house to house in high wind to light the hearth fire.
Then there's the experiment of dropping a mouse and a goldfish into the potion to see what happens. Does the mouse drown? Does the goldfish die of lack of oxygen? Do they both survive? Killing and preserving life are both uses and it's going to do one or the other.
I think the most amusing use would be to fill a fishbowl with it, put that over a flame, then see if that boils at the same time as you toss in a live fish. Either you have dinner or you have an amazing conversation piece.
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The trouble is, it won't remain useless for very long.
Yes it will. Watch this:
Shuttering a lantern/protecting a candle: the liquid turns opaque, then dries up in the heat/drips off of the lantern.Drop in a mouse and/or a goldfish: the potion evaporates on contact with either the mouse or the goldfish.
The trouble is, it won't remain useless for very long.Yes it will. Watch this:
Shuttering a lantern/protecting a candle: the liquid turns opaque, then dries up in the heat/drips off of the lantern.
Drop in a mouse and/or a goldfish: the potion evaporates on contact with either the mouse or the goldfish.
And it will also fail to amaze and entertain your party guests when you show them this, since they've all miraculously seen "useless potion" before and are jaded by it?
In any case, the useless potion will have a weight and it can be used as such in a Rube Goldberg device, and if it suddenly changes that weight or simply disappears, it can trigger the device using technology no more complex than a pair of balance scales with a goldfish being dropped into a bowl in each. Either the golfish remains happily swimming in the bowl of apparent water or it evaporates and thereby tips the balance, unless of course the god of wisdom continually keeps his thumb on the scale to foil the experiment but thereby proves His existence, which is useful from a theological standpoint.
And I'm sorry, it does have a use even as created: It keeps alchemists and tinkers amused for hours on end.
Perhaps it detects as a potion, looks like a potion, but has no effect on the drinker. Yeah you could sell it, but that's on you.
Idea for the potion of uselessness. A PC finds it while away from town, and only has a limited amount of time to use it before it simply disappears. If they can find a PRACTICAL use for it in that time, then this potion (which is the one and only of to have ever been created and can be the only one ever) still disappears but is replaced with said medium wonderous item.
This is one of thoes wonderful things that will be different at every GMs table. If you force a prisoner to drink it claiming it's a potion of truth or die, next time you encounter the potion it won't work that way. If you think the players have read these files, have it announce "I am the potion of uselessness!" when uncorked. :)
83. Bunnylogical Weapon
Ooooh look, a cute little bunny with big eyes. When you hug it, twin magic missiles shoot out of it's eyes at whoever it was looking at.
Another fine product brought to you by Primordial Ones Industries.
84. Sanchez’s Spoon
This stone ware pottery spoon has bright pattern on it. If put in a pot the pot will fill with spicy hot chili con carny. Like the Sustaining Spoon, but better.
85. Bottle of Too Much Water
Like the decanter of endless water, but messed up. If the cork is removed, it functions as a geyser. To stop it, you need to find the cork with a search DC15, then make a reflex save DC15 to replace the cork.
86. Horn of Plenty
This woven centerpiece is usually found full of fruits, vegetables, rolls, and muffins. It can be tipped to dump forth an endless stream of food. If a non-meat food is mentioned, it will pour forth just that. If used to fill a chasm to cross it, vermin will show up real fast.
DC Knowledge the planes 20 to get home?
Does 10 or less drop them back into The Cleaves?
89. The Brass Ring
If you cast detect magic or identify on it the writing in elvinish glows on the inside. What it says is, “This humble ring, is just the thing, when your one wish is gone, just pass it on.” Anyone with a finger can put the ring on, and as soon as they say “I wish…” the wish is granted but the ring is forever inert for that one person. The ring can be passed or sold to anyone else, and they can get a wish. I thought I invented this, but then it also appeared in Snarf Quest. It should always be granted somehow. If the wish seems impossible, try to use another interpretation of the words.
90. Nephrym's Claw. A long, black talon. Use it to cut yourself, and take 1d6 damage plus strength bonus (you can try to "go easy," but once you've committed to using it, it takes on a life of its own and you can't help but go all-in). It absorbs these HP into itself in the form of blood and transforms it into a healing elixir which you can give to others. It actually heals 2x whatever damage it did. You may not heal yourself with it. You may be healed by other means, but the Claw is hungry, so it keeps 1 of your HP permanently for itself (so it's 1 HP permanent HP loss).
