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Deirdre "Dee" Sarini wrote:
I wonder if he knows Kanye the Giant...
"Where the club at at Isildur, yo? Kanye the Giant orders Alizé."
Two Romans walk into a bar and sit at the table. When the waiter comes over, the first customer asks for wine, and the second, a Martinus. The waiter asks "What is that?" The customer replies "You know what a Martinus is, don't you? Martinus, Martini, Martino, Martinum, Martinorum." The waiter goes away and brings the wine. "Where's my Martinus?" asks the second customer. "You declined the Martinus, sir" replies the waiter.
Last night (from 5 PM to 5 AM) was spent volunteering as a fill-in actor at a F~~&ING MASSIVE haunted house. Cool, but I never want to do that again. Also, I now know how background NPCs in video games feel repeating the same lines over and over again. By the end, I was tempted to tell the patrons all about the warriors from Hammerfell and their curved. Swords.
Tordek Rumnaheim wrote:
F@@+ you Mother Nature! Weekend Camping is not looking good. Thunderstorms and tents do not add up for a fun weekend. >:$
Freehold DM wrote:
Hence the "not to be confused." Sometimes I wonder if the Pakleds have an intellectual edge on Kim, Chakotay, Torres, and Janeway.
Why rag on the French when you can rag on French Canadians. They're not nearly as nice as the French, and they're much closer. *ducks*
A punk rock fable. Also a true story:
Once upon a time, in the far-off land of 2009, a band called The Andrea Doria was on tour, driving down the highway outside of Savannah, Georgia. Suddenly, the van lurched to a halt on the roadside, black smoke billowing from under the hood. The bass player, who was also a mechanic, deduced that a magician had made all of the engine oil disappear. The guitar player began dialing the venue to tell them that they were not going to make the gig. The singer attempted to flag down a car who could take them to a towing service. The drummer, who was the youngest of the bunch, began to panic. "What are we going to do? We're stranded a thousand miles from home, and our van is on fire," cried the drummer, "what are we going to do?" Shutting the hood of the van, the bass player turned to the drummer, laying a hand on the young man's shoulder. "Nothing," said the bass player. "We live here now."
In other news, I was able to buy a mattress & box spring from my roommate (who is moving out in a few weeks) in exchange for a $50 McDonald's gift card and a jar full of loose change. I can't actually sleep on the bed until my roommate moves out, since my current room in the apartment isn't big enough for a bed, but in a few weeks, I'll be able to sleep in a bed on a regular basis for the first time since junior year of college. This is my life.
Male Human Rogue 1 / Conjurer 3 / Mythic Trickster 2
GM Tordek wrote:
"Ahoy matey's, we seems to have lost our man'o'war somes where while we be spendin our booty at the local establishments. Ave's you seen it? It be a stout ship, wi' two oars. Aye, pillagin gives a man quite a thirst!"
Well that was sort of meta...
Ausk Valrosh wrote:
"And he hunted some stuff for this dude and he payed him with a handyhaversack.... Full of BEES!"
Spanky the Leprechaun wrote:
Anybody got a major household appliance delivered from Sears lately?
Speaking as a former Sears employee, they can eat a bag of dicks. No one gets trained (or paid on time, for that matter), and OSHA violations are rampant. Their new products are junk, and some of the stuff they advertise as being new is actually "refurbished" (A.K.A. sort of cleaned, with the dents pounded out, and not actually fixed in any way). Basically, nothing works, nobody gets paid, no one knows how do do things, including the managers, and everyone is basically just waiting there to get another job. There's a reason that Sears is the only job I've ever quit.
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
I promise I'll read this when I'm not up doing the Dog Bite Shuffle. Thank you. Seriously.
Dear potential client,
The fact that you're a non-profit organization does not mean that you do not have to pay me to do work for you. I like that you're putting on free concerts for the local alterna-youths, but I can't eat references, and I can't pay my rent with experience. Please come back with money, and then we'll talk.