Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
Since no Top 32 contestants have dropped out, I guess it's "game over" for me. I'm curious about how well my entry would have been received by potential voters if it had been one of the Top 32 entries. Be as harsh or kind as is necessary.
I'll also post the comments I got from Neil, Ryan and Mark. I assume it's ok to do that, but please notify me if it isn't. There was a reference to a future product in Mark's commentary that got me thinking... or maybe I'm just being paranoid. :)
Naturally, I'll wait until the voting for round 2 is over before posting anything here, so as to avoid violating any contest rules.
I encourage the other three alternates to also post their round 2 entries (and at their option, the judges' commentary) here.
Anyway, to the Top 32 contestants: Best of luck! I hope to see really awesome villains in round 3!!! :)
Since no Top 32 contestants have dropped out, I guess it's "game over" for me. I'm curious about how well my entry would have been received by potential voters if it had been one of the Top 32 entries. Be as harsh or kind as is necessary.
I'll happily review yours, but you have to go beat up on mine first! ;)
|
Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
| 4 people marked this as a favorite. |
Alright, the voting for round 2 has closed. Here goes:
Fleshbinder (Summoner)
Fleshbinder (Summoner)
A fleshbinder forges a pact with an immortal being that dwells beyond the stars, merging its strange flesh with his own to harness otherworldly powers. As he grows more powerful, he may also enhance the creatures he summons with matter drawn from the realms of insanity and nightmares.
Fleshbinding (Su): Starting at 1st level, a fleshbinder receives a pool of evolution points he may use to give himself abilities and powers as though he was an eidolon controlled by a summoner of equal level. The fleshbinder's class level determines the size of the evolution pool and the maximum number of natural attacks, but he receives no other benefits associated with eidolons, such as an armor bonus or darkvision. Spells and effects that add or change evolutions affect a fleshbinder as though he was an eidolon.
A fleshbinder may only choose evolutions available to eidolons of the biped base form. The fleshbinder may add evolutions to his appendages as though he had chosen the limbs (arms) and limbs (legs) evolutions. At the GM's discretion, other options may be available to non-humanoid races and races that have other appendages than those mentioned above.
A fleshbinder may suppress or resume his evolutions as a standard action. The evolutions are automatically suppressed if the fleshbinder is unconscious, asleep, or killed. The evolutions do not interfere with the fleshbinder’s ability to use the summon monster I spell-like ability or its later improvements.
This ability replaces eidolon and life link.
Alien Augmentation (Su): At 2nd level, a fleshbinder may divert one point from his evolution pool to add evolutions to all creatures he summons with the summon monster I spell-like ability and its later improvements. At every even level thereafter, the number or points he may divert in this way increases by one, to a maximum of 10 points at 20th level. The fleshbinder may not choose any evolution he could not possess himself, and if a summoned creature does not meet the requirements for an evolution, it is unaffected by that evolution. In other respects, this ability functions as the summoner’s aspect ability.
This ability replaces bond senses, shield ally, maker’s call, transposition, aspect, greater shield ally, life bond, merge forms and greater aspect.
True Augmentation (Su): At 20nd level, a fleshbinder loses 1 point from his evolution pool for every 2 points (or fraction thereof) diverted with the alien augmentation ability.
This ability replaces twin eidolon.
Neil's comments
Neil Spicer (RPG Superstar 2009, Contributor), Sunday, 12:28 PM
A better name for this summoner archetype might be Fleshbender as opposed to Fleshbinder, considering what it does. This is a bold design choice. You're cutting out the primary underpinning of the summoner class by doing away with his eidolon. That's a much bigger step than taking away animal companions or familiars, as eidolons are far more integral in protecting a summoner.
In its place, you're granting a summoner the ability to apply eidolon evolutions to himself as if he was an eidolon. And I'm not sure that's all that well-balanced in game terms. I think eidolon evolutions go a step beyond what a PC class should normally be able to grant itself. But, there are some intriguing possibilities in what you're suggesting. Maybe if you toned this down and weakened a summoner's eidolon or stripped away the summoner's other class abilities to allow himself to benefit from a handful of eidolon-affecting spells (like a small evolution boost or eidoon curing spells) so he can apply them to himself would be okay.
Also, I think the evolution enhancements to all creatures summoned via summon monster spells is a bit far. That potentially boosts a lot of creatures to make them a lot more potent and that could be a game changer in most battles.
