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Pathfinder Roleplaying Game: GameMastery Guide (OGL)

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Pathfinder Roleplaying Game: GameMastery Guide (OGL)
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Rule Your World!

Players may be the heroes of the Pathfinder Roleplaying Game, but whole worlds rest on the Game Master's shoulders. Fortunately for GMs, the Pathfinder RPG GameMastery Guide is here to back you up. Packed with invaluable hints and information, this book contains everything you need to take your game to the next level, from advice on the nuts and bolts of running a session to the greater mysteries of crafting engaging worlds and storylines. Whether you've run one game or a thousand, this book has page after page of secrets to make you sharper, faster, and more creative, while always staying one step ahead of your players.

The 320-page Pathfinder RPG GameMastery Guide is a must-have companion volume to the Pathfinder RPG Core Rulebook. This imaginative tabletop game builds upon more than 10 years of system development and an Open Playtest featuring more than 50,000 gamers to create a cutting-edge RPG experience that brings the all-time best-selling set of fantasy rules into the new millennium.

The Pathfinder RPG GameMastery Guide includes:

  • Tips and tricks for preparing and running a better game, suitable for beginning GMs and battle-hardened veterans.
  • Step-by-step walkthroughs for creating campaign worlds, cities, cosmologies, feudal systems, and alternate dimensions.
  • Difficult player types, and how to handle them gracefully.
  • New rules for subsystems like hauntings, chase scenes, fortune-telling, gambling games, mysteries, and insanity.
  • Charts to help you generate everything from interesting NPCs and fantastic treasures to instant encounters in any terrain.
  • Advanced topics such as PC death, game-breaking rules, overpowered parties, solo campaigns, and derailed storylines.
  • Sample NPC statistics for dozens of common adventuring situations, such as cultists, guardsmen, barmaids, and pirates.
  • ... and much, much more!

ISBN-13: 978-1-60125-217-3

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Last Updated - 1/22/2014

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Essential for New GMs, Handy for Veterans

5/5 —

Published back in 2009, the GameMastery Guide was one of the early hardcover books released for Pathfinder. I think it's an overlooked gem, as I crack it open before and during sessions as often as any book other than the Core Rulebook. Weighing in at a hefty 320 pages, the GameMastery Guide has advice on the usual topics that new GMs need help with, but it also contains so much more, like little new rules subsystems, a gallery of pre-made NPCs, all sorts of random tables, tracking sheets, etc. It's a very handy compilation of material specifically designed for Pathfinder, and I'd recommend it as an early purchase for any GM getting into the game.

We have to start with a shout-out to that awesome cover, featuring Runelord Karzoug seated on his throne. I'm partial, since I'm running a certain AP at the moment, but artist Wayne Reynolds knocked it out of the park there. There's no way the interior artwork could be as good, and it's true that many of the interstitial drawings are recycled from other products or are forgettable placeholders. However, the artwork accompanying the NPC gallery is solid and fits the feel of Golarion. If I were using letter ratings, the cover art would get an A+ and the interior art and layout would get a C+.

The book is divided into 9 chapters, with multiple appendices and indices.

Chapter 1, "Getting Started", is stuff that experienced GMs will have seen a thousand times before, but that new GMs will appreciate. It covers stuff like a gaming glossary, how to deal with sensitive topics, how to find players and set aside a place to play, developing house rules, etc. It's standard advice, and if I had to quibble with anything it's that the section is so focussed on catering to players' desires that it leaves out a crucial consideration: the GM needs to have fun too! I did like the idea of creating a custom player's guide before each new campaign, and that's something I'll probably do in the future.

Chapter 2, "Running the Game", talks about preparation, presentation (music, handouts, lighting, etc.), building encounters and adventures, and how to handle in-game problems (PCs missing a clue, getting too much treasure, etc.). Again, it's all solid advice (though I don't agree with customising encounters for PC abilities, as that holds the risk of undermining the very advantages they've worked to gain). I think the best bit in the chapter is the "Game Changers" section, with talks about how to handle problems specific to Pathfinder: spells involving invisibility, teleportation, lie/evil detection, flying, auguries, and more. These spells can dramatically change the game and wreck certain types of plots if a GM isn't careful. The section ends with some good tables: fifty different adventure plots, twenty plot twists, and a bunch of macguffins. Good material if you're creating your own adventures and get stuck in the brainstorming.

