The Thread Celestial

[Celestial Follower]

I'm missing an entire torso filled with souls, so it's not mine.

[Celestial Healer]

*looks in the chest*

GAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
IT HURTS IT HURTS!!!

...

Nope, just a Symbol of Pain, not a Symbol of Strife. I say we sell it on Craigslist.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

No, but I found some axiomatic lint in my belly-button... which was startling, because I never knew I had a belly-button.

{goes back to watching the antics of the Snookies on "The Kashyyyk Shore"}

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

And if you get an email or call from a Ms. Yaga about those souls, don't take any checks from her.

[Celestial Follower]

She turned me into a celestial newt!

[Celestial Healer]

Celestial Follower wrote:

She turned me into a celestial newt!

It was probably for the best.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Celestial Follower wrote:

She turned me into a celestial newt!

Awwww! No one ever applies a monster template to me. {pouts}

[lucky7]

I wish there was Celestial Healing. I have a chest full of those wands, but as the wands don't exist neither do the chest.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Schrödinger's loot drop?

[Celestial Healer]

Pfft. All healing is Celestial. Even the Infernal kind.

[lucky7]

Works for me.

[Celestial Follower]

I got better.

[Celestial Healer]

*looks closely at CF*

*snorts with disapproval*

[Celestial Follower]

Say...coughing up blood is OK if it's not your own blood, right?

[Celestial Healer]

All the Healer Manuals only talk about dealing with people who are coughing up their own, so I guess it's fine.

[Gentleman Nurn]

Oh CF, recently reminded, thanks for the deal on that healing shiv, yeeesssss.

[Celestial Follower]

Um, no problem,GN.

I really need to write down things I lend out. I still haven't gotten the keys to the Gates of Hell back, but I don't remember who I lent them to.

[The_Paladin_of_Nevada]

Walks into the thread wearing in the shiniest plate mail ever made

Am I not beautiful? I shall return to the castle and watch my fellow paladins collapse in utter envy.

[Celestial Healer]

Did he just call me fat?

[The_Paladin_of_Nevada]

NO, I think he called you mentally challenged after a fashion.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Celestial Healer wrote:

Did he just call me fat?

{whispers to Angel Fish's empty fish bowl:} Oh, my, gods.

Fishy, look at his butt.
It is so big....

[Celestial Follower]

The wings confuse everyone, boss.

[Femme Shep]

I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite thread on Paizo.

[Celestial Follower]

Thank you, kind stranger.

Turnip?

[Celestial Healer]

*standing behind CF, waves arms and shakes head "no" to warn Femme Shep*

Oh yes, CF, you have outdone yourself with these turnips.

[The_Paladin_of_Nevada]

Can I fart in my armor or will I offend my patron deity?

[Celestial Follower]

I think you'll find that to be the least of all your transgressions.

[Femme Shep]

What's wrong with turnips? They are great for target practice.

[The_Paladin_of_Nevada]

Femme Shep, turnips give me gas. Now all I need is an artificer and a holy motorcycle.

[Farmer Maggot]

Turnips are parsnips that Fell. Radishes are the pugwampi veggies of indigestion.

What you really want to try are Celestial Follower's stuffed portobellos... shipped in fresh from the farmer's market in Jeharlu just this morning.

{goes back to hunting in the couch cushions for thieving hobbits}

[Celestial Follower]

Funny story: I thought I was ordering pot-bellied pigs.

[Babe: Pig on the Internet]

Oddly, I do get mistaken for an advanced truffle rather frequently.

[Celestial Healer]

I think the mushrooms were an improvement.

[Celestial Follower]

There was that one time I made mushroom clouds, and only the slaads wanted those.

[Celestial Healer]

That was just a byproduct of the enchiladas.

[Celestial Follower]

Last time I go to Taco Bellzebub.

[Celestial Healer]

My heart-shaped box of chocolates contained an actual heart.

[Celestial Follower]

Happy Valentine's Day, boss! I knew you'd like something from the Aztec Store.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

I got a box of chocolate-covered Bette Davis eyes from a secret admirer! {quickly hides receipt from self-purchase}

[Celestial Healer]

How many eyes did she have, anyway?

[lucky7]

Enough.

[Celestial Follower]

A million. Or was that Suzie Maru?

[Celestial Healer]

So Bette Davis was a beholder?

I guess there was good reason for Baby Jane to be afraid.

[Celestial Follower]

Not to mention Baby Ruth...

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Celestial Healer wrote:

So Bette Davis was a beholder?

I guess there was good reason for Baby Jane to be afraid.

So baby was truly in the eye of the beholder?

{groans} I think I ate too much candy...

[Farmer Maggot]

Has anyone seen Charnie this morning? Looks like it wandered off through a hole in the fence again. I gotta get crackin' -- poor Charnie is overdue a milking, and I'm behind on filling orders for Luiren Spring Cheese.

[Celestial Healer]

Farmer Maggot wrote:

Has anyone seen Charnie this morning? Looks like it wandered off through a hole in the fence again. I gotta get crackin' -- poor Charnie is overdue a milking, and I'm behind on filling orders for Luiren Spring Cheese.

OMG. I love that link. About as useless in actual game play as the threadcount on a wizard's robes, but I enjoyed perusing it nonetheless.

[Charnie]

Moo?

[lucky7]

No. No moo.

[Charnie]

Moo!