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Cayden Cailean

Snorb's page

FullStar Pathfinder Society GM. 442 posts. No reviews. No lists. No wishlists. 2 Pathfinder Society characters.


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Liberty's Edge

Freddy the Fighter: ......and that's the last of the loot, all split up. So... what now?

Erik the Cleric: I'm going back to the Church of Bahamut. Gotta tithe some of this to the Dragon, you understand; plus, somebody's gotta sew that idiot bard back together.

Barto the Bard: (missing both arms and one and a half legs, and has a hole torn out of his throat) it only hurts when i pee ;_;

Freddy: Shut up, Bart. I think I can actually use this to pay the rent on the bar this month.

Rita the Rogue: And my share's going in our retirement fund, Fred! XD

Erik: You know, if the two of you are a couple, shouldn't you just get one share instead of two?

Rita: Not important.

Barto: someone find my other lung, i don't think the vampire sucked all the blood out of it ;_;

Amy the Alchemist: Shush, Bart. You guys know how many alchemy ingredients this'll buy? All of them. I'm looking sooooo forward to that Elemental Plane of Fire-produced alchemist's fire I found the recipe for. ^_^

Barto: i think some of my head's down to bare skull ;_;

Edvard Eddard, Evoker Extraordinaire: All right, fine, Bart's share goes to a Greater Restoration and a couple Regeneration spells. That'll leave him with... .......minus 750 gold.

Rita: Damn. Looks like we'll have to sell his rapier again.

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We never played 4e long enough to get magic weapons ;_;

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Charon's Little Helper wrote:
Snorb wrote:
James Jacobs wrote:
Silent Saturn wrote:
4. Weapons no longer have critical multipliers, they now have critical damage dice. A rapier, for example, might be "18-20/+2d4" while a wakizashi is "18-20/+1d8" and a scythe is "20/+2d12". This would allow different weapons to have more visibly different stats and thus make more room for new weapons to be released in previous books. It would also mean your Strength bonus et al. aren't multiplied on a crit anymore, which would make crits much less of a novablast and make the crit range of a weapon less important than it currently is.
I really really really am intrigued by and like this idea.
I toyed with this once. Maybe change x2 multiplier to +2d6, x3 to +3d6, and x4 to +4d6? And max base damage on a critical hit as well?
So - 4e's crit system?

Wouldn't know, I don't have my 4e books anymore. I was neatly ripping off borrowing this from the 5e playtest. =p

EDIT: just Googled "D&D 4e critical hits," turns out that it's "Max damage, and that's it for the most part." Which is lame as hell sometimes.

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James Jacobs wrote:
Silent Saturn wrote:
4. Weapons no longer have critical multipliers, they now have critical damage dice. A rapier, for example, might be "18-20/+2d4" while a wakizashi is "18-20/+1d8" and a scythe is "20/+2d12". This would allow different weapons to have more visibly different stats and thus make more room for new weapons to be released in previous books. It would also mean your Strength bonus et al. aren't multiplied on a crit anymore, which would make crits much less of a novablast and make the crit range of a weapon less important than it currently is.
I really really really am intrigued by and like this idea.

I toyed with this once. Maybe change x2 multiplier to +2d6, x3 to +3d6, and x4 to +4d6? And max base damage on a critical hit as well?

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Caineach wrote:
Snorb wrote:
** spoiler omitted **

** spoiler omitted **

Overall, the kids were decent actors that didn't make me want to strangle them, Chris Pratt played Dinosaur Lord, and the female lead was forgettable. So better than I expected.

I just wish the movie didn't revolve around everyone being a complete moron to actually get the situations set up. The first movie was at least sabotage causing the major failure. Here, pretty much everyone in any semblance of charge was an idiot. I mean, whoever set up the security and safety measures could not have been more incompetent.

That part in spoilers WAS FREAKING AWESOME

And regarding the massive manhandling of the idiot ball in order to get Indominus out of her paddock and get things a-rollin', I think it's implied that Hoskins and/or Wu deliberately set some things up

Spoiler:
to test militarization of dinosaurs.

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1 person marked this as a favorite.