Bottom line for me is that I think this is pushing the envelope too far for a summoner archetype. And I DO NOT RECOMMEND this archetype design to advance to the next round.
Ryan's comments
Ryan Dancey (The Most Dangerous Man in Gaming), Sunday, 03:05 PM
Total Points: 5 Points
Recommendation: Recommended for advancement
Comments In Detail
Name & Theme (1 point)
Great name - great theme matchup
Mechanics (1 point)
You're using the existing eidolon mechanics and that's a good (safe) choice.
Putting them into summoned creatures is also good - it reinforces that this is still a summoning class and not a way to just amp yourself up into a killing machine.
Awesomeness (1 point)
This is the only submission to earn a full 5 points from me in this review. Not only would I use this archetype myself, I'm actually intrigued enough to maybe make up a few PCs just to have on hand if a 1-shot breaks out.
Template (1 point)
Good use of the template.
Context (1 point)
Take away the eidolon and you're taking a massive risk. Is this still an archetype of a Summoner or have you just created a whole different class?
Frankly, (amazingly) I think you managed the former not the latter. And what's even more impressive you've created something that works as both a GM tool for a killer NPC, and as something that I can see players wanting for their own use - and you could end up with wildly divergent outcomes as a result. That's pretty darn impressive.
Mark's comments
Mark Moreland (Developer), Sunday, 05:36 PM
This is a very well-designed archetype with a clear, memorable focus. It's actually very similar to something we've got coming in a future supplement of our own, though different enough that I'm not accusing you of hacking into our server to take a peek. Honestly, I can't see anything to criticize here, mechanically, but the writing could certainly be tightened up, as Neil mentions. The most egregious oversight in my book is the "20nd" that made it into the final paragraph. That's just poor editing and not something I'd expect of a Superstar.
All considered, though, I RECOMMEND this archetype for advancement. You're the second alternate that I really wish were in the Top 32 based on your archetype alone, so even if no one above you drops out to facilitate your move into the actual running, you should be proud of this. Best of luck and I hope to see you in the contest in the future.
Note: The wording of True Augmentation may differ slightly from what I submitted (though I did include the darn typo! :D ). It seems I didn't save the last version, grrrr... (not very Superstar, I know... :D )
That is a pretty awesome archetype. I really and truly hesitate to make this kind of things available to players (but ditto that for the summoner as a whole) - but for those that like that kind of thing, I think this is big cheese level stuff. Very good.
Fleshbinder (Summoner)
Oooooo. That's interesting.
It would need a lot of playtesting, but it's a cool concept. Well done.
Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 8
|
*sigh*
I didn't enter this year because I couldn't think of a wondrous item, but when I found out archtypes were going to be Round 2, the first thing I thought of was something very similar to yours.
Congrats on getting that 5 though! I'd definitely play it.
Since most PC's are humanoid, there's no Pounce silliness to worry about either. All the movement speeds are what I'm after!
Alright, the voting for round 2 has closed. Here goes:
Fleshbinder (Summoner)
** spoiler omitted **...
Huh. And wow.
So cards on the table; before the evangelist grabbed me, something very similar to this was my top choice for an entry. The flavor was different; mine was going to be called either the houngan or bokor, it was going to be voodoo themed (summoning loa to ride you rather than physical transformation), but the core ability change was the same: no eidolon for you, here's some evolution points to augment yourself with instead. So my comments on this are probably biased, because I obviously think this is a neat idea.
The main reason I dropped the idea and went on to other things is that I've never played a summoner, and haven't even seen one played. Which would have reduced my revisions to the realm of guessing, really. So with that in mind, I have to give an opinion directly opposite of Neil's; a summoner using evolution points on himself instead of having an eidolon isn't overpowered, it's underpowered. The main power of a summoner, from what I can see, is the fact that he's got a monster on the field that's tougher than the standard summon monster x spell, and both he and that monster get a full rounds worth of actions. In my preliminary designs, I wasn't able to come up with an idea to re-balance that; I think you did. Not having it interfere with a summoners summon monster SLA is a definite essential choice; supplementing that with alien augmentation is just plain brilliant. (And not soemthign I would ever have thought of, either.) It gives this guy a lot of the standard summoner's versatility without completely replacing or upstaging what an eidolon can do.
Don't know if you want to hear this, since it might be frustrating, but I think this would have been a solid winner in the round 2 entries. At the least, I'd almost certainly have voted for it, though again: biased. :-) But at the very least: MAD kudos on earning the sole coveted 5-star ranking from Ryan D, something none of the rest of us achieved.