Chapter 3, "Player Characters," talks about handling metagaming, introducing new players into the game, handling treasure and character death, whether to allow evil PCs, and different types of common players like the "One-Trick Pony" and the "Rules Lawyer". It's a good and useful discussion, as experienced GMs will encounter these various player types sooner or later and knowing what to look out for and handle them is important if groups are going to persist in the long-run. I think what the chapter is missing is the frank advice that some players just aren't right for some groups, some groups are dysfunctional and need to disband, and that the GM (unfortunately) often has to make the hard calls. It's a responsibility that goes beyond preparing and running adventures, since real people, real relationships, and real emotions can be involved. I'd rank the chapter as average.

Chapter 4, "Nonplayer Characters," goes into the basics of giving NPCs personalities and roles in the game. I especially liked the section on traps a GM needs to avoid when running NPCs (such as making them too intrusive, too decisive, too good at combat, etc.). The section introduces a new concept of "NPC Boons," which are special little plot or mechanical advantages that NPCs of different types can give to PCs. We'll see this concept more in the NPC Gallery at the end of the book, but the idea would be that, for example, befriending a local tracker would give the PCs a +2 on Survival checks in the area for one month, or that buying a drink for a down-on-his-luck nobleman could result in a primer on local politics and a +2 bonus on Knowledge (nobility) in the city. Etc. It's a nice way to quantify and reward PCs for good role-playing and encourage those players who are only in it for the bottom line to have more patience with what may at first seem like irrelevant asides. After some fairly mundane advice on villains, the chapter concludes with a great collection of tables: NPC backgrounds, goals, physical characteristics, personality characteristics (some of these are hilarious and memorable, and I wish players were as creative!), occupations, secrets and rewards, and even the surely-delightful "Random Adventuring Party Name Generator". If you want to be cool, join the "Reputable Pearly Kraken Monster-Slayers in the Shadow of Angels"!

Chapter 5, "Rewards," contains an insightful discussion of why rewards manner and the different ways they can be conceptualised and allocated. It goes through the difference between steady small rewards versus occasional big ones, intrinsic vs. extrinsic rewards, and how different players value different things (e.g., is it all about the gold, or is getting on a first-name basis with the barmaid better?). It even gets into little details, such as exactly when XP can be awarded (I forget that some groups do it after every single encounter, while others only do it during true in-game downtime). There's some good advice on how to handle spell research and magic item crafting that makes it clear the whole process needs to be treated more as an art than a mechanical formula. This chapter has a *lot* of random item and random magic item tables, which is really useful when you need to see what a little shop in a small town happens to have in stock, or what that NPC wizard you weren't expecting the PCs to rob from has in his satchel.

Chapter 6, "Creating a World," is for GMs who do something I've never really done in Pathfinder (though I have in science fiction settings): create a brand new campaign setting. It has a nice process of answering a set list of questions to gradually firm up the details of the new world and to simplify (to some degree) the difficulty of conceptualising everything all at once. The geography advice is probably over-ambitious, but the concepts are explained really well. The chapter goes through different types of societies and different technological levels. It's not a chapter I'll use, but it's very good for homebrew GMs.

Chapter 7, "Adventures," has tips for running stories in different environments (dungeons, the wilderness, etc.). It has particularly good advice on dungeons, with a useful key to map symbols that I should use more often. Again, there's a ton of great tables to stimulate creativity, including random tables on where dungeons can be found, what type they are, what's in different rooms, and several random monster encounter tables (which I wouldn't actually roll on, as they have the common problem of spreading CRs from as low as 1 to as high as 13 in the same table!). The chapter has a section on planes and planar traits, which is an important reference for later products that make specific use of the mechanics presented here. Similarly, it has a section on stat blocks for settlements (used in most Pathfinder products) that is quite important in determining what's for sale in a community, the highest-level of spellcaster available, etc. I use the settlement rules a lot, and although I think they're sometimes a bit cumbersome in play, they're important in making sure that a hamlet "acts" differently than a metropolis. This chapter is packed with a lot of other material, including a two-page rules-set for ship combat (it seems worth trying), lots of random tables for ships and sailors, and, one of my favourite things, random tables for tavern names and unique traits. There's a lot here that I'm going to photocopy and keep with my GM screen to help me quickly come up with more flavourful interludes when I'm running games.

