hellacious huni's page

Dear Paizo,

Please cancel my Pathfinder and Gamemastery module subscriptions. I'm in love with your company and all of your work but I just lost my job so I should probably concentrate on rent and feeding the kobolds first before rpg stufferoos.

Thank you so much, and I promise I'll be back as soon as I get a job again, count on it.

Love,

Jeremy

Sebastian,

You might be our D&D Messiah, preaching a message of love and acceptance. The prophecies did say that our figurehead would be a "Conanesque Ball Buster" who would "Razz the Eff out of bunches of Grogs," so it could be you.

Thank you for saying what you said Sea Bass. Thank you for showing the community that other gamers are all we've got. D&D is supposed to be about friends getting together, not enemies angrily shoving their metaphorical fists into metaphorical...places.

All Hail Sebastian, All Hail The D&D Messiah!

Behold a pale horse and PAIZO followed with him.

There are printing presses, but they are relatively rare. The fixed-plate kind are more common than the Gutenberg-esque movable type kind.

Maybe we should have a Police Academy Adventure Path? Come on gang!

*goes into food coma and dreams of pink girl geckos*

*eats every single attacking goblin*

Dude, Hot Fuzz was incredible!!!!

2 scenes: "Have you ever shot your gun in the air and gone agh?"

And: "PUNCH. THAT. SH*T. *car goes speeding away through town and there are the Nice Place To Live inspectors standing there with their clipboards."

HA HA HAH HA

I'd also add the "fiendish" template.

Here's some tips I wrote for my department at work. I did all of them last night...

HERE’S FIVE NEAT WAYS TO CELEBRATE UN-VALENTINE’S DAY:

1. TRY ON AND RETRY ON ALL OF THE CLOTHES YOU OWN, TO SEE IF YOU’VE GAINED WEIGHT!
2. PLAY A RIP-ROARING GAME OF DUNGEONS & DRAGONS! ALONE.
3. GIVE YOURSELF SAFETY TRAINING DRILLS, FOR WHEN HITMEN INEVITABLY SIEGE YOUR CRAMPED APARTMENT (IT’S GONNA HAPPEN SOMETIME, IT’S BEST TO BE PREPARED).
4. MAKE A LIST OF ALL THE PEOPLE THAT HAVE DONE YOU WRONG AND THAT YOU REFUSE TO FORGIVE.
5. FIND FUN WAYS TO STIFLE THE CRYING FITS, LIKE WRAPPING A TOWEL AROUND YOUR FACE AND PRETENDING YOU’RE A MUMMY!

And by the way, I know it must have been tough to push through Erik's constant language barrier advice, but you did it. YOU DID IT. And you're a pretty phenominal writer in your second language. You know who else was like that?

Nabokov.

Vladmir.

Yeah.

*claps hands, slowly, in hopes of starting clap fire*

WHOA!!!!!! WHOA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel like you just told me to "open up" and then uncapped a fire hydrant!

Dude, you're awesome Boomer, but I think overkill may have cost you. Unless you were going for the newfangled 324 page Gamemastery Module (let's call it B1 for Boomer Adventure). Retails at $59.99.

I hope that you get to do work for Paizo in the future Broseph, and if you win this, I can't wait to see and play and run your module - unfortunately, IMO, as it stands now, Christine's is the only module that could be a 32 pager and is still crazy imaginative.

Much Love,

Hellacious

PS. Thanks for the PSA's, someday they're going to look back at those and use them to blackmail you when you're rich and famous in the Holocube trade (because it's the future, right?).

I read this one last because I was sure it would be the best...I was not dissapointed. I immediately went and voted for "Clash of the Kingslayers."

As Tim and Eric would say, Christine: GREAT JOB!

Sorry guys, I was really busy at work the last couple days and couldn't even think about getting in the mindset for the PbP. I'm back now. Again, sorry for the delay. :[ I hope I'm forgiven?

A 'World of Greyhawk Boxed Set' that includes a giant poster map; a player's guide to Greyhawk with all the original greyhawk dieties, and with each country given a one page map; a Greyhawk City book with pull-out map; a DM guide that includes NPCs with both 3.5 and 4th edition stats, adventure hooks, and maps that locate all Greyhawk modules of any edition. Oh, yeah, and every boxed set comes with one randomly assigned miniatures of one of the Circle of Eight. ... What, that's one product. A boxed set is one product, right?

