Mesmalatu

Demi-Lich H. Ross Perot's page

126 posts. Alias of Ambrosia Slaad.


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Freehold DM wrote:
lisamarlene wrote:
I'm convinced the prospect of Tipper as First Lady was the real reason Gore lost his bid for the Presidency.

entirely possible.

She was extremely unpopular in some circles.

Shield spell vs Fritzy's Minute Meteorbikes:
While the Gore campaign was never a white-hot ball of excitement, never underestimate 1) Gore's incredibly stupid decision to publicly distance himself from the successes of Clinton's Presidency, and b) the "Joementum" 18-ton sh*tty boat anchor that is Joe Lieberman as a human being running mate.
.

(I should retire this alias.)


Vanykrye wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
Orthos wrote:
I just bought and installed some shoe sole inserts. The effect was almost immediate. Need to be better about keeping them up to date and in good condition.
It is of paramount importance to tend to your immortal sole.
What does fish have to do with this?

A nice, tender, delicately-seasoned filet of soul is delicious. Especially when it's beer-battered and served with fresh hot chips.


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Get all your caroling and singing and devil's dancing and ankle exposing in now you dang youngster's, 'cause Groetus is coming back for another pass at us next November.


If the Eoxian necrodocs reclaim (under contract) and reanimate your fallen comrade's body, who's to say that body will even house your comrade's soul?

Necrodoc: "Yeah, you see, your buddy Mr. Jenkins should have read his Silver Plan contract closer. Otherwise, he would have known that a Platinum Member has priority access to available bodies; one has exercised this option and has already been resleeved into the Jenkins necromeatware. Not to worry though, Mr. Jenkins' mindsoul is in the queue and should only experience a short 36-38 month wait for a body."


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♫♪ "Come, Mr. Necro-mon, animate me comp-an-yon
(Daylight come and me wan' some new bones)..."
♫♪


Bob Gore is a horrifying parody character you get when you brundlefly Norm Macdonald and Darrell Hammond together in a telepod.


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Harry 'Blacksocks' MacGrognard wrote:
Alla you old coots stop yer yellin'! I'm tryna watch Judge Judy!

{murmurs in sleep about "whippersnappers"}


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A Yesterday is never late, nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.


Rarely is the question asked: Is our FaWtLies learning?


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IN THE GRIM DARKNESS OF THE IMMEDIATE FUTURE THERE IS ONLY THE NEXT ELECTION


I served with Henghist Khan. I knew Henghist Khan. Henghist Khan was a friend of mine. Slaadator, you're no Henghist Khan.


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captain yesterday wrote:
Tammy's a bad apple.

Tammy's also a real peach. {waggles non-existent eyebrows}

Freehold DM wrote:
thejeff wrote:
I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:
Sharoth wrote:

Edit - I too am not completely trusting of law enforcement or the government. (Long story.) I respect most officers, but I do know there are more than a few bad apples in the bunch.

As none other than Dr. Philip Zimbardo said after the Abu Ghraib disgrace broke out, it's not "bad apples," it's the barrel itself that's making the apples bad.

Remember that the original saying is that "a few bad apples spoil the whole barrel".

The whole point is that corruption spreads, not that it's fine because there are just a few bad apples.

nominally,I would agree with you, but I would argue here that the saying has taken on the latter meaning nowadays.

Perhaps the saying has been drifted in meaning amongst folk nowadays, but that means those folk are wrong. They are the same folk who felt it was necessary to drift the meaning of words like decimate, to confuse words like accurate with precise, and to invent words like "pro-active." Wrong, wrong, wrong!

And get off my mausoleum lawn, you whipper-snapper!


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Lord Fyre wrote:
I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:
If I pushed Ser Humpty Dumpty, Paladin, off his wall, then gathered up his remains and cooked them, would that get me deviled eggs?
It would still taste heavenly.

Feel the Béarnaise 2016!


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captain yesterday wrote:

Two words.

Lichable Viagra.

With four more words.

For men, or women.

{waggles nonexistent eyebrows} Is that a phylactery in your pocket...


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Cthulhudrew wrote:
thecursor wrote:
Calling it right now: Eox will be Starfinder's "big villain"
Eox shall always win, because their ships need not waste valuable space and resources on such frivolities as "life support" and "crew supplies." :p

We can no longer sit back and allow the intergalactic Jyotiist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious negative energy.


Drainage! Drainage, GV, you boy. Drained dry. I'm so sorry. Here, if you have a pie chart, and I have a pie chart, and I have a straw. There it is, that's a straw, you see? Watch it. Now, my straw reaches acroooooooss the room and starts to drink your pie chart. I... drink... your... pie chart!

{slurps} I drink it up!


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Never ever play Dance Dance Revolution with Undead Comrade Khrushchev. Especially never play for money.


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Mr. Shark, I served with Charts. I knew Charts. Charts was a friend of mine. Mr. Shark, you're no Charts.

(╯°□°)╯ ︵ ┻━┻


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I blame Cosmo for reminding me I need to steal Dick Clark's mummified hand of immortality from Matthew Broderick.


{makes fervent, bloviating campaign promises about the need to eradicate the epidemic of corn smut from the Americas...

...while secretly harboring severe addiction to delicious corn smut himself}


{snores}


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captain yesterday wrote:

I set my arm on fire, once.

On my 21st birthday.