Chapter 8, "Advanced Topics," introduces several new little rules sub-systems: chases (elegant, but not completely satisfying), natural disasters, drugs and addiction (happens too quickly and needs a slower progression of effects), fortune-telling (too general), gambling (done well), haunts (one of the best innovations of Pathfinder, great for story-telling), hazards (mostly supernatural ones, but very clever), and sanity/madness (too simplistic, but not bad for just 2 pages). Some of these sub-systems, like chases and haunts, are seen in a lot of other Paizo products, so having the rules on how to run them is really useful. Other topics touched on in this chapter have been developed in far more detail elsewhere, and may be of more limited usefulness. Still, there's enough of enduring value to make the material here worth reading.

Chapter 9, "NPC Gallery", is one of those things every Pathfinder GM needs: full stats (and even pictures and descriptions) for NPCs encountered on short notice: bandits to spice up overland travel, city guards for when the "Chaotic Stupid" PC gets too obnoxious, the bard intended purely as tavern-dressing that the PCs are surprisingly interested in, the shopkeep they want to try to bluff for a discount, etc. There are dozens and dozens of great NPCs here, both low-level "townsfolk" and high-level threats, and all are fully fleshed out with gear and boons (from Chapter 4). In addition, there's really good advice on how to swap out a feat here or a weapon there to create different variations on the stock NPC. I've used this chapter a lot (as have many PFS scenarios). The later publication of the NPC Codex and Villain Codex makes this section slightly less crucial, but I still get a lot of use out of it.

Apart from indices and an appendix (on recommend reading and films), the book ends with a miscellany of tracking sheets--a Campaign Sheet, a Settlement Sheet (something I should actually use, now that I think of it), an NPC Sheet, and a Basic Rules Cheat Sheet (that I'm going to start handing out to new players to ease their transition into the game).

From the chapter summaries above, you can tell the book is just chock-full of useful advice and resources for running the game. Although essential for new GMs, even experienced ones will still find a lot here to make the book worth buying and reading.

Right Next To The Core Rulebook On My Shelf!

5/5 —

This product was amazing. I was blown away by the advice given to create a world and how to deal with several issues that have come up in recent gaming sessions. The crunchy side of the book was OK, but I really haven't had any need to pull out those rules and use them in my games. I overall really enjoyed this product, and can't wait to see what comes next!

The Essential Tome of GM'ing

5/5 —

This pearl of GM manuals should be found from every already practising or aspiring-to-be GM's collection. Yes, it's that great, even for folks who don't run Pathfinder. Well written, easy to understand, beautiful to look at... not to mention a well of inspiration it also achieves to be. It's a near perfect package of knowledge how to run smooth, richer, better RPG campaign. Sure, there are chunks of system specific stuff inside, but the most important bits of knowledge of how to run your game are universal and will fit in any system and game table. For juniors, it is essential. For the vets, well, if you're already good at what you're doing, you can always be better, and perhaps you're not perfect and can learn at least one useful new trick out of it.

Great addition

4/5 —

Read the book cover to cover. Although most of it is repetition for old-time gm's I like the style, flavour and content of the book. It's pure inspiration and also a few goodies that are easily put to work: chases, hazards, haunts - now tried out with success in my current campaign.

A bit to many references to the Core Rulebook annoys a bit.

As a veteran GM thus book left me pining for alot more

3/5 —

Honestly this book is not at all needed if you have any GM experience at all. Has some good world creation tips but otherwise feels overly simplistic. My opinion would change greatly on this book if I was new to gaming however.

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It looks like the Kingmaker adventure path will be getting some mass combat rules which is great, is there any plans to include naval combat or ship rules in this book or any other book on the horizon?
Dark Archive

Just realized it got pushed back. :-(

So what amazing product has been put in its February slot?
Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer
dm4hire wrote:

Just realized it got pushed back. :-(

So what amazing product has been put in its February slot?

We haven't added any products—we're just taking the time to do this right.

Dark Archive
Vic Wertz wrote:
dm4hire wrote:

Just realized it got pushed back. :-(

So what amazing product has been put in its February slot?

We haven't added any products—we're just taking the time to do this right.

And this is why we (your devoted fans) love you guys. The level of quality of work is simply unparalleled. I would rather wait an extra 30 days for a great book that im going to use for 10+ years then have that much sooner for an okay book.

