Comes out for behind the pit grill weilding tongs and a spatula.

Any of you lazy critters bagged me a hippeh yet? Ah'm gettin' hongry.

Ah got one a whahl back. It's jes bin rahpenin' up on the porch.

Wail yew ain't even skinned the Birkenstocks and hemp clothing off him Wingding! Not to mention his patchouli crust. Yew get his carcass all dressed up an' I'll make us a Thanksgivin' feast to remember!

Yew shor does cook good vittles Mammy!

Ayup.

Ayup.

Wull git this hippeh readeh fer Thanksgivin' supper Ah tell you whut.

Ah wunder if'n ol'Valegrim's gonna stop by fer Thanksgivin supper.

Who's boiling and mashing the turnips? Cain't have no roast hippeh and stuffin' without mashed turnips! It ain't proper!

Who's boiling and mashing the turnips? Cain't have no roast hippeh and stuffin' without mashed turnips! It ain't proper!

Well you's the onleh wimmen we got, Mammeh.

Well you's the onleh wimmen we got, Mammeh.

Comes out with clenched hamlike hands perched on her generous side fat rolls

Laws above Wingding, I ain't got six arms! That's my cousin Slisabeth from down Pazuzuville way.

One a you lazy porch loafers is a gonna hafta git me some turnips mashed, or I's a mind to serve you tofu instead of hippeh!

Stomps back out back grumbling, muumuu swishing in agitation

Dagnabbit.

*starts cutting up turnips*

Ayup.

These is mitey fine turnips.

Ayup.

Ah reckon so.

*from beneath the porch*

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR...

Comes out from the pit grill, bearing a platter with a well-seasoned hippeh on it

Happeh Thanksgivin' boys!

Plunks the platter on the big cable spool set on the porch.

Dig in!

Ah tell you whut, Mammeh, you outdid yersef with this hippeh. Deeeeeelicious.

Ayup.

*something under the porch yoinks a wing and a dinner roll*

*scarf munch slobber gulp*

Looks at the porch

That thar doohickey undah the porch done made off with some off our roast hippeh!

GWARFFF!!

*munch nom chomp burp*

We gots a varmint whats under the porch!

Where's mah shotgun?

*kicks out hippeh bone and waits for someone to throw it*

Ah reckon we got us sum kinda canuhbull hippeh under thuh porch. Mebbe we awtuh git thuh dogs tuh flush'em out.

Ah reckon we got us sum kinda canuhbull hippeh under thuh porch. Mebbe we awtuh git thuh dogs tuh flush'em out.

Ur Ah jis start shootin down thar 'n see whut comes out.

Ah reckon we got us sum kinda canuhbull hippeh under thuh porch. Mebbe we awtuh git thuh dogs tuh flush'em out.

WARF?

Naow, doncha get all trigger happy an' shoot up the porch thar. Lemme try summat.

Picks up hippeh bone and hurls it into the yard where it bounces among the various autos on cinderblocks

Go gettit doohickey! C'mon boy! Fetch!

Goddang canuhbull hippehs.

<Chases after the hippeh bone>

Ah gots it! Ah gots it!

Naow, doncha get all trigger happy an' shoot up the porch thar. Lemme try summat.

Picks up hippeh bone and hurls it into the yard where it bounces among the various autos on cinderblocks

Go gettit doohickey! C'mon boy! Fetch!

*bolts out to chase*

<Chases after the hippeh bone>

Ah gots it! Ah gots it!

*bowls over the badger, yapping and snarling and all other matter of sorta-doggy playfulness before rolling over for a bellyrub*

Awww, him's cute as a button. Kin we keep him, Mammy?

Hmm, lemme git a gander at that thar doohickey ...

Takes a closer look at the beast

Why Laws above, that thar's a Backholler Blue Tick Grue! I wonder where he wandered in from. They's good hippeh huntin' beasts, I'm sure we can find enough patchouli grazers to keep him fed.

Yew shor he ain't no hippeh Mammy?

*gnaws on zombeh's leg, then runs off and buries it*

See Mammy! Ah telled ya'll he wuz uh dang hippeh. Ain't but wunna them hippeh folk'd try tuh run off with muh leg.

Aww, that's a Blue Tick Grue, sho'nuff. He's jest hongry, and you do smell a bit gamey ...

Whats wrong with a little Hippy now and then?

If'n he's a'right wit' you, Mammy, I spose I'll give him some of this what I was savin' fer later.

<Opens up a cooler. A cloud of flies pours out>

Pee Yew! It shore is ripe.

Ah reckon he's OK, but if'n he tries tuh take muh leg uhgin, ah'm gonna git ol' Uncle Cosmo tuh skin thuh littel bastard.

Whats wrong with a little Hippy now and then?

You trahin' ta start suppum?

Seems lahk it. Goddang hippeh.

Whar'd evybuddy go?

I'm here, I was just looking at this here grue. C'mere boy! Who's a good grue ...who's a handsome grue! You are!

Scratches behind Grue's ears

Ayup.

Ah wuz afred them dang hippehs mytah got ya'll doped up on drugs er sumthin.

*lounges on the porch accepting scratchings and keeping eye and nose out for the smell of hippehsmoke*

Crimson Jester wrote:

Whats wrong with a little Hippy now and then?

You trahin' ta start suppum?

YA u doin'sumptin aboot it?

YA u doin'sumptin aboot it?

Weel, time to see how good a grue we'uns got on our hands here.

OK boy! Go git that thar mime hippeh! Go gettim!

Chambers a shotgun round into Sarajuana

You best git to steppin' hippeh! I's done run out of Thanksgiving leftovers!

Crimson Jester wrote:

YA u doin'sumptin aboot it?

Weel, time to see how good a grue we'uns got on our hands here.

OK boy! Go git that thar mime hippeh! Go gettim!

Chambers a shotgun round into Sarajuana

You best git to steppin' hippeh! I's done run out of Thanksgiving leftovers!

Ah tell you whut. Wull show thet feller how weh treat hippehs roun' here.