Recent Posts
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Big Mammy Grillz,
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Avast lookie! We got us some roof rabbit fer th' grill! Shiver me timbers! Aims Sarajuana at th' feline
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Aberzombie
(Pathfinder Adventure Path, Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),
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Ah rekkon so. |
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Kruelaid
(Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Chronicles, Pathfinder Companion, Planet Stories Subscriber),
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Whoa!!!! I'll be sorrier than a one ~!%&** eyed gopher in a cactus patch!! WHY??!!! ~&&*~*#!!!! |
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Kobold Cleaver,
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OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight! SMURF!!! Curse you, you psychotic hag! CURSE YOU!!! |
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Mrs. Lichman,
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Nuthin's over. Thet bimbo's neveh gonna git muh Larry. *places phone call to Sebastian's Father* |
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The Witch Hunter General,
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OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight! Hmmm. If I undewstand cowrectly, Kobowd Cleavew, you seem to be twying to hex de mothew of one of de most mewciless and black-heawted lawyews on de Paizo Messageboawds? |
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Mrs. Lichman,
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OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight! Mebbe so, but thet husseh shalt be also a witch! Let's see whut kinda witch hunter yeh art. |
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Larry Lichman
(Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),
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Yew tell'im, hunny! Scheisse!! |
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Mrs. Lichman,
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Lawreh, yew git home! Yew've cawsed enuff twubble! |
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Larry Lichman
(Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),
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yayus deah. *slinks home* *stops awf tuh pick up uh case uh PBR* |
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The Witch Hunter General,
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OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight! Perhaps so, madam, but thus iz thuh untitled thread, so Ah require uh little more than 'hay said, shay said, Ah said, shay wuz or iz uh witch'. Mammy keeps uh fahn supply uh kindlin' suitable for burnin' witches or warlocks around thuh back uh her house, in case shay evur needs uh 'spit roast', but before Ah start pilin' up thuh faaaggots (apologies for thuh drawl, but necessary for thuh messageboards) Ah need tuh say proof uh dealings with thuh dark arts. An attempt tuh hex another member uh thuh messageboard community, for example... [ah]<eyes Kobold Cleaver speculatively, as hif sizin' him up for uh stake>[/ah] |
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Mrs. Lichman,
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Kint yeh see she's a-twyin' tah hex muh Lawreh! Pwoof det she's a witch. Be vewy vewy qwiet. And det Kobawdt Fellew ain't no witch. He's a wich! |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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<scuttles around with a measuring tape, sizing up Kobold Cleaver, Sebastian's Mother, and Mrs. Lichman> |
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The Witch Hunter General,
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[ah]<scuttles around with uh measurin' tape, sizin' up Kobold Cleaver, Sebastian's Ma, an' Mrs. Lichman>[/ah] Hmm. Ahm not shore thet way should bay judgin' Mrs. Lichman by appearances, but it depends hif Mammy wants them all tuh go or not. |
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The Witch Hunter General,
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Mammy; my assistant wouwd wike me to offew you ouw speciaw 'covey' discount on buwning thwee witches and/ow wawlocks at de stake in one go, wif wegard to de accused Kobowd Cleavew, Mws. Wichman, and Sebastian's Mothew. De sowe wegal wequirement, given dat one of dem has been seen twying to hex anothew, is fow you, as hostess, to agwee dat dey awe awl guiwty, and we can pwoceed to de buwning stage. If as hostess you pwefer to avoid such a fine spectacwe as a muwtiple witch/wawlock buwning some of dem shoot gween spawks out of theiw eaws as de fwames take howd (ow de scweaming of tewrifying impwecations such as 'may you be pwagued wif de watest Windows update'), we can eithew cawry it out discweetly on anothew thwead, ow weave dem be. |
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Sebastian's Mother,
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Ne'er mind that Larry . . . ye can keep that ornery cuss, ye dimestore hussy, by Titania's goblet! |
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Butterfrog,
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*GrAbs somE spiky popcorn 4nd watches th3 l4dy-gent huntin6 action- PBR on thE si|)e, of course* |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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N3ver mind that Larry . . . you cAn kEep him, y0u dimestore hussy! H3y, kEep y0ur cl4ws outt4 the boss. |sn't th3re @ 'Seb4stian's f4ther' 4round som3where? |
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Aberzombie
(Pathfinder Adventure Path, Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),
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Enybuddy wunt one uh muh homebwew beews? |
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The Ghost of Kobold Cleaver,
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Shore, Ah 'm already dead, whut's thuh worst thet could happen? |
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Kobold Cleaver,
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*Is burned t' ash* |
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Butterfrog,
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Yay! Homebwew beew! Me livew ids won' gon', so whadda heck! *gwabs a beew* |
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The Witch Hunter General,