I would have voted for this one definitely. The teaser that something like this is coming soon is most interesting.
Yeah, I want Ultimate Magic now more than ever. (Assuming that's what Mark was hinting at.)
Alright, the voting for round 2 has closed. Here goes:
Fleshbinder (Summoner)
** spoiler omitted **...
Nice archetype! A nearly-equivalent archetype was also in my top 2 to submit as well if I made Top 32.
You did a great job hammering this out--the difference in mine was that it was themed with shapeshifting and would have gained the ability to occasionally swap out some evolutions on the fly in exchange for the loss in action economy, but mine didn't have the ability to enhance the Summon Monsters, which is quite neat.
I definitely would have voted for this one if it was one of my choices, and I didn't use all of my votes--in my book, even though you're an alternate, you're a superstar too!
Since no Top 32 contestants have dropped out, I guess it's "game over" for me. I'm curious about how well my entry would have been received by potential voters if it had been one of the Top 32 entries. Be as harsh or kind as is necessary.
I'll also post the comments I got from Neil, Ryan and Mark. I assume it's ok to do that, but please notify me if it isn't. There was a reference to a future product in Mark's commentary that got me thinking... or maybe I'm just being paranoid. :)
Naturally, I'll wait until the voting for round 2 is over before posting anything here, so as to avoid violating any contest rules.
I encourage the other three alternates to also post their round 2 entries (and at their option, the judges' commentary) here.
Anyway, to the Top 32 contestants: Best of luck! I hope to see really awesome villains in round 3!!! :)
I'm sorry Superstar is over for you this year, but I really do think you should consider it a huge feather in your cap getting 5 out of 5 from Ryan and 2 out of 3 recommendations to move on ... that's no small feat. I am looking forward to seeing what you submit next year; you clearly have some serious talent!
|
Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
Thanks for the comments! :) It's really rather interesting that they've got something similar coming in a future product, and also that three people out of the seven that have commented on the archetype have said that they had something similar in mind for round 2!
I'm playing a summoner in the Kingmaker AP. While I love the class, I often find myself wondering why the immortal kickass eidolon is the rockstar and the summoner herself feels like a glorified groupie. :D The eidolon is so good at what he does that I rarely ever use the summon monster SLA. Moreover, the summoner has some really good spells on her list (haste, invisibility, evolution surge, black tentacles, etc.), and the summon monster spells are not very attractive options. In other words, to my experience a summoner does a whole lot less summoning than many druids or wizards do.
So, one of my main design goals was to fix these two issues with the class. I also wanted the archetype to be useful for heroes and villains alike. I borrowed some flavor from 3.5 classes (totemist, binder, alienist) and of course H.P. Lovecraft.
I agree with Sean on that a summoner who gets evolutions but no eidolon is actually weaker than the regular summoner. An immortal bodyguard is a HUGE asset, and when optimized, it's a more efficient killer than any of its melee character buddies.
Alien Augmentation is limited to the summon monster SLA, so it only affects one creature at a time (or 1d3 weaker creatures). So it's not as crazy as it may sound.
Anyway, the evolutions do open up avenues of abuse for clever optimizers. Multiclassing a fleshbinder may produce unexpected, possibly overpowered results, and therefore, a lot of playtesting would be required if the archetype was to be published. On the other hand, this archetype makes the summoner viable for multiclassing (which it wasn't before).
Fleshbinder (Summoner)Oooooo. That's interesting.
It would need a lot of playtesting, but it's a cool concept. Well done.
+1
Thats one of the things Superstar is about. Taking the great and way out there and making it work!
This is really cool. A nice tight concept and much more seamless than the summoner I was cooking up (which came off as too Sci-fi and had too many fringe questions). My one question is regarding the Alien Augmentation, do those evolution points return to the summoner after the summoning effect ends, or are they gone? Diverting evolution with aspect seems to be permanent, which could result in a major waste here. I'm not calling you out on this, I just don't see a mention of it in the ability description, and I think it needs mentioning.
This definitely would have advanced to the to 16. It's unfortunate that it won't, but it definitely seems you've got what it takes and should be back next year!
|
Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
This is really cool. A nice tight concept and much more seamless than the summoner I was cooking up (which came off as too Sci-fi and had too many fringe questions). My one question is regarding the Alien Augmentation, do those evolution points return to the summoner after the summoning effect ends, or are they gone? Diverting evolution with aspect seems to be permanent, which could result in a major waste here. I'm not calling you out on this, I just don't see a mention of it in the ability description, and I think it needs mentioning.