Spoiler:
Look, I saw Indominus rex, which was half tyrannosaurus, half raptor, part cuttlefish, part tree frog, part therizinosaurus, and (allegedly) part human, get its ass kicked by a tyrannosaurus and a raptor before a mosasaurus clamped down on Indominus's head and neck and dragged it underwater to its death, my $$$ was well-spent.

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You know that those classes/feats/items can just be reflavored to be as extremely generic as possible so you can use them outside of Golarion. =p

(Incidentally, ioun stones seem to have slipped by into the SRD even though those are named after Ioun, Greyhawk's god of knowledge...)

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Krensky wrote:
Snorb wrote:

The setting I'm working on uses this for money:

Platinum - The size of an Ike dollar. [I love these coins and I seriously wish they caught on in the 70s.]

Gold - The size of a Kennedy half-dollar. [Wish these caught on too.]

Silver - The size of a Sacajawea or President gold dollar. [Need I say it?]

Copper - The size of a dime [Because, as adventurers hate CP so much, I've really grown to hate dimes.]

You have that backwards. Massively so. More valuable metals mean smaller coins.

The current US gold bullion coin is the American Buffalo. It is about the size of a Ike dollar and contains a Troy ounce of 24k gold. It has a face value of $50 and a real value of something like $1500.

There's some electrum in those coins anyway. =p (Sorry for the late reply, the last two days have been WEIRD for me.)

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I am of the school that using two weapons is almost never a good idea.

That said, though, using two arc pistols can potentially get you a total of 2d8 damage, assuming both pistols find their mark. The arc rifle only gets you 2d6 from one shot; however, it'll be more accurate than using two guns, and have a longer range.

An arc rifle can also be fired on full-auto per the automatic weapon property, so, all things considered, I'd go with the arc rifle.

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Amy the Alchemist: What?! Just because I've spent the last six years developing all kinds of potions, and testing six different varieties of potential mutagens and cognatogens on myself... and others... doesn't make me creepy! It's all for science!!

Rita the Rogue: What about the bombs?

Amy: Just because I can combine ordinary water and powdered copper and turn them into an explosive doesn't make me creepy either. >_<

Freddy the Fighter: Look, we're only asking because some of us think you might be taking the whole "SCIENCE~!!" thing a bit too far. Like... well... Erik thought you were really hot and probably wouldn't want to see some kind of vestigial mini-Amy growing out of your neck, or a tail, or a third arm, or something.

Amy: Well, I was thinking about working on growing wings, and they totally would have worked if you guys hadn't stopped me.

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1 person marked this as a favorite.

The setting I'm working on uses this for money:

Platinum - The size of an Ike dollar. [I love these coins and I seriously wish they caught on in the 70s.]

Gold - The size of a Kennedy half-dollar. [Wish these caught on too.]

Silver - The size of a Sacajawea or President gold dollar. [Need I say it?]

Copper - The size of a dime [Because, as adventurers hate CP so much, I've really grown to hate dimes.]

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3A. Not every class needs to be magical. I'm doing an OSR-inspired game, and the mage in it is the only magical class. By comparison, the fighter is just really, really, really, really good at killing people.

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Milo v3 wrote:


So, no different from normal, except if you want your character to have a title in the setting, some GM's might argue it's against RAW.... Yeah that sounds bad. I hope they don't return if there is a second or revised edition of Pathfinder.

Nothing's actually stopping you from writing "Esquire" at the end of your character name or "The Right Lord-Baron" in front of it either! (...Does this mean that if I call myself the Lord Baron Whoopass von Badass and I get nine fighter levels, my full name is Lord the Right Lord-Baron Whoopass von Badass? Warrants further investigation)

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They were pretty much "Hey, you! Yeah, you! You actually managed to get through nine levels of Dungeons & Dragons without becoming body bag filler! You proved yourself to be among the biggest badasses that ever walked Oerth! You can now add the following to the front of your character's name:"

  • Lord/Lady (if you are a fighter)
  • Patriarch/Matriarch (if you are a cleric)
  • Magus/Maga (if you are a magic-user)
  • Master Thief (if you are a thief; title is gender-neutral)
  • Master/Mistress (if you are a mystic)
  • Dwarf-Lord/Dwarf-Lady (if you are a dwarf)
  • Lord Magus/Lady Maga (if you are an elf)
  • Sheriff (if you are a halfling; title is gender-neutral and may or may not actually grant you the authority of the law, ask your DM)

And then you went on to gain more levels.

