Wrath of the Righteous- Beer and Pretzels (Inactive)

Game Master drbuzzard

Initiative: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 1 = 15

Tanrov leaps aside at the last second and rips his earthbreaker up

One of em has Kevin!

This is not the sleeping place, you had a nice night of rest there. This is a new cavern. You are fully awake and advancing down the fairly linear railroad of a module.

Lovely. Before advancing, Xandarian demands the others wait while he prays for the much needed spells for the coming bullsh!t that is to come.

I assume you did all your prep. The NPC grumble or are cheerful as is their disposition.

I hate when my dot disappears and suddenly a bunch of f%++ing flying spaghetti octopi bash my teeth in.

Initiative: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10

"What the.. get this thing off me!" Kevin yells as he is attacked.

Initiative: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 2 = 21

Init: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (17) + 10 = 27

Uelarik fires on #3 as it descends.

Attack: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (18) + 4 = 22
damage: 1d8 ⇒ 8

No, you didn't have sufficient perception to act in the surprise round, so you don't fire on it as it descends. You do go first in the first round, and can shoot at it while it is in melee with Marcus. Given that you are in the back, it also has soft cover from you.

If the -8 seems like a bit much, you can reconsider that action.

Also, how do you get +10 initiative? I see +4 familiar, +4 dex.

Can answer that: elf racial trait fleet-footed which gives the Run feat and +2 to intiative. I think I can also recognise the 'build' as I am actually playing a Michael Bay Wizard here in the forums so expect Initiative to go up to 14 with Improved yadda yadda. You gotta lay down the smacking bwfore the melees block your mighty explosions.

Ok, I'll take it as he shoots and misses.

Floaty tentacle things attack.

1 on Tanrov:
1d20 ⇒ 5 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 2 miss

2 on Kevin (grappled so just constrict)
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 6 constrict: 1d4 + 4 ⇒ (1) + 4 = 5 fails to constrict

3 on Marcus
1d20 ⇒ 11 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 4 miss

Another shows up and attacks Kevin.
1d20 ⇒ 14 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 3 hit
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 16 grabbed by another

PCs are up.

"My good fortune continues, thankyou Pharasma for your blessings."

Tanrov uses studied target on the creature working out it's vulnerabilities based on it's thingness... then brings the hammer down on the black tentacle thing.

Earthbreaker attack+st: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10
Earthbreaker Damage+st: 2d6 + 7 ⇒ (1, 5) + 7 = 13

"Hmmm Maybe I need to talk less and concentrate on accuracy.."

Marcus fends off the flying thingy with aa barrage of punches "Fook off, ye wannabe mindflayer!"

Right attack: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (11) + 5 = 16
Damage: 1d4 + 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 = 6
Left Attack: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (15) + 5 = 20
Damage: 1d4 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4

Tanrov misses (but you knew that), while Marcus gives his a devastating 1-2 combo. Not down for the count, but hit hard.

Mol pulls a vial from his bandoleer and knocks back his mutagen.

His muscles bulge as his strength increases, but his brow furors slightly as some of his intellect dims.

He readies his axe to help Kevin next round.

"Keep your mouth closed buddy!!! You don't know where that tentacle has been!"

Uelarik will hold his action waiting for a clear shot should one of the creatures take to the air again.

Attack: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (8) + 4 = 12
Damage: 1d8 ⇒ 4

As the first one loses it's grasp on him Kevin says, "I'm fr..." only to stop as the second on grabs him. He then tries to break free.

Break Grapple: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (14) + 3 = 17

You try to detach the thing from your noggin, but it's clinging tentacles just won't come free.

Xandarian is up.

Xandarian, a little scared he might hurt the paladin, attacks the tentacle hentai on Kevin.
Light mace: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5

"Bring on the calamari! Anybody got a skillet? They fry up nice!"

The Hentai beasts (as good a name as any since nobody has identified them) attack!

1 on Tanrov:
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 16 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 4 hit
grappled: 1d20 ⇒ 13 grappled

3 on Marcus
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 19 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 1 hit
grappled: 1d20 ⇒ 5 fail

4 on Kevin
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 13 damage: 1d4 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8 constrict success down he goes

2 moves to Molitor (share and share alike, the Hentai motto)
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 15 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 3 hit
grappled: 1d20 ⇒ 12 grappled (just barely)

PCs are up.

"Lucky Drunk, what in the Abyss are these things", exclaimed Xandarian.
Knowledge (arcana): 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4
The f#<k if I know!!!

Marcus breaks off the things attempt to grapple him and keeps punching like it's Punchmash, New Fist Eve and the 4th of Punchfist at the same time.

Right: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (9) + 5 = 14
Damage: 1d4 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8
Left: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (20) + 5 = 25
Damage: 1d4 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 = 3
Confirming: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (18) + 5 = 23
Extra Damage: 1d4 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 = 3

Break Grapple: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (17) + 4 = 21

Tanrov breaks from the grapple and takes a 5ft step away from the beast.

Catching out of the corner of his eyes that the slayer had freed himself, Xandarian steps forward to attack the hentai.
Light Mace: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2 Sigh! Critical fumble.

"Argh!!! its got me!!! not so funny now!!!"

"Now it is trying to get in my mouth!!!!"

"What are these things!!!"

