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Woodenhead - Alvaster and Knoggs

Game Master Mysterious Jaguar


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Human Curmudgeon 35

Gentlemen,

This is as good a place as any to run our offline game

Check out the dice rolling mechanic below - it doesn't roll the dice until you post, cool yeah?

1d20 + 3 ⇒ (10) + 3 = 131d6 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 2 = 7


Human Curmudgeon 35

check out the "how to format your text" area below for how to do dice rolls.

you can set up a RSS feed and email alerts to see when something is posted


Mysterious Jaguar wrote:

check out the "how to format your text" area below for how to do dice rolls.

you can set up a RSS feed and email alerts to see when something is posted

let's gooooooo!

100d20 ⇒ (18, 12, 10, 3, 15, 17, 20, 9, 9, 1, 3, 19, 10, 13, 3, 8, 4, 17, 3, 9, 1, 6, 2, 10, 1, 9, 8, 7, 11, 17, 4, 17, 15, 14, 18, 7, 13, 18, 7, 8, 3, 5, 6, 10, 9, 10, 2, 9, 18, 20, 6, 15, 20, 7, 18, 12, 17, 1, 3, 3, 8, 13, 6, 20, 3, 19, 5, 16, 11, 20, 18, 15, 6, 5, 10, 20, 14, 5, 7, 16, 14, 1, 7, 8, 2, 8, 12, 9, 20, 11, 4, 20, 6, 17, 6, 6, 8, 20, 4, 7) = 1017


hello?


good


Human Curmudgeon 35
Zanzibari wrote:
good

very good indeed


Here for ease of reference I summarise what Alvaster and I, the player, are attempting to accomplish in this post:
1) Get some more background from Coco - and determine her options in terms of allies in the town who might shelter her.

2) Using Knowledge: Engineering to determine if he is capable of improvising any traps in the steamworks - e.g. if someone is standing on a particular spot he can turn a spigot and blast them with steam or whatever. Also the feasibality of 'rigging her to blow', if it should come to that.
Also - defensibility of the steamworks - does it have more than one entrance/exit, is there a lock on the door, etc.

3) Get a ruling on the quality of Alvaster's relationship with the necromancer Potenuse Vale - does Alvaster now consider him an ally, an acquaintance, or a potential rival with occasionally converging interests...

GM wrote:

You wipe the condensation from the window - the street seems empty. You hear nothing over the constant rumble of the steam boilers.

"they must still be looking for him Alvaster! But he's a ranger, he knows this place like the back of his hand and he knows how to disappear. They'll lose his trail and come looking for you!"

She wells up with tears again

"If we try to run away they'll find us. We can't cover our tracks like Knoggs. They'll take me back to Kabran and he'll...he'll.."

Her eyes widen in horror at the thought of some obscene and humiliating punishment..

" we need to give ourselves time to get away, we need a distraction, something big..."

Her eyes drift to the hissing pipes and valves of the boiler room.

Alvaster follows her gaze and his eyes widen as he takes her meaning.

"You mean THAT kind of distraction? Velsharoon's scalp-in-a-bag, no! I don't even -- well actually I suppose I could over-stoke the boiler and screw down all the valves, but -- no, it's inconceivable! And inelegant besides. Ah, but then again..."

He taps his front teeth with a fingernail, thinking, running scenarios through his head.

Knowledge: Engineering check for improvised traps in the steamworks - also general info about the steamworks please in terms of security
1d20 + 6 ⇒ (9) + 6 = 15

"No, with the steamworks ruined, Creed has no need of me alive, and cause for great wroth besides. No doubt I'd be dead already, but for the revenues of the baths. Could take a year or more to lure another engineer of my calibre out here... as long as I keep the hot taps running, there is limit to what they will do to me."

He looks to Coco. "But you are in a different kettle. Am I understand to understand that you've been held against your will these two months gone?"
He scowls furiously at the idea. The cloth covering his nose-hole wrinkles.
"What happened?"

Coco says some stuff, presumably

"We must think this through, as you say, we are no rangers - even if we could set some calamity to cover our escape, make it to the forest without trace, how would we sustain ourselves? Where would we shelter? And we'll not get far by road, on foot - perhaps to a lumber camp, doubtless stacked with Creed's sworn thugs... no..."

"We must secret you away within the town I think. Not here - they are bound to suspect me. But I doubt they will ransack the whole town, think Coco, who would shelter you? A friend, mayhaps, but not someone you are generally known to rely on..."

"The Gimmler girl and her mother owe us both a boon - likewise Mr. Cutts the Butcher. Potenuse Vale perhaps... a powerful man! He has been most helpful to me in my researches, though perhaps now he deems his debt discharged. And he is a necromancer of the old school, his ideas are not nearly so progressive as my own! Yet still..."

A thought occurs to Alvaster and he scowls again.
"Ah! And whatever happened to that irritating bard...?"

