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DSXMachina, Fri, Jul 17, 2009, 05:43 PM

"I have my car outside, we could cruise around and hunt them down. See what mischief they have got up to?"

*spins key to his car around finger, while staggering towards the bar*

Jack Hammer, Fri, Jul 17, 2009, 06:25 PM

lynora-Jill wrote:

Downs a margarita.

I...don't feel so good. I don't suppose anyone prepared neutralize poison today? Oh dear. Colors are definitely not supposed to do that.

Maybe you should sit down?

leads LJ to a couch

Not that inoccent., Fri, Jul 17, 2009, 07:10 PM

Celestial Follower wrote:

Come one, come all, to the thread celestial!

We welcome all celestial beings and objects. Heck, we'll even allow things infernal (if they don't mind a cudgel hit or two), neutral (slaads), or neutered (poodles). Jacks can come over too, as long as there is no punting. No dretchings, please.

Plus, FREE TURNIPS.

Now we can just sit back and wait.

But I hate turnips.

Leaf Ericson, Fri, Jul 17, 2009, 07:23 PM

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery, Fri, Jul 17, 2009, 10:00 PM

Leaf Ericson wrote:

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

...or on a brainbending substance

{wanders behind the bar, no one seems to object} Here ya go Leafy... {slids him an Irish Eyes} ...just don't start singing that song.

lynora-Jill, Fri, Jul 17, 2009, 10:05 PM

Jack Hammer wrote:

lynora-Jill wrote:

Downs a margarita.

I...don't feel so good. I don't suppose anyone prepared neutralize poison today? Oh dear. Colors are definitely not supposed to do that.

Maybe you should sit down?

leads LJ to a couch

"Yeah, sitting down would be good. Wow. The world went all bendy. This is definitely not good."

Db3's Astral Projection, Fri, Jul 17, 2009, 10:32 PM

DSXMachina wrote:

"I have my car outside, we could cruise around and hunt them down. See what mischief they have got up to?"

*spins key to his car around finger, while staggering towards the bar*

*Shimmers into view*
They are at the Slaad Thread. Prepare yourselves, for they may be chased by slaadi here...

Hello Lynora-jill. You should probably start to check your drinks for 'extras'.

lynora-Jill, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 12:29 AM

Db3's Astral Projection wrote:

DSXMachina wrote:

"I have my car outside, we could cruise around and hunt them down. See what mischief they have got up to?"

*spins key to his car around finger, while staggering towards the bar*

*Shimmers into view*
They are at the Slaad Thread. Prepare yourselves, for they may be chased by slaadi here...

Hello Lynora-jill. You should probably start to check your drinks for 'extras'.

This is so weird. I've never actually seen sound before. It's making me kind of nauseous.

Evil Monkey, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 05:42 AM

The big leisure-suited monkey is getting uproariously drunk. His fiendish dryad and nymph friends are also well on their way, and have decided to quit giving out the death stares to Missy and Mandy and join the bacchanal on the dance floor. Much rubbing and gyrating ensues

Celestial Healer, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 08:19 AM

I started with a cult and ended up with a rave. How odd.

Leaf Ericson, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 08:38 AM

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

...or on a brainbending substance

{wanders behind the bar, no one seems to object} Here ya go Leafy... {slids him an Irish Eyes} ...just don't start singing that song.

*Hic*

That's good stuff barkeep! Now I'm going to get my plant brethren to infiltrate...freshen this place up.

By the way, what's with the Pit Fiend bouncers?

Abyssal Healer, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 08:54 AM

Leaf Ericson wrote:

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

...or on a brainbending substance

{wanders behind the bar, no one seems to object} Here ya go Leafy... {slids him an Irish Eyes} ...just don't start singing that song.

*Hic*

That's good stuff barkeep! Now I'm going to get my plant brethren to infiltrate...freshen this place up.

By the way, what's with the Pit Fiend bouncers?

