baron arem heshvaun's page

Post Script

Dead Bref reflexively chewing down on the sword that killed him was one of my favorite (yet tragic) scenes.

However one recent scene that had my jaw drop as I read it was the 1 rolled by the forgery Jax made in haste as the cutter pulled along side of the players ship, followed a hair's width away with a natural 1 by the captain doing the inspecting.

I could actually hear the players cheer!

Jax, this dice roller is out to get you.

"Paizo Acquires Disney" I have always wanted to own a Magic Kingdom.

Besides, they now own Star Wars. Owning Disney would be even better than owning a life-sized Millennium Falcon. :)

Epilogue

-

And thus, it is written, with the monumental funding that was needed, the near endless child laborer gathered, with his vision and will channeled to the great task, Grand Moff Vic Wertz begun his life long dream of constructing a life-sized and fully operational Death Star III, bringing a New Order to the world, and the rest of the Over Sector.

For shorthand, I've taken to calling the two disparate points of view X vs. O. So, which are you -- an X or an O?

Gary McBride

I am a U.

I am a Unifier.

I will Unify all the free people and nations.

With the benevolence of superior firepower.

How does that line go again?

All shall love me, with Crushing Despair.

By twist of fate, divine grace, warp in the fabric of reality or the will of The Mona, you are present and next to Aroden with full knowledge that his death is imminent in the next seven minutes.

What do you say to him?

Only way to top that is to throw in some cough drops, too :P

Since we are trading folk remedies and old adepts wives home staples - a table spoon of organic honey before and then once during a slot works a bit better than the old cough drop. More nutritious too. And kissable!

With the Reign of Winter AP beginning and many of the Paizo faithful eagerly awaiting how Mother Russia will be portrayed in the pages of the AP - an ancient threat may have callously revealed itself.

Seeing that the umbral veil between worlds has been penetrated and obfuscation and utmost secrecy are no longer the by words of the day, it appears the Aboleths have seen it fit to test fire* their weapon that will ultimately bring an Age of Darkness into our own world.

* (To give some perspective on this 'test fire' - the Meteorite that burned through the skies above Siberia late last week is estimated to be some 17.5 meters across, had an estimated mass of 8,000 to 10,000 Tons, and released the energy equivalent to nearly 500 Kilotons of TNT which is the rough equivalent of 25 of the atomic bombs detonated above Hiroshima that turned that ancient city into cinders.)

Thus, armed with this knowledge, I once again implore Vic Wertz to continue diverting funds into the Death Star project, our only hope against the threat of the Aboleths.

Help us Vic Wertz, you are our only hope.

Female villains -

While I am eagerly anticipating Diana Rigg's portrayal of Olenna Redwyne, 'The Queen of Thorns', the singularly most brilliant portrayal of a powerful villainess I have ever seen was by Siân Phillips as Livia Drusilla, in the BBC's 'I, Claudius' - in that role, Siân Phillips could school the likes of Doctor Doom and Ra's al Ghul on the tenets of Lawful Evil power.

Since when is Iggwilv related to Baba Yaga? Don't recall that in Canon anywhere.

As for the City Beyond the gate, you know that Dragon did an article on the insides of Baba Yaga's Hut, right?

==Aelryinth

I believe that in Greyhawk lore its now considered that Baba Yaga is not Iggwilv, but rather that the Witch Queen of Perrenland is Grandma Gnarlybones daughter, some say 'adoptive daughter' but the more adherent Greyhawk lore keepers are pushing the idea they are of the blood.

And yes I HAVE Roger E Moore's and other articles about the Dancing Hut. They are next to Ed Greenwood's issues on 'The Politics of Hell.'

BONUS XP to players who cast Tasha's Hideous Laughter at Rasputin and make it stick!

Because kids, (Na)Tasha IS Iggwilv.

WAIT!!!

OMG!

If Rasputin is related to Baba Yaga then makes him related to Iggwilv and Iuz! And an in law (in chaos?) of Graz'zt.

OMG! Paizo, Brandon, you guys ROCK! Wow!

May your children grow up to be supermodel rocket scientists, your puppies grow up to be wolfhounds and your kittens grow up to become despots of small warm tropical islands!

Bravo!

It's literally 8:50 AM in New York and I am opening a bottle of wine and grilling a steak to celebrate.

На здоровье

Jessica Price wrote:

The princess is the dragon.

I want to play this.

-

Mikaze just because I hold you very dear -

Your wish is granted.

Mathew I did really love you in those old Mickey Mouse club shows!

For my money, you were as talented as Britney.

