Brother Faust the Elder's page

What if I want to run a paladin of the God of killing babies?

I have it on good authority that this "Pelor" cult masquerading as a NG sun gawd is secretly a demon lord/prince/whatever. Sounds good to me ... ;)

What is the logic behind that... why are liches immune to electricity?

Absorbed to recharge the phylactery.

Mark Sweetman wrote:

I'd go with 'not being eaten' as the boon.

No, you want to be eaten first.

If you're going to go, go in a smile.

If you have any friends left at this point, they can maybe bring you back from the pellet trail ...

I myself am looking for a new system to play my fantasy games with. I am a huge fan of Warhammer and own everything for 1st 2nd and 3rd editions and that is probably what I will use as I love the setting and gritty dirty feel of the world. But I am always up for a new system and have been toying with Savage worlds when the new edition is released soon.But hearing of the recommendations of GURPS I'm a little curious about the system now. My questions are since I am basically looking for a simpler or less rulsey game with less options for players and GM's alike.

Is GURPS a rules heavy system with a ton of rules and ways to over maximize the characters? IMO Pathfinder concentrates to much on that aspect of the game to much and that becomes the main focus.

GURPS is only as rules-heavy as you let it be. That's its stength and its curse. The GM has to invest some time into figuring out what they want to monkey around with. That having been said, there is a GURPS Lite that used to be a free PDF. (Don't know if it is now.)

Bad guys can be as simple as Perception 12, DR 3 armor, dodge 5, parry 9, shield block 9, stabby skill 12, shooty skill 12, 12 HP, disads: code of honor (loyal minion), minion of Da Boss #2, adv: alchohol tolerance, knows stuff heroes need to find out about 9; quirk: macks on hawt wimmen PCs 15. Loot: 15 gp. Done.

Da Boss #2 might be Perception 15, DR 7 magic bling, dodge 12, boot to the head skill 15, shooty spell 18 (2d6 impaling), 15 HP plus High Pain Threshold, disads: megalomaniac, can be tricked in monologuing once, allergic to eggs; adv: extra life, big golem critter buddy, other bad guy stuff 13, quirk: wants to capture heroes, maim them and toss 'em into his newest deathtrap - if they escape, he shoots to kill; other quirk: overly fond of Guiness and [insert hawt / studly PCs hair color here] eye candy; Loot: DR 7 magic bling, legal title to the Duchy of Studly, one Wealth level increase for all PCs, one level Status increase for all PCs, "action" for a month for free from grateful peons.

The actual rules read more complex than this, but this is a prime example of how simple you can make it if you choose.

That's okay, since (if memory serves) the lyre is only usable once a week. Either way, without pertinent skills such "fortifications" won't do any good. The lyre is ideally suited to such endeavors as field fortifications and in the hands of a highly skilled player can facilitate a proper siege envelopment and counter-envelopment in a few hours.

Pulling off a successful siege only begins with locking down the city ... :)

incidentally, this thread has been exceptionally useful.

I do have a question though - is it possible to 'upgrade' a zombie horde with better weapons and armor? the rules would seem to indicate you could indeed stuff zombies into masterwork leather armor and shamble them towards Pitax.

The weapons wouldn't do much good for the heartbeat-challenged, but the armor could. Resources should be given to an army with what makes the most sense. Controlling that many zombies is the tricky part!

Aberzombie wrote:

Crimson Jester wrote:

Zombie Pizza Delivery Girl wrote:

{casts Reanimate Thread}

Ya know, I kinda expect the pro-hearbeat propagandist bias in the media, but now they aren't even trying to appear fair.

Um I think the last option is a little bit off. Yeah you can mimic them but only from a distance and only upwind.

Hey! You're not one of us....!

You know what we do to the living on this thread?

Puts on a bib depicting a brain dripping red, then prepares the condiments tray.

Shall we?

James Jacobs wrote:

Awesome.

I'm doing my part. Product PURCHASED (insert sound of cash register here).

Don't open the cover James!...

