One of the important things to do is make it part of your routine. I've been playing on and off with a group for almost 15 years. We play every other Friday night. When i got married, my wife and I discussed this and once she realized how important it was to me she was accepting of the once every 2 weeks game, though she still teases me saying that I'm abandoning her.
Having the schedule in place makes it a lot easier, that way everyone (and thier families) know what is planned and when. I agree with the poster that said you should give your wife some extra me time. Perhaps schedule that every couple weeks she is able to get away with friends for an afternoon and you'll take care of the kids without her having to worry about anything. Having something to look forward to helps keep things from getting overwhelming.