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Goth Guru's page

6,427 posts (6,459 including aliases). No reviews. No lists. 2 wishlists. 3 aliases.


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If you actually read the Narnia books you would have npcs reading bibles, trying to predict the future, and figuring out which biblical character everyone is.

Pizza Lord wrote:

DM: "Alright everyone. This game setting moves away from all the tropes of dystopian futures. Why do they always have to be dystopian?"

It's a utopian future. Everything's worked out and... probably will keep doing so for the foreseeable future. There's a lot of harp music, gentle breezes, and flowing white garments. Fields of flowers, indeed.

No... there's no hidden danger. There are no subterranean, cannibalistic degenerate mutants. Humanity's worked it all out.

There is also no creativity. Everyone is bored and cannot entertain themselves. Certain brave souls venture into the past to find lost ideas, like the Cleaves or Ponyfinder. If you are a time traveler, I'll post you the links.:)

A game world where characters who try to leave the island automatically turn into mindless undead. There is only one dungeon and that's a tower you have to complete to get to heaven or something. Any railroaded thing like that is just a mess.

83. Bag of Smoke Pellets
When a pellet is thrown at the ground, floor, or whatever, they emit a a flash and puff of smoke. There are 50 inside when found, and will refill only if discarded and found by someone else. In any case, they give +4 to surprise, initiative, hiding, of other actions that involve appearing or disappearing. The pellets are an alchemicle item and can be duplicated as such.

I have to find the ponyfinder thread.

I think the awakened griffons were created by Discord. Also, the awakened Owlbears, Minotaurs, and Chimera. Instead of joining him in the war against the gods of order alliance, they went their separate ways. Discord tried turning the creatures loved ones back into stoneware figurines and offering to change them back for obedience, but one griffon tried to banish him with a ritual. They slayed themselves and Discord was shocked. He left his creations alone and turned to demons and monsters as allies.

This is too dark for the show, but it should work for the game.

Klondike, mountains of madness expansion.

FOE, Forge of Empires. I would like to summon a horror into one of the cities that keep attacking me unprovoked.

112. A dungeon covered with warning signs. After the characters bash down the nailed shut doors they step through to find, they stepped out of the simulation. The beta testing has had some weird side effects. The testers have forgotten who they were.

Granted. You never looked up "that".

I wish the haters who keep crashing my internet provider with their ransomware would instead devote their lives to silly online chats like this.


Last night I had a crazy dream
About a chick in a black bikini
Oh, she looked so good
She couldn't be real
She must be a magic genie
But then she disappeared around the corner
All I saw were three doors
And the top of her bikini
I made it through the first door
There was a party going on
I asked about the chick
But what they said was freaky
Don't ya jes' love it
Don't you jes' love it
Don't ya jes' love it
I found the bottom half
Behind the second door
Which took me to Africa I presume
This really far out cat
Was screaming half crazy
"Bomp boom a loo bom a long bam boo"
I said, hey man
Cut that jive
And tell me where the chick went
But he looked at me
As pleased as could be
And said these words
But I wonder what he meant
Don't ya jes' love it
Don't you jes' love it
Don't ya jes' love it
Aaaah, don't ya jes' love it
Mmm-hum, don't ya jes' love it
Don't ya love it, don't ya love it
Oh yeah, don't ya love it
Don't ya jes' love it now
I opened the third door and there she was
And she whispered so sexy, hello-ooh
I tried to do the same
And impress her with my style
But why I said this
I'll never know
Don't ya jes' love it
Don't you jes' love it
Don't ya jes' love it
Don't ya know I'll
Don't ya jes' love it
Don't you jes' love it
Don't ya jes' love it
Don't ya jes' love it
Don't you jes' love it
Don't ya jes' love it

1 person marked this as a favorite.

The Riddler, converted to Pathfinder

(Casts a silence spell)

The next poster could also use some magic.

Back in my day, games that went nowhere after a certain level, like Wizardry, were considered 'fun'. Now I get excited when someone even knows what Wizardry is!

Also, "Murphy's ghost" wasn't sneered at because it was "4th wall". If you couldn't beat it, you tried again!