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1 person marked this as a favorite.

Yeah, they called it Body, Mind, and Soul, but Body and Soul both affected your max Health, and Mind and Soul both affected your max Mind Points (which you blew through in 2e like Tony Montana and that mountain of cocaine from the end of Scarface.) (Incidentally, Soul was no more expensive to buy in BESM than Body or Mind were, even though Soul is clearly much better than Body and Mind.)

I was leaning more towards Firefly RPG and/or the World of Darkness's three stat categories =p

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Well, this is frustrating. I wrote a post about how I'd do it and it seems to have up and vanished into the ether. >=/

Anyway. If it were up to me, here's how I'd do it:

You now have three stats. We'll call them, for want of better terms, Physical, Mental, and Social.

Physical would cover all attack rolls, melee/thrown damage rolls, maximum HP, carrying capacity, Armor Class (lost when flat-footed), and skills like climbing, jumping, not getting sick ever, and eating fifty pork roll sandwiches in an hour without throwing up.

Mental would cover your general magic-itude: spell save DC, bonus spell slots, saves versus magic, and stuff like logical thought, appraisal and identifying magical items, and knowing just which card to play during a hand of seven-card Napoleon. (Which is a very legit interesting game, look it up!)

Social would cover things like bluffing your opponents, intimidating them into backing down during combat, convincing the tavern drunk to buy you a drink, trying to get the half-elf rogue into bed with you, and convincing her half-orc fighter boyfriend to not tear out your liver.

Skills, of course, would have to be condensed as well. But so it goes.

Cyrad wrote:
The question is...why?

Because some of us enjoy gamecrafting, some of us think quality-of-life improvements might add something to the game, a select few are spitballing ideas for projects of their own. The possibilities are ENDLESS~

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I'm not disappearing, Blanc! I'm still heeeeeeeeeeeeere cried the dust speck

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Hmm. It would be interesting to see Weapon Focus/Specialization/Greater Weapon Focus/Greater Weapon Specialization grant additional effects if you have a feat like Signature Weapon.

You might be on to something here, Luthorne!

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1 person marked this as a favorite.

Out With a Bang
Die from a succubus's energy drain. (In exactly that way.)

Go Go Power Wizards
Get a Colossal construct to fight a kaiju.

Whacked 'Em All
Kill one of every creature in the Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Bestiary.

Thou Art a Smite-Meister
Kill one of every creature in all four Bestiaries.

Scroll of Genocide
Kill enough of one creature to drive it to extinction.

Blessed Scroll of Genocide
Kill enough of one creature type to drive it to extinction.

Killin' Ain't Easy
A ranger in your party has to retrain a favored enemy because of the Scroll of Genocide achievements.

It's Not Throat Cancer
Earn twenty levels of the vigilante class.

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Stefan Hill wrote:
Kthulhu wrote:

I vote we also advance the spell progression charts a bit to even out the spellcasters.

Of course, we'll need to create 10th - 19th level spells so that they can advanced to having something more powerful than they begin with.

If you don't want a tonne (or ton) of lawyers coming down on Paizo then 10th level spells are out. Dark Suns (2e) had 10th level spells and it wasn't part of the OGL I believe. So Casters can have levels 1-9 and then 11-19 spells only I'm afraid. To balance out this how about all Melee classes start with only one leg? They of course can get another by spending feats.

Other than that, I like the way you are going with this Kthulhu.

On the other hand, the 3e Epic Level Handbook does have a small selection of theoretical tenth-level spells, and those are open content.

Hmm. You might be onto something after all here.

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More like "changed mind about character, went with something else instead." So... yes?

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I had a halfling paladin once ;_;

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#1. Make Armor Class a more viable investment for later levels.

#2. Please God drag CMB/D behind the woodshed and Old Yeller it. Go back to opposed melee attack vs. Str/Dex check.

#3. Give fighters the marking ability from Fourth Edition (marked opponent takes a -2 penalty to attack not-you, moving away from you, even to 5' shift, provokes an opportunity attack), the fighter second wind from Fifth Edition (swift action, recover 1d10 + your fighter level HP on the spot, once per encounter tho), and possibly the fighter's BAB from d20 Munchkin (it starts at +2 and goes up, baby, up!!)

