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Snapleaf


Round 1 - Open Call: Create a Wondrous Item

Qadira RPG Superstar 2010 Top 8, Contributor

Aura faint transmutation and illusion; CL 5th
Slot neck (see below); Price 750 gp; Weight -

DESCRIPTION
Found across Golarion in the hands of Red Mantis Assassins and Nimrathi forest fighters alike, Snapleaves are a single use magic item, potent for both infiltration and evading escape.
Carved from crystal to resemble a leaf of any kind, a Snapleaf is worn around the neck although it does not conflict with any other magical item a character might wear on that slot of the body.
Activating a snap leaf is an immediate action. Once activated the wearer benefits from the effects of both Feather Fall and Invisibility. While the feather fall effect terminates once the wearer touches ground, the invisibility persists for another 5 rounds, or unless the wearer otherwise terminates the effect, per the Invisibility spell.
If activated when not falling the Snapleaf grants its Invisibility effect for 5 rounds. The Feather Fall effect, however, is wasted and cannot be triggered at a later time.

CONSTRUCTION
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Feather Fall, Invisibility; Cost 375 gp

Founder, Legendary Games & Publisher, Necromancer Games, RPG Superstar Judge

So I figured snapleaf means you break it to get the effect, but that doesnt seem to be the case. It just says it is a single use magic item. That's not really the best way to say it, but I get it. So, do you have to actually snap the leaf? Plus, I dont like the "neck slot but not neck slot, see below." He really means its "slot: --" and let the PC decide how to keep ahold of it--in a pocket, on a chain, whatever. Its not really a neck slot item. Or, if it is, then it should not permit other neck slot items. . Rookie mistake.

I like the idea of a triggered feather fall and invisibility item. I like its limited use.

This one is a bit sloppy. This is what the entries looked like last year. Good items, but they had a flaw like this--poor use of the slot or some other mechanical issue.

I need to check the price. Its basically a feather fall scroll and invisibility scroll that triggers at the same time and can be done as an immediate action, which is sweet. Like feather fall. So invis is 2x3x50=300 plus 1x1x50 for ff = 350. But that's just the spells. The no slot restriction doubles it to 700. So it should be cost 700, price 1400. I also think the immediate action is a benefit here on the double spell at one time (which breaks the rules and needs to be paid for) that could or should double the cost of the item. I'd price this at 1400 cost and 2800 price.

These are growing on me, despite the neck slot issue and being under-costed. These are just too good at 750.

But damn it, this is a good item. The flaws arent enough to scare me off. I want to hold onto this.

Designer, RPG Superstar Judge

Actually, a caster level 5 invisibility would last 5 minutes, not 5 rounds, so this item (which lasts rounds) would have a huge discount compared to an item that gave you the full 5 mins of invisibility.

The neck/no slot thing is sloppy, but I think the cost is probably close to what it should be. I think this person can be trained to do better.

Keep!

Paizo Employee Editor-in-Chief

"Nimranthi"... huh.

For a single use guy, this is neat, has a cool little theme, is tied into our world. Nothing that's setting my hair on fire, but not bad.

RPG Superstar 2009, Contributor

I get the sense this item is bordering on the Campaign Item stereotype, in that it's crafted for a very specific type of character...i.e., the assassin or rogue who wants an easy aerial insertion behind enemy lines with the ability to hit the ground running...while invisible! But the item's got applicability beyond that, of course. If you don't need the feather fall effect, you can just use it as a quickened invisibility spell-in-a-can...though it has a shorter duration (5 rounds vs. 5 minutes, as Sean cited).

I don't know. I'm not bowled over by it. The name seems off since there's no mention of snapping or breaking the leaf in order to activate its abilities. It's like the recipe was there for invoking some cool flavor, but the description skipped that ingredient and didn't include it. There are some other troubling signs from a presentation perspective, too. Aside from the "neck slot" issue that isn't...which is actually a pretty serious omission, I think...the spell names mentioned in the descriptive text and construction requirements aren't lower-case and italicized like you'd expect in a published product. The template missed the opportunity to bold the Aura, CL, Slot, Price, Weight, etc. information. In and of themselves, none of these individually kill the item, of course. But it's the accumulation of these oversights and omissions that leave me thinking the author might not be ready for the later rounds of the competition.

