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Ethereal Marauder

Miss Kitty's page

445 posts. Alias of Ambrosia Slaad.


1 to 50 of 445 << first < prev | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | next > last >>

2 people marked this as a favorite.
lynora wrote:
I recently bought a new small garbage can for my office area, but I keep finding my cats in it. Apparently what I actually bought was a cat bed. :)

Yes, small garbage cans are almost as perfect as cardboard boxes.

I was reading about how people responding to cats in trouble use mesh washing bags to restrain them without causing stress, which was a new idea to me. I'm thinking about stopping by the closeouts store on Monday and buying a mesh pop-open/pop-up laundry bag for our remaining cat as a semi-private "duck people blind"/cat fort.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Still no dire corgi. Rats.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Emperor Floyd wrote:
Devoted Pet Kitty wrote:
I don't like sunshine... =-_-=
I don't like Sunshine either. We must stop this lie.

I really liked Sunshine, except for the stupid crazy slasher ending part. I didn't even mind the weird premise, involving q-balls converting the solar matter into something exotic or something. I still cry at the end of the "shield repairs" scene.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

{harks up hairball}

11 people marked this as a favorite.
FiddlersGreen wrote:

Has anyone seen my pet kitty Hastur?

"Haaas-turrr. Hastur? Hastur!"

The judges would also have accepted Hastur, Pussycat! Ia! Ia!

2 people marked this as a favorite.

{fails Will save vs. Courtfool mind control}

{in monotone:} You should play HERO. It is the best.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Freehold DM wrote:
NobodysHome wrote:

OK. Re-reading it, it really is politics and such. If you'd rather I delete it, just let me know within the hour and I'll remove it. After that, I'm sure we can flag down Chris and have her destroy it.

is at work

bike in scabbard grows lambent

Wha? The bike is glowing! It must sense something.

brandishes bike

Bike of Fawtl, give me sight beyond sight!

looks in spoiler

It's toeing the to delete than to risk flaming bikes being thrown at you.

Reeerrrr, Freehold-O, you did it! We're safe once again, snarf, snarf! {cue chorus singing FaWTLCats theme}

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Drejk wrote:

One (or two) of which should be monsters.

Well I have one monster on drawing board (metaphorically, I don't draw... much).

Since it's for the River Kingdoms, maybe a fey version of one (or more) of these cats? Bonus points if they can be gained as a familiar.

2 people marked this as a favorite.
John Kretzer wrote:
I Blame Cosmo for the extreme drama my niece has created today...I got woken up by her yelling at her bf over the phone...and it just got worse from there.
John Kretzer wrote:
I Blame Cosmo older Sister and older brother were going out to dinner...I said I would like to go so they decided to pick a place they knew I would not like.

I blame Cosmo that Calgone has twice refused to take Master Kretzer and Floyd away.

6 people marked this as a favorite.

Could be worse.

I'm a little surprised you have a "Cheryl Tunt" alias, but not one for Babou.

2 people marked this as a favorite.
John Kretzer wrote:
I Blame Cosmo for yet again being invaded by my brother's kids.

I blame Cosmo that Master Kretzer has not supplied Floyd with at least a cardboard pillbox and Nerf machine gun to repel the dread invaders.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Kobold Cleaver wrote:
It's kind of like dog years, except much shorter. Except Twinkie years. Those go a bit longer.

Now I want to feed Twinkies to my neighbor's dog to make him immortal.

No, I briefly saw Courtfool too. I think he must be trapped in the Tholians' interphasic-spatial rift while he was investigating the marooned USS Defiant. {goes back to writing Kirk/TJ Hooker/Denny Crane poly slashfic}

CourtFool wrote:
What's going on here?!

{spit-takes catnip mojito} HOLY S$~&! Courtfool?!

{sideeyes mojito} Damn, that's some powerful 'nip if I'm hallucinating him. And those government-sponsored chemtrails wafting out of CDP's butt.