It makes a lousy weapon: -2 penalty to hit, and the blood it uses for healing must be freely given.
91. Ribbons of Mind-Melding
Two lovely scarlet ribbons, generally worn as a decorative hair tie. - The Twisted Twin Sisters of Dramhaling Hall
When worn by two seperate individuals the ribbons create an unending 'Seek Toughts', 'Share Senses' and 'Telepathic Bond' effect between them. These effects fade once one or both of the ribbons are removed.
(EDIT: The Ribbons of Mind-Melding were made for two of my PCs who constantly table talked and metagamed. This solved the issue and made it part of the game.)
92. Lapel Pin of Bosom Binding / Broach of Bosom Bloating
A delicate silver lapel pin crafted to resemble a tiny dagger.
A stunning silver broach, laden with fine gems.
+4 circumstance bonus to disguise checks made to impersonate the opposite sex.
When worn by a female, the lapel pin of bosom binding transmutes the wearers chest, flattening it to resemble a man's musculature. If a man wears the lapel pin it has no effect. (EDIT: If the pin is removed the wearer reverts to their natural appearance.)
When worm by a male, the broach of bosom bloating transmutes the wearers chest, bloating the chest to resemble a woman's breasts. If a woman wears the broach it has no effect. (EDIT: If the broach is removed the wearer reverts to their natural appearance.)
93. Spectacles of Poor Perception
These slightly crooked spectacles are simple and unremarkable.
When wearing these spectacles an individual falls under the effects of an illusion spell which makes everyone else seem more attractive, interesting and friendly.
All characters interacting with the wearer get a +4 bonus to all CHA based skill checks with the exception of Handle Animal and Use Magical Device. Hostile threats seem less threatening to the wearer and all failed Bluff, Diplomacy, Disguise, Intimidate or Perform checks made by the user are perceived to be successes.
Once the spectacles are removed the illusion fades away and the wearer is dazed for 1 roud/1 hour of use, minimum 1 roud.
94. White Collar of Corporate Smiling
A rather fashionable white leather collar with pointed tips that buttons in the front.
Once worn, this magical collar forces the wearer to sport a very obnoxious fake smile whenever their mouth is inert.
The collar also grants the following bonuses and handicaps:
+2 Bluff and Diplomacy Checks
-2 Intimidate and Perform Checks
Once removed the collar's effects fade leaving the wearer with the distinct feeling that he/she looked like a tool.
96. Chime of the Coop
A lovely silver triangle complete with attached striking rod.
Aura faint conjuration; CL 2nd
Slot —; Price 1,150 gp; Weight 1 lbs.
Description:
If the possessor learns the proper note, he can sound the chime to attract 1d3 flocks of chicken if chicken are within 400 feet. For each 50-foot distance the chicken have to travel, there is a 1-round delay. The user must continue hitting the proper note until the chicken appear, and when they do so, the user must make a DC 10 Perform (percussion instrument) check. Success means that they obey the piper's telepathic commands so long as he continues to strike the correct note Failure indicates that they turn on the user. If for any reason the user ceases playing, the chicken leave immediately. The Perform DC increases by +5 for each time the chicken have been successfully called in a 24-hour period.
If the chicken are under the control of another creature, add the HD of the controller to the Perform check DC. Once control is assumed, another check is required each round to maintain it if the other creature is actively seeking to reassert its control.
Construction:
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, charm animal, summon nature's ally I, wild empathy ability; Cost 575 gp
97. Sword of Counterspelling
This longsword is +1 to hit and damage. It also seems to be a sword of spell storing. Actually, if a spell of 1st to 6th level is cast into it, then the next creature it hits that is casting that spell or is using that spellike ability, it neutralizes the spell or ability. Note that the sword is now empty and the target can recast or reuse.
98. Cap of Thinking
A simple and slightly worn quilted arming cap.
This cap helps the wearer tap into obscure pockets of knowledge tucked away in their minds.
The wearer recieves +3 to all Knowledge Skill checks. Once the cap is removed or damaged its magical effects do not persist.
**Note: The effects of the 'Cap of Thinking' do not grant bonuses to base stats or grant bonus ranks to any skill. It does not function like 'Fox's Cunning' and only effects Knowledge Skill checks.