This definitely would have advanced to the to 16. It's unfortunate that it won't, but it definitely seems you've got what it takes and should be back next year!
Much like the aspect ability, the points diverted with alien augmentation can only be changed when the summoner levels up. The important part is this: "...divert one point from his evolution pool to add evolutions to all creatures he summons with the summon monster I spell-like ability..."
For example, a 2nd level fleshbinder has 4 evo points. He may divert one of them to his summoned creatures, or keep all 4 for himself. Let's say he wants his summoned creatures to be tentacled horrors. The tentacle evolution has no specific requirements, which means that each creature he summons with the summon monster SLA benefits from that evolution.
So, each dire rat, dog, dolphin, eagle, fire beetle, poisonous frog, pony and viper he summons with the SLA sports a long, sinuous tentacle. :D
EDIT: Oh, and thank you very much, Nick. :)
Wow Serpent. So I promised you a review, but I'm going to have to read up on some rules first -- this is too big of a change without having a better understanding of what is involved. I'll be back!
|
Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
Wow Serpent. So I promised you a review, but I'm going to have to read up on some rules first -- this is too big of a change without having a better understanding of what is involved. I'll be back!
That's alright - right now you're probably busy designing a villain anyway. :)
I don't know if the balance of this shakes out perfectly, but I definitely would have voted for it just based on the idea and execution.
This totally would have stolen one of my votes. While it does take a little big of a bite for an archetype to take, nearly stepping into sub-class territory, it's well written, mechanically interesting and very flavorful. Easily one of my favorite archetypes, including those in existing material! It's a pity you didn't make it into the top 32, I could see you easily getting into round 3 with this. Best of luck next year!
Dedicated Voter Season 6
|
After spending some time to go back and read your item and the judges feedback of your item and then re-reading this archetype.
You'd have gotten one of my votes to extend into round 3.
It would be interesting to see you write up a villain and post it after the Round 3 voting ended.
Actually I'd like to see you do this for each round.
While you might not win this contest, if the judges notice each of your submissions, you might get some work out of it.
|
|
Serpent, I think that you did make a bold choice but I don't think I'd vote for it. Here's why (if my two cents or feedback means anything to ya)
- This is not a Summoner. It completely guts what the class is about (i.e. the fighter who can't fight but can cast spells is really a wizard). The way it’s presented, it seems better suited to an Alchemist with some kind of variation on mutagen that works similar to the summoner evolutions. They have the Chymst PrC that kind of takes that tactic. Granted, it's not "evolutions" per se but the Summoner is the quintessential "pet class" and to take that away makes it a NonSummoner versus an Archetype
- As written, a character can dip one level in the class and get quite a few benefits. So, as a fighter, I'd love to get the one point Magic Attacks evolution and two scaling energy resistance evolutions for the three evolution points I would get for one level dip in the class. Never mind if I wanted to get a two point evolution for an unnamed, stackable +2 to an ability of my choosing... ultimate dip class.
- What would the summoner do with the Evolutions? Get more attacks? At a .33 BAB, even evolutions that give more attacks would just be a flurry of misses. Now, if they got the Eidelon's BAB… that might work might be different. So that leaves them with energy resistances, fast healing, DR, breath weapon, etc. but what is this variant going to do until he can qualify for those evoloutions (energy resistance/immunity nonwithstanding)?
I do like the Augmentation of Summoned Creatures. That ability would be cool enough to base the Archetype on just by itself. Like a pool of power that gets shunted around or siphoned away from the Eidelon. Now, you'd have to do something about the unlimited versatility you'd get (i.e. "Oh, we're fighting salamanders? Let me just make this [INSERT CREATURE HERE] I summon immune to fire as a part of the summoning action). Perhaps, if you invested the Evolution points, you'd use them until you dismiss/resummon your Eidolon or the number of Evolution points being based on the Summon Monster level used (i.e. Summon Monster V can have 5 evolution points applied to it). Point is, I like that ability but it needs a lot of thought on abuses.
Some things to think about.
I like it. I'm not as focused on balance issues, as I generally need to actually play things out to see if they don't work, so I can't really comment on those potential problems, but the basic ideas you're presenting seem very intriguing. I could see this being a neat way to use a summoner when you might already have a large party and don't really WANT another "character" hanging around.