Aroden: angered That's it! I quit! Bake them yourself if you think you can do better!

--

Epilogue:

Some time later

baby Razimir: Hi guys! I brought Sun Orchid milk, may I have some cookies?!

EVERYONE: in unison GET OUT OF HERE!

baby Razimir: running away clutching his Whispering Tyrant doll Waaaaah!

Worth quick the watch, fun ending.

We're nearing completion on a major refactoring of the messageboards code. Mostly it's to add support under the hood for Paizo Game Space, but there will be a few usability and appearance tweaks, and I'm hoping it'll perform better than the old code.

I'm sure this is all well and good and if I was 20 years younger it may very well made a lick of sense.

As it stands, all you kids get off my lawn!

Huzzah Kajehase!

The AP itself?

"Wrath of the Righteous."

Will the Fifth Crusade be called "The Righteous Crusade" or "War of the Righteous" then?

As an aside, WotR, is also the acronym for Middle Earth's "War of the Ring."

We know what happened the The Balrog in that one.

A year late but your bonded Core Rule Book was found by newly minted five star GM and our fellow Grognard Chris Mortika.

It is in near pristine condition, save for your handy work of course.

Chris gave it to me and I held stewardship of it for three days (not unlike Sam Gamgee and The One Ring) as I tried to ascertain the best way to get it back to you. I even went to a few Gencon booths that had Las Vegas as their home points of origin.

In the end our Capitan de Guardia, Mike Brock said he would like to present it to you and he has your mighty tome or entrusted it to others who may be heading your way.

Please do tell Chris the you appreciate his sleuthing and bad a$$ perception skills.

Best,

Noel Anthony,
Aka Baron Arem Heshvaun

Princess Leia: No! Golarion is (nearly, from time to time, a) peaceful planet! We have no weapons, (save a few black powder vorpal staff of the magi) ...

Para Grand Moff Tarkin: You would prefer another target, a Grognard target? Then name the system! I grow tired of asking, so this will be the last time: *Where* is the 3.5 edition holdouts base?

Princess Leia: ... Aroden's hairline. They're on Aroden's hairline.

Para Grand Moff Tarkin: There. You see, Para Lord Vader, she can be reasonable. Continue with the operation; launch a squadron of The Four Horsemen, begin landing the Drow Stormtroopers in the Underdark, and have the Imperial Aboleth wake the Runelords and the Tarrasque. Oh, use the final issue of Dragon Magazine to line the bottom of the harpy cage.

Princess Leia: WHAT?

Para Grand Moff Tarkin: You're far too trusting. Aroden is too remote a deity to make an effective demonstration - but don't worry; we will deal with your 3.5 hold outs soon enough.

James Jacobs wrote:

The penultimate adventure's title is: "Rasputin Must Die!"

IF it is the real Rasputin in the path, it strains credulity.

IF it is not the real Rasputin, why use the name?

May I beg you to reconsider?

ABSOLUTELY please do NO such thing!

The pedigree, tradition and seniority of Rasputin in roleplaying games surpasses that of newbies like the Tarasque, Pazzu, and Death Knights.

Rasputin was after all named by Gary Gygax as the very example of having the gift of an 18 Constitution in the 1st Edition DMG.

Now everyone play nice or Old Uncle Grognard will tell you who has an 18 Charisma.

top 10 animated movies of all time

I was rather hoping Flight of Dragons would crack your top 10.

Random conspiracy;

A long time ago, a loose alliance of gods imprisoned Rovagug. Both Abadar and Asmodeus had something to do with fashioning the prison, and both Abadar and Asmodeus have vault / key / lock associations. The stories are sometimes unclear, because Abadar, after pushing Asmodeus into the prison after Rovagug and secretly taking over as Prince of Hell, didn't always get his stories straight. To be fair, he was under a bit of pressure at the time. (If Asmodeus, a god of lies and trickery, had pushed Abadar in instead, and usurped his deific position, you can be darn sure the cover stories would be impeccable.)

What no one save Abadar knows:

Asmodeus neither created nor was pushed into the prison, Asmodeus IS the prison that keeps Rovagug held firm. Abadar fashioned the godcage with the most unique material in all the planes that he knew could never be broken or would ever yield: Asmodeus' pride.

Sean K is almost as dreamy as the Inquisitor in 'Dorkness Rising' ... now that guy was tasty!

There is an epidemic running rampant throughout the Pathfinder community.

This virulent strain of magical disease is not lycanthropy

I would definitely not go as far as making that conclusion ... In fact every year at this little get together at Gencon ... Wait ... What's that sound ? On no ... THEY ARE HERE !