So, from an advice perspective, you've really got an uphill climb to showcase your talents and win over the voting public. You've got the seed of a good idea. You applied Golarion lore mostly right. You kept your design tight and controlled your word count really well (i.e., 175 words is well below the 300-word limit and could have met the more stringent requirements from previous years). But, you need to work on your presentation, attention to detail, and rules-fu. Shore up those areas and it will help you in the long run. In the meantime, welcome to the ranks of RPG Superstar. Best of luck!

Osirion RPG Superstar 2009 Top 4 , Star Voter 2013 aka raidou

This is basically a spells-in-a-can utility item. What sets it apart is its immediate action trigger. So you can activate it in response to an enemy's attack, in response to falling into a pit full of rats, in response to a sudden appearance of the guard, and so on. The item gives you a way to briefly go crazy with your bad ninja self.

But still, it's a spell-in-a-can. Despite its usefulness it lacks the innovation I am really looking for here.

I think you've got the makings of a good infiltration item here. But various aspects of your execution prevent it from being fully realized. Take to heart the judges' comments above; they know what they're talking about and stepping up your design will be needed to get into the later rounds.

Best of luck in the future rounds of the competition. Welcome aboard!

RPG Superstar 2009 Top 4 aka K. B. Carter

Congrats on making it to RPG Superstar 2010! I asked myself the same three questions for each of the top 32 items. Here are my responses to your item:

Would this wondrous item unbalance or over-complicate my game if my PCs were to find it and use it?
Snapleaf seems okay on this front. A quickened invis might be a bit too good for the price, but that doesn't bother me too much, prices are easy to adjust.

Would my PCs be happy with this item if they were to find it during an adventure?
This is what my PCs call an "Oh @#&!" item (explicative deleted), meaning it sits in your inventory until you're caught off guard by something (i.e. a situation in which you say "Oh @#&!"). They always appreciate these items. From my perspective as a game master, I would like to give this item to my NPCs so they can go invis without wasting an action, which can make an encounter a lot more difficult for the PCs.

How's the mojo? Does the item spark other ideas for my campaign?
I really like the name "Snapleaf". I know your item is constructed, but it still got me thinking about fantasy flora, and how much potential for development there is here. I can imagine a snapleaf tree or a snapleaf treant. Definitely conjures some cool ideas. You score top marks here.

RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32 aka Hydro

I agree with the judges about the issues in presentation but I can totally see why this one was kept anyway. I'm coming up with tons of tactically useful (and visually/cinematically awesome) things that a clever hero or villain could do with them.

Know how often a hero leaps from a window, plummets five stories, lands in the moat/ocean/other-convenient-body-of-water, emerges close to shore and slips away? Well, I can't help but think of a snapleaf as being a moat-in-a-can.

I think this is one of those items that will become ubiquitous among certain character types if introduced to a game world (assuming their creation process isn't a secret); they're very circumstantial, but so useful in the right circumstances that it's hard to set a price that will keep everyone from wanting a couple. Personally, I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing.

Qadira RPG Superstar 2010 Top 8, Contributor

Thanks so much for all of the feedback.
I appreciate the honest critique and look forward to making the changes in the next round.
-QGJ

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 8 , Marathon Voter 2013, Star Voter 2014 aka Demiurge 1138

Good name, but it's a spell in a can. I'm bitter about spells in cans, after last year's competition (wherein the judges complained about them at length, then 1/4 of the Top 32 items were of a certain spellish and cannular persuasion). The immediate activation and the vastly reduced duration are interesting wrinkles, and the pricing from them is clever. I can see a lot of characters getting a good use out of these.

But it's still just a spell in a can.

Dedicated Voter 2014

I'm really inclined to agree with Neil here. This feels like an item that an adventure would use to make one encounter slightly more interesting (i.e. crazy assassination attempt in the woods). I can see these items being abused, especially since they don't occupy the neck slot. Does this mean I could buy a bunch and wear multiples, turning myself invisible anytime it looks as though an enemy is going to get a nasty hit? I can foresee something like this happening:

DM: *dice roll* Natural 20, possible crit.
DM: *dice roll* Possible double crit
DM: *dice roll* Confirm crit at AC 28?
Player: Yes, that hits...but I'm going to use an immediate action to make myself invisible!