WWT(ammy)D?


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(Bad Lip Reading:) First Republican Debate Highlights: 2015 "Well I have a pigeon, Lucas Don Velour!"


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SCP-682 wrote:
CarusoBot wrote:
...before watching Trump give a speech.
... hey, who the hell let him out of containment and not me?

That douchebag Walter Peck from the EPA.

{glides into a cardboard box, gets stuck} Damnit Maru, you make this look so easy.


{struggles to open locked door} Guys, can I get a hand? It's hard to grip the door handle with my blinged out teeth.

Awww, crap. It's raining all over my charts and graphs.


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Freehold DM wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:

Mount FAWTLympus perhaps :-)

Has a view, guaranteed not to sink, debauchery included :-)

I'd buy that for a dollar.

Say, what currency do we use?

MoorBucks, backed by BttH safely secured by the FaWTL Reserve at Fort Knockers.


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Mitt and Al strike me as the kids who love to play android and Vulcan PCs, except Mitt is eerily too good at it and never breaks character.


A, E, I, O, U, el burro sabe mas que tu!


Stupid sexy Flanders.


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meatrace wrote:
Demiliches do it in the [REDACTED]!

{waggles illusionary eyebrows} Hey, how you doin'? [/Joey]


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Celestial Healer wrote:
Set wrote:
[succubus tangent][/succubus tangent]
What's more, if a popular tale were to arise of such an exploit, that would lead to the "It wasn't me! It was a succubus!" line of defense for unfaithful spouses.

Constant fodder for The Maury PovLich Show


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The US Capitol Building in Washington DC is so radioactive, due to the high uranium content in its granite walls, it could never be licensed as a nuclear power reactor site.


Drejk wrote:
Demi-Lich H. Ross Perot wrote:
Nicos wrote:
Well, there is thi flying skull with ruby eyes that tends to get mad at me in certain off topic threads, albeit in political threads i almost always agree with his opinions.
I must be getting senile(r), because I don't remember you at all. ;)
Maybe he means some other flying skull with ruby eyes getting mad at him in certain off-topic threads?

That's unpossible, I'm an iconoclast! Look, I have a stack of charts and graphs to prove it... {rummages for +5 Presentation of Boredom}

Spoiler:
Yeah, I knew he didn't mean me.

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Nicos wrote:
Well, there is thi flying skull with ruby eyes that tends to get mad at me in certain off topic threads, albeit in political threads i almost always agree with his opinions.

I must be getting senile(r), because I don't remember you at all. ;)


Charles Scholz is banned for losing an "I Got Your Nose" game with Voldemort.


Righty Tighty


{floats in, starts burping the alphabet}


{snores in the corner}


{makes note to research a spell that duplicates Randy Newman singing "Sound of Silence"}


I'm still waiting for my hip transplant! {shakes mage hand}


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Freehold DM wrote:
Moorluck wrote:
...although if left to me there wouldn't be a tomorrow.
So you are going to destroy all of time and space because you're mad at one dude? Isn't that a bit unfair?

Moorluck is currently in round 3 of the James Bond Villain SupaStah! contest. Things are looking good after he had two other contestants "eliminated" yesterday, and another judge imprisoned in the Phantom Zone on Monday.


Kavren Stark is banned for having the salmon mousse.


Bluebell Golden Nostrils is banned for a complete lack of charts and graphs.


Vic Wertz wrote:
I voted for Miss Piggy, because she's secretly Yoda.

That was a particularly disturbing episode of The Maury Povich Show.

...

As a renowned proponent of charts and graphs, I heartily approve of this newfangled watchamagadget.


FuelDrop is banned for misspelling redonkulous.


Joe Biden wrote:
I won a game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey once.

No, you're mis-remembering. We were doing shots of tequila and hits of LSD while watching My Little Lawyer: Sebastian is Magic.


That's fine; let them come. I currently control the largest stockpile of Santo Gold in the world. My wrestler ninja army is fully-trained and ready.

I ain't scairt.

Mummy Woodrow Wilson and Frankenstein FDR... come at me bros!


Cpt_kirstov wrote:
SCSi wrote:

Dear Paizo's Servers,

Although at times we take you for granted. Our endless flame-wars and hammering the F5 key with wanton disregard to your feelings; you may feel quite used and neglected. This letter is to say we really do appreciate you and hope you get better soon.

Love,

Your ungrateful fans.

Lol stupid people who don't know how to drive on paizo's street *shakes fist* whippersnappers, always hitting telephone poles, they are!

Hey, that telephone pole pulled right out in front of us! It had no business driving on the sidewalk. That mailbox did the same a few blocks back, but we managed to swerve around it in time.

And anyway, Stockdale was driving!


Tensor wrote:
Comrade Anklebiter wrote:
"But here's my advice to the rest of you: Take dead aim on the rich boys. Get them in the crosshairs and TAKE THEM DOWN. Just remember: they can buy everything, but they can't buy backbone. Don't let them forget it."

But wouldn't the end result of this process turn you into a rich boy?

It's like Highlander: there can be only one.


{knocks on door with forehead} Can I come in? I was almost President. I can prove it... look at my charts and graphs...

Guys?

Ah come on, I saw you hide behind the sofa and turn the lights off. I know you're in there.

...

Rats. This is Stockdale's fault. {sits on front porch and sulks}

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