paizo.com - Paizo / Messageboards / Paizo Community / Off-Topic Discussions / The Slaad Thread

Egg Slaad, Fri, Jun 5, 2009, 08:25 PM

Ranch Dretching wrote:

Fruit Slaad wrote:

I think this thread needs to be cleansed of puns... phunnigated.

How about another joke?

Why did the tomato turn red?

** spoiler omitted **

LOL! This a funny as Chaos dretch!

Go wild, Ranchy, go wild!

By the by, did you have anything to do with the ancient Greeks associating celery with the death cult and death in general?

Fruit Slaad, Fri, Jun 5, 2009, 10:28 PM

Egg Slaad wrote:

Ranch Dretching wrote:

Fruit Slaad wrote:

I think this thread needs to be cleansed of puns... phunnigated.

How about another joke?

Why did the tomato turn red?

** spoiler omitted **

LOL! This a funny as Chaos dretch!

<hands the dretch an entire bunch of celery>

Go wild, Ranchy, go wild!

By the by, did you have anything to do with the ancient Greeks associating celery with the death cult and death in general?

I think that would have to be tomatoes.
Plus, of course, the cosmology on Earth is different than core D&D/PF, so there probably weren't any dretches.

Sytt, Lesser Yugoloth, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 09:18 AM

*Facepalm*
Leave the ravid alone, he's able to animate one object per round. Totally overpowered. You probably shouldn't mess with him.

Egg Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 09:28 AM

Fruit Slaad wrote:

Egg Slaad wrote:

By the by, did you have anything to do with the ancient Greeks associating celery with the death cult and death in general?

I think that would have to be tomatoes.

Plus, of course, the cosmology on Earth is different than core D&D/PF, so there probably weren't any dretches.

Ah, but the connections to the Prime Material Plane occur on countless worlds, so who knows.

Nope, celery ... check the section for Cultural Depictions. The tomato, while certainly a member of the nightshade family, is a New World plant and would not have been in ancient Greece.

Ranch Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 10:10 AM

Hey! I taste pretty good!

Yeah. I'm all about the death and the Greeks. There's this Greek Slaad I did in a couple of days ago. I couldn't stand the screaming though.

Tossed Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 10:58 AM

We should branch out and slaughter the people in another thread. I'm not sure which one we should target...

Ranch Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 11:06 AM

Tossed Slaad wrote:

We should branch out and slaughter the people in another thread. I'm not sure which one we should target...

Abaddon! Abaddon! Abaddon!

Fruit Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 12:27 PM

Ranch Dretching wrote:

<Stabs self with celery, then takes a bite>

Hey! I taste pretty good!

Yeah. I'm all about the death and the Greeks. There's this Greek Slaad I did in a couple of days ago. I couldn't stand the screaming though.

Wasn't that the slaad Cobb was talking about?:

Cobb Slaad wrote:

I've got my eye on a cute Greek Slaad. She is hot.

Egg Slaad wrote:

Fruit Slaad wrote:

Egg Slaad wrote:

By the by, did you have anything to do with the ancient Greeks associating celery with the death cult and death in general?

I think that would have to be tomatoes.

Plus, of course, the cosmology on Earth is different than core D&D/PF, so there probably weren't any dretches.

Ah, but the connections to the Prime Material Plane occur on countless worlds, so who knows.

Yes, but I think the cosmology is different for each planet, and the farther away from each other the less planar connections. Plus, of course, Earth is pretty much magic-dead and we've only got monotheistic gods (who fade, instead of dying, as faith fails).

Egg Slaad wrote:

Nope, celery ... check the section for Cultural Depictions. The tomato, while certainly a member of the nightshade family, is a New World plant and would not have been in ancient Greece.

Yeah, I knew that, but its relatives were in Greece (belladonna, nightshade), and I know they were commonly used in Germanic witchcraft. Plus, of course, celery was eaten by the Wonder Pets (whatever they were). There's some cultural depictions for you.

Jack's Right Hand Man, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 12:34 PM

Tossed Slaad wrote:

We should branch out and slaughter the people in another thread. I'm not sure which one we should target...

You would do well not to cross paths with the Jacks.

Cobb Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 12:36 PM

Fruit Slaad wrote:

Ranch Dretching wrote:

<Stabs self with celery, then takes a bite>

Hey! I taste pretty good!

Yeah. I'm all about the death and the Greeks. There's this Greek Slaad I did in a couple of days ago. I couldn't stand the screaming though.

