selunatic2397's page

Once, my players asked a group of very small fey to transfer an enchantment from, a "boring and ugly" cloak of protection, to an elven gold torc with an amber clasp.

After a pizza runs worth of inspiration...no DM can resist PIZZA! I announced their price.

A riddle, a song, a dance, a story, and a snack that they had not had yet.

As I sat waiting expectantly, my players realized they were...on stage so to speak.

Hilarity ensued!

It's early Gygax...everything is more or less "Save Or Die".

Slurk...will it work? Nope!

Who says that keeping the shards with the Pathfinder Society is "SAFE" ?

I did the switch myself last session...the group went off to save the old cliche...virgin from dragon...

Rescued an hog tied male wood elf sorcerer...the looks of "what the hay??" made it all worthwhile.

The group's female mage was particularly effective in both her spells and roleplay...on a whim I had the captive related to nobility.

Yup, she rescued the handsome prince!

One of my gamers petrified his enemies...rock to mud...fireballed the mud...gathered up the now dust...mixed the dust with fine quality clay...

And then molded the clay into public toilets...neatly labeled [very incorrectly].

And I thought his back story of being an apprentice potter was harmless fluff.

Kryptonite bullets...just saying!

They all fear the mighty Gumbo!

An epic class Half Goblin BBQ Pit Master...with a pit big enough for a dragon...

"WAUGH!!!!!"

"They don't want my horde..they want to eat me!!!"

In an old game of shadowrun my players were left unattended with no one feeling resposible, and after somehow choosing to all be dwarves...called themselves...

The Lollypop Guild...picture 5 dwarves in studded black leather and chains swarming a lone security guard...beating the hell out of him...merrily singing...

"We represent the lollypop guild" song from Wizard Of Oz.

Sometimes I just sigh heavily at their antics and shake my head.

Lol just don't give it to your PC's; I've seen many a FR game ran into the ground by giving a game-breaking ability PC's should never have had. Then again we did play with some real bad players back then, so maybe I overreact to it. Anyone else have a fellow PC with spellfire ruin an otherwise cool game?

Way back when the first book came out I weakened and let a player have IT. It did not ruin the game...but, the rest of the party got frustrated by the endless hordes of nasty big bads hellbent to posess the spellfire...

The weilder ended the debate by moving to Kentucky...his dad got an incredibly good job there...the players last words were that no one else could have spellfire unless HE consented to it...

Fast forward to 3 years ago...one of my new players wanted spellfire so bad he could taste it...I told him of the long standing house rule on spellfire...He somehow found the first player's phone number...and while getting set to play called him up long distance no less!

The first players first response to the call was, "Who the heck are you?"

Then he cackled like a mad man and then yelled "NO!".

The house rule still stands and currently by unanimus vote no less.

The first player has since then changed his phone number.

Long ago my players for whatever godawful reason attempted to have a high level cleric cast a heal spell on their newest member who was at deaths door...

In first edition the heal spell heals you fully for all except 1d4 hit points...

The newest member was a first level mage with but 2 lone hit points...

I even suggested a cure light wounds spell as it would be cheaper and since the little mageling was only at 0 hitpoints...more practical.

Cue really drunk players...never game and drink by the way..."We want only the best for our little mage!!!"

MMMkay...I roll a d4...get a...4!

Look at the player..."You're now at NEGATIVE 2!

"Did that cleric just KILL ME?"..."With A Heal Spell?!?"

Everyone was lost in laughs and giggles for 5 minutes.

everything I type IS sarcasm...I was a Drill sgt (for a couple rotations), I can't get that out of my programming now. :)

The first thing my drill sergeant [Training Instructor..Air Force] told us was that I will remember his name until the day I die...

Tech Sergeant Balmer and Staff Sergeant Rodriguez...1983 Lackland AFB.

I've forgotten my own mother's birthday...but I will NEVER forget their names.

One of my old players used to blow through his low level mages spells in just a few rooms...third or fourth time he did it the rest of the players quietly refused to let him "rest"...at crossbow point and all in character they threatened to let the thief use him to set off hallway traps if he did it again.

Now, my players mage tends to cast both tactically and frugally...and hoard pearls of power!!!

First...I do not play in Golarion...I do use chunks of the setting and my players were aware of Iomedae and seemed to be pleased that she was an intelligent lawful good paladin god.

Second...none of my players worshipped Iomedae...Mystra and the elven gods mostly.

They reacted as if they were kidnapped...no ifs or buts about it.

They were on guard but responded politely to the "goddess", yes they used finger quotes.