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

That only costs 1 SAN. It's reading that tome that does the real damage ...

"But it's about the story!"

Achilles was an utter bad-ass with only one weak spot. He was brought low by some chowderhead too chicken to stab him in the face. Result: dead hero, awesome story. Lesson: dead heroes DO tell tales! It's all in the dying, it's all in the dying...

My sons, they're about to become all gown up. I would sniff and even shed a tear over my joy at this prospect ... if it wasn't for being rather inhuman in body in the aftermath of AoW and all that.

I'm not dead yet!

You're working on it already, I can tell...

Diction wrote:

wraithstrike wrote:

Diction wrote:

"You want to play a monk in any European-based fantasy setting, we'll give you an Oracle and outfit you with a brown robe, a holy book, and have you take one of the Vows from the Book of Exalted Deeds." --- quoting my DM

I tend to agree with him on this subject, even with the varied cultures of Golarion. Your kungfu master has no place in our game.

But I digress, my popcorn is ready and I would much rather watch this pointless thread drag on. Seriously, do people think their e-peen will increase in size if the make a purposely volatile thread that generates over 75 posts?

Your world has no martial artist or is it that only western things exist meaning eastern martial artist are not availible?

Eastern martial artists are unavailable (the monk class is banned).

Oh noes my Greek pankration artist won't be allowed in your games, what about my zen archer representing a Scottish caber-tosser?

;)

Now the caber tosser is a particularly excellent candidate for juju zombie status. Just give the word ... and start hanging out with goblyns, those chaps toss cabers in true style.

Brother Faust the Elder wrote:

TriOmegaZero wrote:

We doing this? Really? You really going there? :P

I'll zombify the loser. :P

Again?

Only if you lose. ^_^

We doing this? Really? You really going there? :P

I'll zombify the loser. :P

Brains don't leak out of plastic bags. Much nicer than when they leak through the paper and cloth-eco-conscious-canvas-tote bags.

EDIT: And I forgot, they make excellent kitteh litter receptacles without having to stink up the mausoleum. And dawg poo receptacles too ... and a thousand other little uses ...

Like the aforementioned suffocation bit. Who knew that everyone likely has an improvised garrote in their home? ^_^

Merisiel Sillvari wrote:

scifan888 wrote:

If anyone kills that jerk Alain and destroys his soul would anyone care?

Alain would.

Anyone else?

Only if I lack the onyx to animate the corpse.

I cast Raise Thread.

The thread now has 2 negative levels. And I'm out 5000gp of diamond dust.

Should have gone with reincarnate thread, it hasn't even been a full week yet ...

Wouldn't correct English grammar indicate you should have said "Took it from a dead guy who wasn't as good at stabbing folks as I,"?

After she stabs you, I call dibs on any loot she doesn't take. Which includes your corpse ... I have some onyx in need of using ...

Killer_GM wrote:

I regret the delay in putting this latest entry together. I wish it would be more worthy of your wait, but alas… In Last Saturday’s session of the campaign classics campaign, there were Zero (0) Player character fatalities. It was a depressing day at the game table...

I continue to hope that this was an elaborate April Fool's prank from our favorite campaign.

*Sigh*

I can assure you that the lack of fatalities was no prank by the KGM. Maybe by his players on him ...

Aberzombie wrote:

Brother Faust the Elder wrote:

Aberzombie wrote:

Brother Faust the Elder wrote:

Nay Aberzombie, the plants are also among the heart-beat challenged. However, lacking in intellect, they are indiscriminate in their targeting.

And you have to admit ... we are more aggressive in "requisitioning field rations" ...

Why, the Yellow Musk Creeper even contributes to the pool of heart-beat challenged!

I ain't gonna trust 'em. A lot of them would be just as happy to use us as fertilizer.

An alliance with Yellow Musk Creepers against the rest? Talk about convenience ... sopoforic pollen makes bbrrraaaaiiinnssss much easier to acquire...

But we reserve the right to stab them in the back as soon as we think they're going to turn on us?