Allies in the town?

Alvaster curses himself for the paranoid habit he has picked up, of preparing battle spells each day. Some Divination would have been handy right now.

Alvaster watches from the window and readies himself for a quick exit, but where to go depends on what he learns next...


Occurs to me that Alvaster's position is similar to that of Walter White in season 4 of Breaking Bad - his boss would prefer him dead, and they both know it, but he's too valuable and too hard to replace...


His ears prick to the unmistakeable sounds of an odd-toed ungulate galloping full speed through the muddy streets, scanning the darkened surrounds he cant see far into the ink black night.
"Hearing things...but..."
Coco intterupts " Yes Ernesto, a sweet fool, i dont think he could keep anything hidden for long...there is one person whod never refuse me...
...Vamros...
..."Vamros!" Coco whispered as loud as she could and hurled another rock at the window of the magistrates house, Alvaster shivered inside his snug new robe, Purple cowl pulled up as far as comfortabley possible.
A head small head, almost that of a blonde child, appeared at the window and gestured with great agitation.
"Coco! What are doing here! Theres violence of thuggish passion abound in the streets!"
"Vamros I would never risk us both if I didnt need your help! Creeds dogs are after my friends! The time for you to stand up to him is here! Youve got to do something, something NOW!"
Alvaster crouches to bend the Cocos ear impatiently "They told me at the pub that the magistrate had been swallowed by a grumpkin years ago, and now you reveal to me that this boy is the magistrate!"
"Would you both be quiet before we're all lynched!" Quelled Vamros, the handsome young hobbit leaning over the windowsill
"I can call off Creeds dogs for now, but you,ve got to go home, I'll pay you a visit at the Lady (rouge lady: cathouse) on the morrow my love. Now make like a log and split!"
"thank you my giant!" Coco blows a kiss to Vamros who dissapears inside...she turns to Alvaster...
"Get home Alvaster and consider your inventory, be safe, I'll see you soon" She kisses Alvaster on the cheek and runs to a nearby chimney stack, vaults to the rooftop of a hovel nearby, perfects her cross-travel on the eave, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlZaqdyb6-I and is gone.
Avaster slinks back to the steamworks and is relieved to see the door reamins unmolested, he stops to meticulously brush his boots on teh doormat then is in and the door slams behind him.
He flings his Robe of bones on the coatstand and rush to his desk to examine the steamwork blueprints he had recently sketched up...


...oh and what Coco said earlier "Kabram is a cruel man, but only when we've deserved it. he says he worries about us all too often, and he does keep it safe from those who would treat us girls as beasts. If it werent for him...i can scarcely imagine what hell i would be in"
"Anytime I try anything outside of the cathouse someone gets hurt or worse...I just f$%* things up"
Her beautiful Amber eyes seem to Alvaster to be dilating and welling for some reason,
"Hollis..." murmurs Coco and she sobs into her fist
Perhaps she has a splinter in her eye thinks Alvaster...
"Shall i fetch a hot towel and some tweezers?" Suggests Alvaster with all hospitable intentions.
"No, Alvaster, we must think this thru...as you say....continues

Cocos relation with her pimp is like Jodi foster and HArvey Keitel in Taxi driver...


The steamworks basically consist of four levels, we will fix up schematics for your perusal maybe tmoro?
ground floor: Worktable covered with stains, blunt knives and onion skins, rickety rocking chair, larder, coatstand and washroom with naturally heated cast iron bathtub.
Loft: hammock, crude velsharoon graph on one wall, small slatted windows.
Basement 1: Tools and workshop, boiler 2 and pipes leaving(underground) for Bathhouse and mill(Darkwood is cut up into timber or floated downstream as logs...steampower works the saws and cranes at the mill)
Basement 2: Crude Velsharoon shrine surrounded by battleship grey candles, Main Boiler and bore plunging underground to heated spring, mysterious rusted door of which the key is not apparent)

Knowledge Engineering: There is regular wooden slatted windows on the ground level and smaller ones upstairs in the open mezzanine/loft, where Alvaster has a small crossbow stand near at hand to his hammock, it is aimed at the head of the staircase...
One could possibly open select valves at the mill or bathouse which would gush boiling water on people, that would require further checks at each location, and doing thus would turn off hot water to either location as well...though then you could control the flow from the steamworks level 2.


I'm confused about Coco's story now - also not sure that Mikey's description of the steamworks is consistent with the map emailed by Chris yesterday.

reckon you lads need to have a chat...

(Dammit I can't write "steamworks" now without visualising buff men in their undies playing Twister...)


Human Curmudgeon 35

Ok.... so this has basically derailed my storyline for Benzo and Vizigog coming to Woodenhead.

I was labouring under the assumption that the GM had control over all the storylines when they were in the hot seat but it appears this is not going to work.