Dark Archive
DragonBringerX wrote:
Vic Wertz wrote:
dm4hire wrote:

Just realized it got pushed back. :-(

So what amazing product has been put in its February slot?

We haven't added any products—we're just taking the time to do this right.
And this is why we (your devoted fans) love you guys. The level of quality of work is simply unparalleled. I would rather wait an extra 30 days for a great book that im going to use for 10+ years then have that much sooner for an okay book.

Hear hear! I have been totally blown away with the PF RPG core rulebook and the Bestiary, and on top of it all (having been so disappointed in most 3E supplements) I thought that APG simply couldn't add ANYTHING I would like or need or care about to the game -- however, having seen the playtest previews, I must confess that it appears I was wrong. Jason & The Paizo Design Team has NOT lost any "steam", and it looks like Paizo will actually EXPAND on the existing mechanics in innovative and exciting ways! If it means a few extra months of "polishing", I'm totally cool with that -- better that it will be done "right" than release something that is in serious need of houseruling/revision/errata. So, by all means take your time with GMG and APG! :)

Sounds great, I will definitely get a copy in 2010.

What I would also like to see in this book:


  • basic adventure design principles with level-dependent facts to consider; for example 'flight becomes available to PCs at level 5'
  • tips how to handle higher-level PC's abilities; for example 'how to set up challenging mystery plots after scry/commune become available'
  • tables with easy, challenging and hard DCs depending on PC level; makes it easier for a DM to set appropriate ad-hoc DCs for special situations

Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.

Then we can thank god we have 2!!

Preorder so far away....

I like everything I've read in the product description so far...

one additional thing I'd like to see is GM advice on how to create balanced prestige classes.

I dropped out of D&D after 3rd edition but before 3.5, so I don't know if this topic has been addressed anywhere else in the past. Moot point even if it was since we're talking about Pathfinder here, not D&D.

But I personally have a lot of ideas kickin around in me noggins for some prestige classes, but I sure could use some professional advice on how to make them balanced and playable and workable and fun and entertaining for me games, you know? :P

I have yet to find a G/DMG that really shows a person how to create a decent story. Plot, Conflict, etc. I have very little imagination when it comes to this kind of thing. Even if there's just a little chapter with tables that you can roll off of would be nice.

Just my 2 cp.

I would like a sentient book that understands everything about the universe and focuses it all down onto where I need the most help shoring up my DMing techniques! Yeah. Hyperlinked and with a plug-in to disguise gamer funk from players please.

;)

Seeing what Paizo has given us so far I am really looking forward to this one. I can't wait to see what they compile in here for us.
Dark Archive

I hope there will be pre-made encounters that feature terrain effects as well -- during the last session it took me some digging (in the middle of a combat) to find all the relevant rules and modifiers when someone asked "Can I charge or run in this forest, or do I need to roll an Acrobatics check? Does it cost two squares if I just move?".

I'd really, REALLY appreciate it if there would be a desert, forest, underwater, swamp, etc. encounter (one for each terrain, that is) that dealt with terrain modifiers and how to apply them; for example, "each creature can roll percentile dice to see if that square contains a tree" and "If someone uses Stealth...". Maybe these encounters could even list the most common skill checks associated with that terrain? It would be much more helpful than flipping between the skill and environment sections in the book when you're running, say, a combat in a cavern (with a slippery, uneven floor with several "levels" that require Climb checks to travel between) that features an underground river and a lake, plus half the combatants are making attacks from water against land-bound opponents who are taking cover behind stalacmites.

Anyway, just some thoughts. :)
Dark Archive

I didn't/couldn't read every post on this product, but did someone pipe up about rules dealing with high-level (12-13+ level) games/campaigns? Is is that covered under "broken"?
Silver Crusade
Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

12-13 is OK, I consider it still mid-level. Stuff gets wonky at lvls 16+.
Paizo Employee Creative Director
eirip wrote:
I love the cover art. Is that going to be the final cover?

It's the final art, yes. The look of the cover could still change, but that should be pretty close.

Silver Crusade
Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Is there any chance for a full author list ? From what I've gathered, apart from the Paizo staff there are several freelancers on the project - Jason Nelson, Hal McLean and Richard "M'naaaar" Pett as far as I remember. Who else is contributing to the GMG ?

