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Paizo / Messageboards / Paizo Community / Off-Topic Discussions / Archives / untitled, II     Recent Posts
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untitled, II
Big Mammy Grillz,

6 Mammy-Graul avatar

MidnightShadow wrote:

Really?


Avast lookie! We got us some roof rabbit fer th' grill! Shiver me timbers!

Aims Sarajuana at th' feline

*****BOOOM*****

Osirion Aberzombie (Pathfinder Adventure Path, Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),

Cold-Rider avatar

Ah rekkon so.

Kruelaid (Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Chronicles, Pathfinder Companion, Planet Stories Subscriber),

37 Goldsmith Col Final avatar

Whoa!!!! I'll be sorrier than a one ~!%&** eyed gopher in a cactus patch!! WHY??!!! ~&&*~*#!!!!

Kobold Cleaver,

Kobold avatar

Sebastian's Mother wrote:
Evil Monkey wrote:
OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight! SMURF!!!

Fight over, I win!

Curse you, you psychotic hag! CURSE YOU!!!

Cheliax Mrs. Lichman,

A 14 Sabrina avatar

Nuthin's over. Thet bimbo's neveh gonna git muh Larry.

*places phone call to Sebastian's Father*

The Witch Hunter General,

50-Molthune Governor avatar

Kobold Cleavew wrote:
Sebastian's Mothew wrote:
Evil Monkey wrote:
OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight!

Fight ovew, I win!

Curse you, you psychotic hag! CUWSE YOU!!!

Hmmm. If I undewstand cowrectly, Kobowd Cleavew, you seem to be twying to hex de mothew of one of de most mewciless and black-heawted lawyews on de Paizo Messageboawds?

Cheliax Mrs. Lichman,

A 14 Sabrina avatar

The Witch Hunter General wrote:
Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Sebastian's Mother wrote:
Evil Monkey wrote:
OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight!

Fight o'er, I win!

Curse thou paunchy fat-kidneyed apple-john, thee psychotic hag! CURSE Thou!!!

Hmmm. If I understand correctly, Kobold Cleaver, thee seem unto be trying unto hex ye mother of one of the most merciless and black-hearted lawyers on the Paizo Messageboards?

Mebbe so, but thet husseh shalt be also a witch! Let's see whut kinda witch hunter yeh art.

Cheliax Larry Lichman (Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),

Wormy 2 avatar

Yew tell'im, hunny! Scheisse!!

Cheliax Mrs. Lichman,

A 14 Sabrina avatar

Lawreh, yew git home! Yew've cawsed enuff twubble!

Cheliax Larry Lichman (Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),

Wormy 2 avatar

yayus deah.

*slinks home*

*stops awf tuh pick up uh case uh PBR*

The Witch Hunter General,

50-Molthune Governor avatar

Mrs. Lichman wrote:
Thuh Witch Hawh?nter General wrote:
Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Sebastian's Ma wrote:
Evil Monkey wrote:
OOOOOO . . . . . . Catfight!

Fite ovur, Ah win!

Curse yawl, yawl psychotic hag! CURSE Yawl!!!

Hmmm. Hif Ah understaynd correctly, Kobold Cleaver, yawl saym tuh bay tryin' tuh hex thuh ma uh wun uh thuh most merciless an' black-hearted lawyers on thuh Paizo Messageboards?

Mebbe so, but thet hawh?sseh iz also uh witch! Let's say whut kinda witch hawh?nter yeh is.

Perhaps so, madam, but thus iz thuh untitled thread, so Ah require uh little more than 'hay said, shay said, Ah said, shay wuz or iz uh witch'. Mammy keeps uh fahn supply uh kindlin' suitable for burnin' witches or warlocks around thuh back uh her house, in case shay evur needs uh 'spit roast', but before Ah start pilin' up thuh faaaggots (apologies for thuh drawl, but necessary for thuh messageboards) Ah need tuh say proof uh dealings with thuh dark arts. An attempt tuh hex another member uh thuh messageboard community, for example...
[ah]<eyes Kobold Cleaver speculatively, as hif sizin' him up for uh stake>[/ah]

Cheliax Mrs. Lichman,

A 14 Sabrina avatar

Kint yeh see she's a-twyin' tah hex muh Lawreh! Pwoof det she's a witch. Be vewy vewy qwiet.

