Clinton Boomer's page

This is slick; I'll have to take a closer look, of course, but on the surface this seems both flavorful & rules-sharp. Thanks for posting!

I have many rivals.

Gah! I have work that night! Fie, blast & hell!

Oooh, sexy!

Will there be an eventual ebook version of this?

Darn good question! I've got a MOBI file of the book, created by the amazing and talented Darrin Drader, and I'm very interested in making it available for sale through this site. I'll have an answer for you soon, pinkie-promise!

Boomer's novel The Hole Behind Midnight is urban fantasy and quite good. I'm almost done and I've been loving it.

... and here's the book, available for sale through Paizo!

The Hole Behind Midnight ... boo-yah!

Congratulations, sir, and well done!

Fear the great white north, for it holds many horrors in its lasting darkness.

... by which I mean, obviously, that I'm looking forward to this one a LOT!

Ooooh, this is going to be an awesome competition!

Congratulations to everyone, and I look forward to seeing more! Fight, fight, fight!

Are you saying we should hold it in Japan? is confused

Yes. PaizoCon 2012: Japan.

We'll all it 'KaijuCon' ... wait, that's already taken by a bunch of anime nerds? Okay, fine, 'BishiCon'.

... wait, that's taken, too? I give up.

WOOOO! Man, this blog-post is a ...

Oh. Oops. I was going to say "a dream come true", but that's just awful. It's, like, half a pun. At best.

Eh, heck with it: it's a dream come true!

CLARK! A pleasure to hear from your amazing self, and I'm glad to see you popping in and saying hello!

I'll even reiterate & echo your cheer: "... I love Superstar and I love the process and I love Paizo and everyone associated with the process. Believe me, you will be glad you submitted {to RPG Superstar}."

Hip-hip-hooray! If you've got an idea for an item, send it!

Also: thank you for the monkeys, Snorter. Monkeys make the world a better place.

Who wants a game in which people wear pants? If I don't have to wear pants when I play, I see no reason why my PC should have to.

I love you, Mark Moreland. That line made my day, and now it's on my Facebook.

Monkey pants are damn funny. Notice that they're not tied to the monk class, and not called monk-ee pants.

For those wondering, here are the Monkey Pants in question, re-posted from the gag-item thread of RPG Superstar 2008. Truly, my finest moment as a game designer.

Pants of the Many Monkeys

This simple pair of khaki adventuring pants contains, hidden in its many goody-sized pockets, monkeys. Many, many monkeys.

Each day, upon command ("Monkeys!") the pants produce 3d12 monkeys (see page 267, MM). These monkeys are CRAZY monkeys, however, and no amount of training, yelling or stomping of feet will get these monkeys to stop it with their crazy monkey shenanigans. The monkeys are possessed both a limited magical 'hive-mind' and an overwhelming, capricious desire to perform acts of mischief and tomfoolery.

The monkeys will probably eat all the rations and poop in the bedrolls. They will pants the cleric and 'honk' the elf's boobs. Also, they like to trip people, drink ale, and steal hats. The monkeys speak French.

Moderate Conjuration; CL 5th; Craft Wondrous Item, Summon Nature's Ally III, Prestidigitation; Price 8,000 gp., 2 lbs.

Jay,

My best advice to you, which I will note is worth EXACTLY what you paid for it, is to get the flavor and the rules and the coolness and the WONDROUS-NESS exactly where you want them and then tweak ever so slightly during the rounds upon rounds of editing in your future.

Por Ejemplo: you've got a super-cool item that is ever-so-slightly similar to a previous winning entry ... like, I don't know, greaves of the awesome monkey or something. Well, that will never do - even if YOUR item gives bonuses to dodging and throwing improvised weapons instead of Balance and Climb. So, change the part that's too similar, and then re-approach it.

Do they have to be greaves? Maybe they can be bracers. Or gauntlets. Or a hat. Or a crown! Or something slot-less, like ioun stones but way cooler because it's a floating halo or something.

OR: does it have to be monkeys? Other creatures jump around and throw stuff. Maybe another OGL monster is more appropriate! Something else with ranged attacks and high dexterity.

