Angry Spirit's #35 rejection


Society Scenario Submissions

Dark Archive

This was submitted by myself and a friend, he is more the writer and I a designer. Both of us have GMed for more years than I can remember. Think my first module I played was the monochrome In Search of the Unknown so yes, I am old.

Have a look, tell me what you think. I would like to thank you in advance and hope our senario helps others in their own quest to contribute to the community.

I will post a reply later of the things I learned from Josh. I still have to find all my notes.

Spoiler:

From the Age before recorded history, mankind has gazed with wonder and awe at the stars shining within the Dark Tapestry. Our ancient forefathers were certain in the belief that their beauty and wonder contained the very secrets of the gods themselves. But the wisdom of the stars is not a goal for the faint of heart, as the darkness between the points of light are often filled with dangers more terrifying than the deepest abyss.

It has been many years since Ralzeros; an eccentric archmage, searched the Dark Tapestry for secrets and forbidden knowledge. It was during the years of searching that he built his basalt observatory that would one day become the Blakros Museum. It was also during this time that his quest brought him to the attention of a Lashunta of the Nika-Dalmous clan of distant Castrovel, the Green. This clan of powerful psionicists had long sought for a way to exploit Golarion for their own ends, and corrupting Ralzeros, became the first step in their quest for power and domination. Eventually, Ralzeros was slain, but not before he had secretly created new agents for his Castrovel Mistress, the family that would come to be known as Blakros.

Descended from Ralzeros, bred with an ability to hear the distant voices from Castrovel and to entice the men of many lands with their beauty, the Daughters of Blakros slowly expanded their influence beyond Absalom. Over the years, the beautiful Daughters of Blakros married into the nobility of many lands, gathered wealth and secrets from beyond the Inner Sea and slowly fulfilled the wishes of the Voice from the Void.

When the mad Pathfinder, Lugizar Trantos arrived from distant Numeria with a crate for the Blakros Museum, he muttered “And so my oath is fulfilled.” before slipping into a coma, the Society became concerned. When shortly afterwards, the numerous Daughters of Blakros began to return to Absalom, sending Nigel Aldain away to far off Varisia, and closed the doors of the often haunted museum, that concern became worry.

The Daughters are now having a massive celebration in their Absalom mansion, and have left only a skeletal staff at their many properties. What is happening behind the walls of the Blakros Museum, and who can discover the secrets of the Daughters of Blakros before they complete their ultimate goal?

The Nika-Dalmous have made a pact with the Demon Lord Cyth V’sug, and are using its magic to protect the Seeds that the Daughters have collected. The Seeds are to be sent via the Arkall to Castrovel. Their plan is to use the Seeds to create an undistinguishable human/plant hybrid that they will use to subvert the powerful nations of Golarion.

Rooms
1 Blakros Museum - Before Nigel leaves for Varisia he tells the Society that the Daughter have been spending a lot of effort working on the basalt floor of the North Exhibit Hall. He gave the Society a key to the museum’s front doors and warned them that something is afoot. The ziggurat on display in the North Hall has been moved back, exposing an opening in the basalt floor. Stairs lead down into the darkness below.
Enc1- Guardian (Alien) Tier 1 Vegapygmy x3 (EL2)/ Tier 2 Grick (EL 4) / Tier 3 Gibbering Mouther (EL 6)
2 Entrance Chamber – Enc2 Trapped stairs (EL 1-4) lead down to the Entrance Chamber.
Barren Sentinel – Not all the children of Blakros have the temperament or ability to become a true “Daughter”. Those found lacking for any reason are sterilized, and become Barren Sentinels. These beautiful but deranged daughters are turned into enraged guardians of the families holdings.
Enc3 Guardian Tier 1 Barren Sentinel (EL3)/ Tier 2 Barren Sentinel (EL 6) / Tier 3 Barren Sentinel (EL 7)
3 Incubation Chamber – The seeds gathered by the Daughters from the nobles of distant lands have been placed within the moist and nourishing earthen walls of this room to incubate. The “Seeds” are a mix of human and plant, and are nurtured in soil that is fed by demonic grubs and spores provided by Cyth V’sug. (Cheliax Goal)
4 Disposal Chamber – “Seeds” that are not viable are disposed of here. This is also the room where the Vegapygmy’s are grown from the Otyugh guano that is left after it consumes the discarded Seeds.
Enc4 Guardian - Castrovel Otyugh – (variant) Tier 1 (EL2)/ Tier 2 (EL 4) / Tier 3 (EL 6)
5 Preparation Chamber – The room is filled with alchemical and thaumaturgical equipment. Seeds are being encased within a viscous shell to protect them during their upcoming transfer through the Arkall to Castrovel. Once a Seed is prepared it is placed within a special cask and taken to the Arkall.
- Enc5 Castroval Astral Obelisk which details the pending astral alignment which the Daughters are going to use to help power the Arkall, and transfer the various Seed and information to the Nika-Dalmous Matriarch. EL4 (optional) (Sarenrae Ankh used as the symbol for the sun – Osirian Goal)
-Enc6 Guardian – Tier 1 Barren Sentinel (EL3)/ Tier 2 Barren Sentinel (EL 6) / Tier 3 Lashunta Agent (EL 7) and Enc7 Vegapygmy servitors who can be called from the Arkall room.
Information found within the Preperation Chamber also includes a record of which noble families / races were the source of each seed. Taldor, Andoran Goal.
6 Arkall– A vast circular room is dominated by ring of metal, suspended over a pile of Seed Casks. The ring of metal is held aloft by 4 stout chains. Attached to the metal ring is the Electro-Thaumaturgical device that Lugizar Trantos brought back from Numeria. ( Qadiran Goal)
Success
If the party is able to prevent the activation of the Arkall, they will have succeeded. The Pathfinder Society learns of a new threat and can warn their factions of the Blakros plot. Blakros influence will prevent the family from being totally discredited.
Failure
The Seed Casks are sent to Castroval, where they are grown to become Nika-Dalmous spies.