And det Kobawdt Fellew ain't no witch. He's a wich!

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

<scuttles around with a measuring tape, sizing up Kobold Cleaver, Sebastian's Mother, and Mrs. Lichman>
Triple burning, boss, forsooth? We can giveth Mammy a discount for rooting out three evil witches or warlocks...

The Witch Hunter General,

50-Molthune Governor avatar

WHG's Flunkie wrote:
[ah]<scuttles around with uh measurin' tape, sizin' up Kobold Cleaver, Sebastian's Ma, an' Mrs. Lichman>[/ah]
Triple burnin', boss, please? Way can give Mammy uh discount for rootin' out three evil witches or warlocks...

Hmm. Ahm not shore thet way should bay judgin' Mrs. Lichman by appearances, but it depends hif Mammy wants them all tuh go or not.

The Witch Hunter General,

50-Molthune Governor avatar

Mammy; my assistant wouwd wike me to offew you ouw speciaw 'covey' discount on buwning thwee witches and/ow wawlocks at de stake in one go, wif wegard to de accused Kobowd Cleavew, Mws. Wichman, and Sebastian's Mothew. De sowe wegal wequirement, given dat one of dem has been seen twying to hex anothew, is fow you, as hostess, to agwee dat dey awe awl guiwty, and we can pwoceed to de buwning stage. If as hostess you pwefer to avoid such a fine spectacwe as a muwtiple witch/wawlock buwning some of dem shoot gween spawks out of theiw eaws as de fwames take howd (ow de scweaming of tewrifying impwecations such as 'may you be pwagued wif de watest Windows update'), we can eithew cawry it out discweetly on anothew thwead, ow weave dem be.
We have no pwoblem accepting payment in Confedewate cuwrency.

Sebastian's Mother,

Freaks 21 avatar

Ne'er mind that Larry . . . ye can keep that ornery cuss, ye dimestore hussy, by Titania's goblet!
Yoo hoo, Mr. Witch Hunter! I sure do appreciate a lubber o' authority who wears uniforms and cute little beards. Hoist the mainsail!.. Is there a Mrs, with a chest full o' booty. Witch Hunter General?

Butterfrog,

Kuatoa avatar

*GrAbs somE spiky popcorn 4nd watches th3 l4dy-gent huntin6 action- PBR on thE si|)e, of course*

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

Sebastian's Moth3r wrote:
N3ver mind that Larry . . . you cAn kEep him, y0u dimestore hussy!
YOo hoo, Mr. Witkh Hunter! | sur3 do appreciate 4 man oF authority wHo we4rs uniforms 4nd cute littl3 beards... 1s th3re 4 Mrs. WitCh HuntEr General?

H3y, kEep y0ur cl4ws outt4 the boss. |sn't th3re @ 'Seb4stian's f4ther' 4round som3where?

Osirion Aberzombie (Pathfinder Adventure Path, Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),

Cold-Rider avatar

Howds up uh 6 pack

Enybuddy wunt one uh muh homebwew beews?

The Ghost of Kobold Cleaver,

Black Mass Final 3 avatar

Aberzombie wrote:
Holds up uh 6 pack
Enybuddy wunt wun uh muh homebrew beers?

Shore, Ah 'm already dead, whut's thuh worst thet could happen?

Kobold Cleaver,

Kobold avatar

*Is burned t' ash*
*Three weeks later, to be sure, KC regenerates as that ornery cuss usually does*
I'm not a witch, aye, ye psychotic Monty Python villager, Arrrr! I be a lich!!!