For me, the Featherfall effect seems like a clumsy afterthought. Furthermore, the immediate invisibility brings up a wealth of game issues. The name is cool and the price is fair enough. I'm sure this item would make for a cool encounter in a wilderness and/or reconnaissance adventure.

In sum, it's a spell-in-a-can-for-that-one-encounter-in-adventure-X.

Qadira Marathon Voter 2013, Marathon Voter 2014 aka Shadowborn

First off, congratulations on making it to round 2!

When I read the description, I immediately thought "escape hatch." I'm fond of items that hang around until you need them to get you out of a jamb, quickly. This is one of those. That said, I found the invisibility to be a no-brainer, but the feather fall was a bit confusing at first. I can see Red Mantis assassins turning invisible and leaping out of windows or a forest fighter feather falling out of his tree perch, I suppose. I'd probably have gone with expeditious retreat just because it has a higher chance of utility. Still, a good one-shot item.

The item description definitely needs some editing and polish.

Qadira RPG Superstar 2010 Top 16, Contributor

I see a lot of criticism of this item and I agree with much of it but I also think this item is a real winner. It is definitely a spell in a can but it's well implemented and fun. The biggest issue I see is the pricing and immediate invisibility which makes this item a bit of a no-brainer for players and a potential headache for GMs.

All that aside, it's a fun item and another item I might drop into my game. Congratulations on breaking into the Top 32. I look forward to competing against you in round 2!

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16 , Marathon Voter 2013, Marathon Voter 2014 aka MythrilDragon

A crafty idea to blend invisibility with feather fall. Good luck on the next round.

RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter 2013, Star Voter 2014 aka SmiloDan

Minorelementx wrote:


DM: *dice roll* Natural 20, possible crit.
DM: *dice roll* Possible double crit
DM: *dice roll* Confirm crit at AC 28?
Player: Yes, that hits...but I'm going to use an immediate action to make myself invisible!

.

Even then, there's still a 50% chance of hitting, even if the DM allows the immediate action to be declared after a threat was rolled, but before it was confirmed. Just before the attack roll, sure! But afterwards isn't going to save you from the damage roll at my table!

I also think this is a nifty item. I really like "trump card" items and abilites, like single use magic items or unusual uses for swift actions.

Dedicated Voter 2014

SmiloDan wrote:
Minorelementx wrote:


DM: *dice roll* Natural 20, possible crit.
DM: *dice roll* Possible double crit
DM: *dice roll* Confirm crit at AC 28?
Player: Yes, that hits...but I'm going to use an immediate action to make myself invisible!

.

Even then, there's still a 50% chance of hitting, even if the DM allows the immediate action to be declared after a threat was rolled, but before it was confirmed. Just before the attack roll, sure! But afterwards isn't going to save you from the damage roll at my table!

I also think this is a nifty item. I really like "trump card" items and abilites, like single use magic items or unusual uses for swift actions.

According to the rules an immediate action may be taken at any time. That may be your call as a DM to rule that a player could not use it then, but the rules permit that they are fully able to do so. Yes, there is still a 50% chance of taking that crit, but what if it's a sneak attacking rogue? In that situation, that immediate invisibility would totally negate the chance of sneak attack damage being applied (as it states under the conditions for invisibility). Furthermore, I'm arguing that players use it BEFORE damage is rolled, such as when they are suspecting a huge amount of damage.

I think the problem for me is the immediate action. If it had been swift instead, I would probably like this item more.


I really like this item (maybe as I play Rogues alot). In fact this was the first item of the 32 I looked at just becuase its name caught my eye and interested me.

Its been said before but it should take a neck slot, it should really 'snap' when being used and probably should be a higher cost but not to high due to the spell limitations.

Good item, gald it made it and well done.

Taldor RPG Superstar 2010 Top 16, 2011 Top 32 , Star Voter 2013, Star Voter 2014

I am a leaf on the wind, see how, wait, don't see! Nice. I like this as a villain's get away free card. Step backwards off the high tower ledge and disappear. Only think I might add is a special effect that creates a loud snapping noise and a small puff of smoke, in order to make viewers belief you teleported away. Neat.