Dark Archive

Tidbits on Submissions I have learned.

1. Never use a ";"

2. Spell all your proper names correctly if referencing from pre released products.

3. Never pass up a chance to tie in some other Paizo product with the scenario. Game maps, item cards or reference book. It helps GMs be more well- rounded on any given scenario, creates surrealism to the campaign setting and may cut down on development time of a map.

4. Venture-Captain was hyphenated and only upper case when used with a proper name.

5. Less fluff, more meat. Fluff is good, but not with the proposal. Be straight and to the point. Get to the point. Clearly define the encounters.

6. Josh mentioned no "retirement home for dragons" scenarios. At first I did not know what this meant. In my home game, I use a lot of wit or sometimes comedy to break up tension to a serious evening of gaming. I do not think the direction of the scenarios is comedy based.

7. A lot of what I heard coming from several of the designers was the “Indiana Jones” concept. If you think it would make a good Indiana Jones sequel, it may be a good scenario idea.

8. Write well, be accurate, use your knowledge of the game to branch out and design a new feat, or a template to add to the monsters or even a new condition code. Developing new ideas along with clever story will help you stand out.

9. This is the most important thing I have learned. Learn from every failure and never give up trying. I spoke with Larcifer who told me it took him four submissions of his before he was accepted. Success is built upon the wisdom of past losses.

Hope this helps. Good luck in your submission writing.

Grand Lodge

A good summary, Ancient Spirit.

I would modify 2 of them.

5. While avoiding fluff, be sure to give Society motivations, clear overview, etc. My submission went into detail on all of the encounters, but lacked sufficient backstory/summary type information.

7. An Indiana Jones type adventure is perfect, but remember that the PFS is more likely to resemble Belloq than Jones.

Dark Archive

Scribbling Rambler wrote:

A good summary, Ancient Spirit.

7. An Indiana Jones type adventure is perfect, but remember that the PFS is more likely to resemble Belloq than Jones.

While I understood where Josh was going with that,Belloq in the end did not have enough levels in cleric and therefore perished :) I wouldnt want pathfinder characters to die as horribly as he did in the movie...

Grand Lodge

AngrySpirit wrote:
Scribbling Rambler wrote:

A good summary, Ancient Spirit.

7. An Indiana Jones type adventure is perfect, but remember that the PFS is more likely to resemble Belloq than Jones.

While I understood where Josh was going with that,Belloq in the end did not have enough levels in cleric and therefore perished :) I wouldnt want pathfinder characters to die as horribly as he did in the movie...

I would rather get myself killed by a melted face from avenging angels than die from a stupid freaking giant water bug. A WATER BUG! A freaking TPK from a WATER BUG!

face melting sounds much better

oh and we had NO clerics...

after that scenario we now have three clerics!

Dark Archive

Krome wrote:


I would rather get myself killed by a melted face from avenging angels than die from a stupid freaking giant water bug. A WATER BUG! A freaking TPK from a WATER BUG!

Think the worst death I had ever seen was from a homebrew elemental made from a corn crop. The player walked out into the field and we found him dead with corn cobs stuck in unmentionable places. The player never showed his face again. Think the GM said it was an illusion later on that killed him...

No wait, a player died once by trying to climb down a 80' cliff holding a bull's eye lantern. He slipped, and survived with 3Hps. The GM rolled to hit because the bull's eye lantern fell after him. it hit and killed him. It was a bloody mess.