Unfortunately, I am blue, but I still hate smur smurs!

Heathansson wrote:

7.5 will be out in 3 years.
I don't think I'll be able to retire by then.

Same here. I'm 35 right now, and can (theoretically) retire at age 59. That's 34 years, by which time I fully expect that if WotC still owns D&D they will be on something like 14.5E. That gives them a new edition roughly every 5 years.

I personally think that fantastical names are utter sh*te when it comes to actually trying to roleplay them (to me a weakness in the fantasy genre in general).

I'd much rather have one of my PCs play "Roger" or "Gary" than "Zenobintraitix G'hain'Mira."

Nothing annoys me more as a DM when a PC can't pronounce his own **cking name! One PC would constantly have to rifle through his papers to find his characters name and then phoenetically say it out. Sad thing is, the character was supposed to be an Elf Scholar.

Eventually, all these stupid, long winded names just become shortnened, "normal" names anyway.

Keriaiani became "Little K"

Kussein became "Big K"

Shalonuid became Sherry

Maledidume became Mal

Aleisse became Alex

Just name your PCs something normal please and spare us the retarded fantasy sh*t.

Look, I don't want a swashbuckler, I want a rogue. If I want a swashbuckler, I'll get Complete Warrior. And see how quickly I am not buying it.

No, gaming in Seattle.

Oh my God, Detritus, that's a bad DM. That's a really bad DM.

You need to either start DMing or have someone else do it, because you're not playing Dungeons and Dragons, you're playing Death and Donuts (tm)!

I would just be honset with your DM and tell him you're not having fun dying all the time and not being able to defeat the creatures you're supposed to defeat. If he throws a fit then it is now your decision whether you want to keep playing with him.

I live in Seattle, WA. Metaphysically I live in your heart.

Some of the problems I have had with the rogue doesn't have anything to do with the game, but with the DM. He doesn't allow creativity in his campaign, if you think of something that will make the encounter go easier or by-pass a problem. He immediately makes it impossible or just simply says it doesn't work. So I judge the usefulness of the class based on what the rules says has to happen.

It is the same reason I cannot play an enchanter or illusionist in our campaigns. Unfortunately he is the only person willing to DM and I do not have the time to put in to do it myself.

hellacious huni wrote:

Alright, Kobold, I'll change it just for you!!! You little stinkpot...

Aww, your profile is so cute!
(Hey, I'm called 'Kobold Cleaver', did you expect me to burst into tears at a bit of kobold hatred?)

There you go, K Cleaver, a special, served just for you.

Alright, Kobold, I'll change it just for you!!! You little stinkpot...

hellacious huni, I don't like your fixes - but that stems from the fact that I don't feel Rogues are weaker. Your fixes would take them over the top for me. On top of that, even though I am not a stringent supporter of Wealth per Level, your Indiana Jones fix blows that right out of the water.
If they work for you, then that is what matters.

In regards to the "Indiana Jones fix" it does mess with the Wealth level of a character - but that's the benefit of the variant class: a stretched wealth level. Green Ronin does the same thing with the Noble Class and I liked that idea. I of course, take away trap finding and some other stuff to balance it.

IMO, the 'problem' with Rogues is that their role in a game isn't 100% compatible with battlefield-equality.

4E is, from the sounds of it, not going to have any room for namby-pamby's who aren't optimized for battlefield effectiveness, and so the traditional Rogue from fantasy, whether that be Bilbo the (fairly hapless) Burgler or the Grey Mouser or Shadospawn of Sanctuary or Conan the (sometimes Barbarian, usually Thief of other peoples stuff), isn't an archetype that really fits onto a game based around a battlemat and a combat encounter as the end-all-be-all of the D&D experience.

hellacious huni wrote:

Well, IMO, the problem with sneak attack, is if that's the best the rogue can bring to a party with a wizard or a fighter...the rogue's f*cked.

Wizards have contigencies. Lots and lots of contigencies. The Spell Compendium basically let's wizards say, "Hi, I'm a wizard, do you mind if I kill you?"

