Elder Elemental Eye's page

How do you define politics?

Does utter universal annihilation count as a platform?

I channel positive energy to erase this thread.

You would do that. Worship me.

Join a cult. You know you wanna.

I set the game board on fire.

It's not a thread until it's been obliterated into nothingness!

Part of me weeps for the inability of our forces to turn their destruction on the forces of good and life, but at the same time any destruction is fun destruction.

Play on, fools!

If you really want a new avatar, just do what I do and create another alias. Mwahahaha!

Come down to the Temple for some CRAZY savings. We're practically giving away these colour-coded cloaks!

His power will consume all, your idiotic ramblings will amount to nothing.

4 out of 5 Evil Archomentals agree.

I am expressing what you mortals might regard as detached amusement. These pathetic constructs serve their purpose as tools of my campaign of freedom. My forces are legion.

As for the name of the Temple, I'm thinking something visceral and primal. Something that appeals to base human instincts. What's the word I'm looking for...you know, like when something is a necessary component part of something?

Stay back, and do not try to swarm me, ye accursed trolls, or I shall smite thee with my vastly superior intelligence!

No, you idiot, you need to use FIRE! ;)

I can pretty much guarantee that. Let me give Imix a nudge.

Gentlemen! Behold!

Time Travel! My three month old alias was created for a very specific purpose. To troll these messageboards...in the future!

Your logic will not avail you when the master escapes.

We are not your opponents. You cannot comprehend our power and we have no face. Don't kick over the anthill and you won't get swarmed.

We encourage grandiose designs and in-fighting. We may be assimilated, but in the end it will not matter.

We are currently taking suggestions on where to build our temple - please reference the OP as to our requests.

I would also like to table a motion to introduce a third axis to the alignment grid: Gygaxism.

We welcome you. Please take your pick of coloured robes.

Hey, I am the only cult leader allowed to use that avatar! I'm guessing you wish to merge your cult with ours? ;)

Excellent. My thread lives...again!

Now this is the kind of chaos I can get behind.

My only suggestion is: more nihilism, less existentialism.

When did our cults become democratic?

15. Zombies

16. Elder's Elemental Eye Cult

We prefer "Cult of the Elder Elemental Eye".

Elder Elemental Eye wrote:

I am flattered and outraged at the lack of recognition of my cult.

Who are you again?

If you don't know already, then you don't get to know.

you have a cult? what does it do?

What don't we do?

Stockpile treasure to use for nefarious purposes.

Hire low-level NPCs to guard our temples.

Put crazy people in charge of divisive schisms.

Use neat and tidy memorandums to communicate in house.

Have no clearly defined leadership aside from myself.

Recruit just about anyone wearing a colored robe.

Refuse to relocate.

Advertise.

Our plan has no chance of backfiring.

I am flattered and outraged at the lack of recognition of my cult.

Hmm. I must subvert this new social group to my own nefarious purposes.

I wholly endorse this group, and under my watchful gaze you shall prosper and eventually my plans will be complete!

Iggwilv

Grazz't
Splynncryth
The Bear Guy in Gamma World
Strahd
The Theocrat of Pan Tang
Mike Tyson
Darth Vader's Primary Clone
the K'zinti
Rasputin the Mad Monk's Vampire

I am none of those people. Although I may be related to one.

I'll add:
- Kefka (FF6)
- Acererak
- Tiamat
- Luca Blight (Suikoden II)
- Jon Irenicus (BGII)
- Batlin of Britain (Ultima VII/SI)
- Strahd
- King Mendegast XXVI (shout-out to my homebrew)
- Cyric

ME! But who am I you ask? Everyone will give you a different answer.

Elder Elemental Eye wrote:

What does it matter, anyway? They're all getting fed to Zuggytmoy.

Don’t tell them that! Bah! I can’t work with you people!

It's fine, it's just a double-fake anyway. We actually feed them to Lolth...or do we?

Elder Elemental Eye wrote:

Yes. Orange is one of the preferred colours in our little "group".

Not very good at the charismatic cult founder thing are you? Family. You want to make it sound warm and inviting. Group is too impersonal.

What does it matter, anyway? They're all getting fed to Zuggytmoy.

The only way to make your voice heard is to vote. Vote early. Vote often. Wear orange.

Yes. Orange is one of the preferred colours in our little "group".

Haha! My reign of terror continues unabated.

Elder Elemental Eye wrote:

Jason Beardsley wrote:

Now, we're gonna need parchment, an empty ink vial, and a quill. Make sure you fill the vial with your blood, you're not going to miss 8 ounces. I'll take care of the verbal component, while you draw up the summoning circle. I've got rope or chalk dust, whichever you prefer, if you don't have any.

Do we need something to entice Sebastian into our service? Perhaps we should present a Bella Sara Booster Pack?

We should secure more than one, just in case.

I shall use my connections with the alter-ego of a certain Mr. Bulmahn to obtain them for us.

