But finally is my thought process wrong, my goal eventually will be charging into a fight on surprise rounds using sandals of quick reaction, superior reflexes to use swift action to do whatever is needed, and then standard for spell strike. Now 1st round in position again because of initiative full round attack with 15 to 20 crit range, and at lvl 9 i will be running a plus 10 on confirming criticals. Shortly after that I reach prerequisite for maximize spell...
I think before you answer any of those you need to figure out what is it that you want to do.
Tank is a bad word. I've all but expunged it from my vocabulary where pathfinder is concerned.
Think of what you want to do as an actual verb.
Do you want to control the fight? Or do you want to end it?
If you want to end it then you're on the right track. You have the defenses to weather the backlash from your first couple of rounds and the potential damage to drop opponents left and right. Endurance may be an issue but your goal means the rest of the group blows fewer resources anyway so it all evens out. You may want to actually wait until after buffers and full casters have gone before you rush in and destroy but that is at your discretion.
If you want to control it you may want to rethink how you work. Damage prevention to your group (what most people consider the traditional tanking role) can be accomplished by your class without having to enter melee at all. With spells like Glitterdust and Major Image on your list control is very much a thing that you can do. While feasible reach weapons aren't in your repertoire you do ahve access to enlarge person which lets you increase your reach reasonably well enough to increase personal control of territory. With added mobility and a very high initiative modifier being able to control the pace of the fight so your dwarven barbarian friend does the majority of the getting hit part makes you very much a kind of tank if that's what you prefer...
I realized early on that Pathfinder doesn't use a clear rule system to define the roles. This is fine, because my character in truth doesn't really fit one. If anything he is closer to a Hybrid of all roles. I have wand of cure light wounds like most, but because of Spell combat I have had situations where i played a healer and still swung.
I am not the best at any one thing, and my build only gets stronger in 1st few rounds of combat down the road, but the thing I am not quite understanding. If I have so much defense what am i doing wrong? Even the DM doesnt think im a tank.