#4. Change Knock's range from Medium Range to "Touch; any traps on the object go off, that's your fault for not rolling a rogue."

#5. Add the Alchemist and Magus to the core rulebook classes. Alchemists are cool. Magi are cool.

#6. Everyone gets the equivalent of Spring Attack and Shot on the Run.

#7. Make feats a bit more meaningful than "+2 to two quasi-related skills."

#8. Ninth level should be The Return of First Edition D&D Name Levels.

#9. Fix the damn Jade Regent caravan rules. Those could have been so awesome if done properlike. Realizes that the caravan rules could be adapted for a stripped-down Pathfinder starfaring game.

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Everyone who keeps saying "Give Fighters more stuff."

I'm perfectly fine with "Just give them 4e marking, 5e second wind, possibly the Fighter BAB from Munchkin."

But I'm bad at game design.

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I didn't, I only ran the game. (Said game also involved an anthropomorphic penguin whose two primary languages were Penguin and "(slowly imitating throat slashing)."

Ziggy said he took the cleric levels just so he could get more uses of Channel Positive Energy than what the paladin levels he took gave him. (And yes, he had both Extra Channel and Extra Lay on Hands.)

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When I ran The Harrowing, I had a cleric/paladin who was only wise enough to cast cleric cantrips.

But man, was he great with Channel Positive Energy and paladin spells! (10 Wisdom and 26 Charisma)

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Jon Irenicus Memorial Achievement
Kill the end guy long before you're supposed to, thus sending the entire campaign to a crashing halt while the DM tries to regroup.

(I swear, we were SO CLOSE to this in our group's 5e game...)

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3 people marked this as a favorite.

@James Jacobs: Phantasy Star II, Planet's Edge, and (technically) Chrono Trigger would prove you wrong! =p

Anyway, I'd dearly love to see a Jade Regent: Anniversary Edition that at least makes the caravan rules useful.

Failing that, I'll settle for 450 pages of "Why I'm So Awesome, by Ameiko Kaijutsu."

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Technically, 29 if you're going by what's in the SRD. (Which I imagine's gonna shoot up to 36 once Occult Adventures and Ultimate Intrigue come out.)

And no, I'm not adding prestige classes into this. =p

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Excellent, because I just found a picture! This one, right here!

(It's literally the only one I could find that wasn't fanservicey.)

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kyrt-ryder wrote:

If my comment came out aggressive or hostile that was not my intention.

I was just filling in the blanks for my bad-at-balance-buddy Snorb ^^

S'all good. =D

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Amazingly, it's very difficult to find a picture of a Japanese woman dressed like a cowboy. >_<

Please stand by.

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I said "is bad at game balance!" =p

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Maybe give monks a way to meditate and get X amount of ki back after an hour or so? Is bad at game balance

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All righty. I can't tell if the boards are having another Moment like they were last night (when I started working on my character and the boards crashed while I was working on skills argh argh argh argh argh) so let's try this son of a building block again!!!

Stat Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (4, 4) = 8 + 3 = 11
Stat Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (9, 7) = 16 + 1 = 17
Stat Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (3, 1) = 4 + 5 = 9
Stat Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (4, 10) = 14 + 2 = 16
Stat Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (10, 4) = 14 + 2 = 16

Skill Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (4, 9) = 13 + 2 = 15
Skill Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (4, 2) = 6 + 3 = 9
Skill Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (5, 6) = 11 + 2 = 13
Skill Roll: 2d10 ⇒ (3, 1) = 4 + 5 = 9

Well, aren't I reasonably average in almost every way. XD

Character Sheet:

Keisuke "Kei" Nagato
-=-=-
Stats
Strength: 16
Coordination: 17
Observation: 16
Stature: 5 (rounded from 9)
Luck: 6 (rounded from 11)
-=-=-
Skills

Combat Skills
Automatics: 0
Blades: 0
Brawling: 1
Energy Weapons: 0
Pistols: 3
Rifles: 0