Now that they're called slot-less bracer-gauntlets of the awesome drow-sniper riding a trained basilisk, take another look at your rules.

ALSO NOTE: the name of your item will be MUCH better!

Oh, cool! Thank you for posting this, Lisa!

GO RITE!

Oh, wow, dude! Congrats!

Oh, sweet! I'm excited for all the entrants! There's nothing in the world like RPG Superstar!

Hmm, if the landwalker symbiote works anything like I'm imagining, I could use that in Shackled City quite well...

As a big fan of Shackled City, I'm intrigued about the idea of using the mimic-suit!

Very cool! Let me know how it works out for you!

Ooooooh, super-sexy!

Ooooooooh, that's super-sweet looking!

I love it!

Working on an Ad for Wayfinder #2

I am not a graphic artist though I did stay in a Holdiay Inn Express last night.

Oh, that's sexy!

Female player enjoying Merisiel the Elf Rogue: "I rapier him from behind."
Me (DM): "Rapier is not a verb."
Merisiel: "It is the way I do it, max sneak attack damage!"
Me (DM): *Checks notes*... "You rapier him from behind so hard his grandparents retroactively walked with a limp."

A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -*gasp* HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!

I peed a little.

Does anyone know if this one is named after 'China syndrome' from the real world?

I also happen to know! As noted by James: "yes".

Collected quotes from a long-running Pirates of the Caribbean & Serenity/Firefly-themed 3.5 D&D Iron Kingdoms/Ebberon/SpellJammer game which I ran.

My friend Dusty played the Captain.

Dave: "Wait, your robot's name is 'Apple'?"
Kyle: "No, I think you just always call him 'apple'."
Dusty: "For the last time, he's a Warforged Juggernaut, his name is Apollorax, and he outranks you on this ship."
Dave: " ... we have a robot butler named Apple?"

Dusty: "Where is the prisoner?"
J.B.: "Uh, yeah, he ... died."
Chris: "Trying to escape."
Dusty: "Into SPACE?"
J.B.: " ... yeah. Made a run for it."
Chris: "He didn't make it very far."

Mr. Hubris: "Well, this is pleasant."
Kyle: "For you, perhaps."
Mr. Hubris: " ... I wasn't talking to you."
Dave: "F*** this, let's kill him."

Kyle: "You two - seppuku contest! Right now! Your Emperor commands it!"

Corey: "Can you botch Pilot rolls?"
Dave: "No, it's a skill check. You rolled a one?"
Corey: "Yeah. Boomer, I got a thirty-nine."
All: (spit takes)
Boomer: "... Wow, you ARE a good pilot."

Kyle: "All right, that's it - I'm inviting this mother-f***er to DINNER."
Sam: "Oh, Lord. We need to TALK to him, not kill him."
Dave: "You guys kill everyone you have dinner with?"
Corey: "Statistically, yes."

Davian Kash: "RrrrraaaagghhhhaaaAAAA!"
Corey: "That's it, I'm out - I don't even need this job."

Sam: "Did you just rip his soul out of his body through his face?"
Kyle: "Only I would wield such power - only I would dare."

Dave: "Run, you idiot!"
Sam: "No! I'm staying!"
Dave: "If you die too, who will avenge me?"
Sam: "How about Kyle?"
Dave: "No, f*** him. He sucks. I want YOU to avenge me."

Dave: (gurgling blood) "Remember . . . "
Sam: "God, that's creepy. I'm gonna wake up hearing that for months."
Corey: "Yeah, I'm glad I'm not there. The last thing I need is nightmares of Dave's dying words."

Corey: "So where's the captain?"
Kyle: "Probably negotiating the trade of our ship for magic beans."
Sam: "Hope he gets enough for all of us."

Kyle: "And once your ship is completed, where will you go?"
Arrin: "Why, wherever we please, of course."
Dave: (whispered) "I want to kill this guy."
Kyle: (whispered) "If you think you can do it in six seconds or less, be my guest."