Are you assuming the rogue kills the Wizard in one sneak attack? While he's sleeping? I'm saying in any match up - not just toe to toe - the rogue can't stand up (even outside of combat due to the Wizard's, or frankly any character's, magical help). The rogue just doesn't have the same power level in or out of combat at high levels.

Personally, I don't want to feel inferior to all the other players when I'm level 20, I want to add something fun to the game, not just be the guy tagging along because, "Well, he's been with us this whole time anyway, might as well let him come along."

Your arguments are good, and would be more convincing if you'd change your profile.

I was talking to my friends about this:

Rogue v Fighter.

So, the Fighter can kick the rogue's ass in combat, right? The rules support that. Cool. I get it.

But the rogue...the Rogue can set up an elaborate plot to kill the Fighter (i.e. in his sleep, with poison, using cohorts) because the Rogue isn't stupid, he isn't going to go +3 dagger to +5 Frost Blast Vorpal Longsword of Infinite Destruction (I own it).

The rules, however, do not support this. Sure, it can be done, but it is heavily dependent upon the creativity of the player no the Rogue Class. All the Figher needs to do is look in the rulebook and say, "Uh...I'm John Rambo." The Rogue looks in the book and says, "Well, I've got high Diplomacy."

The PHB doesn't teach a player how to be creative, it just gives stats. So what happens when Rogue is fighting a Fighter who is ascreative as her as a Player? Well, you have a CAREFUL Fighter, who will set up his own contigencies, who will not get caught unawares (because not going into a shady alley is not a choice covered in the rules).

Seriously, the Rogue requires that you work with your DM to make him good, whereas nearly any other class (except the Bard of course...sorry Bard) can stand up to any situation depending on PHB stats and Player creativity.

That may be a positive to some, to me it is an inherent weakness to the class.

Well, IMO, the problem with sneak attack, is if that's the best the rogue can bring to a party with a wizard or a fighter...the rogue's f*cked.

Wizards have contigencies. Lots and lots of contigencies. The Spell Compendium basically let's wizards say, "Hi, I'm a wizard, do you mind if I kill you?"

Are you assuming the rogue kills the Wizard in one sneak attack? While he's sleeping? I'm saying in any match up - not just toe to toe - the rogue can't stand up (even outside of combat due to the Wizard's, or frankly any character's, magical help). The rogue just doesn't have the same power level in or out of combat at high levels.

Personally, I don't want to feel inferior to all the other players when I'm level 20, I want to add something fun to the game, not just be the guy tagging along because, "Well, he's been with us this whole time anyway, might as well let him come along."

(Please keep in mind that these are my opinions)

I first put forth in the aforemention thread that Rogue's have some problems.

First of all, it's not a Rogue's fault that traps in 3e aren't fun. Flat out, I don't like the trap system in 3e. When I DM traps are puzzles or obstacles NOT ENCOUNTERS. They do not have an EL and they always make sense. No more "pressure plates" in the middle of effing nowhere just because.

Example: I am GMing the Dungeon Mag adventure titled "Worms in the Exchequery" where, written into the adventure, for some reason a group of thieves were able to rig a "pressure plate" trap in a bank lobby. WHAT!? Isn't a pressure plate a little complicated to just be able to put it in the middle of a bank lobby that you've only spent a couple hours in? That is a glaring example of the trap problem in D&D.

To summarize - Rogue's specialize in trap finding and disarming - which isn't fun (for me) in 3.5. Yet I love Rogue personality and the idea sneaky attacking scoundrels.

And here's another problem: At higher levels a Rogue pales in comparison to other classes. No melee, no magic, and his trap finding and disarming become silly next to the magical means of sidestepping 3.5 traps. Pit a level 20 rogue versus a level 20 wizard and you have Rogue Soup a la mode! Time Stop, Summon, summon, summon, summon, and mob the Rogue. Dead.

Maybe this is more a topic of equality between classes but, different thread... :/

Here have been my homebrewed fixes for Rogue's as a DM:

The Indiana Jones fix - at certain levels I allow Rogues the ability to pick from a list of Artifacts I created (minor or major depending upon level). This is the assumption that as the penultimate adventurer they have access to artifacts that other players would simply not have the balls or connections to get.