I'm a balor, thank you very much. You just love lumping all fiends into one category, don't you?

Leaf Ericson, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 09:03 AM

Abyssal Healer wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

...or on a brainbending substance

{wanders behind the bar, no one seems to object} Here ya go Leafy... {slids him an Irish Eyes} ...just don't start singing that song.

*Hic*

That's good stuff barkeep! Now I'm going to get my plant brethren to infiltrate...freshen this place up.

By the way, what's with the Pit Fiend bouncers?

I'm a balor, thank you very much. You just love lumping all fiends into one category, don't you?

It could be the blurred vision brought on by this wonderful drink, *hic*, but, no, you've really got Pit Fiend bouncers. I can tell the difference, you know?

Sytt, Lesser Yugoloth, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 09:12 AM

Abyssal Healer wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

...or on a brainbending substance

{wanders behind the bar, no one seems to object} Here ya go Leafy... {slids him an Irish Eyes} ...just don't start singing that song.

*Hic*

That's good stuff barkeep! Now I'm going to get my plant brethren to infiltrate...freshen this place up.

By the way, what's with the Pit Fiend bouncers?

I'm a balor, thank you very much. You just love lumping all fiends into one category, don't you?

Ew! It's a demon!
/\Actually, that's Orcus.

Abyssal Healer, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 09:53 AM

Sytt, Lesser Yugoloth wrote:

Abyssal Healer wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

...or on a brainbending substance

{wanders behind the bar, no one seems to object} Here ya go Leafy... {slids him an Irish Eyes} ...just don't start singing that song.

*Hic*

That's good stuff barkeep! Now I'm going to get my plant brethren to infiltrate...freshen this place up.

By the way, what's with the Pit Fiend bouncers?

I'm a balor, thank you very much. You just love lumping all fiends into one category, don't you?

Ew! It's a demon!
/\Actually, that's Orcus.

It was the closest thing there was to a balor.

Ew! It's a yugoloth!

Jack Hammer, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 04:27 PM

after making sure LJ is back safely from her trip, JH excuses himself and heads out

Leaf Ericson, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 06:14 PM

Can I get another one of those Irish Eyes, barkeep?

Little Caesar Dretching, Sat, Jul 18, 2009, 07:59 PM

Celestial Healer wrote:

El-Lina Solareil wrote:

cozies up alongside Celestial Healer

"I'm dead. Will that be a problem? I'm so cold. I need someone to warm me up."

*turns undead*

Genius! Now she won't try to snuggle for warmth, cause you're undead!

I'm actually dead too, and slaadi don't have any after-life deal... but I guess a deity interceded on my behalf.

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 05:52 AM

Leaf Ericson wrote:

It could be the blurred vision brought on by this wonderful drink, *hic*, but, no, you've really got Pit Fiend bouncers. I can tell the difference, you know?

Can I get another one of those Irish Eyes, barkeep?

*Lightweight. That drink isn't strong enough to strip the paint off my golem ass. Oh well, give 'em what they want.* {slides another drink to the leafy fellow}

Little Caesar Dretching wrote:

I'm actually dead too, and slaadi don't have any after-life deal... but I guess a deity interceded on my behalf.

{ponders telling the dretching of the All-Spark splinter embedded in his forehead, but thinks better of it.} Here little guy, have a White Russian. It was recommended by The Dude over at the end of the bar.

The Dude Lebowski, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 08:26 AM

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery wrote:

Here little guy, have a White Russian. It was recommended by The Dude over at the end of the bar.

Hey buddy, a weird frozen spider-poodle head thingie just appeared in the ice machine behind you.

Oh, could I get another White Russian... with no ice please.

Leaf Ericson, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 09:35 AM

If I had the means to do it, I'd be sick right now. *hic*

Gimme another a dem Irish Eyes, barkeep! NO ice for me either.

Cobb Slaad, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 09:38 AM

Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss!

HISS!!!

