Recent Posts
The muddy peasant looks up at the faint voice
'fallows'? Like the field has been left unplowed for a season? Are you implying that the socioeconomic status of the peasant is somehow inferior? Oh that's rich. Bloody demons with their money and their exotic dancers. Bloody fat cat fiends. Always draining the soul of the proletariat.
Nudges SirHoustonDerek
Did you hear that? That's what I'm on about!
The muddy peasant looks up at the faint voice
'fallows'? Like the field has been left unplowed for a season? Are you implying that the socioeconomic status of the peasant is somehow inferior? Oh that's rich. Bloody demons with their money and their exotic dancers. Bloody fat cat fiends. Always draining the soul of the proletariat.
Nudges SirHoustonDerek
Did you hear that? That's what I'm on about!
You can come over to our place, Peasant. We won't listen to you, but we won't beat you up, either. Unless the Cheshire Cat has too much catnip. But we usually hide it from him. It's a nice place, and has plenty to eat and drink.
You can come over to our place, Peasant. We won't listen to you, but we won't beat you up, either. Unless the Cheshire Cat has too much catnip. But we usually hide it from him. It's a nice place, and has plenty to eat and drink.The muddy peasant looks up at the faint voice
'fallows'? Like the field has been left unplowed for a season? Are you implying that the socioeconomic status of the peasant is somehow inferior? Oh that's rich. Bloody demons with their money and their exotic dancers. Bloody fat cat fiends. Always draining the soul of the proletariat.
Nudges SirHoustonDerek
Did you hear that? That's what I'm on about!
We have a mouse, beer, and Lilith Cookies.
What do you have mice and milk?
You can come over to our place, Peasant. We won't listen to you, but we won't beat you up, either. Unless the Cheshire Cat has too much catnip. But we usually hide it from him. It's a nice place, and has plenty to eat and drink.The muddy peasant looks up at the faint voice
'fallows'? Like the field has been left unplowed for a season? Are you implying that the socioeconomic status of the peasant is somehow inferior? Oh that's rich. Bloody demons with their money and their exotic dancers. Bloody fat cat fiends. Always draining the soul of the proletariat.
Nudges SirHoustonDerek
Did you hear that? That's what I'm on about!
We have a mouse, beer, and Lilith Cookies.
What do you have mice and milk?
Nay, we have ale and good, hearty meat! Not to mention some veggies....in case of visitors.
The muddy peasant looks around at King David and the kitten Jarl
While you both are most gracious to offer me shelter, I fear I must depart and rejoin my commune. It is nearly my tuen to be chief executive, and that is a task I cannot shirk. I will take this poor pink rodent with me. Are you ready Lemmiwinks?
In the blacksmithing shop of the recently-declared Emperor David, a furious hammering rings out. A skinny form is hunched over the anvil, pounding out metal pieces one by one in a haze of charcoal ash and smoke. The blazing forge fire roars as the figure pumps the huge bellows. The rainwater barrels hiss as each red-hot metal piece is quenched in their depths.
The soot-blackened form mutters as he works
Always pushing me around. Protecting their bougeoisie priveleges while the proletariat languishes! Strutting about in their clubhouse like big metal stormtroopers. HAH! If they won't head off to the dustbin of history, I'll just have to help them along ...
The clanging continues
The clanging stops. The soot-blackened peasant stands back to admire his work. A suit of fearsome-looking armor with a hammer and sickle enameled in red on its breastplate stands before him. Twin circular buzzsaws stand in place of hands. A rocket jet hangs on its back. A small cannon pokes its snout from just below the hammer and sickle sigul. The faceplate of this armored behemoth is fashioned in the steel image of a large-mustachioed man.
The peasant chortles
This will give those fascist Jacks a taste of their own medicine! And it will be all the sweeter using their own energy to power it!
Reaching in a ragged pocket the peasant withdraws a shining gemstone. He lifts the face plate and puts the glowing gem inside
HAH! The Jack's 2,000th post! I knew it would come in handy one day!
The construct's eyes begin to glow a blazing red
The skinny peasant cheers
YES .....
The construct strains mightily. The PlantJack almost feels as if it is fighting against itself. The construct throbs with stolen Jack thread energy
YOU ... WILL ... DIE
The construct booms out in a loud hollow voice. Its saw hands slice vine after vine off PlantJack
AUGH! You shall not harm them!!!
Mithril thorns start growing on Plantjack.
"This. Is. Bad. Leader?"
"Yes, I agree. We attack at once. Take the peasant captive. Only he can stop that thing."
"Err, do we have to? I don't really like the Jacks..."
"None of us do. But they are not evil, and they were the wronged--"
"Watch it, Shaman."
"Watch it, Oberjarl."
"Was that a threat?"
"Look, we have to stop it. It could cause terrible danger to us all. I hate to think what happens if all the Jacks die."
"Hmph. We'll see more about this later, but fine. ATTACK!!!"
The Kitten Vikings charge the Tsar with mithril greataxes.
The construct turns to the dracolich .. His eyes blaze
MASTER He booms out, kneeling before the undead dragon
Oh, sure, kneel before Zod! Just gives me better leverage to pry your head off!
*Begins cutting around neck to do just that*
Foolish mortal.
Engulfs thief in flame which oddly does not harm the Steel Tsar.
The construct glows in the dracoliches' heat
YOU ... ARE ... THE ... FLAME ... I ... AM ... YOUR ... CHAMPION
Hmm. This is a new developement.
Come, Steel Tsar. I have much to think on.
The dracolich goes back to his cave with the Tsar.
Oh...oh dear.
I must go...The Jack weakly begins on the road back.
Patrick Curtin
(Pathfinder Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Roleplaying Game, Campaign Setting, Companion, Battles Case Subscriber)
Like the Phoenix from the ashes I have risen to power again in the Realm of PaizoChat.
Come join us while we raid the sacred cookie vault while our Goddess Lilith is away rubbing shoulders with the great and the unwashed masses of GenCon!
Benevolent King David
