Acme Robot's page

Whirrr klick Bloop!

Your jetpack is fueled with strontium and ready for your commute sir.

*BEEP*

Felicitations Lord and Lady Teter!

Devlyn checks out the bar area. It is about the same as it was in times past; mayhap a mite larger with a few more beers on tap. Acme whizzes along the bar's length, stocking various exotic bottles of liquor and rapidly slicing limes and lemons. An thin articulated arm with a circular saw at its tip emerges from his head and slices a coconut in half cleanly before retracting.

Do you wish another refreshment Lord Devlyn? Acme inquires, pouring the coconut milk into a chilled ewer.

*BEEP*

At once mistress

Acme zips about, filling the drink orders of the new arrivals. After a bit, a squad of young girls in white tees, aprons, and jeans miniskirts fan out and begin prepping the area for more arrivals. A large tent is raised on the grass. Tables and chairs are brought out.

*BEEP*

At once mistress. Gentlemen, your preferences?

The chrome-and-neon robot rolls off on his casters, returning quickly with a glass of golden fizzy liquid and a small shot glass of dark honey-amber fluid.

There you are sir. Can I get you anything else?

I'll take that with a shot of Irish whisky, if you please.

*BEEP*

Would you prefer Connemara, Black Bush, Bushmills 16 or 21-year variety, Jamesons, Clontarf, Tullamore Dew or Green Spot sir?

*BEEP*

We have Boylan's Reed's Knudsen's, Fafnir's and Mitchifer's Select for ginger ales. Any preference sir?

*BEEP*

At once Mistress.

The rolling retro-robot runs up to Irv.

"What is your pleasure, sir?"

A retro-Fifties robot shows up

*beep*

Yes sir?

*beep* present

Whizzes up with some Dark&Stormys

Here you are, Miss Lynora-Jill.

Acme comes whizzing into the clubhouse bearing a stack of kegs balanced precariously

"Ms. Lynora-Jill, I heard you say you needed kegs, so I took the liberty of procuring some."

Acme deploys the disruption defense field, rendering the borg's distintegration useless

Acme zips along the edges of the crowd, attempting to keep the guests' glasses full

Gimme that bottle, Acme! Sounds like class is in session!

*BEEP*

I apologize sir, but I must deliver this, as I was requested to.

Acme zips off with the tequila bottle a bowl of cut lemon wedges and some salt.

*beep*

Right away sir!

Hey Acme! Better line up more Dark & Stormys. Those ladies look to be working up a powerful thirst. In me at least.

*BEEP*

Right away sir!

Zips off

Hey Acme! How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? With a little paper umbrella in it?

Acme zips up with a tray of Dark and Stormies

*BEEP*

Here we are sir!

Acme begins whipping up snack platters and zipping them out to the guests

Does the Robot

Jack Hammer wrote:

"Acme, Rosie! How 'bout setting up some hoops on the lawn? Don't forget to add the landmines. Thx!"

Yes, sir. Right away, sir.

*Whirs off to set up the croquet field.*

*beep*

yes sir!

Follows Rosie

*beep*

As you wish sir

drops two cubes in the tumbler

WE

I'll take 2 of each, eh how much is that gonna cost? oh whatever put it on the poodle's bill.

*BEEP*

I will attempt to comply, but I am unsure our alcohol stocks can withstand 13,174 drinks. Also, the poodles have no credit, as they are notorious deadbeats ...

anybody got ice. I like my drinks on the rocks and without poodles. though poodles are very durable hakey sacks

A gleaming chrome retro-futuristic robot zips up to J&C

*BEEP*

I can make you any one of 6,587 different mixed drinks sir.

*BEEP*

Do tell sir .

Acme rolls up

*BEEP*

I'll make you one sir!

Quickly pours a Bloody Mary for JH

*BEEP*

Only on alternate Tuesdays sir.

HoD turns his back on Acme, and steps towards Alaina.

Join with me woman of fire.

