Cops: Fla. man shoved ferret in pants

No, wait, it gets even better.

That confrontation makes the ferret a "special weapon" under Florida law, so Bolton also faces battery charges for dangerously wielding the animal.

Is a ferret an Exotic Weapon?

Oh, cousin Felix, what are you doing now?

Is a ferret an Exotic Weapon?

I think it's a new category entirely.

CourtFool wrote:

Is a ferret an Exotic Weapon?

I think it's a new category entirely.

Are they small so you can dual weild them?

The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:

CourtFool wrote:

Is a ferret an Exotic Weapon?

I think it's a new category entirely.

Are they small so you can dual weild them?

I think they latch onto the neck on a Crit Hit. Also, they work great on the snakelike Yanni-Ti.

Just when you thought people couldn't get ANY more stupid.
I can excuse him for being stupid at 17 but a live animal with sharp teeth and claws IN your pants presumably near the groin.
OH well at least he was on his way to removing his stupiness from the gene pool. Now it's only a matter of time. I think we will be seeing this teen getting a darwin award someday.

I was attacked by a ferret once. When we were kids, my mom did the bookwork for my dad's dry cleaners, and we had to go with her in the summer. We'd always go hang out across the street for a while at a pet store. One day I go in and they have a ferret running loose. As I was standing there, he crawled up to me and tried to bite my leg.

Needless to say, first I kicked the little bastard across the store, then (after I told her what happened) my mom came and ripped the store clerks a new one....

I found my next animal companion.

I found my next animal companion.

What, the stupid kid, or the ferret he traumatized?

Yes.

I'm actually surprised that animal rights activists aren't all over that kid.

I'm actually surprised that animal rights activists aren't all over that kid.

Nobody wants to be all over anyone who walks around with a ferret in their drawers!

True. I guess there are some things even they don't want anything to do with.

Aberzombie wrote:

I'm actually surprised that animal rights activists aren't all over that kid.

Nobody wants to be all over anyone who walks around with a ferret in their drawers!

I wouldn't go that far but he's 17 gotta wait for him to ripen a little bit more. If he likes ferrets then maybe he'll mature into a furbie one day.

"A 17-year-old witness confronted Bolton in the parking lot and was bitten by the animal after the man allegedly shoved it in the teen's face."

I hope it was removed from his pants first. I don't *need* that image.

Are they small so you can dual weild them?

the core rulebook clearly states that you can only deal damage with a ferret if it is wielded in the off-hand.

-Skeld

David Fryer wrote:

Aberzombie wrote:

I'm actually surprised that animal rights activists aren't all over that kid.

Nobody wants to be all over anyone who walks around with a ferret in their drawers!

I wouldn't go that far but he's 17 gotta wait for him to ripen a little bit more. If he likes ferrets then maybe he'll mature into a furbie one day.

Ewwwwwwwwww!

Ever hear of Ferret Legging? It IS an ACTUAL 'sport'.

Ever hear of Ferret Legging? It IS an ACTUAL 'sport'.

Thanks for the post now I have to find out when the next event in richmond is so I can volunteer to help insert or extract the trouser ferrets. That can be fun by itself. Naturally I will want to help check or scratches and such, I think I may have found my new hobby.

When I took my ferret to the vet a few months ago, she was much happier to crawl into my trouser leg and go to sleep then have to deal with all the scary dogs and things. When she's in 'play mode' however, the sensation of ferret-in-pants is a different one entirely:p

I'd never put a ferret i didn't know anywhere on my person, as they can be vicious little things, a friend had the tendon in her hand torn by her bitey little pet. Glad mine's a sweety:D

*and as the moon rises full, our intrepid young man has dreams of hopping about ridiculously in a sideways manner and rooting about in cardboard tubes. He awakens in the morning smelling of cedar chips and musk with bloodstains on his mouth.
"Dear god, what have I done!!"
Rise of the Wereferret, coming soon to a theatre near you!

*and as the moon rises full, our intrepid young man has dreams of hopping about ridiculously in a sideways manner and rooting about in cardboard tubes. He awakens in the morning smelling of cedar chips and musk with bloodstains on his mouth.

"Dear god, what have I done!!"
Rise of the Wereferret, coming soon to a theatre near you!

Gold STAR!!!11elventyone

My cow-orkers now think me completely round the bend insane...thank you...

Ferrets, when properly motivated, make good traps! Especially Dire Ferrets!

*scampers off to properly motivate one...*

Is a ferret an Exotic Weapon?

If you do not have the Exotic Weapon: Ferret proficiency, you may wield it two-handed as a martial weapon. Attempting to wield it one-handed without the feat causes the ferret to act as a cursed back-biting weapon.

Ever hear of Ferret Legging? It IS an ACTUAL 'sport'.

One word. Attach (Ex).