The Luck Fix - I take away trap finding and just make the Rogue an exceedingly lucky fighter. With luck skills and fate testing they become the "hero" class.

The Trap fix - Rogue's no longer are just about "good search checks" but gain fundemental knowledge and streetsmarts when it comes to traps. In game, this transelates to hints from the DM based on rolls that can either answer the conundrum of a trap or give a hint to it's purpose.

What do you think?

(Sorry for the long post!)

Hi Guys,

Is it okay if I use my G Ronin discount (from the sale) on back issues of Dungeon?

Thanks for the clarification!

Love,

Hellacious (Jeremy)

Here are ideas I've had but can't think of how to make them work:

Sharn is empty 28 Days Later made me think of this. I think it would be really creepy if one day the PCs woke up and all of Sharn was empty. The Skycoaches and elevators abandoned so they would have go everywhere on foot. Might not even use Zombies, I just like the imagery of the empty city. But how can I do it without destroying Sharn?

Sky Pirates! on the ECS's recomendation I started watching the Pirates of the Carribean movies and I really think swashbuckling piracy on airships would be fun but not sure how to get around A: Lyrandar controls all airships, and B: Let the PCs be Robin Hood like pirates who fight for the "good" even if it isn't the "law"

Fastest guns in the west The Assasination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford, and BBC's Robin Hood have got me thinking about the "good outlaw" idea. This would be the easiest...

SKY PIRATES: I don't know enough about Eberron but why can't ships be stolen from Lyrander? Why can't an organization have made their own with some evil elementals bound to it. The first adventure could be having the PCs reclaim the ships from the bad guys and then the ship is theirs...but uh oh, Lyrander doesn't like competition and now are after the PCs!

Cool ideas by the way, I hope the PCs like em, cause I do. Good luck.

I'll want to give the rogue a go right away. I want to see if 4e has fixed some of the rogue problems persistent in 3e. And I love playing rogues. :)

I really am sorry if I insulted you Razz, or took your statement out of context, I was just tryin to have fun and make light of all this 4E hullabaloo.

I'm sorry that you feel that way about 4e. I really am starting to like the sound of it and the more I play D&D 3.5 - especially at high levels I'm starting to feel that it needed a pretty hefty fix.

I'm just the type of person that doesn't really care what they do to the fluff, I never really liked it much in the first place. I've always felt forced to use the dieties provided so I rebelled against that as a DM.

I felt forced to use Elves the way D&D described them when it didn't make sense to me why a race that is spread across a thousand planes and in a thousand different places still is good with longswords. I thought that was pretty dumb.

But these are my opinions and I'm sorry if a lot of the things you held dear are being taken away. I will say this, it's the nature of the beast. All ongoing products change with the times. Movie sequels, comic book characters - they all change if you let them continue, they HAVE to.

But, again, Razz, I feel your passion and I say continue playing 3.5 as long and far as you want.

Heck, play 4e and just keep all the fluff from 3. That's a possibility. I do that kind of thing all the time.

For Razz, reality may be a transitive thing...

Watch out, here comes some razzing (no pun intended):

No, you're absolutey right Razz, you should be their one and only playtester. Just you, in a room, with a minature.

I'm sure they would get some positive reviews out of you.

...
...I hate this place.

Let's consume it, entirely...

I want to take a moment to also thank all the contestants for their hard work.

I have been able to use vast amounts of stuff from this contest and the stuff I couldn't use inspired me to make better stuff!

I love Akram Zafir and have plugged it right into my campaign. Likewise the country with the dying godhead.

I love the shroud, I love the nausea pill (genius!), and I really like the murderous nanny.

I was very vocal about my sadness in seeing Sam Kisko go, I thought he had the most well-written country and of course Migrus stole all our hearts.

The elemental quiver rocked ass and I'm already placing them all over Varisia like candy bowls at gramma's house.

Seriously, good job everyone, even the worst of the superstars still were fun, creative, and playable.

I really like that 4E is going the "play like you got a pair" rout. Personally, I don't like playing heroes as if they were mice. Really in 3x, even fighters you have to friggin tip toe around every where, if you don't you're meat.