I think i Would have discarded this as a SIAC , a nice SIAC, but a SIAC nevertheless.

Foolish me!

Oh. it's just a Safewing enblem or Ring of Feather falling or one of the dozen other safe fall items, just with the little added benefit of invisibility, so at first glance i seems rather bland.

but the more you think about it the nicer it becomes. sometimes simple is best!

RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8 , Star Voter 2013

Interesting, I think it depends on how you define immediate interrupts.

I usually use the 'result announced rule' seen in a lot of abilities in 3x.

To flowchart...

DM rolls to hit

  • If Player announces he's using the item then the invisibility affects the to hit roll. Else:
    DM announces it's a possible Crit:
  • If Player announces he's using the item then the invisibility affects the crit roll. Else:
    DM announces result of the crit roll
  • If Player announces he's using the item then the invisibility affects the damage (which doesn't change the damage rolled, but you know what I mean).

    So for a Sneak attack, the only way to 'negate' the sneak attack damage is to use the item before the DM rolls or after the DM rolls but hasn't announced the result.

    Or to use a football analogy, the Coach can throw the challenge flag at any moment prior to the next play.


  • Jesse Benner wrote:
    ...Found across Golarion in the hands of Red Mantis Assassins and Nimrathi forest fighters alike, Snapleaves are a single use magic item, potent for both infiltration and evading escape...

    I am left with the impression that these organisations were pulled out of the air at random for flavour purposes. The start of the passage I quote above could just as easily have read 'Found across Golarion in the hands of Eagle Knight spies and Pathfinder explorers alike...' The attempt to use flavour makes no sense to me - there is nothing about the item which calls out 'this is specifically a Red Mantis item, this is specifically an item used by guerillas from Nirmathas'. (And it should be 'Nirmathi', by the way, not 'Nimrathi'.)

    And why would you want to 'evade escaping'? That's a double negative, which cancels out to say 'I use this item to make sure I get captured'.

    It isn't clear to me from the description why the item is called a snapleaf (and if you have to 'snap' it manually with your hands to activate it, that has ramifications regarding if your hands are/aren't free for activation), and something which gives you a Quickened Invisibility effect, even shortened in duration to 5 rounds, is something I have concerns about being only 750 gp.
    I don't know if you were under time-pressure to get this in, but please find someone else to proof-read entries for future rounds if the contest rules permit it, or be a lot more thorough in your own proof-reading.
    Congratulations on reaching the top 32, but unless you tighten up your act, you will have difficulty proceeding further against some of the competition who wrote a lot tighter items than this.

    Dedicated Voter 2014

    Matthew Morris wrote:

    Interesting, I think it depends on how you define immediate interrupts.

    I usually use the 'result announced rule' seen in a lot of abilities in 3x.

    To flowchart...

    DM rolls to hit

  • If Player announces he's using the item then the invisibility affects the to hit roll. Else:
    DM announces it's a possible Crit:
  • If Player announces he's using the item then the invisibility affects the crit roll. Else:
    DM announces result of the crit roll
  • If Player announces he's using the item then the invisibility affects the damage (which doesn't change the damage rolled, but you know what I mean).

    So for a Sneak attack, the only way to 'negate' the sneak attack damage is to use the item before the DM rolls or after the DM rolls but hasn't announced the result.

    Or to use a football analogy, the Coach can throw the challenge flag at any moment prior to the next play.

  • You are right. And that is certainly how I run things. My issue is that not everyone does use this method. Furthermore, I feel as though this is one of those items that can lead players to meta-game (i.e. oh this rogue is going to 'sneak attack' me because I'm flanked so I'm invisible). Keep in mind that in game, your 3rd level character doesn't necessarily know what a 'sneak attack' is and, if the rogue hasn't attacked yet, does not know if he/she can even do that.

    A player COULD (according to the rules) wait to see how bad the hit could potentially be and, before the DM rolls damage, turn their character invisible; according to immediate action rules, that's perfectly legal. I'm only saying this because I am currently playing an illusionist who prepares quickened invisibility to negate hits on himself or others. I would not let someone hear the damage and turn themselves invisible after the fact; that's my personal take on it.