John Kretzer wrote:
I Blame Cosmo that my cat Floyd did not come home this morning like he usually does. I am not writing him off yet... as my brother is up with his kids and Floyd hates them( well he only really likes me but he can tolerate most people except for little kids), but I am slightly worried.

I sincerely hope Floyd makes it home safely and gives you extra affection by way of an apology.

Tels wrote:
I blame Cosmo for John delusionally believing cats actually like people.

Cats like to play aloof and act picky, but they are often very affectionate when they choose to be.

{puffs away on catnip hookah}

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Yep, kobolds are weaker than human commoners.

Ah, AH! By RAW, what do I do?! I don't have a copy of Poodlefinder Unleashed!!!

The Monday Monster wrote:
Clinically Depressed Poodle wrote:
Oh, hello Monday. F*+$ you, and the MoMo you rode in on.
Why do you talk to me like that when you know I'll punt you?

{in best Boddicker impersonation (rather poorly done, actually):} Can you fly, MoMo?

{pretend tosses MoMo from imaginary van into imaginary traffic}

{chows down on puffins for breakfast}

Ceaser Slaad wrote:
Eagerly waiting to see what sort of chaos ensues when you cross Miss Kitty with the Humpday Monster.

{coolly smoking a clove cigarette and sipping a catnip mojito} Nah, I never forget to wear protection. {points at flea collar} See? Can't have kittens.

Hey, this year, April Courtfool's fell on a Hump Day!

Dang it, we all slept through Hump Day. Maybe my narcolepsy is contagious? Or there might be a gas leak in here?

Butt sniffing is a dog's life. And you smell of anchovies.

Not even your Hippeh chew toy?

{wakes up from extended narcoleptic nap} Frenchy, moi? Zhat is outrageous! I am Catalonian on my father's brother's nephew's cousin's former kennelmate's side.

Drejk wrote:
David M Mallon wrote:
Trying to get musicians to respond to e-mail messages is like trying to herd cats on meth.

{drops bag of blue kitty litter} I am the one who caterwauls.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

I also blame Cosmo for poor Floyd needing to go to the vet, and for poor Master Kretzer not having a ring of regeneration.

Tastes like gold and white!

Why did you pick up a level in necromancer, KC? It's a mechanically inferior class option.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
BigNorseWolf wrote:
Life is like a roll of toilet paper. the closer you get to the end the faster it goes.

{bats roll of toilet paper to watch it unspool on the floor} Therefore, it is reasonable to assume that "owning" (HA!) a cat shortens your life.

{horks up hairball on Sharoth, hugs the fuzzy matt}

One of the neighbors asked that we turn down the what. I didn't realize a what was that noisy.

{whispers:} I guess MoMo is sleeping in today.

{finally dislodges self from chimney} <WHUMP!>

Cough, cough, so what did I miss?

gran rey de los mono wrote:

I decided to get into the screenwriting business, but having no talent made that pretty difficult. Therefore, I decided to hire a bunch of employees to write the scripts for me. But people are too expensive, so I hired animals instead.

The horse was the first to turn in a script. It was ok, and I was tempted, but in the end I had to say neigh.

Next was the cow. Again, a decent script, but I asked for a TV show and she gave me a moo-vie.

The snake's first draft had too much skin, so I told him to shed it.

The elephant's script was fantastic. I'm sure it will really pachyderm the theaters.

The fish's script had so many spelling and grammar errors that I sent him back to school.

I had high hopes for the chimp's script, but it turned out she was monkeying around instead of writing.

The sheep's script was plagiarized. You can't pull the wool over my eyes.

Obviously, the skunk's script just stunk.

I hired a puppy as well, but she just piddled on the paper.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Emperor Floyd wrote:
I Blame Cosmo for that silly vet saying that I should not go out anymore....sigh silly human.

I blame Cosmo that Kretzer hasn't built you a cardboard box tower yet.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

{disconnects from Matrix} Whoa. I know kung fu.

{shakes head to clear dumpshock fog} No... wait. I know Courtfool.

