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Pirahna

Angel Fish's page

210 posts. Alias of Kobold Cleaver.


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Who used up all my special unholy bleach? That stuff's hard to find. I was going to feed it to a troublesome celestial who blindly follows the dubious orders of another troublesome celestial. Who I was going to subtly shove through the gates of Abaddon, but somebody sealed it.
I was so close to making this place resemble a good-aligned plane....


Celestial Healer wrote:
Bow before me.

*Sigh*

Yes, sir.


Celestial Follower wrote:

I...

think...
you've...
discovered...
the...
true...
path...
to...
civility...

Corn Nuts

X_X


*Wakes up*
...
Two questions.
Who peed in my fishbowl?
Why do I feel like I used a Channel Energy in my sleep?
And who do I have to kill for tipping the zombie girl again?


Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Thaumoctopus wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
CF, I hope you are preparing our thread for the appropriate holiday festivities.
The slaadi shipped over a couple gallons of fresh eggnog. I'm stringing up popcorn shrimp for garland.

That's good, that's good.

Who's preparing the sacrifices?

I told you, NO SACRIFICES this year!


All we have here are Destroying Angels.


Ginny Pig wrote:

Excellent! He's fallen for the decoy, while I'm still in my adamantine fortress.

Won't they be surprised when the decoy explodes. Hee hee hee.

*Knocks at the door of the fortress*

Seafood delivery!


Crimson Jester wrote:
is it warm in here to you?

Is it...gah!

*Runs off muttering something about pyromaniac followers*


*Grabs warhammer and charges*
FOR THE OTHER WHITE MEAT!


Celestial Healer wrote:
Angel Fish wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:
Why is there a pig out there building houses made of straw, wood, brick, vinyl siding, and adamantine?

*staggers back into thread, winded*

Blow as I might, that adamantine house would not come down!

That had better not mean something dirty.

*Sigh* I guess it's up to me. Where did we put the warhammer?

But... but...

You don't have opposable thumbs.

NOT. THE. POINT.


Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:
Why is there a pig out there building houses made of straw, wood, brick, vinyl siding, and adamantine?

*staggers back into thread, winded*

Blow as I might, that adamantine house would not come down!

That had better not mean something dirty.

*Sigh* I guess it's up to me. Where did we put the warhammer?


Celestial Healer wrote:
Ginny Pig wrote:
*Gulp*
*begins inscribing a pentagram on the floor around Ginny Pig*

Hey! I said no pentagrams! We don't need any more fiendish animals here!"


Are you going to sacrifice another dog if we do? That farmer's getting ticked off.


Celestial Follower wrote:

Whoa! I didn't know I could summon undead!

Um, could you kindly gnaw on that heretic's brain.

<Points in a random direction>

Hey! Why are you pointing at me?


Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

*Phew*

He only got my left spleen. I'm a little dizzy, but I should make it.

I thought you could spontaneously cast Cure spells.

The last of them were used up this morning.

And somebody tell Shanky to get this oil rig out of my fishbowl before--
*Rig bursts*


Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

Do you realize how much it hurts to fall off a cloud?

Gravity sucks!

Seriously. It's the only thing that keeps me from flying.

*Floats over CH's head*


*Flies in, handing out pamplets*
"S\ick of your despicable, evil ways? Go to the Thread Celestial!"


Shanky the Dretchachaun wrote:
The gishing fish taught me that gish.

WHAT? I never--

Oh, right. That was the day CF made angel cake.


Aseve wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

Oof. Thanks for getting me out of the pit. I sure wish my do-it-yourself wing grafts would have taken. Anyway, I'm off to the store.

<Defenestrates self>

Be sure to get some sodas while you're out.
But no Sprite! I don't want a repeat of that fiasco with the fey.

*Sends flying out of window*

Stupid alphabet...


Celestial Follower wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
Did you pick up any recipes "down under"?
I'm avoiding recipes from that place. Remember the last time? The time we needed 20 regeneration spells?

Ah, yes. That was when I thought having five regenerations prepared would be plenty.


Celestial Healer wrote:
Crimson Jester wrote:
Are you back yet? Are your arms tired?

Indeed they are.

There was some awkwardness. People said, "How convenient for you; you don't have to fly commercially because you have those beautiful wings!" Not wanting to make myself look foolish, I didn't correct them, and to hide the non-functional nature of the wings, I swam the whole way here. People wanted to know why I was covered with seawater, though, so I just told them I had been hunting Dagon.

*sigh*

But, sir, your wings do work. YOu showed us last week, remember?


*Puts down tiles, eyes closed shut*
MUZJIKS--A Russian peasant.


Celestial Follower wrote:
Angel Fish wrote:

Interesting. According to these rules--

*Points to a blank space in the rules*
What? Uh...did you guys get a new game board?

The last one met with a...mysterious accident.

...

Curses.
Okay, I just have to, uh, fix some typos. *Starts adding rules in crayon*


Interesting. According to these rules--
*Points to a blank space in the rules*
What? Uh...did you guys get a new game board?


Celestial Follower wrote:

Woah! Looks like thawing you out really improved your Scrabble skills, Angel Fish!