I like the idea of each storyline continuing whilst we focus on the main game but it makes collaboratively shaping the world more difficult - i had some events and developments that I wanted to happen re: the lumber company, coco and Alvaster etc that would have brought the storylines together but I am not sure that I can develop them without having to tell Michael about some major plot points I am planning.

Maybe another way to approach this is for us to do some Meta RPG... bear with me.

Pathfinder deals a lot with factions and the Darkwood Vale setting has a number of factions in it. Maybe we take responsibility for a faction (or two) in woodenhead and then the story can develop more organically from their interactions? Opportunities for creativity and intrigue!

Existing factions:

Michael:
Lumber consortium - Kreed and his thugs including mercenaries employed to protect the lumber camps
Kabram and the cat house

Chris:
The Crowleys ( motives to be revealed)
Another faction you will find out about soon enough

Murray:
?

Other factions we could consider
Forest Druids
Sherrif/Magistrate etc


The description of the steamworks is just as i described it in game all them months ago, i specified that it was a seperate building from the the mill and the bathhouse, i mentioned lower levels full of pipes and a loft above that was the living area.
All i have done that could mess with your storyline (and that has applied my meta knowledge of the locale) is introduce an important npc, the town magistrate yeah?
its not too much of a stretch to assume one of the only hobbits in town is going to be familiar with the only hot hobbit hooker in town, and roleplaying this seems fine to me as Coco (played by me) would know well more of the town and its denizens compared to Alvaster whos new to the area(and murray dont know the source material)


I guess i did neg you with Vamros stating "he'll call off the dogs" but that just him saying that, maybe to get Coco to get someplace self. sorry bout that, but its not like you cant just divert the story to eventuate somewhere near you'd prefer it, thats how you be a good gm


Human Curmudgeon 35
Zanzibari wrote:
All i have done that could mess with your storyline (and that has applied my meta knowledge of the locale) is introduce an important npc, the town magistrate yeah?

And remove coco from the narrative and totally change what happened to her and made her boss completely different and remove Alvaster's need to deal with an impending attack.

I think that pretty much comprehensively "messes with my storyline"

I was clearly trying to get coco, Knoggs and Alvaster out of town and now that isn't going to happen.

It's fine when PCs make decisions that force the DM to rework the material he has planned but when players start DMing themselves and contradicting what the DM is saying it is a little frustrating.

I like that bad things can happen to our characters as a result of their actions. If players can just change the world to make it suit them then what is the point of creating a world.

Either the DM calls the shot while he controls the main game and confers with players who have created the setting, characters etc. or we work out another system to keep things fair. I have made a suggestion for how we could work this - does anyone else have any ideas?


Human Curmudgeon 35
Zanzibari wrote:
I guess i did neg you with Vamros stating "he'll call off the dogs" but that just him saying that, maybe to get Coco to get someplace self. sorry bout that, but its not like you cant just divert the story to eventuate somewhere near you'd prefer it, thats how you be a good gm

I don't think it's fair to start DMing and introducing characters without consulting with the current DM. If what the DM is saying is not what you think the characters would do then send an email or something OOC. I thought this was what we were doing.


Hi lads,

Allow me to mediate - with GMs passing around control of the same setting there's obviously a bit of consultation back and forth required and probably a bit more of a detailed handover needed where storyline threads are in mid-flight.

Regarding the layout of the steamworks - probably makes sense to keep it consistent with the original description - doesn't necessarily need maps as I see it, Alvaster is basically just trying to figure out if he has the option to dump a load of scalding steam on an interloper's head after they step through the front door.

Regarding the magistrate - Mikey was writing like he was still the GM rather than a player - honestly I think we should roll it back to the point of Alvaster & Coco's conversation at the steamworks and do that s!@& again.
Three points:
1) Mikey can suggest the the character Vamros be introduced as a possible ally, but this is subject to GM discretion.
2) Whether Alvaster & Coco are able to reach Vamros' house should be under GM control.
3) In the conversation with Vamros - Vamros, as an NPC, should be under GM control.

I think that's pretty fundamental stuff and Mikey deserves a tap on the nose with a masterwork rolled-up newspaper.

Regarding Coco's current status, whether things are relatively normal for her and she can just go back to the brothel, OR whether she's just escaped from 8 weeks in a torture dungeon - you dudes should sit down over a beer and reach an agreement on that, but more weight needs to go to Chris' opinion since he is running the game right now and whatever compromise you agree should fit with his goals as GM. But Mikey's view needs to be factored in since he created the character.

That's how I see it...


Human Curmudgeon 35

Ok. I think we have agreement on how things are going to work in the future.

I'll roll back the coco/alvaster storyline to an earlier point and go from there with the new model.