    Shadow Lodge Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 Top 8 aka Benchak the Nightstalker

    This is a fun item. Simple, to the point, and it has lots of potential. I like the name too, snapleaf, has a nice ring to it!

    Osirion RPG Superstar 2013 , Dedicated Voter 2013, Dedicated Voter 2014 aka Steven T. Helt

    My only real criticisms are that the item is pretty much a spell in a can. The only really imaginative thing about it is the physical description, which leaves out the most interesting detail (how is the item activated? Is it 'snapped'?). And of course the magic item slot/non magic item slot. I don't mind a little playing around with slots, but I don't like stacking slots on top of each other.

    To respond to Charles, I don't think it'smuch of a stretch to connect the item to assassins and rangers. I don't think it's necessary to exclude other groups by giving the groups exclusive use or description of the snapleaf, and I don't think an explanation is required on how they specifically use it. I get that that's maybe amatter of taste. But most of the time, no one really cares who uses a good item - if it's great, it's yoinked from Mediogalti straight onto your character sheet, right?

    COngratulations on being Top 32. If you are going to get my vote in the next round, you are going to have to be more imaginative and more clever with mechanics.

    Qadira RPG Superstar 2010 Top 8, Contributor

    Charles,
    Thanks for the congratulations and, more importantly, the honest critique. You've given me some really vital things to watch out for going forward. I'll take 20 on my proofreading check next time.
    Best Regards,
    QGJ

    Paizo Employee Editor-in-Chief

    Jesse, you get the award for classiest contestant thus far.

    Qadira RPG Superstar 2010 Top 8, Contributor

    Thanks Wesley. Much obliged
    See everyone on the boards tomorrow.
    Cheers
    -QGJ

    Star Voter 2013, Dedicated Voter 2014

    Congratulations Jesse!

    Mechanics and combo of spells is good though I felt the inspiration wanting. I am sure with your homebrew these elements are self evident and hope to see more of that evidence in your future rounds.

    I now have a reason for my characters to own a catapult (or a dragon maybe, but I already had lots of reasons for that) and that is why you are Top 32. Good Luck!

    RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8 , Star Voter 2013

    Qui-gon Jesse wrote:

    Charles,

    Thanks for the congratulations and, more importantly, the honest critique. You've given me some really vital things to watch out for going forward. I'll take 20 on my proofreading check next time.
    Best Regards,
    QGJ

    Speaking from experience, you might also want to get some friends to 'aid another'.

    I know I did, and amour still got through. I do like this item, and it's easy to adjudicate.

    Did anyone else think 'turn invisible, step off balcony' would be seen by the observer as a teleport effect? one second he's there, the next he's not?


    Qui-gon Jesse wrote:

    Aura faint transmutation and illusion; CL 5th

    Slot neck (see below); Price 750 gp; Weight -

    DESCRIPTION
    Found across Golarion in the hands of Red Mantis Assassins and Nimrathi forest fighters alike, Snapleaves are a single use magic item, potent for both infiltration and evading escape.
    Carved from crystal to resemble a leaf of any kind, a Snapleaf is worn around the neck although it does not conflict with any other magical item a character might wear on that slot of the body.
    Activating a snap leaf is an immediate action. Once activated the wearer benefits from the effects of both Feather Fall and Invisibility. While the feather fall effect terminates once the wearer touches ground, the invisibility persists for another 5 rounds, or unless the wearer otherwise terminates the effect, per the Invisibility spell.
    If activated when not falling the Snapleaf grants its Invisibility effect for 5 rounds. The Feather Fall effect, however, is wasted and cannot be triggered at a later time.

    CONSTRUCTION
    Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Feather Fall, Invisibility; Cost 375 gp

    Not a terribly evocative item, I'd have liked it to be actually snapped as a one use item and I do not find myself agreeing with a non-slot cheap item being activated as an immediate action.

    I like the bit that incorporates it into the setting though, it really can add to the assassins flavour to have such signature items.

    Osirion

    I like it, but you need to tighten up the text as mentioned by others and get the cost right.

    When I steal, er, "borrow" this for my campaign, I'm going to make breaking it the required activation method.