Butterfrog,

Kuatoa avatar

Aberzombie wrote:
Howds up uh 6 pack

Enybuddy wunt one uh muh homebwew beews?


Yay! Homebwew beew! Me livew ids won' gon', so whadda heck!

*gwabs a beew*

The Witch Hunter General,

50-Molthune Governor avatar

Kobold Cleaver wrote:
*Is smurfed to ash*
*Three weeks later, KC regenerates as he usually does*
I'm not a witch, you psychotic Monty Python villager! I am a lich! SMURF!!!!!

He appears to have smurfed himself whilst I was smurfing upon Mammy's reply.

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

Uh, does that mean ve can't give Mammy a covey diskount, boss?

The Witch Hunter General,

50-Molthune Governor avatar

Dat wouwd appeaw to be de case, and wif Mws. Wichman qwiescent, dat appeaws to weave onwy Sebastian's mothew to deaw wif , whom we wouwd have to offew a standawd wate upon, uh hahahahaha.

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

Darn. I doubt Mammy can afford to have Sebastian's Mother witkh-burnt at ze standard rate.
<rakinkt through Kobold Cleaver's asches has bright idea>
Hey, everyone! Look! Embers perfekt for roastink potatoes vrapped in foil in, for baked potatoes!

Trey,

Owl avatar

Eh, cummagin?

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

Trey wrote:
Eh, cummagin?

<hands Trey a baked potato, vrapped in foil, just cooked in Kobold Cleaver's asches>
Here. Careful. It's hot.

Andoran Heathansson,

Werewolf avatar

ayyup.

The Ghost of Kobold Cleaver,

Black Mass Final 3 avatar

Smite da Wabbits!

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

<piles more potatoes wrapped in foil into the !#!*#~@~*@! glowing embers, to ~!%&** baked>
Here guys, help yourself when they're done, but mind your fingers, as they're hot!!! Come on, you know I'm right!!
I think I saw a bottle of chilli sauce somewhere, if you want ~*!#@!@#* seasoning.

Andoran Heathansson,

Werewolf avatar

What's WHG? I thought it were bein' a additive in Chinese chow.

Mairkurion {tm} (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber),

Carlisle Pathfinder PZO 111 D avatar

The Witch Hunter General's flunkie puts MSG in his taters?

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

Uh. 'Witch Hunter General'. Hoist the mainsail!

Confound that Ninja, Mairkurion. And swab the deck!
Here, arrr. Have some potatoes, I'll warrant ye.

Mairkurion {tm} (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber),

Carlisle Pathfinder PZO 111 D avatar

Th4nks. Are th3se t4ters From that Ustalav pl4ce 1 he@r s() mukh about?

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

Ustalav? Uh, nein. Vell if they're from Ustalav, ve certainly don't get them there. I mean Ustalav's ein uff those 'business only' plakes for witkh hunters.
I think these potatoes are 'patriotiks', whikh vere grown in Andoran. Nicht to be confused mit ze 'patriotik reds' from Galt, vhere it's best nicht to ask too many questions about ze soil they grow in, or just vhere ze stain comes from...

Mairkurion {tm} (Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber),

Carlisle Pathfinder PZO 111 D avatar

Mmm...starchy. Potatoes, the smurfed tuber of republicans and communists.

Spoiler:
I was actually smurfing for the link on another thread that quickly smurfed up. Thanks! SMURF!!!

Andoran Heathansson,

Werewolf avatar

ayyup.

Kobold Cleaver,

Kobold avatar

WHG's Flunkie wrote:
<piles more potatoes wrapped in foil into the glowing embers, unto baked>
Here guys, help yourself whence they're done, but mind thy fingers, as they're hot.
I thinketh I saw a bottle of chilli sauce somewhere, if thou qualling unchin-snouted maggot-pie want seasoning.

Get away from my ashes, thou puking ill-nurtured measle sociopath!