Corey: (whispered) "Give her the baby."
Jen: "Oh, my Jesus-F***, you're a monster! She's a demon-queen!"
Corey: "Come on. Give her the kid."
Kyle: "I'm going to pretend you didn't say that."
Corey: "Pretend whatever you want - but you should give her the baby. It solves, like, eight different problems."

All: "Dave, NO!
Sam: "Dammit, stand down! This is what he wants you to do! He's goading you into a fight!"
Dave: "Well, f*** him. I should kill him for trying to trick me like that - I rage and Power Attack."

Graz'zt: "I don't trust you. I hope the feeling is mutual."
Dusty: "Oh, trust me, it is."

Dave: "Demogorgon & the Abyssals - tonight only at the Civic Center!"

Kyle: "Wait, why are we doing this again?"
Dusty: "Because I said so."
Corey: "Great reasoning."
Dusty: "Fine. Because I'm the captain, and I said so."

Dave: "I'll just go heat this up, then."
Jen: "Oh my God - he's the COOK!?! He's a lizard monster!"
Dusty: "Yeah ... but he fights like hell."

Kyle: "I will bring peace to this system, so help me god, if I have to personally kill every Human & Halfling on every world, one at a time."
Corey: "I'm in."
Dusty: "I think he was kidding."
Corey: "I wasn't."
Kyle: "Neither was I."
Sam: "In that case, count me in, too."

Sam: "To my knowledge, nothing like this has ever been tried before. Ever."
Dusty: "Oh."
Sam: "No, that's a good thing. I'm really excited about it."

Dusty: "Don't tell Kyle that I said this, but if any of you find anything cool, take it."
Kyle: "If any of you steal anything, I am f***ing leaving you here."
Sam: "Don't worry about me, man - I saw Aladdin. Touch nothing but the lamp."

Dusty: "Well, I think we got out of that scott-free."
Corey: "You're an idiot."
Dusty: "I mean, you know, MOSTLY scott-free."
Kyle: "Are you f***ing insane?"
Dusty: "Fine. At least I got out of that scott-free."
Dave: "Me too. Good job, Captain."
Dusty: "Thank you, Dave."

Dave: (to Kyle) "Tell me that he's not throwing loose change at the bard."
Dusty: "I'm not."
Kyle: "Because there ARE no bards in this game. He's throwing coins at the Expert with ranks in Perform."
Dusty: "I don't like his act."

Dave: "There is no reason to be hostile. We need not be enemies."
The Demon-Lady of Change: "You struck me with your club."
Dave: "Oh."
Kyle: "She remembers. Kill her!"

Dusty: "Wait ... Arch-Cardinals aren't supposed to have daughters!"
Kyle: "Oh, you figured that out NOW!"
Dave: "That guy was an Arch-Cardinal? Oh, this makes SO much more sense now."
Kyle: "Fu-- ga-- DA-- ARG!"

One of us! One of us!

I'm actually using the name of this book and its companion PC Pearls as the names of two regular features in Level Up.

Bah! That silly GM Gems was nothing compared to the inexhaustible wisdom contained in PC Pearls! Why, without the advice of Lord Bedlam Havok to make it shine like that magnificent Collection of Character Inspiration does, Gems is hardly much of a book at all!

It's more like ... not ... a book. For crappy jerks!

Planning to run this on Sunday, and I'm pondering the paladin of slaughter. Given the new lay on hands, would a "death touch" (1d6/two levels, save DC 10 + half paladin level + Cha mod) make the most sense, with an option to spend two uses for a channel negative energy burst? Should I consider adding some negative status effects (the opposite of mercies) to the touch as well? Any other ideas or suggestions?

Dude, good questions! Here's the real question: is this an OFFICIALLY-OFFICIAL kind of "For the Society!" game that you're going to be running, or is this a fun-with-friends kind of deal?

If it's for the Society: don't change nothing! The adventure is designed to run using pre-PFRPG rules, and the official rules on alternate Paladins have not yet been released and might never be.

Now, if it's for FUN: hells yes, death touch should inflict "anti-mercies!" That's awesome!