Im terribly sorry for the mix up gents, i got muddled up thinking rather of story game rather than d&d, and i was also drunk and stoned at 4am when i wrote dat. Soz
One final thing about Coco, she wouldnt have been tortured so extremely, sure treated badly but she's a commodity to her pimp, hes not gonna waste restoration spells putting her thru the meat grinder then healing her up again. I did take umbridge at her being presented as just a silly weeping girl, as I envisioned her more like trixie from deadwood, or lil kim even..more than just the typical helpless female role portrayed in most fantasy. She would be loathe to ever leave the cathouse, as she feels a matronly bond over the other girls/guys/oozes that work there...especially of the girl who just lost her kid bro to scaly scallywags. Perhaps she could just lay low at her place till any Alvaster/knoggs mess is cleared up


*Ahem*
His ears prick to the unmistakeable sounds of an odd-toed ungulate galloping full speed through the muddy streets, scanning the darkened surrounds he cant see far into the ink black night.
"Hearing things...but..."
Coco intterupts " Yes Ernesto, a sweet fool, i dont think he could keep anything hidden for long...there is one person whod never refuse me...
...Vamros, he's well, the town magistrate. Though theres really not much he can do without Creeds say so. Vamros often tells me, when he comes to see me, of the changes he'd make to Woodenhead given the chance, but you see, the Lumber consortium is the reason this place exists...and without them theres no reason for anyone to even be here. Anyway, Im sure he would help us if need be...oh by the quim of the holy whore, where is the sherrif when hes needed!"


Human Curmudgeon 35

The sound of thundering hooves breaks the stillness of the night. Out of the darkness a group of mounted men appears. They pull back on their reins and draw to a stop in front of the steam works. The leader pulls back his hood to reveal the unmistakeable outline of Boss Teedum.

"Norkrüng, you rat-f%+$ing whoreson, I know you're in there! Your s~*$-eating cousin has eluded my men so you'll be reviving punishment in his place! I have my irons heated for another beautification session - as far as I can tell you don't need ears, lips or cock to run a steamworks!"

He laughs and his men join in with a chorus of cackling and jeering.

"Alas, Mista Kreed has told me to stay my hand for now, as he has more important tasks for me to attend to. You've lucked out this time worm, but I am a patient man. One day you'll outlive your usefulness. Hopefully one day soon."

"Mark my words Norkrüng. If I see your freak cousin in my town again he'll be mine. Scum like that don't deserve to call themselves half-human. Mayhaps we'll try and cut the human out of him and see what dwarf remains. Colm here <he gestures towards a weasel-faced man dressed in filthy grey robes> can keep a man alive long after his heart's stopped beating. I hear you're into death. I'll make sure I leave you at least one eye to watch"

He yells a command to his men and thunders off into the night.


Alvaster presses himself against the wall next to the window, his eyes rolling like a spooked horse.
"Silence, Coco, silence!" he hisses. He covers the light from his talisman, though he knows it has already been noticed.

When they leave he breathes a sigh of relief - this proves inadequate and he sighs twice more - and still his hands tremble with agitation until many minutes after they have gone.

"This situation is plainly untenable!" he declares.

Okay so still some things I want to resolve from before the rewind:
1) Is it clear that Coco needs a place to hide? If so, back to the whole question of allies - next scene could be taking her to the magistrate or some other potential ally.

2) Still want a ruling on the relationship between Alvaster and Potenuse Vale - I'm assuming they've collaborated on research for Norkrüng's Necromantic Prosthesis - so how well did it run, can Alvaster consider him an ally or is he more cautious of the fellow? Even verging on antagonistic? If their relationship is okay or better then Alvaster may approach him for some plotting.


Human Curmudgeon 35

Michael has indicated that coco's relationship with her pimp is different than I had thought which totally removes the need for coco to get out of town. Rather than rewriting everything can we just assume that she just came over to warn Alvaster that Teedum was coming for him. We can wipe the stain of blubbing off her record then as well.Now that the heat is off she should be able to go back to cat house if she wants.

The alternative storyline I have come up with is tighter and more fun than what I was originally going to do, anyway.

I personally think that Alvaster and Potenuse should get on well. The character he is based on in the scenario has a similar philosophy to undead as Alvaster. I'll chat with Micheal about it tonight. It would be fun if Michael and you and role play a conversation between them.


Coco soon left with soothing words "Show no fear Alvaster, you are an asset to this town...without your skills surely the mill would descend back into disrepair as it had a few moons ago. Be strong...and be brave." She kissed Alvasters cheek and was soon gone.
A few sleepless hours later Alvaster finds himself once again unable to relax in the comfort of his personal heated bathtub, either his discomfort stems from current events or the fact that the tub was fashioned by the last tenant of the Steamworks and is thus of Gnome dimensions. He is too exasperated to ponder.
A sudden noise though, rouses him from his nonpondering...
"Wuzzat!....Hello?" Splashed Alvaster ungracefully
Perhaps the sound of autumn leaves or rustling paper...
An all too familiar pang stabs into mr Norkrungs third eye...but before he can wonder a small black shape leaps into his present alcove.
"A cat! Velsharoons calcified cock, when will it end!"
Splashing water at the small beast Alvaster attempts to shoo it off but he notices the creature is undetered and instead approaches the washtub.
"Out! Out and find mice you malnourished miscreant!"
He notices again that familiar pang and he soon realizes the cats eyes are both sewn shut, infact it seems to have no apparant aura of life whatsoever, and it moves with an all too familiar monotony, as if it were...
"Undead!"
The Black cat leaps up to the rim of the tub and mouths a silent miaow.