Of course, the Yellow Mold may have been listening to this conversation ...

... and now knows who its real friends are.

Yellow Mold is also dumber than a bag of hammers and has no language skills ...

To paraphrase:

"We're GHOULS! Which part of "we eat brains" didn't you understand?!"

Quick Aberzombie, pass me the bacon ranch dressing ... the pollen's thick on this one ...

Brother Faust the Elder wrote:

Nay Aberzombie, the plants are also among the heart-beat challenged. However, lacking in intellect, they are indiscriminate in their targeting.

And you have to admit ... we are more aggressive in "requisitioning field rations" ...

Why, the Yellow Musk Creeper even contributes to the pool of heart-beat challenged!

I ain't gonna trust 'em. A lot of them would be just as happy to use us as fertilizer.

An alliance with Yellow Musk Creepers against the rest? Talk about convenience ... sopoforic pollen makes bbrrraaaaiiinnssss much easier to acquire...

So, no go for a Yellow Mold Speaker eh ? ^_^

Nay Aberzombie, the plants are also among the heart-beat challenged. However, lacking in intellect, they are indiscriminate in their targeting.

And you have to admit ... we are more aggressive in "requisitioning field rations" ...

Why, the Yellow Musk Creeper even contributes to the pool of heart-beat challenged!

Never fear, the Brothers Faust will lay waste to at least 3 of the miserable buggers ...

As Brother Hamster can attest to, were it not for Hero Points, the equivalent of them would have kakked 4 of his group ... good times, good times !! ^_^

P.S. we shall of course correspond on the various Slave Lords ... although I profess to preferring that my good Sons administer the Smacketh Down upon Thy Uppity Player Characers. Leaving one to survive to recruit more Maggots...

Soon my sons, soon ...

Are there bbbrrraaaaaaiiiinnnsssss to be had ? I can't believe that this has not been asked before in this thread...

Excellent ... I suggest we start with sporting events ...

Where should we start?

Detroit and Baltimore ?

Have you eaten a brain today? I know I have ... omnomnomnom

Are there any other columns ?

"Documentation": death certificates; orders of execution; letters of marque

"Training": mass grave digging 101; paper shredding 305: advanced methods relating to the destruction of self-incriminating evidence; WikiLeaks

"Newt Technology": limb regeneration development - theoretical phase; cloning technology that won't piss off the religious extremists; growing brains on the backs of rodentia

I firmly expect Season 1 to hit DVD and other media devices come spring ... although Halloween would be appropriate.

nom

Your co-workers will be grateful that you hunger for plankton as opposed to proper nourishment (to paraphrase the much more notorious Aberzombie): BBBRRRAAAAAIIINNNNSSSS ....

Aberzombie wrote:

Brother Faust the Elder wrote:

Bran McChomperface wrote:

Aberzombie wrote:

Is that anything like The Soul Train?

Yup. Only funkier.

Get down with our dead selves ... :)

So, we should have our own dance - maybe the Zombie Shuffle?

Don't we always do the Zombie Shuffle when we're going after victims? Er, I mean when we are meeting new friends?

I'd prefer the Ghoul Tango ... step, step, claw, paralysis, chomp, chew, munch, spawn, step, step ...

Aberzombie wrote:

Is that anything like The Soul Train?

Yup. Only funkier.

Get down with our dead selves ... :)

They are not Zombie's they are Ghouls. Get it right. :P

If the "nice people" want to use the wrong phrase ... they'll learn the hard way soon enough.

Nomnomnom

Shhhh...Don't give away our strategy to the cattl...er...I mean....nice people.

Most of them don't believe in us anyway. ^_^ Nothing like hiding in plain sight.

Once the general populace becomes accustomed to seeing "joke" warnings, they shall fall victim to the devouring hordes that they blithely drive into the midst of after laughingly ignoring the serious warning signs.

Nom

That's an excellent starting point for what I have in mind ... >:)

what about those new vegiterian brains?

Tofubrains smell funny ... there's no way to mistake them for proper brains...