In fact, in one early draft of the the adventure, the Paladin of Slaughter actually had a unique feat, available ONLY to drow servants of Abraxus, to use their full Paladin level as their caster level & to gain one sorcerer/wizard spell of their choice as a divine paladin spell of the same level; the spell also gained the [Chaotic] & [Evil] descriptors when cast by them.

Heck, there was originally a much higher-level Paladin of Slaughter for the higher-tier of the adventure, who fought with sword, shield and scorching ray. This, of course, just ate up GOBS of word-count, and the saner head of the multi-talented & good-looking Josh Frost prevented me from doing anything too crazy for the adventure.

My advice is to make the Paladin of Slaughter a particularly tough foe; as other players have noted, depending on the party, the toughest single fight CAN be the swarms in Encounter 1.

Plus, there's a certain amount of wisdom in keeping the modules self-contained and limiting the buy-in requirements for the line.

For the Coliseum Morpheuon mega-adventure/mini-setting, a LOT of my Patrons requested that it should serve, in some way, as a "sequel" to one or more of the Adventure Paths; all I could tell them was that since I don't have the rights to Paizo IP, I couldn't do it ... legally.

The truth is, pulling off a 15th-20th level super-sequel to an AP (either ongoing or past) would be a real feat; the time & energy necessary to execute such a thing in a way that pleased both rabid fans of the AP and newbies-to-the-story would make it nearly impossible.

... also: James, you work too darn hard. Spending a Saturday editing my turnover of 'Infernal Syndrome' and also posting here? Get yourself a Snickers or something, man!

Wow. *sniff* My first game equation! And it didn't involve calculating CR! Thanks, Z!

Now THAT'S an accomplishment! Awesome!

Back from GenCon with two copies of the Pathfinder Core Rules - one for each hand!

Running over-the-top-awesome games for Tim Hitchcock, Adam Daigle, their cadre of super-GMs (including Shackletons and a certain Head-Eating Yoda) & many wonderful players of the Pathfinder Society has honed my adventure-fu to a razor edge, and we're moving forward on design, hammering that fluff into gold!

Next step is getting my copy of the Pathfinder Bestiary, which is when the real crunch-work starts!

Again, thank you to everyone involved!

Hmmm ... that's close enough to me that I could actually make it without violating my "No more out-of-state Cons this summer" rule!

Keep us posted, eh?

In the event of emergency, Sam Berry (player of Tordek) and I will drive back to Indy to fetch Paizonians. It's what we WereCabbages do, and I think that I'm technically closest.

Just light up the Cabbage Symbol if you need us, and shine it toward the Mississippi!

Oh, sweet! Checking it out now!

Thanks for the link, man!

Thank you, sincerely and deeply, to everyone who has jumped on board this project! We're going to have a great time - and this project is going to be killer-sweet!

Steve, I hope you're feeling better today!

I didn't want to say anything, but your avatar has been looking a little sickly for some time now - it's now surprise that the great news about Ashton getting on board this project might overwhelm you!

Take care - we don't have enough Russell to go around, if you drop on us!

Oh, cool!

Consider an email SENT!

What did Boomer do?

Boomer, madman that he is, has built a comedy-themed adventure based around a ribald & raucous group of Pathfinder-universe performers called the Merry Jackanapes - the whole she-bang debuted at PaizoCon II, run by myself & one Mr. Hugo "Butterfrog" Solis, and we were honored to have a fantastic & insane time at the table with wonderful players (including the always wonderful SunshineGrrrl)!

The adventure, originally designed as a one-off, 4-hour event in the style of the Pathfinder Society Scenarios, is currently undergoing another round of edits, some further development, and expansion at the hands of the aforementioned crew, plus Adam Daigle and Ashton "N'Wah" Sperry.

Once it's ready, you'll get to see it, guaranteed - for now, check out this thread on the topic:
http://paizo.com/paizo/messageboards/paizoPublishing/paizocon/hugoMidsummer sNightComedyGame

Ah, my Brothers Kikai, Frost, Shadowborn & Daigle! I had not realized that we were all of such holy leanings!