The skinwalker from Haven. Actually any unique nasty from a show your friends never watched.

Crazy Cat Lady award
Use a bag of tricks up in combat, for the day.

The Pillsbury doughboy had the operation.

The next poster had their junk recycled.

Eryx_UK wrote:
For some time now I've been pondering re-writing and overhauling the old Dragonlance setting to be a more traditional but romanticised fantasy setting. It won't bare too much resemblance to the old setting but I think I could make it more interesting.

If you replace kender with Hobbits, then OK.

I'm thinking of creating "whiner's bonuses" tailored to the core classes. At first level fighters get +1 to hit and damage while wizards get +1 to AC. the bonuses go up by levels(possibly every 3 levels). Rogues get a 4 point bonus to their class skills, disarming traps, hiding, ect. Clerics and druids get a deity specific blessing continuously active. This then becomes a problem for paladins. Do they choose one or the other?

Good idea for a forum game topic. Why is that npc here?

You could have drawbacks specific to each specialization. For example, +1 to the specialized weapon to hit and damage, but -1 to all other weapons.

You could make an exotic weapon common for them but all other common weapons exotic for them.

A new monster subtype, mutant. Only fleshy creatures can be mutant, but creatures with magic powers cannot. A giant human with no elemental affinities would be a mutant. A unicorn, is not. Most dire animals are mutant.

GM Rednal wrote:

The problem isn't DM NPCs, it's DM PCs - that is, characters who act like full members of the party, get involved in making decisions, want a big share of loot, and generally act as a player that just happens to also be the GM. That's... difficult to do right at the best of times, and usually best avoided.

NPCs with the party, on the other hand, are easy enough. Maybe they're just bad at fighting so they run and hide when it happens, or they have the job of keeping the escape route clear and so don't get involved outside of that. There's plenty of ways to ensure they don't outshine the party. ^^ Just gotta be a little creative.

I have never had that problem. I just roleplay them as if they were people. They contribute to the adventures and combat, and share accordingly. In every group, there are roles that no one else wants to play. Sometimes it's the healer, or the trap expert. Having that big a hole in the party can lead to a TPK, and no fun.

A mutant animal is a subset of magical beasts. Dire and giant animals are mutants. At some point you will have to make lists. Owlbear, mutant. Unicorn, not mutant. Chimera, not sure. Ettins and Lamias might choose to be favorably disposed to Atomic druids.

I think the PC atomic druid should be required to take one mutation for their base form. Even if it's cheating like a giant kobold. An M sized kobold, wouldn't really pass for a lizardman.

188: Don't try to make an atomic bomb. If the GM wants them, they will be provided.

If you are a fan of Star Trek, you have noticed that magic is always just beyond the reach of science. The cat lady was from a realm of pure thought, while the devil was hidden in the center of the galaxy till they put a massive black hole there.

Basicly, I agree that atoms exist, but some atoms are composed of sub sub atomic particles of only one alignment or charge.

I'm thinking of putting that water cube in a dungeon, as well as a staff of negation. Can you say epic water bomb? A bottle of too much water (which is always set to geiser) puts out water till pressure equalizes. It's basically a tiny gate to a very deep part of an infinite ocean.

Gisher wrote:

5. Throat Chakra (DC 25): Speech and hearing are nothing more than vibrations, and the throat chakra thrums with the occult vibrations that govern existence. Here the urges and emotions of the lower chakras give way to more refined, cerebral vistas, making the throat chakra the bridge between feeling and thinking.

By awakening the throat chakra, the initiate can tap into the primordial mystical language underlying all things—the raw tongue of the multiverse that gives motion to atoms, keeps planets rotating in infinite space, and orders the coruscations of the stars.

Robert Mitra taught me that the throat chakra relates to actual space and time. I can speed up traffic and lines by opening my throat chakra. This might be saying the same thing a different way, like having the schools of magic being a different form of quantum mechanics.

I believe that atoms are made up of sub atomic particles that are energy, and that they in turn are made up of actual thought and emotions. They are waves crystallized by their present relationships to other waves. The 3 mystical elements are emotion, thought, and divine inspiration.