Sytt, Lesser Yugoloth, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 12:17 PM

Abyssal Healer wrote:

Sytt, Lesser Yugoloth wrote:

Abyssal Healer wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

Jack J. Jackson, Beer Delivery wrote:

Leaf Ericson wrote:

What do I have to do to get a drink around here? Fill the air with toxins and blow around menacingly in the wind?

Rifftrax is definitely the best way to watch "The Happening" by the way.

...or on a brainbending substance

{wanders behind the bar, no one seems to object} Here ya go Leafy... {slids him an Irish Eyes} ...just don't start singing that song.

*Hic*

That's good stuff barkeep! Now I'm going to get my plant brethren to infiltrate...freshen this place up.

By the way, what's with the Pit Fiend bouncers?

I'm a balor, thank you very much. You just love lumping all fiends into one category, don't you?

Ew! It's a demon!
/\Actually, that's Orcus.

It was the closest thing there was to a balor.

Ew! It's a yugoloth!

Ew! It's a...um...something really stupid.
...
Obyriths were better.

Celestial Healer, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 06:44 PM

Have the go-go dancers arrived yet?

Gark the Goblin, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 07:37 PM

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Angel Fish wrote:

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Angel Fish wrote:

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Warforged Jack wrote:

Celestial Healer wrote:

Celestial Follower! Get some more liquor. And maybe some nachos and cocktail weenies. I'll never attract a big cult without liquor, nachos, and cocktail weenies.

All right! Almost like the Jack's Clubhouse!

We may have to assimilate this cult.

Don' m'k me shm'te ya...

Cool, a talking tuna!

That'sh 't...shmite!
*Lightning bolt strikes JRHM*

*laughs at the little one volt jolt the fish gives* Man, this fish has some serious delusions.

Um... I think electricity just heals golems.

Fruit Slaad, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 07:38 PM

Azhagal wrote:

FREE MUFFINS!!!!!!!

little do they know, the end is nigh, Vomit Guy's resurrection will be upon us soon! mehehehhhhh......

Little does he know that the muffins are implanted with eggs...

L. G. G., C. o. t. 101st G.A.R., Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 07:59 PM

Drew & Stew Jackman wrote:

{tumble in through the doors, already pretty sloshed}

Drew: Hey, has anyone seen our older brother, Hugh? He's got some new Wolf-R-Reem thingie he has to start casting for, but the producers can't find him

Stew: Forget him for now -- babes and brewskis are everywhere! It's like heaven in here!

Celestial Follower wrote:

<Drops magic marker into Angel Fish's bowl>

Angel Fish wrote:

AIII!! *Cough cough cough* Can't...breathe...through poison...

Drew: That's handy. {fishes magic marker out} Thanks Fishie! Gonna need this to write down some sheilas' phone numbers.

Mr. Jackman is on the run from the law. If you see him, you are legally obligated to turn him in or face charges of conspiracy and obstruction of justice, which carry execution penalties.

Angel Fish, Sun, Jul 19, 2009, 08:50 PM

Gark the Goblin wrote:

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Angel Fish wrote:

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Angel Fish wrote:

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Warforged Jack wrote:

Celestial Healer wrote:

Celestial Follower! Get some more liquor. And maybe some nachos and cocktail weenies. I'll never attract a big cult without liquor, nachos, and cocktail weenies.

All right! Almost like the Jack's Clubhouse!

We may have to assimilate this cult.

Don' m'k me shm'te ya...

Cool, a talking tuna!

That'sh 't...shmite!
*Lightning bolt strikes JRHM*

*laughs at the little one volt jolt the fish gives* Man, this fish has some serious delusions.

Um... I think electricity just heals golems.

Nah, only some types of golems. Jacks are just highly resistant.
Also, I think you mean the Jackmen are on the run from your crazy women. If I weren't busy guarding this place, I'd look into consecrating your country.