WHG's Flunkie,

D 1 Avatar avatar

Kobold Cleaver wrote:
WHG's Flunkie wrote:
<piles more potatoes @#!&*% [i]wrapped in foil into the glowing embers, to baked>[/i]
Here guys, help yourself when they're done, but mind your fingers, as they're hot!!! Come on, you know I'm right!!
I think I saw a bottle of chilli sauce somewhere, if you want !#!*#~@~*@! seasoning.

Get away from my ashes, you sociopath!! WHY??!!! ~&&*~*#!!!!

Hey, you burnt yourself to ash, whilst we were waiting to hear if Mammy wanted a show or not. And I thought you said it took you several weeks to reform?
Here, have a potato anyway.
<tosses Kobold Cleaver a potato @#!&*% [i]baked in the ashes>[/i]

Butterfrog,

Kuatoa avatar

d4rb hippEhs!

*tHrows An Empty can oph P8R at th3 hippi3s*

Outta d4 l4wn!

Kobold Cleaver,

Kobold avatar

WHG's Flunkie wrote:
Kobold Cleaver wrote:
WHG's Flunkie wrote:
<piles more potatoes wrapped in foil into th' glowing embers, t' baked>
Here scurvy dogs, help yourself when they're done, but mind yer fingers, by Ygorl's shield, as they're hot, by Pyremius's foul sister!
I think I saw a bottle o' chilli sauce somewhere, if ye want seasoning. Pass the grog!

Get away from me ashes, ye sociopath! We'll keel-haul ye!

Avast, ye burnt yourself t' ash, by Chaos's clapper-claw'd sword, whilst we were waiting t' hear if Mammy wanted a show or not. I'll likely kill ye in the mornin'. And I thought ye said it took ye several weeks t' reform?
Here, have a potato anyway.
<tosses Kobold Cleaver a potato baked in th' ashes>

It weren't me. It were bein' that Heathansson fella, with a chest full o' booty. I really shouldn't have taken that grog. Regenerating me from that took a lot o' energy out o' me phylactery.
*Munches on potato*

Andoran Heathansson,

Werewolf avatar

Kobold--ye other white meat.

Primary Adjunct of paizomatix 0,

Golemtrio 2 avatar

Drones drag in a recruitment stand, arrrr, hang up streamers ,cart in th' grog, set up th' grill and start handing out pamphlets

Andoran Heathansson,

Werewolf avatar

ayyup.

Big Mammy Grillz,

6 Mammy-Graul avatar

The Witch Hunter General wrote:
Mammy; my assistant wouldst like me unto offer thou our special 'covey' discount on burning three witches and/or warlocks at ye stake in one go, with regard unto the accused Kobold Cleaver, Mrs. Lichman, and Sebastian's Mother. The sole legal requirement, given that one of them hath been seen trying to hex another, shalt be for thou, as hostess, unto agree that they art all guilty, and we can proceed to the burning stage. If as hostess thee prefer to avoid such a fine spectacle as a multiple witch/warlock burning some of them shoot green sparks out of their ears as the flames take hold (or the screaming of terrifying imprecations such as 'mayest thee be plagued with ye latest Windows update'), we can either carry it out discreetly on another thread, or leave them be.
We have nay problem accepting payment in Confederate currency.

Rummages in olde tin can

I gots round about $400,000 in bills, mostly $500 brownbacks.

removes fat wad of faded brown notes from rusty can

I don't cotton to witches, nay sir, I's a member of the Pentecostal Church of Pelor, Crystalmist synod.

Kobold Cleaver,

Kobold avatar

Anyone vanna play poker?

Andoran Heathansson,

Werewolf avatar

reckin.

Osirion Aberzombie (Pathfinder Adventure Path, Pathfinder Companion Subscriber),

Cold-Rider avatar

Ayup.

Andoran Heathansson,

Werewolf avatar

rekkin.

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