I ... I have said too much!

Mercy!! ... That's my leg!!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh !

I'm happy my small thread giving overdue accolades to Liz got to reach a 2nd page.

: )

I've noticed quite a lot of harsh and disrespectful language directed toward the Paizo staff as of late,

I don't think remarks by the Paizo staff directed at Cosmo counts in this case ...

; )

There is also the Tian Xia curse based on this real world saying that goes like this:

"May Pathfinders take keen interest in your belongings."

I had a young man ask me if he could GM the Pathfinder Society modules, etc. He will be 18 in 6 months & has been gaming (3.5, 4th ed, Pathfinder, & the systems that use the percentage die + d10's)for 4 to 5 yrs.

If the man is old enough to carry a side arm, then he's old enough to defend himself from players at the table.

I know Liz, or as I first knew her, Lilith, is awesome. But has she done some particularly awesome thing recently or is the universe just coming to full recognition of her?

I have ever been a fan of Lilith/Liz, her cookies welcomed me to the boards way back when.

But my thanks here are for a kindness she performed in September, discovered by myself just this last week, and I feel like such the cad for not thanking her profusely before now.

On a side note, Gorbacz and Asgetrion

Liz is just AWESOME as awesome gets!

Gninja Awesome!

Thanks Liz!

God Bless Lou Agresta.

Thank you Mr. Brandon Hodge, you are ever a Southern gentleman and a scholar.

What a lovely Easter treat.

I hope there is an Adivion mini someday.

In my campaign, where the players are actually interacting with Professor Lorrimor in four 'epilogue' sessions some years before Haunting of Harrowstone and leading up to the events of Carrion Crown, its the professor who has a 'hunch' that his former student and now patron Adivion may be planning some nefarious ends with the years he has had the Professor research parts of a certain formula (the Carrion Crown).

In brief, not only does the Professor gather a cadre of students to oppose Adivion (the PCs), ultimately the Professor 'adjusts' certain parts of the formula which in turn convinces Adivion he himself can be the host for the Whispering Tyrant. So as Adivion places the elixir upon his lips, it's the professor who gets the last laugh after all.

Like a Neutral Good version of:
     
“To the last, I grapple with thee; From Hell's heart, I stab at thee; For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee”

I am sorry to hear you are having great difficulties with the publishers in your area Graziano. Perhaps someone like Vic Wertz or Erik Mona will have some insight on how to help here.

I know is small comfort (not to mention not in your native tounge) but all the rules, player classes, monsters and core game information are available here for free. Again it is not in Itallian but it is at least a starting point. Also regarding the Adventure Paths, there are PDFs available on the Paizo store which can at least help in part with your immediate need in completing the Adventure Paths you may have.

Good luck, I hope the publishers are not 'nella pentolino pieno di fumo, c'è poca pappa!'

If Erik Mona wants to mount Paizo Itallian campaign, I will, with a heavy heart, relocate to beautiful Italy to start Paizo Southern Europe {TM} (Tan Marks) ... I'll start working on my crisp linen suits, er .... resume now.

I've heard of those names listed above before.

Aren't these guys the high level Imperial officers on board the Death Star plotting the downfall of the Rebellion with Grad Moff Tarkin and Darth Vader?

All hail the conquering hero!

Can we place bets on who the next Iconic mini is?

: )

(my platinum is on Lem)

(sung very fast and boastful as in this example)

I truly am the very model of a modern day High Arch-Wizard,
Just for kicks I've Empowered Ice Storms in the middle of a blizzard.

Truth be told I have spell slots to spare of thus I have the wherewithal,
I can easily Heighten Rays of Frosts and even Quicken my Featherfall!

An unchallenged Grandmaster of the mystic Art I am as all can plainly see,
With skill ranks aplenty I can out climb a Rogue and out dance Eilistraee.

Why cast Light on a pebble when I can Summon a Greater Salamander to scorch my torch?
I've Gated Elementals, Solars and Pit Fiends to Prestidigitate the cleaning of my tower's porch.

Why open complex and tiresome locks when I can Disintigrate an Ademantine crate?
Why waste diplomacy on a lovely Princess when I can easily enunciate a Dominate?

Even my very Familiar Is a well trained double headed Advanced Fiendish Dragon blooded Unicorn,
At night I lay in my silken bed while forlorn Succubi and Erinyes read me Iggwilv's treaties on porn.

But by far my favorite Incantation of all up my arcanist sleeve,
And trust me here please, for in this matter I would not deceive.