General Skills
Gambling: 9
Gunsmithing: 15
Prospecting: 9
Survival: 13

-=-=-
Trait
Posse Killer: Kei can switch targets during a shootout without losing a count.
-=-=-
Accuracy
Careful Shot: 17 (Coordination)
Steady Shot: 9 (1/2 Coordination, round up)
Hip Shot: 4 (1/4 Coordination, round down)
Fanning: 3 (better of 1 or Pistols)
-=-=-
Equipment
Clothing (two sets, plus a military greatcoat with some military patches removed)
Gunsmithing Kit
Revolver (Comet Chaser Model VI) + .38 ammo
Enough credits to get by
-=-=-
Aboot
Growing up on the impoverished planet Seiryuu, Kei often had to make do with what little she could find. She joined the planet's military when she turned nineteen, hoping that the stability would be a means for a better life. The People's Army of Seiryuu taught her some fine things about pistols, along with some basic wilderness survival skills.

These skills came in handy when Seiryuu and its sister worlds (Suuzaku, Genbu, Byakko, and Kohryu) declared independence from the Core Worlds. Kei and her fellow soldiers were on the wrong side of history as the People's Army was thoroughly routed. Two months passed between "Where the hell's my evac!?" and a way offworld arrived.

Five years have passed; Kei's been getting by since then as a hired gun.
-=-=-

Answers to Some Burning Questions:

1. I'm kinda partial to the Frontier; after all, this is a sci-fi western!

2. Hmm. I think it'd be best if there's several governments (a confederacy government and a republic, if you will, wink wink) vying for control of certain major systems, while the rest are pretty much "Yeah, we'll police ourselves, TYVM."

3. I do love Earth-That-Was as a basis for sci-fi. (However, I do think that whatever systems and worlds we end up on, should be distant enough from Earth that "even the visible stars here are beyond the detection range of Earth, circa 2015.")

4. I'm fine with genetically engineered humanoids, maybe even some planets where society decided the SCA people were right and we're gonna build castles from the local stone and we're using swords and shields. Nooooo aliens. (And no Weird West stuff. That's what Savage Worlds: Deadlands is for! XD)

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Dotting this from my phone; you're gonna get a full n complete character doohickey when I can get home!

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Aelryinth wrote:

I don't mean to be a killjoy....but couldn't you just take the Synthesist Summoner rules and reflavor them to be "Spinny form change to overly cute magical girl x", change tentacles to ribbons, horns to tiaras, serpentine to elastic body or more ribbons?

I mean, its right there...stat upgrades, AC upgrades, size upgrades, extra HP that aren't your own, magical powers, etc.

You could even have the spell powers as 'I call upon my true friends the Ponies of Light!" and have flavored Summonings. Or sorc-like bloodline effects, i.e. Summoner magic, but all spontaneous and from a themed group, like fire spells, wind spells, etc.

==Aelryinth

Oh my God.

THIS IS BRILLIANT

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1 person marked this as a favorite.

And while I agree that knocking one of the saves to Poor to compensate for the better HD and BAB is a good thing, somehow I don't think Will was the right decision there.

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Hey, now, I can get on with "extremely lethal combat." I enjoy High Adventure Cliffhangers and Savage Worlds, after all! ^_^

(goes to figure out the best way to come up with a Soldier Who Fought on the WRONG Side of the War idea)

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kestral287 wrote:
Gilfalas wrote:
Snorb wrote:
Hell, I'd be fine with "Pick Strength or Dexterity, you can use that for unarmed attack and damage" at first level,...
Why (except RP) would anyone ever choose Str in that case? With Dex supplying so many more abilities to the character and how badly monks suffer from M.A.D. everyone would choose dex.

Dragon Style.

I got nothing beyond that. D:

Yeah, neither do I. The benefits of posting when you've been up for fourteen hours!

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Technically, ki strike got worse in the transition to Pathfinder! (You need 1 ki to do a ki strike, as opposed to "I can do this starting at fourth level" in 3.5e.)

Personally, I'd be fine if you as a monk could run up straight vertical surfaces (or water, or both) using ki, or if you could fire energy blasts like out of Dragon Ball Z using ki, or if Wholeness of Body was altered to act like the paladin's Lay on Hands does.

Hell, I'd be fine with "Pick Strength or Dexterity, you can use that for unarmed attack and damage" at first level, along with "You can move and at least make a non-flurry full attack."

I think what you're looking for is the Unchained Monk. I don't like it much, but you might.

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1 person marked this as a favorite.

