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Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 09:41 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Sets up Sebastian/dummy for shooting practice Fixed it for you. How'd you get him to agree to it? Oh well, it doesn't matter. searches around for a LAW, and finds one under the couch The perfect weapon IMO!


General J. Debauchery, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 09:42 AM

Yknaps the Lesserprechaun wrote: Wow, is this place still around. I guess I didn't realize....what with the FaWTL threads getting so long..... punts Leper-Con back to FaWTL


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 09:44 AM

He who shoots first can go first.


Jack's Right Hand Man, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 09:45 AM

Yknaps the Lesserprechaun wrote: Wow, is this place still around. I guess I didn't realize....what with the FaWTL threads getting so long..... We can't be responsible for a bunch of FaWTL losers who need to quit posting so much and go out and get a life. Spoiler: Just joking! Don't flame me!


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 10:02 AM

Callous Jack wrote: He who shoots first can go first. Fine, since he with dibs hasn't found a weapon yet. Aims LAW at Sebastian effigy and fires. The rocket explodes and destroys its right side, and its silk suit burns with glee. "Take that, Pony Lawyer!" Begins singing 'Breakin' the Law, Breaking the Law'


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 10:04 AM

shoots the dummy with a shotgun Cheney-style


Jack's Right Hand Man, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 10:24 AM

Callous Jack wrote: shoots the dummy with a shotgun Cheney-style That was too accurate for Cheney. If it was Cheney-style it would have hit either Hammer or me while aiming for the dummy.


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 10:25 AM

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Callous Jack wrote: shoots the dummy with a shotgun Cheney-style That was too accurate for Cheney. If it was Cheney-style it would have hit either Hammer or me while aiming for the dummy. And in the back. :)


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 10:55 AM

I meant I was aiming for the face! pushes button for kobold minion to set up new dummy


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:00 AM

Callous Jack wrote: I meant I was aiming for the face! pushes button for kobold minion to set up new dummy 'accidentally' shoots kobold with 2nd LAW rocket


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:02 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: I meant I was aiming for the face! pushes button for kobold minion to set up new dummy 'accidentally' shoots kobold with 2nd LAW rocket Aw hell. pushes button again


Jack's Right Hand Man, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:05 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: I meant I was aiming for the face! pushes button for kobold minion to set up new dummy 'accidentally' shoots kobold with 2nd LAW rocket Looks like we know what Hungry Jack is going to make us for dinner- Kobold stew. Yummy!


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:07 AM

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Looks like we know what Hungry Jack is going to make us for dinner- Kobold stew. Yummy! Bleh, they're too gamey for me.


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:14 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Looks like we know what Hungry Jack is going to make us for dinner- Kobold stew. Yummy! Bleh, they're too gamey for me. Didn't know that kobolds could game. scratches head


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:16 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Looks like we know what Hungry Jack is going to make us for dinner- Kobold stew. Yummy! Bleh, they're too gamey for me. Didn't know that kobolds could game. scratches head shoots JackHammer "by accident" with his shotgun


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:19 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Looks like we know what Hungry Jack is going to make us for dinner- Kobold stew. Yummy! Bleh, they're too gamey for me. Didn't know that kobolds could game. scratches head shoots JackHammer "by accident" with his shotgun Oww! You pulled a Cheney on me!


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:24 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Looks like we know what Hungry Jack is going to make us for dinner- Kobold stew. Yummy! Bleh, they're too gamey for me. Didn't know that kobolds could game. scratches head shoots JackHammer "by accident" with his shotgun Oww! You pulled a Cheney on me! Er... it was JRHM...


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:25 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Looks like we know what Hungry Jack is going to make us for dinner- Kobold stew. Yummy! Bleh, they're too gamey for me. Didn't know that kobolds could game. scratches head shoots JackHammer "by accident" with his shotgun Oww! You pulled a Cheney on me! Er... it was JRHM... Ohhh...thanks. bleeds all over JRHM's nachos


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:27 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Ohhh...thanks. bleeds all over JRHM's nachos Ewww... Now then, where's my blunderbuss? waits for kobold to finish setting up pony target


Jack's Right Hand Man, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:34 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: bleeds all over JRHM's nachos Hey! smacks Hammer in the back of the head Shoots Hammer in the posterior with his crossbow


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:44 AM

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: bleeds all over JRHM's nachos Hey! smacks Hammer in the back of the head Shoots Hammer in the posterior with his crossbow Oww! Now how am I supposed to sit on my butt all day watching the pay channels? Besides we Jacks bleed Dark & Stormys. It's kinda like 'Is that Blood in my nachos or nachos in my blood?' Both are good.