Now, we're gonna need parchment, an empty ink vial, and a quill. Make sure you fill the vial with your blood, you're not going to miss 8 ounces. I'll take care of the verbal component, while you draw up the summoning circle. I've got rope or chalk dust, whichever you prefer, if you don't have any.

Do we need something to entice Sebastian into our service? Perhaps we should present a Bella Sara Booster Pack?

KnightErrantJR wrote:

Jason Beardsley wrote:

[threadjack]LOL, I can't help but think WWSS (What would Sebastian say).. [/threadjack]

Okay, I'll draw the summoning circle if you start chanting his name backwards . . . now all we have to do is find someone willing to sign a contract in blood and we should be able to get him here easily.

Hmm.. where are those cultists..

Cultists needed? We are at your service.

You all know a vote for Sebastian is actually a vote for me, right?

And of course, a vote for me means...

Are members required to chant and speak in weird languages? How about dietary requirements and/or prohibitions, are there any?

How about wives? We get more than one?

Members are free to speak and worship in whatever way they please. Freedom is our motto and our purpose. Along the same lines, diets are not mandated. We do not supply wives, but if you can attract multiple people to such a prospect, we do not discourage it - so long as they support your place with us, or can be kept ignorant until our objectives are complete.

~raises my hand~ I am Neutral Good. Can I still join?

Sure, you can still join, just don't ask too many questions.

If you were Lawful, that would be a problem.

I uh thought we were gonna build the alter. We already have one?!?!?

We have a few. We consider them relics, so no mere mortal could build one - the art of their construction has been lost to the ages.

But if you want to try, nobodies stopping you. You can be the first one to look longingly into it.

Elder Elemental Eye wrote:

Okay, come on, it's been a while, I think someone can spill the beans by now and call me on my cruel joke.

I think Kirth had it, so I'll let him go first if he wants.

~shhhhh~ Kirth be quite don't say a thing.

We have an altar that can take care of that reticence.

All we need is a small bell, a few candles...

Okay, come on, it's been a while, I think someone can spill the beans by now and call me on my cruel joke.

I think Kirth had it, so I'll let him go first if he wants.

Anyone here an engineer? We need some serious work on our Temple and Moathouse. Those things were trashed the last time our group was, uh, ousted from the area.

Fine, we will add the mighty Potato as a Fifth Element.

And I am the Elder Elemental Eye, the mighty Potato of Entropy!

I would love to apply for a position! I am quite wonderful looking and should help with recruitment possibilities. Something along the lines of 'Air' is what I am thinking, with the way the wind tickles my jibbly-bits with my kilt on.

I am hard working, a real people person, and very self-motivated. People tend to go the extra mile for me with just a flash of a smile, making me a natural leader. I can fake a gentle demeanor very well but I am unmistakable evil. Beautiful but evil.
So are there any openings?

Hmm. You don't have any debilitating facial scarring, mayhaps?

Because that would certainly help awareness and give us the "look" we want.

secretturchinman wrote:

I wanna join! Whats my Element?

You can the be the Earl of Sammich! A delectible blend of the Four Elements of Bread, Meat, Lettuce, and Mustard!

Bread = Earth

Lettuce = Water
Meat = Fire
Mustard = Air

Thus was the sandwich claimed for our purposes. So shall it be consumed on the holy days of our calendar. Let the assembling of the sandwich components be a symbol of the unity of the elements in service to our patron, who is imprisoned.

I've got a moathouse I can sell you. It's a fixer-upper, and the basement's full of ghouls... but you should hear the frogs sing at night! And it's just outside of town: perfect for any fledgeling cult.

This sounds appealing. As long as the townsfolk don't interfere with our group, we can foresee setting up in such a location.

Now, we still need people to live in the town nearby for us, to "engage" the locals in our goals.

I believe Kirth is holding onto the win for now.

Kassil wrote:

Further queries should be directed to my profile, first, which contains most pertinent data…

(laughing) Are you sure you are not 13?

It does not matter, such a powerful being in our service means we are INVINCIBLE!

Now that we have each of our servants, we can look for a place for you to live nearby. Our group calls these specially built domeciles "nodes", as they focus your elemental energy and allow us to do great things.

Um does that then leave Water? What would water get me?

Better hope you can work underwater. We have lost a fair number of members trying to construct certain portions of our Temple.

In addition, you get a nice piece of blue crystal to hang from the symbol you will wear as a member of our cult.

Elder Elemental Eye wrote:

Nicholas Commando wrote:

Yippee! Count me in, so long as we don't have to wear anything under our robes! I'm (free as the) air!

Ah, good. Now we have a fire member and an air member.

Water and earth are still accepting members!

I call Earth. Of course, I'm a nonhuman, being draconic.

I look forward to the delivery of self-propelled field rations to my lair.

Dragons are especially welcome amongst our group. May I ask what colour of dragon you are? You are not bound to respond, given current equal opportunity legislation. However, I am allowed to ask you what your alignment is.

So, what's your alignment?

Yippee! Count me in, so long as we don't have to wear anything under our robes! I'm (free as the) air!

Ah, good. Now we have a fire member and an air member.

Water and earth are still accepting members!