My biggest quibble probably would have been your first sentence:
fleshbinder forges a pact with an immortal being that dwells beyond the stars, merging its strange flesh with his own to harness otherworldly powers.
Just sounded a little too much like the binder class from Tome of Magic to me. This would have gotten one of my votes.
|
Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
To everyone who's commented on the archetype, thanks for the comments and encouragement! Andrew Christian and Varthanna, I actually started designing a villain when round 3 rules were announced. I planned on using a multiclassed Fleshbinder as my villain. I might stat her out and post her here later.
Serpent, I think that you did make a bold choice but I don't think I'd vote for it. Here's why (if my two cents or feedback means anything to ya)
- This is not a Summoner. It completely guts what the class is about (i.e. the fighter who can't fight but can cast spells is really a wizard). The way it’s presented, it seems better suited to an Alchemist with some kind of variation on mutagen that works similar to the summoner evolutions. They have the Chymst PrC that kind of takes that tactic. Granted, it's not "evolutions" per se but the Summoner is the quintessential "pet class" and to take that away makes it a NonSummoner versus an Archetype
- As written, a character can dip one level in the class and get quite a few benefits. So, as a fighter, I'd love to get the one point Magic Attacks evolution and two scaling energy resistance evolutions for the three evolution points I would get for one level dip in the class. Never mind if I wanted to get a two point evolution for an unnamed, stackable +2 to an ability of my choosing... ultimate dip class.
- What would the summoner do with the Evolutions? Get more attacks? At a .33 BAB, even evolutions that give more attacks would just be a flurry of misses. Now, if they got the Eidelon's BAB… that might work might be different. So that leaves them with energy resistances, fast healing, DR, breath weapon, etc. but what is this variant going to do until he can qualify for those evoloutions (energy resistance/immunity nonwithstanding)?
I do like the Augmentation of Summoned Creatures. That ability would be cool enough to base the Archetype on just by itself. Like a pool of power that gets shunted around or siphoned away from the Eidelon. Now, you'd have to do something about the unlimited versatility you'd get (i.e. "Oh, we're fighting salamanders? Let me just make this [INSERT CREATURE HERE] I summon immune to fire as a part of the summoning action). Perhaps, if you invested the Evolution points, you'd use them until you...
Eric, thanks for the feedback, I appreciate your two cents. :) I agree with you on many points, but there are also a few things I don't quite agree on.
It should be mentioned, however, that "magic attacks" only applies to natural weapons, making it quite useless for most fighters. Also, the resistance evolution scales with summoner levels (or in this case, fleshbinder levels). Though of course, resist 5 vs. two or three energy types is nothing to sneeze at.
@motteditor: Thanks for the comment! I actually did borrow some flavor from the binder class, and some from the alienist. There's something Lovecraftian about the two classes, which I like. In my first draft, I had named the archetype "binder", but decided to change it because it might elicit negative responses from both people who liked the 3.5 class and those who didn't. (Which was probably a good decision - as you probably know, the evangelist was criticized for using the name of an existing PrC.)
|
|
This is more galvanizing my own thoughts with a fellow gamer who happens to have what it took more than anything else, so please forgive my forwardness. I find the idea of a Summoner Archetype interesting.
I was a bit worried that I might get DQ'd for submitting something that is not an archetype. No summoner archetypes have been published yet, so I took a huge risk by doing away with the eidolon. However, in my humble opinion, it's not actually the eidolon that is the summoner's main shtick - it's the evolutions. Also, the fleshbinder is actually more likely to use his summon monster SLA than the regular summoner, and therefore, he still is a Summoner, perhaps even more so than the regular summoner.
- I think it was a good idea though we'll have to agree to disagree on what makes a Summoner a Summoner. Anyhow, my ruminations about round two centered around APG classes (especially Summoner) as they would be "fresh meat" and not suffer by any existing comparison. Sadly, I did not have what it took to make the 32 but the ideas are fun to spitball.
You're right about multiclassing/dipping. It was one of my biggest concerns when designing the archetype, and ultimately, I could not find a satisfactory way to deal with the multiclassing issue within the word limit. I decided that it's more important to wow potential voters with flavor and an imaginative core concept than try to cover all corner cases. Had this been an actual paid commission, I would have given it more thought.