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 11:48 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Oww! Now how am I supposed to sit on my butt all day watching the pay channels? Don't worry, I'll shoot the crossbow bolt out! BLAM!


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 5, 2009, 12:00 PM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Oww! Now how am I supposed to sit on my butt all day watching the pay channels? Don't worry, I'll shoot the crossbow bolt out! BLAM! Dang! Stop that! The shot is echoed by JH letting loose with a loud fart Do I look like a pony lawyer full of candy? limps over to bar, leaving a trail of Dark & Stormy. And leaving them in the cloud.


Cultist of Jack, Fri, Nov 6, 2009, 05:43 PM

Pour me a dark and Stormy, Reggie. I want to forget about...here.


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 07:06 AM

Hey, c'mon, what's a few stray arrows and shotgun blasts between friends?


Shadow13.com, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 07:36 AM

Cultist of Jack wrote: Come one and all and join the Cult of Jack. Welcome your new overlord and usher in the rise of the new Jack age. I've always liked Callous Jack, but might this be too much of a good thing?


lynora-Jill, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 09:26 AM

Shadow13.com wrote: Cultist of Jack wrote: Come one and all and join the Cult of Jack. Welcome your new overlord and usher in the rise of the new Jack age. I've always liked Callous Jack, but might this be too much of a good thing? Sweetie, you have no idea. ;)


Jack Hammer, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 10:27 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Hey, c'mon, what's a few stray arrows and shotgun blasts between friends? Shotgun? Did someone mention shotguns? shotguns 3 Dark & Stormys Now that's a shotgun! hic


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 10:32 AM

lynora-Jill wrote: Shadow13.com wrote: Cultist of Jack wrote: Come one and all and join the Cult of Jack. Welcome your new overlord and usher in the rise of the new Jack age. I've always liked Callous Jack, but might this be too much of a good thing? Sweetie, you have no idea. ;) What lynora-Jill is trying to say is, "Of course not, silly!"


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 10:34 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Hey, c'mon, what's a few stray arrows and shotgun blasts between friends? Shotgun? Did someone mention shotguns? shotguns 3 Dark & Stormys Now that's a shotgun! hic Perhaps having target practice near the bar is not such a good idea...


Jack Hammer, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 10:37 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Hey, c'mon, what's a few stray arrows and shotgun blasts between friends? Shotgun? Did someone mention shotguns? shotguns 3 Dark & Stormys Now that's a shotgun! hic Perhaps having target practice near the bar is not such a good idea... Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better?


Devlyn, Jack o' Nine Dales, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 10:40 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Hey, c'mon, what's a few stray arrows and shotgun blasts between friends? Shotgun? Did someone mention shotguns? shotguns 3 Dark & Stormys Now that's a shotgun! hic Perhaps having target practice near the bar is not such a good idea... "Agreed. We must think of the Dark & Stormys..." ;)


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 10:42 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction!


Jack Hammer, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 12:14 PM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction! hic Did I get some on your leg? Sorry. hic


Frat Jack, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 12:28 PM

lynora-Jill wrote: Shadow13.com wrote: Cultist of Jack wrote: Come one and all and join the Cult of Jack. Welcome your new overlord and usher in the rise of the new Jack age. I've always liked Callous Jack, but might this be too much of a good thing? Sweetie, you have no idea. ;) And it always goes better if you add a Lynora to it :) Hey, save me some kobold!


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 01:40 PM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction! hic Did I get some on your leg? Sorry. hic Blam


Jack Hammer, Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 01:53 PM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction! hic Did I get some on your leg? Sorry. hic Blam Owww........ hic


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Tue, Nov 10, 2009, 01:57 PM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction! hic Did I get some on your leg? Sorry. hic Blam Owww........ hic Sorry, I was aiming for Fratjack.