Wasn't that the slaad Cobb was talking about?:

Cobb Slaad wrote:

I've got my eye on a cute Greek Slaad. She is hot.

Wait, what? Not Alexis! It couldn't be my Alexis!

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Ranch Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 12:37 PM

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Tossed Slaad wrote:

We should branch out and slaughter the people in another thread. I'm not sure which one we should target...

You would do well not to cross paths with the Jacks.

You look like you need some Ranch Dretching!

Ranch Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 12:42 PM

Why...can't...I...stab...you?

What's with Anakin Slaad over there?

Potato Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 01:02 PM

Today would have been a great day for a picnic, but I had to go help a friend move.

Snickers Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 01:03 PM

We must attack the poodles. They pee on everything and all that sodium just speeds up the wilting process. And Ranch Dretching do you have a friend named French one of the poodles has a severe complex with anything associated with the french name/culture/language.

Clinically Depressed Poodle, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 01:04 PM

Snickers Slaad wrote:

We must attack the poodles. They pee on everything and all that sodium just speeds up the wilting process. And Ranch Dretching do you have a friend named French one of the poodles has a severe complex with anything associated with the french name/culture/language.

*Runs in and pees on Snickers Slaad, then runs out to look for french people to maul.*

Jack's Right Hand Man, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 01:11 PM

Ranch Dretching wrote:

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

Tossed Slaad wrote:

We should branch out and slaughter the people in another thread. I'm not sure which one we should target...

You would do well not to cross paths with the Jacks.

<Jumps on Jack's Right Hand Man>

You look like you need some Ranch Dretching!

*thows Ranch Dretching off* Perhaps it would be best for me to get out of here. This place is an asylum! *runs off*

Potato Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 01:16 PM

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

*thows Ranch Dretching off* Perhaps it would be best for me to get out of here. This palace is an asylum! *runs off*

Huzzah! Even the Jacks fear us!

Caesar Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 01:17 PM

Clinically Depressed Poodle wrote:

Snickers Slaad wrote:

We must attack the poodles. They pee on everything and all that sodium just speeds up the wilting process. And Ranch Dretching do you have a friend named French one of the poodles has a severe complex with anything associated with the french name/culture/language.

*Runs in and pees on Snickers Slaad, then runs out to look for french people to maul.*

Caesar! My name is Caesar!! That's Italian not French you dumb-assed poodle.

...

Get off my leg!!

...

Oh, fine. Just don't tell anyone about this.

Fruit Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 02:40 PM

Caesar Slaad wrote:

Caesar! My name is Caesar!! That's Italian not French you dumb-assed poodle.

It's Latin, actually.
Now, Bleu Cheese Slaad is 1/3 french.

Potato Slaad wrote:

Jack's Right Hand Man wrote:

*thows Ranch Dretching off* Perhaps it would be best for me to get out of here. This palace is an asylum! *runs off*

Huzzah! Even the Jacks fear us!

Indeed!
I guess we should go get the poodles then...

Taco Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 04:42 PM

Si! I do not like these poodles. They are not cute like chihuahuas.

Tossed Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 05:55 PM

Fine. First the poodles, then everyone on the word game threads.

Chicken Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 06:22 PM

Tossed Slaad wrote:

Fine. First the poodles, then everyone on the word game threads.

Poodles make me kind of nervous and words just plain scare me ... AHHHH! WORDS!!!!!

Ranch Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 08:02 PM

Awwww! Where'd my unstabable friend go?

Is Anakin Slaad still crying? Sheesh! You'd think someone murdered his girlfriend or something.

Wafu Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 08:11 PM

Konnichiwa!

<-- pokes Ranchy with celery stalk... Omnoomnomnom, ooo, you are tasty!

Slaad-Barr, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 08:19 PM

Potato Slaad wrote:

Huzzah! Even the Jacks fear us!

Way to put the fear of Slaad in them!

Ranch Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 08:21 PM

Wafu Dretching wrote:

Konnichiwa!

<-- pokes Ranchy with celery stalk... Omnoomnomnom, ooo, you are tasty!

Bleccchhhh! That reminds me of the time I had to give that balor a sponge batch--with my tongue.

Slaad-Barr, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 08:34 PM

Dan Qu, er, Potatoe Slaade wrote:

Eieiooooooooo!!!<Dies>

Uncle Potatoe? Oh well, figured it would happen sooner than later.