- Capturing the voter's hearts seems to be the right tactic to take as (in my opinion) most voters can overlook "this is mechanically broken" knowing that, before it's published, it will get fixed but a "that's cool, I want to see that in a splat book" entry will almost certainly gather votes. I understand that choice.
- To limit dips, what about only allowing the allocation of evolution points at a rate of X per day where X is the current Summoner Level where the max that can be applied is the summoner level squared (i.e. a 2 point evolution requires a 4th level summoner, etc. up to a max of 16th for applying 4 pt evolutions)?
It should be mentioned, however, that "magic attacks" only applies to natural weapons, making it quite useless for most fighters. Also, the resistance evolution scales with summoner levels (or in this case, fleshbinder levels). Though of course, resist 5 vs. two or three energy types is nothing to sneeze at.
- Touché about magic attacks but I would say that could still apply to a Monk... no? Especially if you can slap energy damage on a flurry of blows. Then again, monks get that normally at a level I don't recall at work. :)
- That seems to be the right tactic to take as (in my opinion) most voters can overlook "this is mechanically broken" knowing that, before it's published, it will get reviewed but "that's cool, I want to see that in a splat book" will almost certainly gather votes. I am behind that choice.
- To limit dips, what about only allowing the allocation of evolution points at a rate of X per day where X is the current Summoner Level where the max that can be applied is the summoner level squared (i.e. a 2 point evolutions can be applied at 4th level, etc. up to a max of requiring 16th for applying 4 pt evolutions)? You can still get some neat tricks for a four level investment in the class which is less of a dip and more of a multiclass.
The summoner has 2/3 BAB, actually. The eidolon is an outsider and gets 1/1 BAB, but since the eidolon only gets 15 HD over the 20 summoner levels, they both end up having BAB +15 at level 20. The summoner has many buffs on his spell list, so hitting creatures won't be a huge problem.
- Whoops, looked at their Fort save! Touché again(silly smaller screen on my nook!)
- I was thinking of the BAB of the eidolon at earlier stages but there's not an elegant way to address that.
I guess the description of Alien Augmentation isn't as clear as it should be, but the way I intended it is that you allocate a number of evo points that affect all summoned creature only when you level up, not every time you summon a creature.
- Yep, that's not a bad way to address it. So, in practice, a summoner at one level could allocate two evolution points and then make everything he summons immune to an energy?
|
Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
Serpent is back! Here's my Round 3 villain I started designing before Round 2 results were announced. I used my R2 archetype, the fleshbinder. 595 words according to MS Word.
Lilyann, Chosen of the Whisperer
Portrait: 1
Description: A perfect specimen of Varisian beauty, this dancer-turned-murderer has lured many men to their demise with her beckoning gray eyes, lush dark hair, and swaying hips. When she moves in for the kill, her hair turns into whip-like tentacles that lash out at her victims.
Motivations: A powerful otherworldly entity called the Whisperer speaks to Lilyann in her dreams, urging her to “harvest souls” by killing townsfolk and letting her summoned minions devour the bodies. For this, the Whisperer rewards her with increasingly lethal abilities and more powerful unnatural minions.
Adventure Hooks: Believing that the souls of exceptional individuals please her master, Lilyann seeks to murder fledgling heroes. If the PCs are noteworthy enough to attract her attention, she uses hired thugs and summoned monsters to harass the PCs and test their abilities. If the PCs do not seem highly suspicious of strangers, she uses lies and flirtation to gain their trust. Once she knows enough about the PCs, she attacks them when they are sleeping or otherwise vulnerable.
Lilyann CR 5
Female human summoner (fleshbinder, R2) 4 / rogue 1
CE Medium humanoid (human)
Init +8; Senses Perception +3
===== Defense =====
AC 23, touch 15, flat-footed 19; (+4 armor, +1 deflection, +4 Dex, +4 shield)
hp 35 (5d8+9)
Fort +2, Ref +7, Will +3
===== Offense =====
Spd 30 ft.
Melee mwk dagger +8 (1d4/19-20) or mwk dagger +6/+6 (1d4/19-20) and tentacles +5/+5/+5/+5 (1d4 + 1d6 acid)
Ranged mwk dagger +8 (1d4/19-20) or mwk dagger +6/+6 (1d4/19-20)
Special Attacks sneak attack +1d6
Spell-Like Abilities (CL 4th)
5/day--summon monster II
Summoner Spells Known (CL 4th, concentration +6)
2nd (2/day)--invisibility, lesser evolution surge
1st (4/day)--expeditious retreat, grease (DC 13), mage armor, shield
0--acid splash, guidance, light, mage hand, mending, message
===== Tactics =====
Before Combat Lilyann casts invisibility, mage armor, and shield before combat. She may use lesser evolution surge to gain an ability appropriate for the situation.