Knowledge(nature) to identify: 1d20 + 6 - 1 ⇒ (8) + 6 - 1 = 13

Mol flexes his muscles and tries to pry the beastie off his face.

break free: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (20) + 4 + 2 = 26

(Modifiers from Mutagen: Current AC: 16, current CMD:17, Str+4,Int-2)

Looking at the map, there doesn't appear to be anywhere to step to, so that's it.

Marcus downs the one that dared to engage him in a fistfight (and forget the fists).

Both Tanrov and Molitor break their grapples.

Molitor also figures out these are Darkmantles (it's actually Arcanna, but you have the same number in both).
Neutral, small magical beasts.

Kevin, however, does not believe this and is convinced they are hentai tentacle perverts and they think he is a Japanese schoolgirl.

Kevin drops to the ground and dreams of his fried appetizer putting itself back together and eating him instead of the other way around.

Stabilize DC 10: 1d20 + 2 - 2 ⇒ (15) + 2 - 2 = 15

Uelarik drops his crossbow and draws his dagger. He then moves to assist the others.

"I, for one, also believe Kevin is a Japanese schoolgirl."

Back to the DarkHentai.

1 on Tanrov
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 6 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 4 miss
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 17 moot

2 on Moliator
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 15 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 1 hit
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 16 grappled

4 on Marcus
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 8 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 3 miss
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 12 moot

PCs are up.

Kevin is stable and dreaming about tentacles and jiggly bits.

break free: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (15) + 4 + 2 = 21

(Modifiers from Mutagen: Current AC: 16, current CMD:17, Str+4,Int-2)

"Tonight we dance the Mamushka!" Molitor cries as he spins around and tosses the cave calamari aside.

You do seem to be an adept masmushka-er.

Tanrov smiles at Molitors words but he does not speak himself after last time. He raises the Earthbreaker and swings it at the hentai monster

Earthbreaker+st: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (10) + 5 = 15

Earthbreaker+st: 2d6 + 7 ⇒ (1, 1) + 7 = 9

Tanrov lands a solid blow on the kinktopus.

He slips on a tentacle but manages to allow the earthbreaker to fall on the kink octopus

"Gah... that was lucky.. thank you blessed Lady of Graves."

Marcus dodges the tentacled molester yet again "Ye try to hit me again and I will show ye what Police Brutality means!" he spits before one-twoing the thing one more time.

Righty Right: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (7) + 4 = 11
Damage: 1d4 + 4 ⇒ (3) + 4 = 7
Lefty Left: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10
Damage: 1d4 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 = 3

But he is distracted by sweet memories of brutalizing hippies for Public Vagancy and fails. Miserably.

Seeing that Kevin has collapsed, Uelarik pulls the tiefling back to the safety of the passage.

Seeing the elf pull the tiefling away from harm, Xandarian kneels down to cast cure light wounds on the paladin.
CLW: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7

Kinktopus turns.

Time for them to once again lovingly caress you with their tentacles.

1 on Tanrov
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 4 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 1 miss
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 5 moot

4 on Marcus McMahon (subtle, but someone will get it)
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 12 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 3 miss
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 3 moot

3 on The Moliator.
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 19 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 4 hit
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 18 grappled
time for more Mamushka

PCs are up.

Molitor is at zero.

"Where'd that squid go?" Kevin yells as he comes back to consiousness and then says to Xandarian, "Thank you! That was a dream I don't want to repeat."

He then stands and gets ready to attack the creatures again.

Tanrov dodges and jinks away from the slimy kinoctopus, but then he has no blanace and can't get a swing of at the blighter.

Earthbreaker: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10

"Blast.. why does this tentacled beast vex me so.."

I'll have you know, Buzzrd, that despite being a filthy spaniard paella flamenco olé, WWE been running strong for the last ten years or so here... but screw McMahon, The People's Elbow all the way

Marcus looks inquisitively to his flying squid. The rest of his allies are getting hammered, but he hasn't been touched since the surprise attack.

Surely his thingies are broken.

Direct hit!: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (10) + 4 = 14
Damage: 1d4 + 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 = 6

Uppercut!: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (8) + 4 = 12
Damage: 1d4 + 4 ⇒ (1) + 4 = 5

Damn. They're dropping like flies.
Xandarian hurries over to the half-orc to cast another cure spell.
CLW: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2 FU<K!!

Uelarik steps back and hits the creature on Molitor with a magic missile.

MM: 1d4 + 1 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 1 + 1 = 4

Molitor's eyes snap open under a wash of blood.

"Mamushka......" he slurs

break free: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 4 + 2 = 25

(Modifiers from Mutagen: Current AC: 16, current CMD:17, Str+4,Int-2)

You should remember you got a 24 hour bless from fixing up that temple

Marcus lands one punch (because of bless).

Molitor Moliates it with the Mamushka.

And the dark hentai grope again.

1 on Tanrov
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 17 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 4 hit
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 8 fail

4 on Marcus
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 15 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 2 hit
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 12 grappled

3 on Molitor
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 10 damage: 1d4 ⇒ 1 miss
grapple: 1d20 ⇒ 17 moot

PCs are up.

I didn't expect these to be this much trouble, but then you guys only luck seems to be bad luck.

moliation: 1d20 + 6 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 6 + 1 = 8

"Where did it go? " as he swings his axe wildly.

Tanrov swings and misses again after being struck by the thing....

"Nraaa .. die!

Earthbreaker: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (2) + 6 = 8

It may say d20, but I don't believe it.