They tried to explain they were not her worshippers and did not knoe her history........choir blast for 5d6...

Major note...one player with a Link obsession has a tiny azata butterfly faerie as an apprentice for his character...she did not do well with the choir blast...

All players stated "That was a direct attack! I knew this was a trap all along"...more or less collectively on several variations...

They moved to power up for a fight to the finish figuring it was the goat demon lord in person...

I have as the faeries queen...Great Queen Maeve...2 foot 6 and a demigoddess armed with the emerald studded scepter from the last installment weilded as a quarter staff [my player thought it would be an appropriately sized gift].

To head off a TPK, and because I have Aroden restored as a demigod, I had Iomedae as a demigod herself...I stated the faerie attempted a god call to save her friends...

Her masters player [the Link obsessed one] said..."MMMkay, thats a 00 on a D%...go for it" Our standard rule providing you don't do it more than once a real time year.

I rolled the needed 00 it front of them...a sense of calm was restored on the table.

I had Great Queen Maeve appear smacking her emerald quarter staff against her palm, tossing a small cube with a "Big Red Button" prominently on its top to the "Link", she said as they pressed the button and vanished to the abyss...

"LEAVE MY WORSHIPPER ALONE!!!" and the sound of smacks aplenty.

Why the big red button? Everyone knows heroes are not too bright...and absolutely no one can resist pushing a bright red button!

When the adventure was over they got to see a severely battered Iomedae [with emerald shaped bruises across her face].

They were pleased...adventure continued on track...peace was in the land...and a "LAWFUL GOOD" demigoddess was given a smack on the wrist...erm face...for kidnapping another gods worshipper...this more than anything else seemed to please my gamers..."Actions should have consequences even for, and especially for, the gods" [my gamers voice of reason and party leader].

I ran this adventure last week and they do not read these forums.

Hope this was what you were hopeing for Skeld!

selunatic2397 wrote:

I do intend to have Asmodeus steal their cartographer/sage to draw them into another series of adventures...you don't think Baphomet really "escaped" on his own do you? He was the big A's sleeper agent to be revealed at the proper moment to crush the Abyss and end the Blood War once and for all!!!

Or so my plotting to this point seems to be telling me at this time.

Why does everyone think this all of a sudden? No, he really did escape from Asmodeus, and there's no Blood War in Golarion. Not that him controlling Baphomet would even change anything in this AP.

Since I did not see you at my last session, I do have the Blood War in my game...I don't use Golarion as my setting, And yes he did not "escape from Asmodeus".

I run my game...you run yours...have fun in Golarion and I'll have fun in my setting.

Works for me.

I'm old school! I blame.....Global Warming!!!!!

That logical path of thought was well and truly AWESOME!

All I can say is just WOW!

Thanks for posting it so I can bother my players with it.

I've got the opposite with my players...they have hired a "cartographer/scribe/amateur sage to do the paperwork for them...

This kinda means that the burden of academics has been dropped back in my lap while they tend to concentrate on the hack and blast aspects.

The job of keeping their cartographer alive has ended up in them hiring that drow dervish girl they are hell bent on redeeming to be her bodyguard...

Little by little they seem to be acquiring a small horde of employees.

Ok who else read this as "do souls have sex". To which i say, i hope so.

I, too, am seeing "do souls have sex". You are not alone.

Off Topic..if there is a Hello Kitty...why is there not a Goodbye Puppy?

I tried to google the topic but the number one site was pet funeral sites...then my PC announced that IE needed to shut down...and it did...

Coincidence...or Hello Sabotage?

Radiance and the sword Irabeth sold were two different blades..,.or so I thought.

My players number one thing to do with dead dragons....

DRAGON JERKY!!!!

Now available in honey barbeque, hickory smoked, and new for this year...Solar Glory! So hot it make the ghost pepper look like a bell pepper!

I am extremely impressed by how UPS handled my shipment!

16th...451 pm processed at Paizo

...951 pm arrival...Redmond

...1043 pm departure

17th...152 am arrival...Moses Lake

...503 am...departure

...639 am...arrival...Kennewick

...753 am...out for delivery

...500 pm...at my front door!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It took USPS 5 days to more than a week to ship across WA state.

UPS did it in just over 24 hours...GO TEAM UPS!!!

How is he going to aim his spells?

I had a blinded mage try to use his familiar [black tom cat] to either let him see through his eyes...or meow loudly when his finger was on target...

By unanimous group votes...the meowing won!

My gamers like to think of their high level heroes as "God Slayers"...To their credit they have wacked a serious number of demon/devil/daemon lords,and helped to machine the death of Shar in my Forgotten Realms game [that took from 1995 to just past 2010, with their heroes really acting as mooks to the hero quasi-godlings they were serving]...