Also, kudos for this book Paizo. Anything you do for time-starved DMs is great.
Contributor

Mnaaaaaaar
Contributor, RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16

Mr. P is back!
Paizo Employee Creative Director
Gorbacz wrote:

Is there any chance for a full author list ? From what I've gathered, apart from the Paizo staff there are several freelancers on the project - Jason Nelson, Hal McLean and Richard "M'naaaar" Pett as far as I remember. Who else is contributing to the GMG ?

Also, kudos for this book Paizo. Anything you do for time-starved DMs is great.

We'll probably be announcing the full author list at some point. Not yet, though! :)

Hal Maclean wrote:
Mr. P is back!

HUZZAH!

If I preorder, will I get the pdf for free?
Scarab Sages
Twin Agate Dragons wrote:
If I preorder, will I get the pdf for free?

You have to be a subscriber to get the free PDF

DragonBelow wrote:
Twin Agate Dragons wrote:
If I preorder, will I get the pdf for free?
You have to be a subscriber to get the free PDF

Did they change it then? I know paizo gave away the core rulebook and bestiary to those that pre-ordered.

Silver Crusade
Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Erm, nope. There was no such promo - you had to subscribe to the RPG line in order to get the PDF.
Paizo Employee Director of Brand Strategy
Gorbacz wrote:
Erm, nope. There was no such promo - you had to subscribe to the RPG line in order to get the PDF.

Yup, but if you preordered and then subscribed, your preorder was converted automagically into the subscription. Perhaps that's the cause of the confusion?

Contributor

My dear chaps and chapesses, Erik and James came down to let me out only yesterday. I've been locked in a moist chamber in the northern Marshes of Finland, with a steady drip drip drip until I completed Thousand Screams.

There are quite a few of my own screams in there, lots of screams in fact.

Screams.

Screams!

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

The Night!

The NIGHT!

Can't wait to see the gamemastery book to see what goodies we can unleash in the future.

Now, back to your cells cupcakes!

Slithers off to yorkshire.
Silver Crusade
Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Now I know why one could hear a faint scream in the howling northern wind lately ... Mr. Pett was writing his adventure.
Dark Archive
Richard Pett wrote:

My dear chaps and chapesses, Erik and James came down to let me out only yesterday. I've been locked in a moist chamber in the northern Marshes of Finland, with a steady drip drip drip until I completed Thousand Screams.

There are quite a few of my own screams in there, lots of screams in fact.

Screams.

Screams!

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

The Night!

The NIGHT!

Can't wait to see the gamemastery book to see what goodies we can unleash in the future.

Now, back to your cells cupcakes!

Slithers off to yorkshire.

So it *was* you I have heard howling in the chamber next to mine, during the cold, dark nights! I *thought* I recognised the desperate, otherworldly cries and incoherent sobbing, but I assumed it was only the North Wind or those damned Imps playing tricks with my own deranged mind. Good to know I still have some shreds of sanity and reasoning left! Having said that... I hope you enjoyed your stay in Finland, where the ideals and spirit of Cheliax reign supreme! ;)

Richard Pett wrote:

My dear chaps and chapesses, Erik and James came down to let me out only yesterday. I've been locked in a moist chamber in the northern Marshes of Finland, with a steady drip drip drip until I completed Thousand Screams.

I really hope you didn't met her

Scarab Sages
Richard Pett wrote:

My dear chaps and chapesses, Erik and James came down to let me out only yesterday. I've been locked in a moist chamber in the northern Marshes of Finland, with a steady drip drip drip until I completed Thousand Screams.

Slithers off to Yorkshire.

{Fixed that for you; it's upper case, when you refer to the home of England's capital city...}

Slithers is right, or maybe Squelches.

Thanks to the recent blizzards and the sudden thaw, I hope you brought your bog-snorkelling kit.
Contributor
Snorter wrote:
Richard Pett wrote:

My dear chaps and chapesses, Erik and James came down to let me out only yesterday. I've been locked in a moist chamber in the northern Marshes of Finland, with a steady drip drip drip until I completed Thousand Screams.

Slithers off to Yorkshire.

{Fixed that for you; it's upper case, when you refer to the home of England's capital city...}

Slithers is right, or maybe Squelches.

Thanks to the recent blizzards and the sudden thaw, I hope you brought your bog-snorkelling kit.

Ah, but I was in Rotherham, and that's surely yorkshire

Squelches is right, I hope you have some ranks in swim.