Using her invisibility and superior stealth to remain hidden, Lilyann summons creatures to attack her opponents wave after wave. Once her opponents have been softened up enough, she joins the fray. If she thinks she cannot win the fight, she flees only to return another day to harass the PCs.
During Combat If possible, Lilyann moves into position to set up a full attack while still invisible, so as to make as many sneak attacks as possible. On subsequent rounds, she attempts to flank her enemies with creatures she has summoned.
Morale Lilyann flees combat if caught unprepared or brought below 10 hp. She uses spells to help herself escape.
Base Statistics When unprepared, her statistics are changed as follows: AC 15; flat-footed 11.
===== Statistics =====
Str 10, Dex 18, Con 12, Int 11, Wis 8, Cha 14
Base Atk +3; CMB +3; CMD 17
Feats Improved Initiative, Multiattack, Two-Weapon Fighting, Weapon Finesse
Skills Acrobatics +12, Bluff +10, Disguise +6, Escape Artist +8, Knowledge (planes) +4, Knowledge (local) +4, Perception +3, Perform (dance) +6, Stealth +25
Languages Common, Varisian
SQ trapfinding +1
Gear Harrow deck, dancer’s outfit, amulet of mighty fists (corrosive), cloak of elvenkind, ring of protection +1
===== Special Abilities =====
Fleshbinding (Su) Lilyann has granted herself the following evolutions: 4 tentacles and skilled (Stealth). The evolutions are already reflected in her statistics.
Alien Augmentation (Su) Each creature Lilyann summons with her summon monster II spell-like ability has the reach of its bite attack (if any) increased by 5 feet. The damage die of the bite attack also increases by one step.
Wow...Serpent...Fleshbinder would have DEFINITELY won my vote. I can honestly say the your Fleshbinder is my favorite archtype that ive seen, not only from Superstar, but of any that have been posted on the forums with the "if i had been in superstar" tag line.
Also, Lilyann is AMAZING! I was really disappointed with the villains submitted this past round. I only wanted to vote for 2, and eventually pushed myself to voting for 4. That being said, Lilyann would have been my number 1 vote, without question.
Congrats and thank you for giving me both an archetype to allow in my games and an awesome villain that ill be using very soon (with your permission of course =D)
|
Contributor
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
|
Thanks, Banizal and Dragonborn3! I'm glad you liked my villain. Banizal, feel free to use the archetype and villain in your games. :)
I think the only thing wrong with it is the CR(should be 4 for a 5th level character I think...), and I would definitely use her as an NPC! Ooo, the tentacled carnage of Lil' Miss Cthulhu..
A character with 5 levels in a PC class is normally CR 4 as you pointed out. However, according to James Jacobs, it's ok to give a boss NPC a PC's wealth and increase the CR by 1. I wanted her to have the nasty amulet that adds acid damage to her tentacle attacks, so I did just that. :)
As far as dipping goes, I am probably the only person who would advocate dipping into summoner as it is, but this one would be very interesting to more people. But I digress...
I would suggest as a possible nerf to potential dippers, that you change your armor rules. Let the natural armor increases happen, but forbid armor, citing the change would interfere with properly fitting armor. I don't think it would hurt the power of the class at all, and it would make dippers think twice about giving up their armor. The natural armor bonus scales with level, and so is much less of a detriment to dedicated summoners. It would make your villain a little easier to hit, but later, she would be quite a bit tougher. That's just an option though.
If I were to play this archetype, I would definitely go with the half-elf, to be able to get the extra evolution points. You could make up for all the lost hit points with a boost to Con, which would be basically free at level 8. A no-brainer really.
In fact, you might want to hold off on ability modifiers until a higher level, maybe level 5, or exclude them altogether, like the aspect ability does. That would stop a lot of dipping, and really make people go for a multi-class at the very least.
Overall, I like both of your concepts, and I agree with others. I would have liked to see you move on. But they didn't ask me (for some odd reason) so I look forward to next year.
Hi Serpent:
You've received a lot of good feedback for your archetype so this may be redundant, but I promised I would come back after reading the summoner rules, so here goes...