P.s this is a Christopher approved thread and im 98% in control of my mental functions


Alvaster reaches up and gently grasps the creature's heads, tilting it side to side for inspection.

"A clean job," he murmurs to himself, "though cats be useless beasts, in the main."

A message, thinks Alvaster, from one craftsman to another.

He rises from the bathtub, dries and dresses himself. Wraps again that black length of cloth across his ruined nose.

Then crouches next to the cat, which, anomalously, is attempting to scratch its own chin but, for want of some calibration skewed in death, instead kicks at the air some inches from its face.

"Your learned master would like to confer perhaps, little puss?"
He tentatively pats its head once, then wipes his hand on his hose.

"Lead on!" he tells it, and stands back, feeling half the fool.


Human Curmudgeon 35

4d6 ⇒ (5, 4, 2, 4) = 154d6 ⇒ (4, 5, 5, 4) = 184d6 ⇒ (1, 1, 3, 5) = 104d6 ⇒ (5, 4, 1, 6) = 164d6 ⇒ (1, 2, 3, 5) = 114d6 ⇒ (6, 4, 4, 3) = 17


4d6 ⇒ (4, 1, 1, 5) = 11 4d6 ⇒ (5, 6, 4, 1) = 16 4d6 ⇒ (2, 3, 6, 5) = 16 4d6 ⇒ (6, 3, 5, 2) = 164d6 ⇒ (3, 1, 6, 6) = 164d6 ⇒ (5, 1, 6, 1) = 13


Human Curmudgeon 35

Katerina "Kat" Crowley - 13,14,9,15,10,14


Human Curmudgeon 35

4d6 ⇒ (1, 5, 3, 3) = 12 rolling for starting gold

12 x 10 = 120gp


Puku Savage, noble barbarian brother...i rolled 11x10 for gp on 3d6, soz didnt do it on this thread


Alvaster downs the seemingly empty vial, and almost instantly his hand seems before his face mere viscera, then bone, then nothing.
"By the grave of God!" Alvaster hadnt yet experienced an invisibility potion personally.
The black cat made a miaowing gesture and scuttled off to the front door where it scratched impatiently.
Alvaster groped a few times for the doorhandle then opened the door onto the cold and muddy night of a Woodenhead street.
The small homonculus bolted out and around the corner of the house and it takes every effort for our Hero to keep up with it.
It is a quiet, clear night, and a cool breeze refreshes him, he realises its been sometime that he has been confined to his home, duty and fear keeping him inside and unaware of goings on in the village.
Alvaster struggles to keep up with the little creature, and as he rushes past the riverside, he passes drunks staggering along the way, halting and murmuring vile oaths at unseen footsteps. He continues along to the low market, empty now in the small hours except for a white rat worrying at a leather scrap, though his stalwart feline fiend pays no heed.
The Cleric and his wee guide approach the Rouge Lady, a popular joint in this small town and home to Coco and the harem of pleasure slaves who work under the cruel fist of a Mr Halfeye, pimp and irefutable knave.
"GET THE DROKK OUT!" Roars a voice and a figure hurtles out of the front door and into a heap in the mud, two more shadows exit the building to collect the crumpled person. A large muscular dude at the door crosses his arms and a shorter yet no less fierce half orc appears clutching a dagger which he brandishes angrily "Tell Kreed he owes me 50 gold for damages! I wont STAND for this outrage, you ANIMALS need to control yourselves!"
Laughing, Teedum picks himself up from the mud,"You'll have your coin ORC, make sure to fetch us a tougher kind of slut this time!" Payday and his cronies swagger off into the darkness and the owner of the rouge lady wipes his mouth with the back of his gnarled hand and disapears inside, oblivious to the undetectable gawker only metres away.
Before he has a moment to consider this fresh mischief, the small ghoul darts down the side of the cathouse towards the river, Alvaster then rushes after it into the darkness.
The Rouge lady stands on piles at the riverside, allowing what would seem a lovely river view to an uncultured brute such as the clientele found in Woodenhead, but underneath at the river Cunny's edge, thick mud smothers countless rotten logs, broken bottles and much chewed bones that pile up into the gloom underneath the building.
"Norkrung!" a harsh whisper pierces the black silence.
The small cat rubs its bony frame along his shin as he squints to make out the whispers source, there seems to be some muffled splashing from out in the river.
"Norkrung!" again and the splashing comes nearer, a small dinghy appears, there is two figures aboard, one big, one small.
"Pap-pap i can detect Horis, he's just down there." whispers what seems to be a childs voice.
As the boat nears the shore the larger figure glances up to the lit cathouse above, Alvaster makes out unmistakeably the scowling face of Potenuse Vade who rows the small boat towards Alvaster with renewed vigor.
"Norkrung, you boob, reveal yourself!" Whispers Potenuse, the grizzled necromancer as he stows the oars aboard. Young Savram, his wide eyed son, leaps into the calf deep water and guides the boat to shore.
"Horis, to me boy!" he whispers to the cat-husk