When HoD turns his back, Acme reforms his chain guns and fires both at HoD's midsection

Acme's spikes seem to collect the elemental fury. Acme's armor seems to glow with a dozens of blue-white stars.

I may not command the energy, but I can certainly channel it.

Acme's spikes discharge the energy HoD sent over in an arc of fury straight back at him.

Feed me! Give me your life and your souls.

The berserker seems to call to the Bouncer and Alaina, and the soulforged blades the Bouncer wields. They feel compelled to obey.

He ignores yet another sabre slash, but the wound heals more slowly. Acme is the center of his attention.

Acme punches his two glowing runeblades into HoD's midsection. A crackling electricity travels off the blades into the Hammer of Death.

Bullets fly everywhere, as some are deflected by the earthbreaker, but many get thru. HoD is strengthened by the Hot of the hot lead, but not the lead part.

ARRRGGHHH!

He races towards Acme.

Acme keeps his guns trained on HoD until he approaches just far enough, then the guns morph into two huge glowing golden runic swords. He waits in a defensive stance, sword arms ready.

*BEEP*

YOU ARE AN INTRUDER! DEFEND THE SANCTUM!!

Acme transforms, his arms refashioning into two massive chain guns. The guns very odd-looking, covered in arcane runes. A layer of rune-encrusted armorplate envelops his slender form, increasing his size until he stands eight-feet tall. Spikes emerge along his arms and legs as the runes flash golden. Each spike is crackling with elemental fury.

Acme begins firing his twin chain guns, the whine sounding like a wounded griffon's scream. Glowing bullets trailing blue-green fire stitch a line across HoD's midsection.

*BEEP*

Busy Miss Alaina. But other than temple business nothing has occurred. I did see KC talking to Miss Lynora-Jill earlier

Acme Robot wrote:

*BEEP*

Here you are sir!

Delivers a Dark&Stormy to Corin

Thanks. Haven't you know, ever transformed into a motorcycle or large robotic dinosaur?

*BEEP*

A motorcycle yes, dinosaur, no sir.

Continues wiping down bar

*BEEP*

Here we are sir!

Hands Demolition Jack a Dark&Stormy

*BEEP*
Here you are sir!

Delivers a Dark&Stormy to Corin

JH arrives thru the omniportal.

I heard someone was pouring Dark & Stormys. Can't have a good party without them.

Heads to the bar.

Hey Acme! You're back!

*BEEP*

Here you are Mr. Hammer!

Passes JH a Dark & Stormy

Indeed, I am back, and hopefully I can remain a simple berkeep this time. I do seem to have problems when I attempt to do a hero's job.

Acme runs behind the bar and begins setting up Dark & Stormies.

Acme! Oh it's so wonderful to see you again! I'm so sorry about what happened to you before. Are you sure you finished repairing him, Malice Jack? she asks, looking a little concerned. Well, just to be sure...

*casts repair light damage*

*BEEP*

Thank you Miss Lynora-Jill

*BEEP*

Greetings everyone.

It's Acme, but he looks a bit different. The Bard's customizations are still there, but Malice aint the world's best smith

*BEEP*

No I see it too sir, most perplexing ...

You know, I'm starting my new job today. Could someone get me a Dark and Stormy?

Acme Robot zips a D&S over to the Cultist

*BEEP*

There you are sir!

Acme turns back to the banks of cloning machines and life support systems, but it is too late. An Abyssal voice counts down:

FIVE ... FOUR ... THREE ... TWO ... ONE

The Records Room explodes

Acme reaches the portal but it remains dark. He attempts to access it again, but it seems to be malfunctioning

Acme finishes recording the information remaining, then sets the machines strewn about to a self-destruct mode. He hurries over to the portal to escape.

*BEEP*

I will scan all remaining codexes and information before I detonate this thread Mr. Devlyn.

Acme starts riffing though any leftover paper

*BEEP*

I will stay behind and sabotage the area Miss Alaina. You all should return to the Jack's Clubhouse.

*BEEP*

My interior sensors indicate we were sequestered in a time loop for some time Miss Alaina.