Celestial Gnome

Mad Wee Bee-King Bumtumbler's page

17 posts. Alias of Great Green God.


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Previously on Kingmaker:

Numalar Auritonius wrote:
Mad Wee Bee-King Bumtumbler wrote:
"And we all got enough problems as it is."
"What sort of problems do you have? It seems like your life is totally free! I envy that, actually."

"Oh ye know, daft, big job gits like yerselves, and dem wee, scaly, black, mine buggers, an everybody else who's after me lucky charms. Dere's jist no trustin' folk dese days. Put 'er dere Prince! *PTOO!* Royalty ta royalty!" He says sticking out a wee pink hand moist with spit.

sleight of hand: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (16) + 14 = 30

Item Stolen: 1 chalk, 2 chalk, 3 earplugs, 4 bag of powder 5 bag of powder, 6 empty scroll case, 7 empty scroll case, 8 sheet of parchment paper, 9 sheet of parchment paper, 10 wooden holy symbol, 11 wooden holy symbol, 12 a dose of saltpeter: 1d12 ⇒ 2 A stick of chalk from Numalar's gear very likely goes missing during the little man's stay in camp. A successful perception check against his sleight of hand result catches the culprit in the act.


Numalar Auritonius wrote:
RPGGGM wrote:
Party as a whole After the party's guests have had their fill of soap and bath beads what would you like to do?
Numalar is happy to continue drinking with the Bee-King and perhaps they can start swapping stories. If possible he will start asking questions about the area and what the Bee-King knows about the Stag Lord.

"Oh him. Yeah, he trucks with all sorts o' evil--black magic too. You cleared out a small nest o' 'em along the ol' road but there's more were dat came from. Lot's more. An' since he kilt all the druids--he hates druids ya see, like he's got a vendetta against them. Problem is druids is like part o' da land. It's like he hates the land itself. Well, since he kilt em all there none but that Tamris lad to stand against 'im and he's got his hands full protecting the whole of da Narlmarches. Ya see, dere's worse stuff a lurkin' about than the Stag Lord, older an more dangerous and willin' ta bide its time. It's a land full 'o monsters. I'd say more but names is powerful things. You say da wrong name an' it's like you're invitin' 'em ta tea, ya see. And we all got enough problems as it is."

1d20 + 14 ⇒ (4) + 14 = 18

And with dawn on its way they take their leave.

The day is nice and warm and a bit humid thanks to all the previous day's rain.

Let me know if you want to do anything specific (beyond exploring) for the day. If you press on for the day I need the following rolls:

Survival DC 15 and...

Perception (random looking about) DC 25:
There is a glass mason jar sitting on a branch 40 feet off the ground. The jar seems to be filled with various buttons.


"Er, um--I dinnae mean you...." he hazards to Scarlet hoping that sounds better. "Alright alright, ye kin owe 'em ta me. Could ye pass the soap?"


"De ya wanna see?" He releases Numalar's arm and hands back his charter only a little worse for the wear. He heartily smacks off all the dust as well. "Right. Here's yer wee paper-thingie. I'll jist take yer women folk as spoils o' war an' ye kin owe me one."


"I peefer not to specialize. *Pant, pant* I like ta leave me self open, ya see? 'Ands is only one o' me weapons. Ye should see what I kin do with a beer stein an' a codpiece." the Bee-King says beaming.


Numalar Auritonius wrote:

Oops... I see your Fight Speeder Upper... so:

Round 3: Move Action to remove hat (actually, the hat was thrown to the ground before the fight, but whatever)... i.e. move action to undo the Dirty Trick. Then Trip Attempt.
[Unimproved Trip (probably against flat-footed CMD)]1d20-2 Nope, not likely.

Round 4: My CMD is 10 so I don't think I am grappled. So...
[Punch]1d20+0; 1d2-2 Nope.

Round 5: Standard Action to Trip him again:
[Unimproved Trip]1d20-2 Yes! Well, Maybe.

AoO (if trip was successful and he tried to stand.)
[Punch]1d20+0; 1d2-2 Might be a hit if +4 Prone bonus applies.

Round 6: I am grappled now... Standard Action to escape grapple:
[Escape Artist]1d20+2 Probably not.

Round 7: He failed to maintain grapple, so... Combination punch!
[Punch, Right]1d20-2; 1d2-2 Maybe!
[Punch, Left]1d20-8; 1d2-2 Nope.

Round 8: I am grappled again... Standard Action to escape grapple:
[Escape Artist]1d20+2 Nope.

Round 9: I am pinned now... Standard Action to escape grapple:
[Escape Artist]1d20+2 Nope.

Do we continue?

Draconic Defense - Bee-King comically waggles his hand at the wrist after taking a poke at you then points off somewhere over your shoulder to the 'Stag Lord'. Numalar points off the other way at Nyrissa.

sense motive: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (2) + 9 = 11 Bee-King looses Dex to AC/CMD while looking about.