This is like how orientals have 5 elements, and planer travel works differently for them. A wizard might have difficulty IDing a thought forms elemental because it would look like what their concept of the idea was.

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Torbyne wrote:

The material plane operates according to physics when under no external forces. Some elements are altered to fit with the game system as this is not meant to directly model the real world but we have evidence all over the place that it is based off that, including Earth being a thing and the advanced, science only, Androffan civilization attaining spaceflight by purely science based approaches. In setting the natural order imposed by physics is routinely disrupted by the manipulation of external forces, alternate planes of existence that do not follow the laws of the material plane intersecting certain points, extraplanar creatures that can be thought of manifest belief or concepts being able to take physical forms and interact on the Prime Material and all of those pesky magic users that can locally interupt fundamental laws of physics.

So Stars are massive burning furnaces of nuclear fussion... that also contain gateways to the plane of positive energy in their hearts and are the source of all souls in existance. life begins when, through natural or artificial means, a shell is created that is capable of containing a soul, the shell calls out to a soul and one transits and probably FTL speeds from the nearest star to the shell and life begins. I assume the massive stream of pure positive energy at the star's heart is enough to shield the soul from the mind numbing amount of fire and radiation it is exposed to on transit.

That's pretty good for this world. I have trouble remembering my past lives because my soul was massively degaussed by passing through the sun.

How about exploding dead. You turn any remains into bombs.

He's pigment blessed.

Were wolves are so free and powerful.

The next poster is also thinking of creating a sick PC.

I'm hiding this topic, because it's insensitive to those who are allergic to tobacco smoke and steam. Don't Direct Message me.

If you have seen the movie Cube, you could have the wish room at the center of the complex.

The campaign died from loss of players. Everybody moved or got jobs that conflicted with times we could play at game stores.

I'm going to restart the game where I live.

Granted, here's an everfull cup of scalding coffee. Enjoy 2D4 damage with every sip.

I wish for "Magical Tea Time" to become a ponyfinder module so I can rub a trolls face in it.:)

Kirth Gersen wrote:
Alicorn, you don't actually seem to understand the martial-caster disparity that's built into the game rules. For starters, damage dice have essentially nothing to do with it. Then again, your posts indicate that you tend to prefer to play Magical Tea Party, where DM fiat rather than class features determine narrative power, so in your games it probably isn't much of a thing.

That's because a lot of gamers do not believe in it. It does not take into account that wizards and sorcerers are very vulnerable. If they wear armor, they have spell failure. Their protective spells have to be cast to be of any use, and they never know when combat is about to happen. They get the weakest hit dice. Anyone who makes a wizard as a frontline combatant is trying to get their character killed so their friends will stop asking them to play.

And Magical Tea Party sounds like a Ponyfinder module. I don't know what your point was by that comment, but you should better use your time by creating that module and bringing it to conventions. Both Pathfinder and MLP conventions.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

So, the rechargable quality costs a lot, but the one user only drawback negates that cost?

Now I'm thinking of a flat 10,000 GP cost of a coin slot in a wand. When half the cost of a charge is put into the slot, that charge is restored. Note that the slot must be built in when originally crafted. The coins are consumed, but this might balance the economy regarding the treasure coming out of dungeons and extra planer adventures.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Both. It has the added horror element that a PC implanted as a child might not realize what they are at first.

As a monster, the LE ones may be running a corrupt empire or city state and consorting with Lamias.

The PC might be a gunslinger in a goblin body, looking to trade up. To transfer, they need a surgeon and some doses of sleep poison.

The biology of it is that one developed Brain Welk suppresses the growth of all other Brain Welks, cancers, and other diseases. A transfusion may(fort save) cause the recipient to have a new welk grow in them over a few weeks or somesuch. An adult Brain Welk can survive dormant in their shell for over a year.

The cultists usually include at least one surgeon, for obvious reasons.

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Offline, I have been working on a topic containing homebrew spells.