So when the heard of Razmir they thought instantly he was running a scam, so they wanted to take him out to reclaim their title...

To their disgust...they did kill him...but his church refuses to admit anything and claim "Razmir has ascended beyond our mundane reality...yada yada yada."

I did have the goddess of illusions came back from her "death", and reading this forum I'll have her start granting his clergy true spells as "PROOF" he is still in existance...she gets the prayers in his name.

Thanks for the help with my game guys!

I am approaching 50 this year...my players are in their 40's with a 20 something son of one of the players to round out our group...none of them have ever raised an eyebrow about any of the LGBT npc's brought up in this thread/modules past or present...

It just does not seem to be an issue to them/me...I was brought up believing that all were created equal...even in rpgs...especially in rpgs as they are a means of escape from our boring real day lives!

I work retail...yup selling socks and underwear funds my gaming addiction...and yup...its boring as all get out...gaming has been an escape for me since 1978 when I saw my first DM running a game at Penneys in the local mall.

In that time I have had more than a few LGBT gamers at my table...none of my players cared much beyond how well they roleplayed/gamed and contributed to the pizza fund/soda runs. They were all decent gamers...and they were treated as such by both myself and the other players.

The first coherant words out of my players when they saw the first chapter of the current adventure had nothing to do with the female orc paladin on the cover or her wife...it was "DID YOU SAY THERE ARE THREE DEMON LORDS TO TAKE OUT IN THIS ADVENTURE??????"...followed by excited words that I am not going to post.

In the real world or in a fantasy world, its still important to remember we are all equal, we all have a right to be there, and the dice will always treat us the same.

Sorry for the long post...

One of my players has a character named...DarkMoon...he still thinks an ancestor was cheated out of the vale!

Darkmoon Vale...The Dragon's Demand...both good for more than just a level or two...nice long term fun in both!

Still no tracking data...either it was given to USPS on the 13th or so like one person said...or it was billed as shipped on the 13th and only actually really really given to USPS only Crom knows when. Sarah said they print rolls of shipping labels and bill at that time BUT really ship when it gets out the door...HMMMMMMM.

Have I been unfairly blaming the USPS for emulating snails?

The actual shipping date on my packages postage stamp is never the date I have been told it shipped, it is the date USPS actually got it.

Please do not keep mentioning GENCON...each and every month lately has had yet another delay pop up as if by magic.

Early this year they said they had hired some person to make them ship better/faster...

I will give UPS a shot at faster delivery...but my patience is running out...

It really sucks to see my subscription get here close to a week after my FLGS gets their shipment...like someone up this thread said...subscribers seem to be last class customers now.

I have to agree with the Epic rules being wonky.

I just flipped through some old Dragon magazines and had a look at an epic level statblock.

It was in the Ecology of the Titan article (I forget which issue), just pure insanity with that one. They had statted up Cronus, the titan from Greek mythology. If I remember correctly, he was CR 56, 1500+ hp, AC 60+, DR 23/-, 4 attack with an almost 100 attack bonus on each attack and he had a +15 colossal glaive and a +20 breastplate.

That's kind of the thing with epic, a lot of the time higher level just meant bigger numbers. Mythic gives a much better feel of epicness than the epic rules ever did.

Yup mythic does high level better than TSR/WOTC ever did...they did indeed just add more numbers...1 pit fiend??? NO! 25 pit fiends cuz yer so l33t now...my players really prefer mythic to my old TSR high level stuff...GO PAIZO!!!

Neat! You have given me some ideas to pester my players with...thanks!

Volume 5 of the Pathfinder Chronicles!

A never ending roll of fluffy white toilet paper!

I had a battle royale over that little gem! 2 dead and 3 injured with the groups ranger winning by the skin of his...you can guess!

Whenever I see "ninja" I have an almost primal desire to run a pirate

My players opened up with flying and fireballs, adding prot. from missiles as a defense.

Enter the magic maxims...fireballs now depleted, but not all maxims eliminated. Melee with the tanks front and center and alchemists fire used to light them up...mmmkay!

They did win by the skin of their teeth and hit points in the single digits...they were popping healing potions like crack junkies!

Summoned elementals helped out considerably against the pale snipers, +1 rifles can't hurt 1st ed. elementals...but the +2 maxims they missed tore them to bits!!!

It was a great ride and one for the history books...thanks again Brandon! That was one heck of a module!!!!!