Human Curmudgeon 35
Zanzibari wrote:

"GET THE DROKK OUT!" Roars a voice and a figure hurtles out of the front door and into a heap in the mud, two more shadows exit the building to collect the crumpled person. A large muscular dude at the door crosses his arms and a shorter yet no less fierce half orc appears clutching a dagger which he brandishes angrily "Tell Kreed he owes me 50 gold for damages! I wont STAND for this outrage, you ANIMALS need to control yourselves!"

Laughing, Teedum picks himself up from the mud,"You'll have your coin ORC, make sure to fetch us a tougher kind of slut this time!" Payday and his cronies swagger off into the darkness and the owner of the rouge lady wipes his mouth with the back...

Teedum and the grey cloaks headed off to break up the striking lumberjacks camp after threatening Alvaster - this being the "urgent business" that Teedum referred to. So perhaps this is just the result of Alvaster's fevered imagination....

So the river is the river Cunny... Looking forward to climbing Mt Poopooweeweedick in the near future.

Horis "lives"!


If your done interupting you Christopher, I'll have you know the river Cunny was mentioned in maybe the first line of my adventure when Alvaster turned up in Woodenhead. And you've probably offended half the townsfolk with your peurile "quip" as everyone is aware the river was named after the Virgin Anastasia Cunny, the bold and selfless cleric who gave her life to save the people of the vale from the fearsome Dracolich Xerbechionillally.
Feel free to add Mt Poopooweeweedick to your campaign if you like.


Zanzibari wrote:

If your done interupting you Christopher, I'll have you know the river Cunny was mentioned in maybe the first line of my adventure when Alvaster turned up in Woodenhead. And you've probably offended half the townsfolk with your peurile "quip" as everyone is aware the river was named after the Virgin Anastasia Cunny, the bold and selfless cleric who gave her life to save the people of the vale from the fearsome Dracolich Xerbechionillally.

Feel free to add Mt Poopooweeweedick to your campaign if you like.

I just thought it was the next night already...?


Alvaster feels a queer sensation of becoming whole once more as the potion abruptly wears off...he is joyous to be able to see the inside of his eyelids again.
"Ah you did make it, good good. Get in the boat man time is of the essence!" Vade beckons.
"Hello Mr Alvaster!" Savrams smile seems genuine yet a little strange on his too oft sombre little face.
Alvaster struggles to keep his feet dry yet stumbles in the mud, and with a splash ungraciously flops into the dinghy. Vade whispers a curse then turns to his son "Quickly boy, in in!"
Savram scoops up Horis the catpurse and flops into the boat as if emulating Alvaster, and wasting no time Potenuse pulls on the oars sending the boat slowly out into the river.
"Keep quiet!" Whispers Vade,
Alvasters crouches in the boat and a distant clamour reaches his ears, seemingly emanating from the cathouse. One voice is unmistakeably familiar..."Coco," says Norkrung "Silence!" Hisses Vade
It seems some arguement going on and also some sound of weeping.
"..ut that whimper or you'll be joining her!" Barks a harsh voice. "...going to just let them get away with this its frakking murder for Croms sake!" Shrieks Coco.
"Dont you frakkin start wench, get these sluts back to the common room and let us clean this up!" "But.." "Enough! Dont make me do something you'll regret!"
There is movement at one of the windows and as the curtains are thrown back the face of the Cathouse's Orcish grotesque appears...
"See Nothing!" Gesticulates Vade mystically and an obscuring mist seems to flow from his palm, settling at a level above the boats occupants and probably a few feet below the window.
The noises of scuffling movement continue above as the three in the dinghy sit in silence..."I really dont see what is this about..." Blurts Alvaster "Patience!" curses Vade.
All of a sudden there is a loud splash from towards the water below the Rouge Lady "Now, we mustnt waste any time!" and Potenuse pulls frantically on the oars, the boat skims the rivers surface towards the noises source. "Those thrice damned savages behave like this whenever their bloods up, but we musnt waste this opportunity!"
Within a few seconds Alvaster can make out a white shape in the water, he realises before too long that is in fact a young lady, no doubt a wench from the brothel above.
"Here Norkrung!" Vade hands Alvaster a large gaff hook "Pull her in, and get what you need!" Savram also presents a small dangerous looking razor blade and offers it to Alvaster, "A pretty new nose for you Mr Alvaster!"