64. The gods don't want me, I don't know which end of a longsword goes through my enemy's head, I don't feel like getting three meals of torture a day for screwing up thievery, and the last time I tried to jest in the town square, a half-orc punched me in the throat. Wizarding's all I've got left.

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Fun phenomena about the history of psionics in D&D: Monks in Fourth Edition are psychic. (It was supposed to be ki for their power source, but the devteam couldn't think of any other classes to give ki to, and ki as a power source was just "psionic powers but Asian" and they couldn't do that without looking racist. So yeah. That's why the 4e monk is considered a psychic character.)

(Why do I bring this up? Gygax hated the monk, too. =p)

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Dotting for intrigue!

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4 people marked this as a favorite.

8. We couldn't all get into bard college. >=(

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Name: Xazz'rav
Race: Drow
Origin: Menzoberranzan, and I absolutely refuse to believe I actually spelled that right on the first try.
Adventure: Battle of Bloodmarch Hill
Location: The caves just outside Trunau
What Done It: Party member absence, rules that don't really come up so much in Pathfinder

Last Time, on Dragon Ball Z: Our party's extremely racist dwarven druid discovered the definitions of karma and irony as he was killed by the party member that most represents his utter hatred of orcs, so we had to go meet his replacement.

Enter Xazz'rav, a drow rogue who combined Piranha Strike with the finest of elven weaponry, the Colt M1911A1 elven curveblade. He proves how awesome he is (and how excellently he teams up with Waldo the halfling who occupies large opponents' fighting space) in the next fight.

And Exit Azure: Azure's player couldn't make it tonight, so Azure went... well, hell if I know. She just up and vanished. The four remaining party members go into the eeeeeeeeeeevil caves up outside Trunau anyway.

This proved to be a mistake; I blew all my Channel Energy uses trying to kill a swarm of ghost rats, the party thoroughly gets its ass kicked but we persevere.

CHAIN OF PAIN: Then we fight gryphs and spiders. We easily defeat them and move on, and then things get bad when we run into Our Villain, the tattooed half-orc who might or might not be leading the orc army.

.....And his two dire wolves.

.....And his flood troll pal.

.....And his alchemist buddy.

During this fight, we discover:

  • No matter how high you can get your Armor Class with judicious arcanum use, a good roll on a d20 will ruin your day, as Rogen learned.
  • The Healing hex actually does have a specific range (touch) as I learned.
  • Halflings really shouldn't use Strength as a dump stat, as Waldo learned.
  • Rogues aren't exactly the most durable character class, as Xazz learned.

Deep Hurting: Xazz'rav keeps going up and down like a Yo-Yo Ball as my feeble healing spells keep healing him back into consciousness (then the wolves knock him back into a coma, repeat until bored.) Rogen's holding his own against the troll, the orc escapes with the big-ass hammer we were trying to stop him from getting, and then Xazz goes down, his spirit grabbing my shaman and telling her "Do everything you can... to keep me alive," telling a messed up story about how "if [he] lives, my f#~*ing nephews will NEVER get my money, mwahahahahaha."

Me: (decides he's delirious from blood loss)
Waldo: What.

Like Russian History...: Things get worse. Xazz goes down for the fourth time. I go down (but stabilize on a natural 20; our DM refused to use the Fifth Edition "roll a 20 on your stabilize check, come back to life at 1 HP" rule like I wanted.) One of the wolves goes down. The alchemist... I honestly don't remember what happened to him; I think he's dead. The troll is eventually killed as Waldo too joins us in a time-out. The one potion we have in the party doesn't fully rouse me, so Rogen knows things are serious.

He takes my healer's kit and starts operating on me.

My Light spell ends, so he winds up having to light a torch (that he forgot he had...) to keep working on me.

The Obscure Rules Part Kicks In Here: Treat Deadly Wounds takes one hour in-game to do, unless you have certain ways to mitigate that that I'm too lazy to look up right now (it's 1:15 am and I really should be asleep...) If you're unconscious for an hour because you're in the red when it comes to HP, you need to make a DC 10 Con check. Succeed, and you're awake but can't do strenuous actions. Fail, and you lose 1 HP and need to make another check in an hour.