I have also been working on the monster, Brain Welk, which is a symbiotic/parasite that has all mental stats, and no physical stats except for its shell. The first ones from the dark tapestry were lawful evil and view their hosts as dumb animals. They are very tech smart and the things they make their hosts build seem magical. Their hosts children tend to be smarter than previous generations. Some later generation Welks have become free thinkers who share control of the host with them, have any possible alignment, and some even learn vancian magic.

181. Craftsman, commoner, Lich, unless they multiclass as a spellcaster.

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Rituals, both linked above and the homebrew topic I have been contributing to, state that being a spellcaster are not required.

You have 2 conflicting rules so yes, the GM must make the choice. In 3.5 I had an NPC attach the hand of vecna. He used the power that kills, and Vecna rewarded him by making the 10th level ninja a litch.

Not only are GMs free to allow it in home games, PFS developers are free to create non caster liches and the altered ritual that creates them.

I always sleep on my side so my snoring doesn't wake me up.
Mines allergy based, so for once I'm sort of lucky.

You can call yourself the GH, even if that means Game Hamster, Because you are the GM, DM, or anything else you want to call yourself!

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Granted. I've added a planet made of peas to the solar system.

I wish for even more puns!:)

TheAlicornSage wrote:


D20 never had true vancian, but arcanist is the closest. Not sure about 5e as I don't know it.

Captain America
An ability score of 20 is barely supernatural, like 110% of normal human maximum. Level 20 is like 400% of normal human maximum.

Why have classes? These are my biggest complaint about d20. I really don't like classes. The sole purpose of a class is to limit players for the sake of "balance" and "niche protection," but they are an excellent example of how seeking balance stifles certain types of creativity.

If you want freedom in character creation, get rid of classes.

The only other benefit I've ever actually heard for classes was that they provided inspiration and made creation of npcs faster, both of which can be done with premade "kits" of choices in a classless system with equal ability and none of the drawbacks.

Cap's base is 20. Then he took levels in vigilante and whatever else.

So you want to put a cap on number of classes? You can even say core only. I don't agree. I would like each book that adds classes to have new monster and treasure item encounter tables included.

I think Warcraft Dryads are not on such a short leash to their trees.

Mutants from the mana wastes. Winged elves, 2 headed Half Orcs, ect. A lot of mutants are unique individuals so this is the place.

You come to shore, DaDum, Dadum, Dadum, Dadum...

So pure fighters should not have vancian magic but can have non vancian magic including incantations or magical mutations. Also rituals that give them combat powers.

The super soldier serum gave Captain America a 20 dex and later exposure to super villain powers gave him super strength. Possibly 20 or more.

SmiloDan wrote:
Purple Overkill wrote:
Cyrad wrote:
Purple Overkill wrote:
2) More class or class-combo oriented feats, possible game-style defining combos. (Let´s face it, the whole Magus could have been a feat chain, for example)
As someone who has played several magi as well as other gish classes, I completely disagree with you.

Reread my point number one. While I think that the game has a place for a "Knight Roland", "Conan" or "Garrett the Thief", those are also concepts that cannot or should not progress beyond a certain point.

I don´t say "Everybody has to be a Wizard", but I disagree with martial classes being able to stay pure martial in the long run, as that makes no sense with that system (and setting).

So, yes, you can do the pure function with feats. TWF as prerequisite for Spell Combat, as prerequisites for Spellstrike, and so on.

Maybe instead of making everyone a magic-user, there could be martial "special effects" that are similar to spells, but mundane, if cinematic, in origin. Similar to the Combat Maneuvers the 5th Edition Battlemaster fighters get, or the Book of the Nine Swords stuff. Maybe every martial gets ki, but monks get twice as much? Maybe they get some "rule-breaking" abilities, like being able to make a full attack as a swift action once per hour? Maybe they can get some free skill unlocks, like being able to jump through the air and throwing two daggers at once or bouncing up a perfectly smooth wall at full speed or just glaring at a lock and making it pop open?

The Fonzerelli touch would be easier to accept.

Just tapping on the door and having it spring open.

I remember now. The umbrella creature is a discarded umbrella that animated for whatever reason. An undead android or a spontaneously animated mannequin would be so cool.

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