Human Curmudgeon 35
doggziller wrote:
Zanzibari wrote:
A few sleepless hours later Alvaster finds himself once again unable to relax in the comfort of his personal heated bathtub...

I just thought it was the next night already...?

It's later that night. Teedum is out of town on "bidness"


"You have an eye for the chance, sir", says Alvaster appreciatively.
He then looks to Savram's razor and smiles wanly.
"Hold onto that blade a moment longer dear boy."

Alvaster leans out with the gaff hook, fearful of overbalancing himself.
Never a graceful man on land, on the water he almost seems resigned to mishap.
DEX check
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (12) - 1 = 11
Assuming no trouble...

With effort the corpse is drawn upon the boat.
"Are we doing this right here?" Alvaster asks uncertainly.

Assuming yes...

Vade's mouth twitches as he stares back. Savram mutely proffers the knife. Alvaster takes this as a yes and applies himself to the task with the deft hand of a practiced dissectionist. Swiftly the nose is detached and Alvaster turns the bloody morsel over in his hand, scrutinising it. He tries and fails to imagine how it might look upon his own unrefined face, in place of the bulbous knob that once there sprouted proud , that fond memory in the mirror which perhaps now lies in a dog's stomach somewhere. But his imagination is not up to the task.

Bundling the nose into a cloth, he mutters a charm of preservation and secrets it away.
"Attachment of the organ shall have to wait," he tells Vade, "for I will need to beseech Velsharoon's grace in some midnight yet to come."
He considers a moment.
"Also," he sighs, and continues with plain reluctance, "I must confess that as things stand, I fear to wear it. Things are escalating too quickly. My good cousin is driven from the town, gone I know not where. Teedum and his hoodlums harass me daily. If they see me whole, it will provoke their ire, and my facade --" he coughs momentarily on an inhaled drop of saliva, "-- my facade of meek submission is undone. They will fall upon me at once, I can see no other outcome. They have promised to do worse things to me yet."
He shakes his head.
"I'd hoped for more time to gather strength and perfect my tactics... but it may be that time draws near when I must commit myself to swift destruction, be it theirs or my own."

He sets his jaw and glares out over the water.
"But that moment will be of my choosing!" he vows.


Vades eyes twinkle supernaturally "You have a powerful fire of vengeance burning within my friend, make sure to channel it wisely lest you become consumed entirely...these savage men are not mere Kobolds."
"Pap-pap!" Savram chirps as he clambers over the girls corpse "I see dire Eels!" He points off to some frothing turbulence out in the river.
"We must away, unfortunately these things have grown all too accustomed to the taste of man flesh. Get her in the sack lad" Vade lends his strength to the oars and the boat glides away from the overhanging Brothel. Savram pulls a mundane seeming sack from beneath the naked girl and holds open the sacks mouth, as he holds it over the girls head she seems to be devoured noiselessly into the bag like a Bullfrog downing a maggot. Savram then stuffs the seemingly empty bag into a wooden bucket.
Potenuse guides the dinghy between the shore and a half submerged barge, then drives it up onto the mud amidst a collection of decrepid hovels.
As Alvaster clambers ashore with all effort of dexterity Potenuse passes him another vial "Down this and get thee home at once! Do not dally with prowling and peeping, the glamer shall not last long!" He also produces a small leather object which he places in Alvasters hand. It appears to the Cleric to be a chewed dogs toy or leather bow tie.
"Um...i shall wear it always?" He murmurs as suddenly the object begins to creep up his sleeve, he realizes it is in fact a small husk of a bat. Animated in undeath and hollow not unlike Horis the skulking feline necrope. Potenuse and Savram both chuckle before the father mentions "It is a way for you to contact me in these dangerous times, just place a message inside and release the creature, it will find its way to me. "
"Is there anything you would know more of, Alvaster Norkrung? Savram and I must spirit away before first light..."


"Only the boon of your experience, sir. I have given much thought to Creed and his grey dogs, where they be weak, and how to move against them. Though I have not been here long it is clear to me that of the men who work for them, most are ill-used, I am confident that with a little incentive they can be moved to rebellion - and with crafty leadership and a smattering of divine support, well, what could not be achieved? But I do not know who among the jacks are men of influence, their character and disposition - likewise, who are the informers and cravens among them! You have been here for much longer than I, who should I look to, do you think?"

Pause for response

"We must consider also the Consortium itself. I surmise that they will be indifferent to any change in the balance of power providing only that logs keep floating down the river... however it would be good to know a little of Creed's superiors and how they weigh in..."

Pause for response

Alvaster readies to leave as the duo clamber into their boat, then hesitate and turns.

"You know I am no fighter, friend Vade, but if it were to come to blood in the streets - can I count upon your aid?"