I regain enough HP from Rogen's (untrained!!) Heal check to perform surgery on me, and Waldo wakes up because he actually rolled good on that Con check. Unfortunately for Xazz'rav... he did not fare so well on his Con check.

He had 8 Constitution.

The three surviving party members, two of whom have massive Strength and Constitution injuries, get the hell out of Dodge to go regroup.

Cory, Rogen's Player: By the way, you know who's to blame for all this, right?
Me: We're not gonna blame the healer, are we? =(
Cory: What? No. This is all Damien's fault!
Mike, Xazz's Ex-Player: Huh?
Cory: He's a sorcerer! If he showed up today, then we would have had attack magic! Snorb wouldn't have blown all his channels on those g&$$#+n ghost rats!
Booke, Waldo's Player: All in favor of blaming Damien for Xazz dying?
All of Us: (raise hands) Aye!
Booke: All opposed?
Dead Silence: (nothing happens)

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Kerry the Cavalier: :D (he's straddling so that one foot is on one horse and his other foot is on another horse)

Freddy the Fighter: .....You can't be serious.

Derril the Dorfen Druid: He says he can ride two horses at once, lad. I tol' 'im that was a stupid idea. Looks like I owe him ten gold. Damn.

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Oh, boy! Time to post what I lovingly call my summer reading list! =p (And yes, I realize a couple of these are from the 19th Century and not the 20th. Oh well.)

When Gravity Fails - George Alec Effinger
Middle Eastern-inspired cyberpunk.

Neuromancer - William Gibson
THE definitive classic cyberpunk novel.

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream - Hunter S. Thompson
Based on a true story...ish. The movie's not bad, either.

The Aeneid - Virgil

The Odyssey - Homer

Around the World in Eighty Days - Jules Verne

Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea - Jules Verne

The Essential Tales and Poems of Edgar Allan Poe - Edgar Allan Poe

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz - Lloyd Frank Baum

Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon - Naoko Takeuchi
...Don't judge me!

Casino Royale - Ian Fleming
♪I've seen diamonds cut through harder men/Than you yourself, but if you must preEEEEEEEteeeennnnd, you may meet your eeeeeeeend~

Brain Droppings - George Carlin

Napalm and Silly Putty - George Carlin

When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? - George Carlin

I Hated Hated HATED This Movie - Roger Ebert
Title taken from his review of the movie "North." A compilation of his "finest" zero to one-star reviews.

Your Movie Sucks - Roger Ebert
Title taken from his review of "Deuce Bigelow: European Gigolo," which the book starts with. More reviews of movies that never should have been greenlit.

A Horrible Experience of Unbearable Length - Roger Ebert
Title taken from his review of "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen." Yet even more reviews of godawful movies.

The Silmarillion - J. R. R. Tolkien and Christopher Tolkien

Julius Caesar - William Shakespeare

The Guide - R. K. Narayan
I read this in college.

The English Patient - Michael Ondante
I read this in college, too. Better than the movie because it doesn't shove the love story in your face.

The Ridiculous Race - Steve Hely and Vali Chandrasekaran

Dungeons & Dragons: Oriental Adventures - James Wyatt et al
The supplement for Third Edition, not the one from the 80s.

Dungeons & Dragons: Player's Handbook (Fifth Edition) - Wizards D&D Design Team
...That's what it said on my receipt, anyway.

Liberty's Edge

2 people marked this as a favorite.
GoldEdition42 wrote:
It's worse if you have a TPK and people bring in a new class. With no history working the data (or studying up on the powers) there is a TON of referring to sourcebooks/websites....the battles can take the whole night.

Freddy the Fighter: ...So, who exactly hired us for this quest?

Amy the Alchemist: From what I remember, you got hired because Rando the Ranger picked a fight with some half-orcs and they beat him into blood paste. What a mess...

Rita the Rogue: Yeah, the two of us got hired after that dragon ate the cavalier and the brawler. What about you, Erik?

Erik the Cleric: You guys hired me after your bard slept with that succubus and got his soul sucked out, remember?

Freddy: So... the original four party members all died, and we got hired to replace them as they bit it.

Rita: I... guess this means we don't really have a reason to be on this quest anymore, then.

Amy: Yeah, you're right. Let's go to the tavern and get drunk. I can use the booze for alchemy ingredients, anyway. ^_^

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