The Dude Lebowski, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 06:03 AM

Cobb Slaad wrote:

<The pieces of the poodle head thaw, and each sprouts a set of spider legs. The pieces crawl towards each other.>

Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss! Hiss!

<The poodle-head slaad thing reforms completely, and it sprays twin streams of acid at random patrons in the thread.>

HISS!!!

<It then scuttles out of the thread.>

Whoa, I think I'm having some weird Cohen Bros flashback.

Celestial Healer, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 06:40 AM

I'm still kinda hung up on internet domination. Do you think maybe we could "convert" everyone to celestialism through the careful deployment of charismatic televangelists?

Demi-Lich H. Ross Perot, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 06:44 AM

Celestial Healer wrote:

I'm still kinda hung up on internet domination. Do you think maybe we could "convert" everyone to celestialism through the careful deployment of charismatic televangelists?

That'd be annoying and probably hurt you in the polls. It'd be better to just kill 'em and Raise 'em with the Celestial template. {goes back to sipping Mint Julep through straw}

Demi-Lich H. Ross Perot, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 09:00 AM

Demi-Lich H. Ross Perot wrote:

{goes back to sipping Mint Julep through straw}

Barkeepish purshon, cooould I haf annynodder... {passes out, rolls off counter, and falls into open bowling ball bag on floor}

Celestial Healer, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 09:57 AM

Demi-Lich H. Ross Perot wrote:

Demi-Lich H. Ross Perot wrote:

{goes back to sipping Mint Julep through straw}

Barkeepish purshon, cooould I haf annynodder... {passes out, rolls off counter, and falls into open bowling ball bag on floor}

He fell faster than his presidential campaign...

The Dude Lebowski, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 10:43 AM

Celestial Healer wrote:

He fell faster than his presidential campaign...

Thanks barkeep, funky winged guy... *I wonder if he poses for van art?* I gotta go. Time to meet Donny and Walter for bowling. {zips up bowling bag, heads for the door}

Celestial Healer, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 12:58 PM

Where did my Celestial Follower go? Is he still gallivanting in that stolen hellcop car? We're almost out of pizza rolls.

Priestess of Discord, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 01:03 PM

Celestial Healer wrote:

Where did my Celestial Follower go? Is he still gallivanting in that stolen hellcop car? We're almost out of pizza rolls.

If you run out of food, you may run out of followers. Of course, some of your guests may prefer to devour souls...not me, of course. Play with my food, maybe...

Celestial Follower, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 02:20 PM

Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo!

Hooray! We're back! That side trip to Ry'leh, North Carolina was pretty rough.

I managed to get some snacks!

These cop cars sure do have a lot of trunk space. Here's some pizza rolls, margarita mix, 300 bottles of liquor...I've been told to try the King in Yellow Tequila, nachos, Red Baron pizzas, all kinds of different Doritos...including Spicy Soul Sucking Doritos, pretzels...

Dr. Jan Jansen III, Turnip King, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 02:29 PM

Celestial Follower wrote:

<Infernal cop car pops in>

Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo!

{Climbs down off hood, still shaking} Note to self: No more psychedelic mushrooms. Ever. {pukes over in the corner}

Priestess of Discord, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:12 PM

Celestial Follower wrote:

<Infernal cop car pops in>

Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo!

<Tentacles grab random patrons>

Hooray! We're back! That side trip to Ry'leh, North Carolina was pretty rough.

I managed to get some snacks!

<Opens the trunk and reaches into an impossibly-large maw>

These cop cars sure do have a lot of trunk space. Here's some pizza rolls, margarita mix, 300 bottles of liquor...I've been told to try the King in Yellow Tequila, nachos, Red Baron pizzas, all kinds of different Doritos...including Spicy Soul Sucking Doritos, pretzels...

yummm...Spicy Soul Sucking Doritos, my favorite. Err..I mean I should try them...for the 1st time. Ever.

DSXMachina, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:17 PM

Celestial Follower wrote:

<Infernal cop car pops in>

Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo!