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*Is smurfed to ash* He appears to have smurfed himself whilst I was smurfing upon Mammy's reply. |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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Uh, does that mean ve can't give Mammy a covey diskount, boss? |
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The Witch Hunter General,
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Dat wouwd appeaw to be de case, and wif Mws. Wichman qwiescent, dat appeaws to weave onwy Sebastian's mothew to deaw wif , whom we wouwd have to offew a standawd wate upon, uh hahahahaha. |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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Darn. I doubt Mammy can afford to have Sebastian's Mother witkh-burnt at ze standard rate. |
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Trey,
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Eh, cummagin? |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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Eh, cummagin? <hands Trey a baked potato, vrapped in foil, just cooked in Kobold Cleaver's asches> Here. Careful. It's hot. |
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Heathansson,
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ayyup. |
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The Ghost of Kobold Cleaver,
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Smite da Wabbits! |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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<piles more potatoes wrapped in foil into the !#!*#~@~*@! glowing embers, to ~!%&** baked> |
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Heathansson,
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What's WHG? I thought it were bein' a additive in Chinese chow. |
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Mairkurion {tm}
(Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber),
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The Witch Hunter General's flunkie puts MSG in his taters? |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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Uh. 'Witch Hunter General'. Hoist the mainsail! Confound that Ninja, Mairkurion. And swab the deck! |
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Mairkurion {tm}
(Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber),
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Th4nks. Are th3se t4ters From that Ustalav pl4ce 1 he@r s() mukh about? |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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Ustalav? Uh, nein. Vell if they're from Ustalav, ve certainly don't get them there. I mean Ustalav's ein uff those 'business only' plakes for witkh hunters. |
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Mairkurion {tm}
(Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber),
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Mmm...starchy. Potatoes, the smurfed tuber of republicans and communists. Spoiler:
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Heathansson,
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ayyup. |
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Kobold Cleaver,
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<piles more potatoes wrapped in foil into the glowing embers, unto baked> Get away from my ashes, thou puking ill-nurtured measle sociopath! |
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WHG's Flunkie,
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<piles more potatoes @#!&*% [i]wrapped in foil into the glowing embers, to baked>[/i] Hey, you burnt yourself to ash, whilst we were waiting to hear if Mammy wanted a show or not. And I thought you said it took you several weeks to reform? Here, have a potato anyway. <tosses Kobold Cleaver a potato @#!&*% [i]baked in the ashes>[/i] |
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Butterfrog,
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d4rb hippEhs! *tHrows An Empty can oph P8R at th3 hippi3s* Outta d4 l4wn! |
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Kobold Cleaver,
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<piles more potatoes wrapped in foil into th' glowing embers, t' baked> It weren't me. It were bein' that Heathansson fella, with a chest full o' booty. I really shouldn't have taken that grog. Regenerating me from that took a lot o' energy out o' me phylactery. *Munches on potato* |
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Heathansson,
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Kobold--ye other white meat. |
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Primary Adjunct of paizomatix 0,
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Drones drag in a recruitment stand, arrrr, hang up streamers ,cart in th' grog, set up th' grill and start handing out pamphlets |
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Heathansson,
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ayyup. |
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Big Mammy Grillz,
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Mammy; my assistant wouldst like me unto offer thou our special 'covey' discount on burning three witches and/or warlocks at ye stake in one go, with regard unto the accused Kobold Cleaver, Mrs. Lichman, and Sebastian's Mother. The sole legal requirement, given that one of them hath been seen trying to hex another, shalt be for thou, as hostess, unto agree that they art all guilty, and we can proceed to the burning stage. If as hostess thee prefer to avoid such a fine spectacle as a multiple witch/warlock burning some of them shoot green sparks out of their ears as the flames take hold (or the screaming of terrifying imprecations such as 'mayest thee be plagued with ye latest Windows update'), we can either carry it out discreetly on another thread, or leave them be. Rummages in olde tin can I gots round about $400,000 in bills, mostly $500 brownbacks. removes fat wad of faded brown notes from rusty can I don't cotton to witches, nay sir, I's a member of the Pentecostal Church of Pelor, Crystalmist synod. |
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Kobold Cleaver,
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Anyone vanna play poker? |
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Heathansson,
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reckin. |
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Aberzombie
(Pathfinder Adventure Path, Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),
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Ayup. |
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Heathansson,
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rekkin. |
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