More turnips!

Yep, seems like more visitors are turn-ing-up everyday! You can't beet it... if you carrot all about that sort of thing.

{hopes no one has Smite Awful Punster as class ability}

Edit: Nakkid maggot?

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

There's a certain paladin I may need your help in translating.

I don't do virgins..,

BAH.

That's HAB spelled backwards.

Mililani Deccubus wrote:

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

There's a certain paladin I may need your help in translating.

I don't do virgins..,

BAH.

Takes her clothes off and wraps a towel around her waist

Don't get any naughty ideas while I'm bathing in the Pool of Eternal Morality. Got it!?!

That's HAB spelled backwards.

Are you feeling OK, boss?

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

Mililani Deccubus wrote:

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

There's a certain paladin I may need your help in translating.

I don't do virgins..,

BAH.

Takes her clothes off and wraps a towel around her waist

Don't get any naughty ideas while I'm bathing in the Pool of Eternal Morality. Got it!?!

Oh that's what that was. I was going to wash my suit, glad I changed my mind.

I thought that was the vomitorium.

EXTRA glad I changed my mind.

Huh. I forgot we had the vomitorium. Now, if I can just remember where the crematorium is...

I thought that was the vomitorium.

Glad I had the filter of purification installed. Now where was I?

sprinkles minty fresh salts and bathing oils of law and proper morality in the waters

Hmmm, Hot Tub Morality Machine? I wonder how John Cusack looks in a celestial badger costume? {begins scribbling notes for screenplay}

It's quiet... too quiet. Someone, somewhere, somewhen, somewhy is plotting something.

*looks up from desk at camera* What are you looking at?

{mutes sound, Alt-Tabs to hide "My Little Badgers: Faceripping is Magic" cartoon on laptop} Ummm, nothing.

I'm just playing Angry Birds: Abyssal Edition.

If you win that, do the pigs turn into smoked bacon?

Those aren't pigs! I speak from experience.

What did they taste like?

Like a McRib and a KFC Double Down had a baby.

That's like a (failure pile in a sadness bowl)^2. How many milliJoffrys does that work out to?

Mmm. Turnips.

Turnips are a gateway vegetable to the harder, more addictive root vegetables. The link was exposed in the 1936 documentary, Rutabaga Madness.

They called me mad once.

Well you shouldn't have made Angel Fish into fishsticks.

Could I interest you all in some cabbages?

CF, what can you make out of cabbages?

A hat!

Make it so.

Done!

It... it's beautiful...!

Celestial Healer wrote:

Celestial Follower wrote:

Celestial Healer wrote:

CF, what can you make out of cabbages?

A hat!

Make it so.

Done!

{blushes, hides naughty vegetables}

This thread just turned smutty.

Quickly gentlemen, bring in the turkey! We carnivores need to eat too, yeeesssss.

CF, how is that feast coming?

The Thanksgiving Possum is almost done!

It's already Friday. That thing has got to be cooked by now. How are the turnips coming?

It's done! I like the way it's still grimacing even after spending all that time in the oven.

Plus, I've decided to go with bacon instead of turnips this year.

I approve of this, yeeesssssss.

Are we sure this over-roasted possum is really dead and not just faking it? I don't want it squirming on my plate.

The bacon is pure win.

Allow me to carve the roast beast. It'll be dead one way or the other.

Go right ahead!

<Hands Gentleman Nurn a running chainsaw>

Eeeeeeeexcellent.

*carves with gusto*

*sits up and begs for some possum*

Ugh. Some flea or tick must have carried in a poodle. {sprays DDT on Cockapoo} I hope I got him before he started a poodle infestation.

Could be worse... could be a spiderbear infestation like the one that happened across the street.

{pounds on window} JACK! CHRISSY! JANET! Please let me in... there are giant spi- AUUUUUUUUUUUGH!!!!!!!! {violently dragged underground by unseen creature}

Heh. We didn't have enough food for that guy anyway.

Ugh. Some flea or tick must have carried in a poodle. {sprays DDT on Cockapoo} I hope I got him before he started a poodle infestation.

YIPE YIPE! YIPE! *runs out of the thread*

One of those spiderbears keeps trying to steal my picnic basket!

Now we've got goliath etherfish in the swimming pool. Maybe we can get Angel Fish to talk to them and ask them to leave.
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Oh...right...