    You know what? This is actually a potion that uses the alternate methods of consumption from a back issue of Dragon (or Pyramid, I forget which), not a wondrous item at all.

    That's not a problem for me, but be careful of that in later rounds.

    RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8 , Star Voter 2013

    Patrick Walsh wrote:

    I like it, but you need to tighten up the text as mentioned by others and get the cost right.

    When I steal, er, "borrow" this for my campaign, I'm going to make breaking it the required activation method.

    You know what? This is actually a potion that uses the alternate methods of consumption from a back issue of Dragon (or Pyramid, I forget which), not a wondrous item at all.

    That's not a problem for me, but be careful of that in later rounds.

    I think it stays on the wondrous item side of the line because you get two spell effects out of it, and it doesn't emulate the spell exactly. That keeps it in wondrous item territory (plus I like it). ;-)

    Osirion RPG Superstar 2008 Top 4; Contributor; Publisher, Legendary Games

    SmiloDan wrote:
    Minorelementx wrote:


    DM: *dice roll* Natural 20, possible crit.
    DM: *dice roll* Possible double crit
    DM: *dice roll* Confirm crit at AC 28?
    Player: Yes, that hits...but I'm going to use an immediate action to make myself invisible!

    .

    Even then, there's still a 50% chance of hitting, even if the DM allows the immediate action to be declared after a threat was rolled, but before it was confirmed. Just before the attack roll, sure! But afterwards isn't going to save you from the damage roll at my table!

    I also think this is a nifty item. I really like "trump card" items and abilites, like single use magic items or unusual uses for swift actions.

    Ditto here. You can do your immediate action before the attack, no problem, but once the attack roll is made the rest of the rolls are all still resolution of the first roll.

    Notice above, the player wants to turn invisible AFTER that crit confirm is rolled (I see you're using some kind of double-crit house rule) - that's fine, but it won't happen until AFTER damage is rolled. You've already rolled the confirm; rolling the damage isn't a separate event they can interrupt, it's just finishing the action they already chose not to interrupt.

    "Immediate action" is NOT "retroactive action." Even if you were to allow a player to use an IA in the middle of resolving the crit roll, they'd have to do it before you threw the dice. Once the roll is rolled, no take-backs (unless they have a metagame immediate action ability like "make an enemy reroll a die" type of thing).

    If the monster had a second attack, sure they could immediate action in response to that.

    So, immediate action cheese apart, I like this item okay. I like the concept of a "stealth paratrooper" item, though them being relatively cheap no-slot items does open up pathways to abuse (rather like the Dazzler item in 2008). I understand the need to use immediate action to facilitate the feather fall, but otherwise it seems odd that this item has no clear method of activation. Like Clark said, are you supposed to snap the leaf? Does it require you to have a hand free? Is it a move action to draw the item out if it's not already being worn? Maybe that was the purpose of saying they are worn around the neck, to avoid the "I get it out of my pack" issue.

    If the item is supposed to be a paratrooper item, keep it as is but make it a standard action activation and I think it's just about perfect the way it is.

    If the item is supposed to be a "get out of jail free card" item, then it probably should either take an item slot, or be more expensive, or have some note about the actions involved in getting it out or in activating it (command word, silent act of will, physical crushing). Some of that is the fault of abuse of immediate action rules more so than your item per se, but if you're gonna swim in that end of the pool you need to deal with the sharks that live there.

    In sum: The idea is cool, but there are some definite mechanical questions to answer about it, including finding the focus of the item and making sure the mechanics fit the purpose.

    Osirion

    After discussion in a different thread, I withdraw my statement about this being a potion variant.

    However, the cost being off is now an issue for me. Clark's suggested revision of 1400 cost and 2800 price goes a long way to fixing this.

    It also NEEDS a definition of how it is activated.

    RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32 aka Hydro

    That sounds closer to me. By the books, quickened invisibility would be 6,600. There are a lot of other factors at play here but it should be somewhere in that ballpark.

    Andoran RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32, 2011 Top 16 , Star Voter 2013, Star Voter 2014 aka JoelF847

    Great job making it to the top 32! I have to agree with just about all of the previous comments, but it sounds like you're taking them to heart, so no need to repeat them.