Round 3
Big hat - Instead the boondoggled Bee-King licks both his palms and uses them to pastes Numalar's own luxuriant mustache over his eyes. Numalar fixes this the very next round though now his mustache looks like two mashed out cigar stubs kept in place by his nose.
The trip misses.

Round 4
As Scarlet says, you slap at each other a bit.

Round 5
He rushes at you. You side-step and send him sprawling like a landed carp.

While he does trigger and AoO with his move action to rise, your fists are not registered as lethal weapons by local law enforcement and don't allow you to take a swipe at him.

Round 6
By his rolls he misses at another attempt at pinning Numalar down and more 'slapping' probably takes place--using your escape artist roll as a punch

Round 7
He does manage to grapple you but you very quickly break free--by way of my reverse logicking the previous round.

Round 8
This is followed by a vicious series of near-misses on the part of both combatants. (Using a modified 'left punch' die roll)

Round 9-10
He does finally get a hold of Numalar and pin him with an armlock.

In the background there is some idle chatter between Alia and Posh, and someone else is gently snoring.

"*Huff, puff, wheeze* Had enough? Say uncle. You're not half-bad laddy. Not bad atoll dese things ne'er goo ten rounds with me."


Wee Fist-Fight Speeder Upper:

ROUND 3 - unimproved dirty trick (pull hat down over eyes (blind), vs flat-footed CMD): 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (10) - 1 = 9

ROUND 4 - grapple: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (10) - 1 = 9

FUTURE ROUND CHECKS TO RE-ESTABLISH, MAINTAIN OR PIN - grapple: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (5) - 1 = 4

FUTURE ROUND CHECKS TO RE-ESTABLISH, MAINTAIN OR PIN - grapple: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (9) - 1 = 8

FUTURE ROUND CHECKS TO RE-ESTABLISH, MAINTAIN OR PIN - grapple: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (19) - 1 = 18

FUTURE ROUND CHECKS TO RE-ESTABLISH, MAINTAIN OR PIN - grapple: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (5) - 1 = 4

FUTURE ROUND CHECKS TO RE-ESTABLISH, MAINTAIN OR PIN - grapple: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (12) - 1 = 11

FUTURE ROUND CHECKS TO RE-ESTABLISH, MAINTAIN OR PIN - grapple: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (19) - 1 = 18


dice:
Numalar: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (2) + 5 = 7
Bee-King: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (7) + 7 = 14

Round 1
The Bold May Act!
__________________
__ Bee-King
__ Numalar

sweet science: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (13) + 6 = 19 non-lethal damage: 1d2 - 2 ⇒ (1) - 2 = -1 1 non-lethal point of damage negated by DR.

The Bee-King takes a swing at Numalar only his fist flies through the spot Numalar had been causing the Bee-King to spin completely around in place. After a moment of confusion he smiles evilly and ducks out of the way of Numalar's response. Note: Small punches are usually 1d2.

Round 2
The Bold May Act!
__________________
__ Bee-King
__ Numalar

feint: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (20) + 10 = 30

"Ohmygosh! Look o'er dere! Is dat the Stag Lord?!"


"Less talkin' muire fightin', ye wee milksop!" Shouts the little man one fist raised before him the other swinging at the end of his arm in a big circle. His leather-sandalled feet never stop moving.


"Frightened are ye? A prince among cowards, aye? 'Ave ta have yer Big Bessy 'ere fight fer yer collectable tissue paper aye. It's too bad she ain't got a skirt fer ye ta hide behind because I float like a fairie dragon an' sting like Bee-King, I do! And when I'm done beatin' whichever one o' you is brave enough ta face me I feel I'll be needin' to take a shat and will be glad fer yer wee bit o' paper. Hope it's thick in the middle I do!" He ducks, capers, weaves and bobs about Numalar showing off his fancy footwork, trying to shake the sorcerer. But doesn't quite pull it off.

Intimidate v Numalar: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (5) + 8 = 13

Who (if anyone) is taking on the nearly three-foot tall spitfire?


Numalar Auritonius wrote:

Numalar looks around for a few moments, flabbergasted.

Numalar's eyebrows go up. This little fellow, a king? Impossible! But... how many men have refused to honor my title? Only drunkards and fools ever called me 'Prince.' No, I will honor his title and see if he honors mine.

Numalar doffs his hat and bows deeply, without irony.

Your Royal-Honey Majesty, it is indeed an honor to meet you. I am Prince Numalar Auritonius the Ninth, of Valdralee. I promise it is not our purpose to trouble you.

1d20 + 8 ⇒ (11) + 8 = 19

"You?! One or the Nine Princes?!" Bumtumbler clasps his hands behind his back and circles once around Numalar looking him up and down in obvious disapproval. "Tch, tch, tch. I mean look at yerself man. Ya look like a walking hand-me-doon sale at the village flee market. Where's all the gold, aye? Sorry freirned but I think you might be a bit moon-touched or...."