<Tentacles grab random patrons>

Hooray! We're back! That side trip to Ry'leh, North Carolina was pretty rough.

I managed to get some snacks!

<Opens the trunk and reaches into an impossibly-large maw>

These cop cars sure do have a lot of trunk space. Here's some pizza rolls, margarita mix, 300 bottles of liquor...I've been told to try the King in Yellow Tequila, nachos, Red Baron pizzas, all kinds of different Doritos...including Spicy Soul Sucking Doritos, pretzels...

"Oh nice, you have brought back lots of crisps that need to be dunked in red gooey liquid, how outer-planar. And most importantly liquor, groovy.!"

Dr. Jan Jansen III, Turnip King, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:26 PM

DSXMachina wrote:

"Oh nice, you have brought back lots of crisps that need to be dunked in red gooey liquid, how outer-planar. And most importantly liquor, groovy.!"

Hmmm. Celestial Healer, can use your celestial sight on this 'un? Ah think we mites haf oursels ah hippeh furriner hayr!!!

DSXMachina, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:36 PM

Dr. Jan Jansen III, Turnip King wrote:

DSXMachina wrote:

"Oh nice, you have brought back lots of crisps that need to be dunked in red gooey liquid, how outer-planar. And most importantly liquor, groovy.!"

Hmmm. Celestial Healer, can use your celestial sight on this 'un? Ah think we mites haf oursels ah hippeh furriner hayr!!!

"No dear doctor, i am quite familiar with the celestial realms, but of course i am not from the colonies like some. Your name indicates germanic decent?"

Dr. Jan Jansen III, Turnip King, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:45 PM

DSXMachina wrote:

No dear doctor, i am quite familiar with the ceelestial realms, but of course i am not from the colonies like some. Your name indicates germanic decent?"

{grumbles} Hippehs is well known ta be up ahn da fancy book-lernin. Ah aints convinced.

"Germanic?" Nope, from Athkatla, in Amn. I'd just hopped a Gate from Toril to Sigil, when I spotted Celestial Follower buying a couple crates of turnips. My pappy always told me to trust a man that knows how to buy a good turnip, so I followed him here.

Or at least, that's how I remember it. I can't guarantee anything... other than I haven't been sober in over 7 years.

DSXMachina, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:48 PM

"Good job, dear chap on that lack of sobriety very commmendable. Would you happen to help me get in such an inerbriated state?"

*passes over a beer*

"Bottoms up."

*takes a long draft on his bottle*

Evil Monkey, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:52 PM

I'll drink to that!

Evil Monkey throws down another scotch

Dr. Jan Jansen III, Turnip King, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 03:57 PM

DSXMachina wrote:

"Good job, dear chap on that lack of sobriety very commmendable. Would you happen to help me get in such an inerbriated state?"

Here you go- {passes over walnut-sized lump of an unknown substance with over a dozen different types of pills mashed into it's surface} you should like it. It's 'Tussin-flavored too.

DSXMachina wrote:

*passes over a beer*

"Bottoms up."

{empties beer into mug, then drops a shot glass of Ol' Janx Spirit into it} Yummy! {slams it down}

DSXMachina, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 04:05 PM

*examines the strange pill ball*

"Multi-coloured, interesting"

*swallows pill, takes a pull of his ale, and with a florid bow*

"Any of you ladies want to dance?"

Celestial Healer, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 04:07 PM

Mmm, pizza rolls!

DSXMachina, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 04:22 PM

"Just realised it's been awhile since i've had any fruit or veg., is there any here? well apart from this pommie/limey/old fruit"

"Oh yes the turnips. Any still about?"

Celestial Follower, Mon, Jul 20, 2009, 04:30 PM

DSXMachina wrote:

"Just realised it's been awhile since i've had any fruit or veg., is there any here? well apart from this pommie/limey/old fruit"

"Oh yes the turnips. Any still about?"

It's weird, the pit *cough* balors really liked the turnips, so we're all out.