    The one thing I'll add though is I finished reading this and couldn't stop thinking, "okay, but why is it a leaf?" I don't see any connection to having it be leaf shaped and it's powers, nor the people most likely to use the item. It could just as easily be called a snapdragon, snapberet, snapple, snapmouse, or anything else. When I first read the name of the item, I was expecting (and looking forward to reading about) something that caused nearby leaves to reach out and grab someone, or summon a giant venus flytrap, or cause a tree to transform its leaves into crystaline missiles and fire them off in an area of effect. Luckily for you, this wasn't an issue for the judges, and you've got a chance to wow us with your monster concept. Good luck!

    EDIT - I just got the feather fall connection with a leaf, but still think it's a stretch to link the invisibility effect to the name.

    RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32 aka Hydro

    Joel Flank wrote:

    Great job making it to the top 32! I have to agree with just about all of the previous comments, but it sounds like you're taking them to heart, so no need to repeat them.

    The one thing I'll add though is I finished reading this and couldn't stop thinking, "okay, but why is it a leaf?" I don't see any connection to having it be leaf shaped and it's powers, nor the people most likely to use the item. It could just as easily be called a snapdragon, snapberet, snapple, snapmouse, or anything else. When I first read the name of the item, I was expecting (and looking forward to reading about) something that caused nearby leaves to reach out and grab someone, or summon a giant venus flytrap, or cause a tree to transform its leaves into crystaline missiles and fire them off in an area of effect. Luckily for you, this wasn't an issue for the judges, and you've got a chance to wow us with your monster concept. Good luck!

    EDIT - I just got the feather fall connection with a leaf, but still think it's a stretch to link the invisibility effect to the name.

    Random thought: what if the character wasn't quite invisible, instead appearing to observers as a single leaf floating down from the sky or blowing in the wind?

    Anyway, I kind of thought the same thing at first. However, other posters have gone right ahead to make that connection for themselves (imagining "snapleaf trees"), and inspiring that kind of thinking is a sort of victory in itself.

    Dedicated Voter 2014

    Jason Nelson wrote:
    SmiloDan wrote:
    Minorelementx wrote:


    DM: *dice roll* Natural 20, possible crit.
    DM: *dice roll* Possible double crit
    DM: *dice roll* Confirm crit at AC 28?
    Player: Yes, that hits...but I'm going to use an immediate action to make myself invisible!

    .

    Even then, there's still a 50% chance of hitting, even if the DM allows the immediate action to be declared after a threat was rolled, but before it was confirmed. Just before the attack roll, sure! But afterwards isn't going to save you from the damage roll at my table!

    I also think this is a nifty item. I really like "trump card" items and abilites, like single use magic items or unusual uses for swift actions.

    Ditto here. You can do your immediate action before the attack, no problem, but once the attack roll is made the rest of the rolls are all still resolution of the first roll.

    Notice above, the player wants to turn invisible AFTER that crit confirm is rolled (I see you're using some kind of double-crit house rule) - that's fine, but it won't happen until AFTER damage is rolled. You've already rolled the confirm; rolling the damage isn't a separate event they can interrupt, it's just finishing the action they already chose not to interrupt.

    "Immediate action" is NOT "retroactive action." Even if you were to allow a player to use an IA in the middle of resolving the crit roll, they'd have to do it before you threw the dice. Once the roll is rolled, no take-backs (unless they have a metagame immediate action ability like "make an enemy reroll a die" type of thing).

    If the monster had a second attack, sure they could immediate action in response to that.

    So, immediate action cheese apart, I like this item okay. I like the concept of a "stealth paratrooper" item, though them being relatively cheap no-slot items does open up pathways to abuse (rather like the Dazzler item in 2008). I understand the need to use immediate action to facilitate the feather fall, but otherwise it seems odd that...

    As I've said above, I agree with your statements. I would not let a player do so after the fact. My point is that other people may interpret an immediate action in a different way. Keep in mind that the definition we have for immediate action is "an action that can be performed at any time during a round, even when it's not your turn." Sure, I would argue that the spirit of the rules dictate that an immediate action couldn't be used after an attack roll is made; however, another gamer may read the rules and interpret them in a different way. For example, one could argue what exactly does "any time" mean? Does that mean in-game time or out-of-game time? Or both? The entry does not explicitly say. Again, I'm not saying I do - I'm just claiming that others might.