Grand Lodge

lol oh man that would SOOO suck! No chance for a Reflex Save or anything just in case?

I like the part about the movie sequel a lot. I'm writing an adventure now (a freaking long one) that I am trying to design more as a movie. I even use Acts and Scenes as my chapters and encounters.

I decided not to submit my stuff to the Society because I want to explore a different presentation than what Paizo and WOTC have done. This thing will be 100% PDF (and free) so I am allowing it to go real long. For encounters you would find the full stat block for each monster you need, right there at that encounter. While the GM is always free to adapt the encounter to his needs, I am also including suggestions for tactics and play. The goal is the GM will not need anything other than the adventure to run the scenario (the sole exception being spells- you'll need to have your spells).

Someday I will likely submit scenarios to Society, but right now too busy developing my own thing. There is, afterall, more than one wy to skin an elf!

Liberty's Edge

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AngrySpirit wrote:
Krome wrote:


I would rather get myself killed by a melted face from avenging angels than die from a stupid freaking giant water bug. A WATER BUG! A freaking TPK from a WATER BUG!

Think the worst death I had ever seen was from a homebrew elemental made from a corn crop. The player walked out into the field and we found him dead with corn cobs stuck in unmentionable places. The player never showed his face again. Think the GM said it was an illusion later on that killed him...

No wait, a player died once by trying to climb down a 80' cliff holding a bull's eye lantern. He slipped, and survived with 3Hps. The GM rolled to hit because the bull's eye lantern fell after him. it hit and killed him. It was a bloody mess.

What a bad GMing job. seriously?! That happened?

If he was holding it when he fell, wouldn't it be considered "equipt" and therefore part and parcel of said "falling damage"? He would no more take damage from it that he would his other "equipt" items, like weapons, backpack, etc. It's part of the damage "calculations".
Sounds like the GM was out to "win" to me.

One of my "basic" GM rules : Heroes do not die ignoble deaths unless they work to deserve it. Accidents of dice rolling happen, do not punish the player for it.

Now the elemental situation just sounds funny and gross all at the same time. heh

Sovereign Court

Also why did the lantern fall "after him"? Objects don't fall faster if they are heavier.

Dark Archive

Grimdell wrote:

What a bad GMing job. seriously?! That happened?

If he was holding it when he fell, wouldn't it be considered "equipt" and therefore part and parcel of said "falling damage"? He would no more take damage from it that he would his other "equipt" items, like weapons, backpack, etc. It's part of the damage "calculations".
Sounds like the GM was out to "win" to me.

It was in 1989 and second edition had just came out. This was the wild west days of gaming and it wasnt some years later before book on "how to be a good GM" were written :)

Grimdell wrote:
One of my "basic" GM rules : Heroes do not die ignoble deaths unless they work to deserve it. Accidents of dice rolling happen, do not punish the player for it.

I agree with you.

Grimdell wrote:
Now the elemental situation just sounds funny and gross all at the same time. heh

It was funny at the time but the player took it as the GM was picking on him. The game lost a player that day to a bad call at the table. This also was under second edition rules, think it was "programmed illusion". The corn effect was supposed to be a subtle hint to disbelieve.

Liberty's Edge

...ah, yes, I remember those days.... and even bofore then ... It was more like sailing to the New World Days... Powers + Perils anyone? ;-P

I really shouldn't have said it the way I did anyhow. It really shouldn't be a "personal attack" directed at a given GM. I know better, but was having a bad day, sorry.

I thank you for your recieving it the way you did, mostly never happens that way, IME.

It is bad when you lose a player over one event, but if it is explained and all the other players could understand it, then it sounds more like one player you might not have wanted... food for thought? ...


AngrySpirit wrote:
6. Josh mentioned no "retirement home for dragons" scenarios. At first I did not know what this meant. In my home game, I use a lot of wit or sometimes comedy to break up tension to a serious evening of gaming. I do not think the direction of the scenarios is comedy based.

The place was Gen Con 2006. Paizo was still publishing Dungeon Magazine and Pathfinder was not yet a twinkle in their eye. The Paizo staff led a seminar where participants collaboratively designed an adventure. The result:

A retirement home for heroes run by a dragon

I don't remember all the details clearly, but the general idea was that the dragon had gathered many high-level, retired adventures and provided a safe retreat brimming with animated objects and living spells as servants and bountiful illusions to keep them entertained. The dragon could have been observing the adventurers to understand their past adventures, learn their current secrets, or because they had some role to play in future events. It was assumed that the party would travel to the retirement home to make contact with one of the adventurers, would discover a third party secretly sabotaging the facility, and would be rewarded with titles or other unusual treasure if they succeeded.

Ever since that seminar Josh has used a retirement home for dragons as an example of the type of adventure Paizo does not want to write.

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