Fleshbinder (Summoner)
Strictly opinion, but I don't care much for the name; it almost sounds a little dirty. I would've preferred something that plays off the evolutions, e.g. "Evolved Arcanist", or as one of the judges suggested "Fleshbender" (but this sounds even dirtier!).
A fleshbinder forges a pact with an immortal being that dwells beyond the stars, merging its strange flesh with his own to harness otherworldly powers. As he grows more powerful, he may also enhance the creatures he summons with matter drawn from the realms of insanity and nightmares.
I like everything here except "...dwells beyond the stars...". For some reason this puts me in a Sci-fi mood, which is not where my brain should be. Maybe you can change this to "otherworldly being", or perhaps "planes of twisted existence" -- anything to keep me thinking fantasy and not space travel.
Fleshbinding (Su): Starting at 1st level, a fleshbinder receives a pool of evolution points he may use to give himself abilities and powers as though he was an eidolon controlled by a summoner of equal level. The fleshbinder's class level determines the size of the evolution pool and the maximum number of natural attacks, but he receives no other benefits associated with eidolons, such as an armor bonus or darkvision. Spells and effects that add or change evolutions affect a fleshbinder as though he was an eidolon.
You're moving the aspect ability from 10th level to 1st level.
Super daring and well executed, for the most part. There are some questions of balance - for instance you can have your evolutions and your summoned creatures, which isn't normally the case. However, this may be balanced by the fact that you don't have an eidolon to hide behind.
A fleshbinder may only choose evolutions available to eidolons of the biped base form. The fleshbinder may add evolutions to his appendages as though he had chosen the limbs (arms) and limbs (legs) evolutions. At the GM's discretion, other options may be available to non-humanoid races and races that have other appendages than those mentioned above.
Obviously this reduces the evolutions you can choose from, but there's probably enough to still feel like there are unique choices. I'm not sure you needed to specify the limbs requirement since it's already mentioned in the biped base.
A fleshbinder may suppress or resume his evolutions as a standard action. The evolutions are automatically suppressed if the fleshbinder is unconscious, asleep, or killed. The evolutions do not interfere with the fleshbinder’s ability to use the summon monster I spell-like ability or its later improvements.
This ability replaces eidolon and life link.
This gives you access to your evolutions much quicker (1 round) than you would normally have them (1 minute). And there isn't a way to "banish" your evolutions as can be done with an eidolon. That makes me a little skittish as a GM. It's hard to imagine if this would affect balance without play-testing.
Alien Augmentation (Su): At 2nd level, a fleshbinder may divert one point from his evolution pool to add evolutions to all creatures he summons with the summon monster I spell-like ability and its later improvements. At every even level thereafter, the number or points he may divert in this way increases by one, to a maximum of 10 points at 20th level. The fleshbinder may not choose any evolution he could not possess himself, and if a summoned creature does not meet the requirements for an evolution, it is unaffected by that evolution. In other respects, this ability functions as the summoner’s aspect ability.
This ability replaces bond senses, shield ally, maker’s call, transposition, aspect, greater shield ally, life bond, merge forms and greater aspect.
Here is where I think you've gone just a little too far. Suddenly there's an awful lot of power in a player's hands. An overly creative player could be a GM's nightmare.
Moreover, how do you explain this? The fleshbinder has merged himself with strange creatures, but why would this extend to his summoned creatures?
Lastly, this could be a lot of work for a player to have keep tabs on how every summoned monster is affected. It's creative though, I'll give you that!
True Augmentation (Su): At 20nd level, a fleshbinder loses 1 point from his evolution pool for every 2 points (or fraction thereof) diverted with the alien augmentation ability.
This ability replaces twin eidolon.
This is a 2-for-1 upgrade - So you can now have 20 points to spend on summoned creatures, right? If I understand correctly, this means you can give all of your summoned creatures all of the 4-point evolutions. That's some buff monsters, but you are 20th level, so by then you're expecting to have some buff enemies too.
===========
Bottom line, I think this was a bold entry with some possible balance issues. In fact, it wouldn't shock me to see half of my party switch to at least one level of fleshbinder just to add gills, reach, etc.
The eidolon is a huge part of the summoner, but not the only part (you're still summoning after all). It's strong enough that it would've received a vote from me.
I can hardly wait to see the "official version" that was hinted at!
(If you have the time, I would love to get your opinion on the Time Mystery I created to replace my failed Chronologist.)