    As for the crit thing: my game group's games are an amalgam of rules from 2nd, 3rd, 3.5, Pathfinder, and house. I actually don't remember where the rules for crit "stacking" came from, but I know it came from something: it might have been borne out of something in 2nd edition, but I don't have the books in front of me at the moment so I'm not totally sure. Basically, we claim that if you roll to confirm a crit and, on that next roll the number you'd get would be considered a threat (usually 19 or nat 20), we say that it's a double crit - sometimes you get really lucky and can get a triple crit! While most game systems went with making crits less deadly, we kept ours deadly. I apologize for not making that clear in my previous post.

    Marathon Voter 2013, Marathon Voter 2014

    I am not sure about the Neck slot but allows other neck items to be used too thing, why not just call it slottless? Still it is a solid item that has nice uses and great flavor, and certainly deserves its spot in the top 32.

    Well Done, and Good Luck in the rest of the contest!

    Sczarni RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32

    I really like this item. It's the type of thing that encourages cool, cinematic play, so for that alone it's awesome. I've played lots of characters that would have bought a snapleaf and I like how you alluded to some of the types of organizations that use them for their members. Congrats on the top 32. I can't wait to see your monster concept.

    Andoran Contributor , Star Voter 2013, Marathon Voter 2014

    Congratulations! I have a couple of concerns that have already been noted by others, so I won't rehash them here. However, this is a nicely evocative item, and I look forward to seeing your monster entry.

    Good luck!

    Cheliax RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32, 2011 Top 16 , Marathon Voter 2013, Marathon Voter 2014 aka Boxhead

    This is an elegant, simple and interesting item. I could easily see it being wanted by players and villains alike. In fact, I could guarantee that a few of my players would jump at the opporunity to pick up one (or a few) if I dropped them in next session.

    It reminds me of the "teleport and create a double" trick. a very cool idea.

    Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 Top 4

    Jesse,

    Congratulations on making it to the Top 32!

    You've gotten a lot of good feedback, so no need to belabor the negative. Not from me anyway.

    Furthermore, I agree with Wes wholeheartedly. You've kept your head and stayed cool with some tough criticism. That counts a lot with me (and I don't do so well under that sort of scrutiny myself).

    As I've said to others, invoking Golarion takes some guts, especially when we were warned of the risks. You took a gamble and it either worked or it didn't hurt you. I love risk takers.

    I look forward to seeing what you can do in Round Two. It's too late to say, "Round Two can be a springboard to show how much you can improve", but I hope you do just that anyway.

    RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32, 2011 Top 4 , Marathon Voter 2013, Marathon Voter 2014 aka DankeSean

    Not bad at all. Not my favorite, not the most innovative effect, but simple and very useful in, I would think, a variety of situations. I can't imagine any character that wouldn't want to have one for emergencies.

    Andoran

    Jesse Benner wrote:

    Aura faint transmutation and illusion; CL 5th

    Slot neck (see below); Price 750 gp; Weight -

    DESCRIPTION
    Found across Golarion in the hands of Red Mantis Assassins and Nimrathi forest fighters alike, Snapleaves are a single use magic item, potent for both infiltration and evading escape.
    Carved from crystal to resemble a leaf of any kind, a Snapleaf is worn around the neck although it does not conflict with any other magical item a character might wear on that slot of the body.
    Activating a snap leaf is an immediate action. Once activated the wearer benefits from the effects of both Feather Fall and Invisibility. While the feather fall effect terminates once the wearer touches ground, the invisibility persists for another 5 rounds, or unless the wearer otherwise terminates the effect, per the Invisibility spell.
    If activated when not falling the Snapleaf grants its Invisibility effect for 5 rounds. The Feather Fall effect, however, is wasted and cannot be triggered at a later time.

    CONSTRUCTION
    Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Feather Fall, Invisibility; Cost 375 gp

    I'll be honest--I came back to re-read this item because of your Chaitrakhan submission and all be damned if you don't have a cool item submission TOO. :o)

    RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32 aka Hydro

    Like I said in the Chaitrakhan thread: Cinematic coolness. Jesse knows it.

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