I, myself, am ordained the Right Reverend Clinton J. Boomer by the Universal Life Church, and I'm pleased as ... PUNCH to learn that we're a denominationally-inclined collective!

Perhaps we can get our next PaizoCon tax-free ...

I again want to thank everyone for their feedback! I'm glad that people have enjoyed this adventure, and I wanted to respond to comments about the difficulty of the Faction missions.

I thought that this scenario was a lot of fun, but during the two times that I ran it at Paizocon only two characters (total) completed their faction missions. I think the missions in this game were difficult on purpose...

This is 100% correct, but I certainly hope that no one was too frustrated by the increase in difficulty, which was not intended to be TOO sudden. A lot of effort (by writers, but even more by the esteemed Mr. Josh Frost) is put into balancing the difficulties of the Faction Missions for the Scenarios, and while I thought this one was balanced (in that they were all pretty hard), I'll take any blame for error.

By the way, [bDarian Graey[/b], I'm sorry that your GM rubbed your magical loss in your face. The power hidden behind the door is really meant to be lost, no matter what, but your instincts were good. Oh, those stupid paladins!

Hey, all! Just wanted to pop in and thank everyone both for their kind words and for their feedback - I'm a fan of this adventure myself (having been given the opportunity to play through it on two separate occasions at PaizoCon!), and I also hope to be able to answer questions & respond to concerns.

As to your most recent question, Doug Doug, specifically regarding the Chronicle Sheet and the omitted spoiler, the intention from the beginning was that the PCs simply can't get the prize. Having access to something like that would be game-breaking, at least in a shared world like the Society.

Of course, allowing access to an artifact-level secret like that in a HOME game would be up to the individual GM!

Thank you, Vic!

For those interested in discussion on this adventure, head over here!

GAAAHHHHHH!!!!! A signed Hardcover? ~swears~ I will not do the Gold Level Patronage! I will not do the Gold Level Patronage! I will not.... ~you hear an "URK?!?" followed by a strangled scream~

Oh, no! Good-hearted Sharoth has transmogrified into the monster called only EVIL OVERLORD - and I am to blame! What horrors have I unleashed upon the world with my ... my ... writing!?!

All I wanted was to make the world a better & more gonzo place!

I'm, like, a post-modern Dr. Herbert West ... himself, a post-modern Victor Frankenstein! Who was, now that I think about it, sort or a Prometheus figure or something, if I remember the Cliff's Notes correctly.

... anyway, uh ... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

AWESOME! It's even prettier in color & on my computer!

Awesome, Emily! Many thanks...

She is amazing!

Which reminds me, thanks for the awesome rendition of Father Kinterkoff during the Convocation -- I'd be happy to lift a mug with you to Cayden Cailean any day (or whichever god Kinterkoff is pretending to worship at the time)!! :-)

A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Awesome!

It was a treat to get to slip him in to the Convocation - he's a bad man, and now he's CANON!

Also, I'd just like to echo kikai13 (and everyone else who said it!) with a strong and hearty THANK YOU!!! to Zuxius. If there was one thing about the Con that kicked it from 100% awesome to 111%, it was Zux!

... And I'm looking forward to doing illustrations for it, too.

Good, and glad to have you in our corner! We'll set something up; you're also 111% right that DMTools is probably our best bet. I'll send a CC to you and Daigle (my editor) on anything that Hugo & I discuss and we'll get the ball rolling.

I'm so totally doing an adventure where everyone plays as one of Pestico's "daughters" (the soulbound dolls) in a wacky adventure that I hope to lay out like a story book. I'd love to shoot some ideas at you for that, if you're interested.

Let's not say too much here, but I'm totally in - kick me an email any time!

This weekend was, in all sincerity, the best time I've had in years; it was, I kid you not, simultaneously the best anniversary and the best Con that a man could ever hope for.

Big thanks to EVERYONE!

A big THANK-YOU!!! to all of my players for making this adventure even more fun than I had hoped it would be!

This is gonna be a really, really fun game!