Of all the gamers I have DM'd for over the years who played CN, about 75% of them just chose CN because they wanted to be evil but be able to claim they were just doing what their character would do...just being a jerk...or shut down the game until they felt like letting the rest of the gamers have fun again.

Yes 25% of the CN were playing the random/erratic card to the hilt...one player flipped a coin to determine his actions...but the other 75% caused our group to ban CN alignments along with the evil ones to let us have fun again...

Still having fun for close to 10 years after we made that choice...your games may be different...

My players always have multiple copies of their spell books whenever they can afford it.

It drains off excess cash, and the occasional theft or destruction of a copy just makes them paranoid [and spend more cash on even more copies].

To be fair, I have only stolen a players spellbooks twice years back when they were at odds with another mage and a critical failure on a save versus dragon breath burned another few books to ashes...

But...man do my players have long memories!

Even my players high level heroes avoid this place like the mists of ravenloft used to be...

Hmmm...now I have a new toy to replace ravenloft in their nightmares!

BWAA HAA HAA!

How about a expert barbeque pit master...half goblin (won't admit what the other half is..."but me mum was a goblin princess!").

Has a obsession about barbequed dragon! Always talking about it, what it would taste like, does green dragon bbq give you gas?, does red dragon bbq really need any hot sauce at all?

Guards his secret recipe book...a coloring book with badly drawn pictures that could be almost anything...he can't read so he does his best.

Obsessed with other cooks secret recipes.

The online comic The Order of the Stick" has the spell "Evard's Spiked Tentacles Of Forceful Intrusion"

It has become my players all time favorite spell...Heavy Sigh!

3 point # ? , I play 1.0 thank you very much! Since 1978!

They already have a barbeque pit big enough for a butchered out dragon!

Dragon BBQ and jerky seem to be their trademarks...any giant crayfish or crabs are also hungrily gobbled up!

Sometimes I wonder if my players are a secret cult of foodies led by the galloping gourmet.

That or Martha Stewart followers...any expensive furniture or odd items seem to be of more interest than the random magic stuff they capture.

Oh well...it's always interesting and we always have fun!

Our Sorcerer dropped the stag with a crossbow critical in one shot the minute it appeared....

"you see a huge white stag approaching..."

"what's that?"

"it's an elk"

"what's an elk?" (we live in alaska...no elk)

"It's like a caribou"

"OH! I shoot it!" (typical alaskan....lol)

My players had the stag's backstraps harvested before they dealt with the fey!

Gotta have yer priorities straight!

I once threw a corridor trap into a dwarf hold that basically closes in on all 4 sides crushing the target and then twisting in opposite directions like you were wringing out a wet dish rag...

In a fit of generosity, I let the party see a twisted rusting chunk of metal in the trapped corridor...(I really ought to seek out medical help for that pesky generosity streak)

Yup, you guessed it...the thief rushed into the trap without checking for traps...

"Dibs on any good stuff!" he cried...then cried real tears as the trap was triggered.

They used a grappling hook and rope to drag his remains out of the trap...and set off the trap 2 more times...

"He's already dead! What does a few more points of damage matter anyway?" Otgar The Goblin Slapper, Party Frontline Tank

My players have a long standing tradition of dragon barbeque and dragon jerky...

"Get your dragon jerky in tradional hickory smoked or honey barbeque...and now for a limited time...Solar Glory! When hotter than the 9th level of hell is for the wimps...ask for solar glory dragon jerky by name!" Gumbo, half goblin barbeque pit master level 15.

I'll say it because no one else seems to want to...

Compensation! They are compensating for some thing!

HEE! HEE! HEE!

My prediction was fulfilled! My gamers went totally Godzilla on this module after...

There is no way on Pelor's green Oerth that I will let my players get Murlynd's magic magnum revolvers!

My players found out about the baba yaga aspect and reminded me their high level heroes killed her off in an epic three day battle (the old "hut of baba yaga" module by tsr) a long time ago.

I just laughed maniacally and stated death is not a career ending event when you are an epic level mage like a folklore classic from russia, much less an 18th level mage...

They now believe Iggwilv wished her back to life...and are blaming every mishap or bad luck on a vegeful baba yaga.

I have a paranoid pack of gamers whose high level character's children are now the current local heroes they will run through this adventure arc.

Despite pleading I will not let them bring the high levels out of retirement...Boy! this adventure is just tailor made for freaking out my players...

Thanks Paizo!

I convert the adventure paths back to 1st edition each month...I drop what will not work and since I don't have the beastiaries, I either ask my players what this critter best resembles or drop in something challenging.

I have not had complaints from my players so I must be doing something right! Plus, we have fun!