Huzzah!
Contributor
Cormac wrote:
Richard Pett wrote:

My dear chaps and chapesses, Erik and James came down to let me out only yesterday. I've been locked in a moist chamber in the northern Marshes of Finland, with a steady drip drip drip until I completed Thousand Screams.

I really hope you didn't met her

Nice stuff cormac, alas all I got was vaughn in drag, singing down at the old bull and bush in baratone.

it says May, but i thought i heard at a gaming store it was supposed to hit shelves in march...or is that a different book?
Dark Archive
nicholas mork wrote:
it says May, but i thought i heard at a gaming store it was supposed to hit shelves in march...or is that a different book?

If I understood correctly, they pushed back the release date to "get it right" (i.e. some parts of the book still needed to be polished). And I'm glad that they did it -- it shows how dedicated to producing quality Paizo really is! :)

hmm... additional advanced rules for sanity and hauntings, you say?

cooooll

i personally like a little chocolate with my peanut bu... uh, i mean, horror with my fantasy.
Shadow Lodge
SamuraiSpirit wrote:

hmm... additional advanced rules for sanity and hauntings, you say?

cooooll

i personally like a little chocolate with my peanut bu... uh, i mean, horror with my fantasy.

Only makes sense, what with the relatively heavy Lovecraft influence on Golarion.

Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.

I hear you can get $90,000 for a testicle. And with roleplaying being almost as expensive a habit as hard drugs, you may just need it.

Sunos wrote:
Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.
I hear you can get $90,000 for a testicle. And with roleplaying being almost as expensive a habit as hard drugs, you may just need it.

Dang, $90,000? That's pretty tempting, ya know .... ;) Especially since the operation is a lot less invasive .... hmmm ....

Carnivorous_Bean wrote:
Sunos wrote:
Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.
I hear you can get $90,000 for a testicle. And with roleplaying being almost as expensive a habit as hard drugs, you may just need it.
Dang, $90,000? That's pretty tempting, ya know .... ;) Especially since the operation is a lot less invasive .... hmmm ....

And 50% of the population has two of those as well! And, weigh the odds. Those of us with a chance at reproduction only need one, while others who've tossed the option out the window for whatever reason (or have all the rugrats they want) don't need any!

But worth it as we all agree...lol

Every time I think Paizo is going to drive me insane with all the OUTSTANDING resources they have produced, they produce another one... dang...Well, just tallied up my cart for all of their back issue resources, and it looks like around $400... good thing I don't have to explain it to the wife, or she would have both my testicles AND the $180K to show for it.
The Exchange

Me likey!
Dark Archive
Zuxius wrote:
Me likey!

You likey me? ;P

Sunos wrote:
Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.
I hear you can get $90,000 for a testicle. And with roleplaying being almost as expensive a habit as hard drugs, you may just need it.

Why buy testicles?!

I mean, who'd WANT three?

GRU
Dark Archive
GRU wrote:
Sunos wrote:
Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.
I hear you can get $90,000 for a testicle. And with roleplaying being almost as expensive a habit as hard drugs, you may just need it.

Why buy testicles?!

I mean, who'd WANT three?

GRU

You're a fish... what do you know about human testicles?

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer
Asgetrion wrote:
GRU wrote:
Sunos wrote:
Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.
I hear you can get $90,000 for a testicle. And with roleplaying being almost as expensive a habit as hard drugs, you may just need it.

Why buy testicles?!

I mean, who'd WANT three?

GRU

You're a fish... what do you know about human testicles?

You've never heard of fish balls?

Coincidentally, Mr. Fishy's balls cast its shadow today and thus proclaimed six more weeks of winter. Brrr.
Dark Archive
Vic Wertz wrote:
Asgetrion wrote:
GRU wrote:
Sunos wrote:
Kevin Mack wrote:
Ah well time to sell a kidney.
I hear you can get $90,000 for a testicle. And with roleplaying being almost as expensive a habit as hard drugs, you may just need it.

Why buy testicles?!

I mean, who'd WANT three?

GRU

You're a fish... what do you know about human testicles?
You've never heard of fish balls?

Of course I have -- all Chelaxians are great culinarists! Now, fish balls are salty, but human testicles taste... a bit weird, like telephone-flavored ice cream! ;)

Dark Archive
Urizen wrote:
Coincidentally, Mr. Fishy's balls cast its shadow today and thus proclaimed six more weeks of winter. Brrr.

Are you sure it was Mr. Fishy?

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