My friend, whom last month I had to talk out of suicide over the phone, is doing much better. Is still in dead-end job but is coherent enough to start working her way out of it. Is very good news.

Also, Halloween on $10:
One bag of candy for trick-or-treaters...$7
One bag of candycorn for personal eating...$2
...$1 for decorating?!

Ended up with two tiny pumpkins and making paper cutouts of dancing skeletons. It worked!

Also, birthday! For me. I have acquired... rent money, I hope. And leftover candycorn.

Happy Brainday! :)

We have cherry-flavored brains with chocolate sauce. Banana-rum marinaded brains. Absinthe-and-sugar brains. Brisket brains. Chili brains. Cheese-n-beef brains. Strawberry brains. Pun'kin bundt cake brains. Various beer marinade brains.

Casper did you bring ectoplasmic brains? A new delicacy is major points for a potluck!

Anyone have any tasty appendages, spicy internal organs or a small herd of self-propelled field rations?

Happy Brainday to me ... *nomnomnom* ... Happy Brainday to me ...

Damn! I forgot to watch Walking Dead last night. And I can't remember if I told the wife to DVR it or not.

Missus Faust and I shall be watching it tonight from our DVR as part of Happy Brainday celebrations that have been ongoing since Friday night.

Today is my 40th Brainday ... *sniffs* ... *noms on his own brain* ... mmmmm ... nomnomnom ...

Dread Lord Zombie wrote:

Finally, a TV show about us. But like all the movies about the undead we'll probably be shown to be the bad guys. *sigh*

Good. Bad. We're the ones with the horde.

The ones with/in the horde ... (re)writes history.

So be sure at least one of us has a manipulative appendage when all is said and done.

Who says you have to bite them?

Doesn't every self-respecting heartbeat-challenged have equally infectious material under their fingernails?

Or, failing that, perhaps a blowgun and a supply of darts? Just poke yourself somewhere appropriate and *pfffwwtt* infection spreads.

Why settle for just one Patient Zero, when you can have 100?

We'll have to shamble across the seabed. All the local continent's brains - all five of them - have been eaten already.

Aberzombie keeps out-shambling me to the brains! A brain-narfer gets hungry now and then ... and old impulse of the previous living days I suppose.

sighs

Alrighty ... I'm going to Belgium first. Chocolate with brains, anyone?

Casper the Brain-Eating Ghost wrote:

I don't have a tapeworm, and yet somehow I never gain weight.

{standing on scale, stares at Casper jealously} Stupid men, never gain weight.

My dear, you are undead too ... embrace your innards' tapeworms, as it were.

The ghost is just being itself ... all incorporeal and whatnot.

Dennis Harry wrote:

Too bad we can't use dominate on our wives....

Mine is pretty cool about it, I had to go through several women till I found the right one :-)

I'm glad your spouse is generous in that regard. With any luck, I'll be where you are in 10-15 years from now...

Probably not until after the little ones are grown and out of the house my friend. So ... 20 years or so. ^_^

Aberzombie wrote:

Mmmmm.....yarn

Like tapeworm without the calories!

But ... tapeworms are the secret to the undead's svelt figures ... while we're eating brains, faces and innards, the tapeworms devour it all and keep us from the pesky details of digestion...

Zombie Poodle wrote:

Aberzombie wrote:

You ever get the feeling we're being watched? Like maybe some Hollywood type is monitoring this thread to try and steal some of our ideas and turn them into another zombie-bashing movie?

Next thing you know, poodles will be in movies as zombies too.

Resident Evil 5: The Humpening?

Residential Evil Zombie Dogs Eat Brains Too

Maybe we should write a recipe book.

I think there might be some "life-challenged" reading selections in the local bookstores. After chasing some dinner through an attached coffee shop - rather silly decision - I saw something along the lines of "Zombies Cookbook" on a table while I was chowing down.

I didn't read the book right then, as I was a bit of a mess and did not want to ruin a perfectly good book with bits of left overs you see...