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99. The Steam Powered Fan
This strange device appears to be a large, stoppered kettle fitted with a vertical pipe that extenda a few feet and bends to one side ending in a free spinning metal ball with metal feathers radiating out from it. When the kettle is filled with water and a fire applied to its base, the ball is turned by steam and the metal feathers blow wind in a common direction.
100. Wand of Korscythe
This 9 inch obsidian stick is so black that it absorbs light. Runes can be felt along it's length which reveal to the user how many charges remain and which spell is in the wand (DC45 Knowledge Arcana to decipher the runes the first time the wand is found). Unlike a normal wand, the Wand of Korscythe can hold any spell of up to 6th level, which is imbued into the wand by a 2d4+2 hour meditation which consumes the spellslot. The spell may be supplied by any caster, but if the spell is not on your spell list, you must make the appropriate Use Magic Device check. After it has been imbued with a spell, the wand may be used as a regular wand, charged with that spell with 4d12+10 charges.
Once a spell has been cast by the wand, it may not accept that spell again as a charge for 2d4+2 days.
The Wand of Korscythe can be destroyed by wrapping it in the antennae of a Rust Monster, dipping the tip in the blood of a Pixie and then asking a Vampire to plunge the stone wand deep into it's own heart. The destruction process can go wrong if the antennae are still soft and the Pixie blood is still wet; the Vampire immediately Greater Teleports to any place it wishes, where it enters an horrific cocoon-like state to emerge 2d4+2 years later having now gained the Lich template, the undestroyed Wand of Korscythe acting as the Lich's Phylactery.
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First two Cards for Unexpected Treasures...which already need modification
If you desire to submit art, please a black pen sketch will be fine. send to: reddeerrun@hotmail.com
I couldn't help but consider a horrifically cursed version of #88. Here it is, based on my modifications of the original text.
Journal of Betrayal (Moderate Divination, Illusion, Enchantment. Cursed. Caster level 12th)
This dusty, large and beautifully bound journal is filled with the handwriting of some sort of hero. The writing is different to everyone who reads it, but it's always inspirational somehow. The more someone reads it, the more one notices disturbing parallels between their life and the journal's events. A detect magic reveals only a faint divination effect.
As a PC reads it, the journal is effectively making a Diplomacy check (+25 v. sense motive) against the PC. At d4+1 points while reading the journal will outline events the PC will soon participate in, functioning as a divination spell with an 85% accuracy rating. The book's magic aura will change during these points, revealing moderate divination magic in effect.
Once the book has been read (a process that takes d3 weeks) the PC finds that her heroic counterpoint has been betrayed by her friends and murdered in her sleep. At this point the PC must make a DC 25 will save or be stricken with a growing paranoia towards the rest of the party.
During this time the PC will not willingly sleep, and should suffer the normal fatigue/exhaustion penalties. This will culminate in the fateful evening (two days after the initial will save), at which point the PC must make a second DC 25 will save or attack the party (per dominate person, the previously established paranoia removes the +2 save bonus in this case) for one hour, after which they are subject to confusion for the next twenty-four hours.
Succeeding on the second save results in the PC suffering from confusion for eight rounds during their watch on their “fated” evening. Succeeding on the first ends the effect, the story leaves the PC a bit nervous but has no other effects. Should the book fail on its Diplomacy check the story peters out, the PC becomes disinterested and...
This could be a trap.
3: a stack of books describing all classes, fighting styles abilities and spells, and even most monsters (doesnt actually have the spells written, just descriptions and names of them)
4: leathery scroll with 1 inch squares etched on one side and hexagons on the other. any ink spilled on it can be wiped off as long as it has been left on it less than a month.
5: a box with miniature statuettes about 1 inch in height
*DM briefing -c'mon you get it, think about it
Brings to mind this XKCD comic..
http://xkcd.com/557/
Yes it's true!
Back on Topic
05: Figure summoning: 0 to Epic: Like monster summoning but the caster must have a figure, carved
and painted, as a focus. the maximum Els summoned is spell level X2. 0 level is up to 1 el such as
some kobolds. Epic has no limit. Actual Els summoned are caster level. Multiple creatures
summoned require multiple figure focuses.
101. Copper Coffee Pot
Some of these are traps or worthless, but you can always substitute coins, gems, or magic items.
In medieval times they thought the copper would cure people, and it only worked with parasites.