When at times I am threatened by two hit dice worth of insects seeking to do me harm,
How I relish the simple joy of dispatching the diminutive vermin with a Maxmized Meteor Swarm.

I can neither confirm nor deny the extensive research and testing required to adequately put this map into production.

Product Request: Paizo The Drinking Game.

Product Design by Jason Bulhman and Tim Hitchcock.

(play tested by the Werecabbages)

Subscribers get a 15 percent discount on a liver transplant.

They must roll for each separately, so the XP is 400 by prisoner then divided by number of PC. (the point I am not sure is if it's divided amongst all PC or only those who beat the DC)

Divide the total among all the PCs, I am assuming they share this knowledge with their fellow party members.

Announced! Cover image is a mock-up and will change.

A Tim Hitchcock adventure.

Groovy.

SEXY.

So sexy!

Can you possibly outdo Roger E. Moore's Dancing Hut?

God Bless Roger E. Moore!

Naturally.

How else could Qadira be able to afford to pay its tithes and tributes to Cheliax?

Five New Factions in Play 
Ten Factions there be in All

In the Infernal Land of Cheliax 
Where Even Your Very Shadow Lies

Let the other factions have their petty prestige, their fleeting fame, their withered laurels and baubles in boons.

We of Cheliax will have to content ourselves with Ruling the World entire.

Eternally.

Infernally.

16. Your girlfriend wishes you were cheating on her with another girl because that would take less time away from her than PFS and Pathfinder campaigns do.

17. Your car service and taxi expenses to get to the games you play far exceed even you sizable book and growing mini collection expenditure.

I was just being coy myself Justin.

Ahem.

That's a great pic Liz!

But then again, there's always Xanesha :)

Very soon now the older fans can tell the newer fans, "back in my day Xanesha was a TPK machine, you kids have it soooo easy ...."

Oh I just thought of one!

With a Pride in his being and hubris in his heart, the newest darling of the fiction line, Wes, has taken the Test of the Starstone.

He failed.

His soul is judged and sent to the Nine Hells.

After millennia, he has risen through the ranks and is a Duke of Perdition and a direct vassal of one of the Archfiends who rule the layers.

What name and title would you give Wes?

Which of the Nine Archdevils would he serve?

What form form would he take ?

What favoured weapon would his cult bear?

Give an ability/power/skill/feat/trait unique to his cult.

What unholy symbol would he take ?

Would he have a consort?

Pssst.

We can combine many of the great ideas here.

What if the weapon wielded by Adivion was indeed itself a villain in the story, the players would be facing off against not one, but two adversaries with the same goals and lofty ambitions. This ancient weapon would be ever whispering in Adivion's ear, just as itself had learned the secrets of The Whispering Way millennia ago, now it in turn spurns Advison to the final end game. (If the players meet him through out the campaign, this would explain why at times Adivion acted in one manner and at other times he acted in another fashion, almost a dual personality // except that there ARE indeed two distinct personalities at work here.)

Now a weapon such as this need not be overly powerful, indeed all it need require is a high intelligence, and a willing and capable wielder, such as one Adivion Adrissant. And for those whom wish to still use the artwork provided in the AP but are drawn to the idea of a rapier wielding arch villain, simply have the weapon have the unique quality of being able to shift form and be any form of weapon that suited the wielders' need. When Adivion begins his transformation, the weapon finds itself transforming from a rapier to a glaive because of the very nature of the eldrich transformation that consumes Adivion.

And ...

Perhaps it was even this magical weapon that issued the order for the good Professor's early death.

What if in his many years of research the Professor found traces and snippets of knowledge linking Adivion's weapon to the Whispering Way and had tried to alert Adivion of his concerns. Adivion may not have the heart in ending a old friend/rivals life, but the weapon he wielded (or wielded him) had no such compunction. The weapon may even have seen Professor Lorrimor as a rival of Adivion's attention. Thus was the good Professor's fate sealed.

Just some thoughts.

I'm not sure if this is a blog question or an "ask James Jacobs" question but on an Depends incontinence scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being bad night at the movie theater with old pop corn and stale corn butter and 10 being so sick from eating unknown animal parts from a questionable three wheeled side cart in Bankok after a bender with my boys to stave off hunger because I did hallucinogens from Amsterdam that were smuggled in the pants of a Somoan percussionist - just how much “poop my pantaloons" or “brown my britches" are we talking here?

I try to keep my soiling jeans ready for those times.

Louis, your quiet persistence is awe-inspiring.

Regards,
Ruemere

That Lou Agresta is a good and decent fellow.

At least that's what he has pointedly told me numerous times.