Jack Hammer, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 07:42 AM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction! hic Did I get some on your leg? Sorry. hic Blam Owww........ hic Sorry, I was aiming for Fratjack. Sure thing, Mr. Cheney. How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? With a cherry on top? Don't worry about the sparkling fuse...err...sparkler.


Callous Jack (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber), Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 09:44 AM

Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction! hic Did I get some on your leg? Sorry. hic Blam Owww........ hic Sorry, I was aiming for Fratjack. Sure thing, Mr. Cheney. How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? With a cherry on top? Don't worry about the sparkling fuse...err...sparkler. Say, why does that sparkler look like a stick of dynamite?


Jack Hammer, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 12:48 PM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Boobs, booze and gun barrels. What could be better? You're not even aiming in the right direction! hic Did I get some on your leg? Sorry. hic Blam Owww........ hic Sorry, I was aiming for Fratjack. Sure thing, Mr. Cheney. How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? With a cherry on top? Don't worry about the sparkling fuse...err...sparkler. Say, why does that sparkler look like a stick of dynamite? It's just for decoration. Gives the drink a little extra kick. inches away slowly, heading behind the recently reinforced bar


Wolfie, KC's #2 Buddy, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 08:24 PM

Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Sure thing, Mr. Cheney. How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? With a cherry on top? Don't worry about the sparkling fuse...err...sparkler. Say, why does that sparkler look like a stick of dynamite? Oooo, an Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator! I thought they stopped making those?


Jack Hammer, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 08:34 PM

Wolfie, KC's #2 Buddy wrote: Callous Jack wrote: Jack Hammer wrote: Sure thing, Mr. Cheney. How 'bout a Dark & Stormy? With a cherry on top? Don't worry about the sparkling fuse...err...sparkler. Say, why does that sparkler look like a stick of dynamite? Oooo, an Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator! I thought they stopped making those? I found it under the bar. That guy Marvin from the work crew must have left it behind accidentally.


Wolfie, KC's #2 Buddy, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 08:40 PM

Jack Hammer wrote: Wolfie, KC's #2 Buddy wrote: Oooo, an Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator! I thought they stopped making those? I found it under the bar. That guy Marvin from the work crew must have left it behind accidentally. Oooooooooooo, pretty... {creeps closer to IQ36SM}


Jack Hammer, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 08:44 PM

Pulls out 'toy gun' left under bar. "Hey, he musta left this behind too." Aims toy gun at CJ's autographed Joe Montana football on the bookshelf, and squeezes the trigger. A crackling beam of lightning disintegrates the football. "Oops!" hides gun under a towel


Marvin the Martian, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 08:50 PM

A strange little man walks into the Clubhouse. 'Excuse me. Has anyone found my Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator? It's my last one.'


Jack's Right Hand Man, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 09:08 PM

Marvin the Martian wrote: A strange little man walks into the Clubhouse. 'Excuse me. Has anyone found my Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator? It's my last one.' Yeah, I saw it over at the Poodle's Clubhouse.


Jack's Right Hand Man, Wed, Nov 11, 2009, 09:18 PM

Jack Hammer wrote: Pulls out 'toy gun' left under bar. "Hey, he musta left this behind too." Aims toy gun at CJ's autographed Joe Montana football on the bookshelf, and squeezes the trigger. A crackling beam of lightning disintegrates the football. "Oops!" hides gun under a towel That was way too cool. When you're done I'd like to play with it. I'm going to try it on the poodles.


Marvin the Martian, Thu, Nov 12, 2009, 05:32 AM

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote: Marvin the Martian wrote: A strange little man walks into the Clubhouse. 'Excuse me. Has anyone found my Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator? It's my last one.' Yeah, I saw it over at the Poodle's Clubhouse. Goes to leave but spots the lit Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator is CJ's drink "Oh my." He walks over and snuffs out the lit wick and removes the Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator from the drink. "Thank you, sir. This would have been bad if it went off. Now I can get back to my work. We have a demolition job on a planet called Earth." He walks out.


Jack Hammer, Thu, Nov 12, 2009, 05:33 AM

"I thought it was a cherry bomb! How would I know?"