If I want that experience I'll play Call of Cthulu. I like that I can now jump into melee kick ass and take names. Yeah, you gotta be careful when something SCARY comes along (i.e. Dragons) but any other time you can beat heads and high five each other.

Keep in mind, this just sounds a lot more fun to me than creeping around trying to not get killed by everything. I guess, it's the distinction between playing to not die and playing to win.

I live in Seattle, I'd be very interested~

Dude, what great idea to make Cantrips and Orisons free. I'm using this immediately!

Freehold DM:

Dude, I think you'd love my Realms. It's a real horror show. I had my players start in a concentration camp and have to break out. They hijacked a Thayan sand ship and crashed it into an underdark fissure. Now the new Sun Drow are chasing them through the collapsed waste lands and they're being dogged at every turn by elves from the surface.

hellacious huni wrote:

I actually really like the changes. Keep in mind, I didn't grow up playing D&D and Faerun wasn't really my bread and butter. It doesn't really effect me either way if they blew up have the world. But I have run a lot of Realms games and played in them as well and I think the changes sound cool.

I understand how this could be a blow to someone who loves the Realms and doesn't want to see it change. I'm a huge fan of Star Wars and what Lucas did in Episode 1-3 really cheesed me off, so yeah, I get how these changes could really get under your bonnet.

Just out of curiosity, what do you like about the changes? Is it the way the world is described? Was there something in the original setting that kept you away that is gone now? Or is it that you are interested in 4th edition and this is the first setting to more or less integrate the new 4th edition ideas into a setting?

I honestly am interested to hear about this. Thanks in advance for indulging me, if you choose to . . ;)

I think it is cool how Toril is being transposed by Abeir in certain places, that is something I myself would do in my home campaign.

I guess the thing is, the old Realms were cool but I didn't hold any specific reverence for them, I did things you wouldn't believe to Faerun because I didn't just feel railroaded with the adventures but also the setting itself. My players weren't the type to pour through the setting book but rather relied on me to paint the world for them, so I did things that are actually very similar to what 4E did. I killed Dieties, made them like dead machines that still produce Divine magic, collapsed huge portions of the continent into the Underdark so that the interactions would be real. I staged massive invasions from the Red Wizards on sand ships and air ships. There was genocide waged against the dwarfs, the elves became even further isolationists and everything in a word, was f*cked.

But I like a setting like that, where the struggles are big and the threats are very very real. That is why I'm such a big Dark SUn fan, even though I never got to run a campaign there, only got to be a player.

I actually really like the changes. Keep in mind, I didn't grow up playing D&D and Faerun wasn't really my bread and butter. It doesn't really effect me either way if they blew up have the world. But I have run a lot of Realms games and played in them as well and I think the changes sound cool.

I understand how this could be a blow to someone who loves the Realms and doesn't want to see it change. I'm a huge fan of Star Wars and what Lucas did in Episode 1-3 really cheesed me off, so yeah, I get how these changes could really get under your bonnet.

hellacious huni wrote:

The Pervert Portal: creates a portal about 2.5 inches in diameter that leads to a random plane (can be constructed so that the portal leads to the inside of living creatures).

Psshaaa! Dwarves be needin' a fair bit bigger o' a diameter fer dis here portal if'n ye be usin' it how I be thinkin' ye be usin' it.

The Space Ring: transports you thousands of miles off the world and into space. Be sure to wear a coat.

Potion of Rapture: flings you into the sky at a speed pf 100 miles per hour. Peters out about 2 miles up. (If a ceiling is above you take 10d6 bludgeoning damage).

The Pervert Portal: creates a portal about 2.5 inches in diameter that leads to a random plane (can be constructed so that the portal leads to the inside of living creatures).

Your play style sucks, Sebastian. Get on board the hellacious style or go home.

The Hellacious Style:

All dancing all the time. Dance party D&D! GET DOWN!

Took a big man to come out of the closet like that...

Alright, Nick, you don't have to friggin dip my head into it water torture style. I'll play it, I'll buy it, I'LL LOVE IIIIIIIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

man, o, man, I'm going to use ALL of these... *rubs hands together*

Good work staying...good, PCs!