{checks betting pool} Hmmm, says that some b*t*h named Ambrosia Slaad had him down for June 2nd.

Good thing I'm not a blue slaad, but a green slaad in disguise... POOF!

Ambrosia Slaad, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 08:35 PM

Slaad-Barr wrote:

POOF!

Ahhhh, nice fit! Now it's time to go collect my winnings...

Wafu Dretching, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 08:38 PM

Ranch Dretching wrote:

<Stabs Waffles with stick of celery>

Bleccchhhh! That reminds me of the time I had to give that balor a sponge batch--with my tongue.

Awwww, you say the sweetest things {snuggles up to Ranchy}

Poppyseed Dretch-ing, Sat, Jun 6, 2009, 10:45 PM

Wafu Dretching wrote:

Ranch Dretching wrote:

<Stabs Waffles with stick of celery>

Bleccchhhh! That reminds me of the time I had to give that balor a sponge batch--with my tongue.

Awwww, you say the sweetest things {snuggles up to Ranchy}

Oi! Get a room!

Tossed Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 08:55 AM

Mmm. All these dretchings to choose from.

Wafu Dretching, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 09:29 AM

Poppyseed Dretch-ing wrote:

Oi! Get a room!

{bats eyes coyly, pats seat} OOOO, helloooo nurse! Come sit next to me and Ranchy here. {snorts crushed croutons} Mmmm, there's plenty for you too.

Cobb Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 11:08 AM

Which one of you killed Alexis!?

Wafu Dretching, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 11:44 AM

Cobb Slaad wrote:

Which one of you killed Alexis!?

{whistles innocently, scoots slowly away from Stabby McRanchy, jerks head subtly and repeatedly toward Ranchy...}

Ambrosia Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 11:51 AM

Ol' Unky Potatoe's "tragic" demise paid out a nice bit o' coin.

Hey, where'd the hussy dretching come from?

Ranch Dretching, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 12:09 PM

Occifer, I think this is the guy yer looking for.

Fruit Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 12:26 PM

Wafu Dretching wrote:

Cobb Slaad wrote:

Which one of you killed Alexis!?

{whistles innocently, scoots slowly away from Stabby McRanchy, jerks head subtly and repeatedly toward Ranchy...}

Glances at Mr. Celery in the hand of Ranch...

Potato Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 12:27 PM

Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

Ol' Unky Potatoe's "tragic" demise paid out a nice bit o' coin.

It's about time that poser bought the farm.

Little Caesar Dretching, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 12:31 PM

It wasn't me, I swear! I'm innocent! Takes celery stick, then points it at Ranch. It was him!

Fruit Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 12:33 PM

Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

Ol' Unky Potatoe's "tragic" demise paid out a nice bit o' coin.

Hey, where'd the hussy dretching come from?

Where do other dretches come from? The Abyss, right? Duh. Did you even take Basic Cosmology?

Caesar Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 01:14 PM

Little Caesar Dretching wrote:

It wasn't me, I swear! I'm innocent! Takes celery stick, then points it at Ranch. It was him!

Get away from those other Slaads! We belong together.

Cobb Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 01:34 PM

All you dretchings look the same, yet somehow oddly different. I'm going to have to kill all of you.

Sytt, Lesser Yugoloth, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 03:12 PM

Cobb Slaad wrote:

<Storms over to Wafu and Ranch Dretching>

Which one of you killed Alexis!?

Stupid moron never saw it coming...
*Walks off to Poodle Thread*

Cobb Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 04:27 PM

I'm starting with you Ranch!

Dan Qu, er, Potatoe Slaade, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 04:28 PM

Ime backe!

Cobb Slaad, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 04:28 PM

Oh, cheese!

Little Caesar Dretching, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 04:29 PM

Caesar Slaad wrote:

Little Caesar Dretching wrote:

It wasn't me, I swear! I'm innocent! Takes celery stick, then points it at Ranch. It was him!

Get away from those other Slaads! We belong together.

They were mean to me! sucks on celery stick

Dan Qu, er, Potatoe Slaade, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 04:29 PM

Goota goe. Teh kween iis calleing.

<Bamf!>

Poppyseed Dretch-ing, Sun, Jun 7, 2009, 04:31 PM

Cobb Slaad wrote:

All you dretchings look the same, yet somehow oddly different. I'm going to have to kill all of you.

Oh yeah? Well, we have a 35% percent chance of summoning more dretches! So eat that! rolls d%.... comes up with 36... Crap! waddles off hurriedly