Whispered to everyone else in the party who's nearby (Numalar needs a perception DC 15 to overhear):
been replaced by a face-eater--strange tarry beasties with gaping maws dat feed on the faces of men and den steal their shape.

He looks suspiciously at Numalar.

Numalar Auritonius wrote:

But you mentioned libations. Let us see what my dear friend Gertrude has in that regard...

Numalar goes over to his mule Gertrude, and pulls out two large clay jugs.

Yes. I think some booze could not but help this situation. :D

All the pack animals seem to be magically colored to resemble Holstein cows. There's a splintery three-legged stool under one of the horses along side an old tin bucket. Gertrude is wearing a rusty old viking-style helm.

Numalar Auritonius wrote:

"By the way, is there any chance I can have my charter back?"

"This?" He says holding it up as if seeing for the first time. "It t'wer stolen fair and honorably! Is mine ta keep--daemonic possession being the law an' all. If ya wants it y'all 'ave ta challenge me fer it!" He shoves it back into his belt, pushes his hair back, unbuttons and rolls his sleeves. He balls up his little pink fists like a late 19th century boxer. "Right! Marquess of Gralton Rules den?"

knowledge (geography or local) DC 15:
Gralton a River Kingdom founded by aristocrats and other refugees from Galt's endless bloody revolution is notable for not having many rules regarding fighting.


Scarlet Scarab wrote:

"Well, I don't have any wine, but I do have this..." Scarlet rummages around her stuff and manages to pull out a beautiful glass table-top vase complete with blown-glass flowers.

"We were en route to the Moon Radish Patch, then we heard about little critters making a mess and ruining the crops. We'd love to take a look at it and learn all we can about them."

He takes the vase and peers through it at you comically distorting his face (if that's possible). He shoves it in his rucksack.

"What's ta know? Dey're wee. Dey're daft. Dey're scaly and if ya kick 'em in bawbles dey fall down."


Zokon Santyev wrote:
"Old bear cave, silver mine? I'd have a greater appreciation of your tale if you told me where these places are please?"

"Lemme see yer map there lad. I tell ya, the times we live in rangers canna even find a wee giant bear cave with both 'ands. Oh and lookie 'ere ya already 'ave the other place marked--dinna know t'was a silver mine aya? Why am I not surprised? Yer meetin' those wee daft scaly buggers dere."

Area map updated.


"Oh yeah, if it ain't you daft, big job gits, its dem wee, scaly, black, mine buggers. Gallivantin' all about not a care in the world for decent folk like us, aye? Traipsing down our pathways twixt the Ol' Bear Cave and the Ol' Road and Silver Mine and da Moon Radish Patch, leavin' yer unmark traps everywhere. Ohhh the shame of it all. It's not like in de ol' days I can tell ye. Oh no, back then we got some respect, goat's milk and biscuits and a bit o' salt and some libations. Dems were da days. But now pbbt. Nothin'. Well nothin' will come o' nothin' I tell ye."


Zokon Santyev wrote:

Zokon does not quite no what to do, he settles on fact finding

"Hello can we help you at all, or have you approached us just for the pleasure of our company"

"Whaddya mean approached ye? You're the ones dat comma callin' on us all unannounced! No doubt yer here for the wishin'. Everyone's about the wishin'. Well, ye shant have it! An dat's final I says!" And so he does, spinning on his heel to turn away from the camp suddenly engrossed in the branches of foliage before him.


His Royal-Honey Majesty brow furls in confusion. He looks around and then back over his shoulder as if unsure with whom Celyne is speaking. Behind him a squirrel (possibly the same one from earlier) shrugs.

He looks at Celyne the way a person might look at a floating brick. "'Jests?' an' ye wanna pay us back with a fine meal of soap?" He looks about at the rest of the party. "Is there a healer in the camp? I think she's 'ad a wee too mooch air."


"Alright, alright!" A little man who probably only comes up to Numalar's nose with a shock of shockingly red, red hair waves them off and strides purposefully into the clearing. He wears a fur vest over a thread-bare shirt that was probably last washed before the little man stole it from a clothesline, and a kilt that looks to be made of rabbit's fur and feet. His eyes are startlingly gold. "De 'ole effect's bean ruin'd already, so stop bein' daft! Where's dis 'ere soap aye?"

KNOWLEDGE ABOUT WEE MAD BEE-KINGS
Again, one roll, multiple tiers.

Knowledge (nature) DC 12:
The Bee-King is a fey creature known as a Leprechaun. As most fey they have a wide array of magical abilities. They are also resistant to weapons not made of cold iron.

Knowledge (nature) DC 17:
Leprechauns love and hoard gold. Legend says you need only follow their magical rainbow to find their hiding spot.

Knowledge (nature) DC 22:
A leprechaun's magic is particularly keen when it is used to make mortals look like fools.