So whose turn is it now?


Celestial Follower wrote:
Angel Fish wrote:

*Microwave explodes again and Angel Fish flies out*

*Floats to Scrabble game and dramatically places--*
GAH! PAIN AND SUFFERING! KILL ME! IT HURTS SO MUCH!
*Shakes it off and finishes putting down tiles*
Z-Z-X-X-Q-Z-W-X-V-Y-Z-Z-Z-X-Y...that spells Zzxxqzwxvyzzzxy. A type of fish located in the Far Realm by myself a few minutes ago. I named it, of course. So...how many points is that?

-132. Damned sign bit!

...

LOOK! SOMETHING SHINY, GUYS!
*Scribbles Triple Word Score under word with crayon*
Hey, look at that. Guess you must have missed this the first time.


*Microwave explodes again and Angel Fish flies out*
*Floats to Scrabble game and dramatically places--*
GAH! PAIN AND SUFFERING! KILL ME! IT HURTS SO MUCH!
*Shakes it off and finishes putting down tiles*
Z-Z-X-X-Q-Z-W-X-V-Y-Z-Z-Z-X-Y...that spells Zzxxqzwxvyzzzxy. A type of fish located in the Far Realm by myself a few minutes ago. I named it, of course. So...how many points is that?


*Microwave explodes*


Celestial Follower wrote:

Oh no! Poor Angel Fish!

<Sets fire to the couch. Water sprinklers start up.>

That'll make things better.

My bowl was on the couch.


Celestial Follower wrote:
Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:

I just woke up from the weirdest dream. I was on a messageboard, and I was posting on it. CH, you were there, and Angel Fish, and ululatoloth, and Microwave...well, there were flying winged microwaves, and there was a poppy field, and I was in a dress and ruby slippers. Then the dream got really weird...

I usually interpret dreams like that to mean that I am destined for great things. It's better than imagining my dreams are all about my mother or something...

I think Angel Fish is the only one who makes those interpretations.

I hate you all so much.


Celestial Healer wrote:
Angel Fish wrote:

*Puts on sunglasses*

Psst! Don't join the Thread Celestial! The people there are completely insane!
Hmph. Just who do you think you are? You wait until Angel Fish gets his hands on you.

Um, yes. I--I mean, Angel Fish, would truly despise him--I mean, me. I hate me--him, too, of course. Very much. That is because I--we are completely different fish. Of course, I'm not a fish. I'm a, um, sea cucumber. With fake fins. I am undercover. Yes. And now, my disguise having failed, I will, ah, hmm. Run away, I think. Yes.

*Bolts*


*Puts on sunglasses*
Psst! Don't join the Thread Celestial! The people there are completely insane!


Okay, who cast Time Stop on me?


10.


19, 18, 17, 16, 14...


Celestial Ninja wrote:
Angel Fish wrote:

Guys, I keep aying, STOP EATING CELESTIALS!

*Sushi bursts into holy fire*
Where was I?...ah, yes. I'm starting over, I suppose.
100, 99, 98...
Please accept my humble apologies Angel Fish-san. I have some Infernal sushi and sashimi too. It is quite difficult to prepare, as the stench of sulfur is difficult to remove.

Thank you. Perhaps you will be spare din the Purge.

50, 49, 48...


Guys, I keep aying, STOP EATING CELESTIALS!
*Sushi bursts into holy fire*
Where was I?...ah, yes. I'm starting over, I suppose.
100, 99, 98...


401...300! 299...298....297...


Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Follower wrote:
I'm not dead yet...
I would heal you, but I used up all my spells for the day animating the... Erm... Healing the needy of course.

*Holding pocket watch*

1,000. 999. 998. 997. 996. 995...


ulgulanoth wrote:
so how are we going to purge said evil? burn them at the stake? behead? crusify? burning crusifiction?....(countless other excecution methords)

Smiting them with pure energies, of course.


ulgulanoth wrote:

down with evil!

so... what happens if we do find any evil?

...

...we purge it. I've been looking forward to this all month.


Celestial Healer wrote:
Angel Fish wrote:
Guys, the monthly Evil Purge is coming up. Just so you guys don't claim I never warned you earlier.
Do apologies help?

Nope. There better not be anything evil here when the Evil Purge happens.


Guys, the monthly Evil Purge is coming up. Just so you guys don't claim I never warned you earlier.


Stop linking to hair, you idiots!


ulgulanoth wrote:
no, not the nachos!

You guys should know better than to eat such greasy food! Especially since it involves the enslavement of animals!


Celestial Follower wrote:
NACHOOOOOOOOS!!!!!

You just made my day. XD

*Nachos burst into holy fire*
Problem solved.


ulgulanoth wrote:
must add more fire... er... i mean nachos...

What was that? Did somebody say nachos?


Celestial Healer wrote:
Mmmm. Cheese.

Stupid aliases...

CH, instead of having those nachos, why not have some all-natural home-crushed peanut butter on celery?


ulgulanoth wrote:
that their tasty?

Hey! Nachos? That better be goat cheese!


*wakes up*
Huh? Where did that guy go? He took so long to reply, I must have fallen asleep!

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