8 people marked this as a favorite.
Freehold DM wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
so it snowed Saturday night into yesterday morning, not much just 2 inches, and despite living in a city we have a nice little field behind our house (we're almost downtown too, which makes it even rarer!) so i took our Beagle Peaches out to chase field mice, and the dumb ass dog is sitting there digging into the snow and turf going after this field mouse den while literally 2 feet behind him 15-20 lil mice are popping out of one hole in the snow making a mad dash 10 feet to another hole, the whole time Peaches is completely oblivious to what happening behind him.
An excellent example of why I love snow and cats.


Deep Rot wrote:
Emperor Floyd wrote:
Deep Rot wrote:
Emperor Floyd wrote:
Bring it Dog Boy.

... processing ...

TechNiCalLy HyENas Are MemBers Of The FeLiForm SubOrDer. Thus They Are FeLines Not CaNines. Dog Boy Would Be An InAcCurAte LaBel.

I was going with his name yellowDINGO.

... processing ...

ConFirmed. AckNowLedged. CorRecTion Filed. CarRy On.

I always assumed he was a dingo in a hyena costume, carrying on the tradition of dogs wearing costumes to frighten innocent food providers.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
yellowdingo wrote:
cannon fodder wrote:
yellowdingo wrote:
yellow things are a security threat to all cats're yellow...
Shh! Im trying to get a matching set of fur for boots and you are scaring them away.

If you're just after fur for boots, just brush out some cats.

This may or may not be first step in creating a hairballmunculus.

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Emperor Floyd wrote:
I Blame Cosmo for allowing dogs to even post on the Pazio boards.

I blame Cosmo for Floyd's ignorance of the Poodle Lords.

Emperor Floyd wrote:

Instead I found a video of a obviously mental handicapped cat deal with a banana.

I am not amused.

Wha-?! The cat is not mentally handicapped; he/she is obviously toying with his/her prey to exhaustion before delivering the killing bite and devouring its potassium-rich flesh. Oranges, pumpkins, and watermelon are also fair game.

yellowdingo wrote:
You can claim your empire all you like but yellow things are a security threat to all cats. Look at them...just lying there ploting.

I think you have cats confused with the Green Lantern Corp. And I have it on good authority that red rings have no vulnerability to the color yellow or stupid Hollywood screenplays.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Freehold DM wrote:
I do know at least one person who I was acquainted with in high school was amazed that there were pigeons going uneaten in ny. To him, it was the same thing as herds of bovines going uneaten as they wandered through the street.

That's silly... everyone in NYC knows that the herds of bovines move silently beneath the streets.

And the herds of cats travel by pneumatic tubes.

Tin Foil Yamakah wrote:

Lesson learned from last nights PFS game, There are packs of chihuahuas running wild in northern mexico, apparently these "swarms" swell to over 1100 in size.

I am so using a chihuahua swarm against my group, just gotta figure out the particulars damage special abilities and such any suggestions

Chihuahuas get tremble as a free action.

Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
Sharoth wrote:
Alleran wrote:
(So do cats, by the way. I'm quite certain that the only reason they don't evolve thumbs is because if they did, they'd have to do more work themselves.)
Cats with thumbs

You're all lucky most of us are drunk off our butts down here in the Keys.

{looks around for caretaker} You, Hoo-man! Fetch me another mojito and then move my chaise longue back into the sun.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Yelling Bird wrote:

Wait, wha?! Turkey is for eating, not f++@ing.

Unless you've been invited to the Poodle Lords clubhouse, in which case, EWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

I am sorry for freaking out when I see a mirror.

And for my inner monologue being in French.

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Adorable Fuzzball wrote:
Nyan Cat wrote:
Aberzombie wrote:
A cat uses its whiskers to determine if a space is too small to squeeze through.
And then we flip a coin, and on Tails, we try to squeeze in anyways.

And 75% of the time, make it anyway.

I love being an Ooze.


Hmmm, a sentient slime mold-ish critter that oozes under doors and through mouseholes, and has a Small animal alternate form. "Waitaminute! That's not fur! Ewwww!"

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