Pause for response

Alvaster downs the vial and moves briskly homewards. Although he is mindful of Vale's injunctions against peeping, he stays alert for any opportunities to exploit the fleeting enchantment to learn more of his enemies.

Perception roll
1d20 + 4 ⇒ (13) + 4 = 17
Didn't apply the disfigurement penalty as I assume vision is what will matter here - but otherwise subtract 2


Imma tag in Cristopher for this response in case I put some feets in my mouth...


Human Curmudgeon 35

"Only the boon of your experience, sir. I have given much thought to Creed and his grey dogs, where they be weak, and how to move against them. Though I have not been here long it is clear to me that of the men who work for them, most are ill-used, I am confident that with a little incentive they can be moved to rebellion - and with crafty leadership and a smattering of divine support, well, what could not be achieved? But I do not know who among the jacks are men of influence, their character and disposition - likewise, who are the informers and cravens among them! You have been here for much longer than I, who should I look to, do you think?"

“I care not for politics, the current situation suits me well enough; it keeps a steady flow of bodies for my studies. My conversations with the dead have given me enough information to avoid the attentions of Kreed and his men but nothing more. Alas, all people of significance are buried within the walls of the Falcon’s Crest <This is the walled off section of town on the hill where the lumber consortium offices are located> an area I am unable to access easily. Should you be able to procure the body of one of Kreed’s cronies, well, we could learn many secrets. The dead tell no lies.”

“If you are not up to such an endeavour, I suppose you could talk to the Sherriff, he has never bothered to hide his contempt for Kreed. I would not be surprised to find he had friends within the ‘jacks”

"We must consider also the Consortium itself. I surmise that they will be indifferent to any change in the balance of power providing only that logs keep floating down the river... however it would be good to know a little of Creed's superiors and how they weigh in..."

“I do not see why this should not be the case. I dare say they would not be pleased to hear of some of the decisions Kreed has made. His lack of restraint in increasing the quotas, and lining his pocket in the process, may make logging too risky in the long term. The increasing agitation of the tribals, and the dissent of the ‘jacks, have increased his reliance on mercenaries for security at the logging camps. The only way he can keep paying them is to increase the quotas, a strategy which seems just exacerbate the situation.”

Alvaster readies to leave as the duo clamber into their boat, then hesitate and turns.

"You know I am no fighter, friend Vade, but if it were to come to blood in the streets - can I count upon your aid?"

“You are a man with a unique perspective Mr Norkrung. I have not met many men like you. Whilst we disagree on a few fundamental matters, our conversations over the past few weeks have given me new direction in my research. To find a like-minded individual in such a remote hell-hole strikes me as highly unlikely. Whilst I have abandoned the gods, as they have abandoned me, I cannot help but feel that some divine provenance is at hand. Should the situation turn to violence I will stand by your side, not for any sense of truth or justice, I care not for these things, but for the sake of the friendship that has grown between us. Should your plans come to fruition, I would expect you would have some influence in the new regime. I hope that I can rely on you to ensure that my son and I are left to go about our business without molestation.”

You feel a tugging at your sleeve. “Mr Alvaster, sir”

You look down to see Savram staring up at you with a serious look on his face

“Miss Kimi, has many stores about her father, Mr Evewalker. Kimi says he lived with the tribals for a while and speaks their language. She says he used to negotiate between the ‘jacks and the tribals, until Mr Kreed made them angry. He doesn’t come to town often, but if you can find him I’m sure he could tell you a lot more about what is going on”

Alvaster downs the vial and moves briskly homewards. Although he is mindful of Vale's injunctions against peeping, he stays alert for any opportunities to exploit the fleeting enchantment to learn more of his enemies.
Perception roll
1d20 + 4 ⇒ (13) + 4 = 17
Didn't apply the disfigurement penalty as I assume vision is what will matter here - but otherwise subtract 2

It is now early morning, the sky lightens to the east. The tavern and cat house are quiet and their windows dark.

<assuming you are interested in helping Potenuse obtain a body>

Taking an opportunity to better understand the defences of the Falcons Crest, an area you have been unable to gain access to since your disfigurement, you make your way up the hill to the gate. The light in the gatehouse indicates it is occupied, although you hear no noise from inside. Peering in from the window you see a guard slumped over a table. A nearly empty bottle of moonshine lies on its side in front of him.

From your experience with the previous potion you estimate you have about 5 minutes remaining before the effect wears off. You estimate it would take about 2 minutes to get back to the safety of the shadows of the streets, where you can sneak back to the steamworks without magical aid.


Human Curmudgeon 35

The sky is dark and heavy with storm clouds, a thunderstorm appears to be immanent. You shudder at the thought of catching a cold with your nose in it's current state...


do we have any idea who these "tribals" are? or does that just refer to folks who dont care about human/metahuman society eg bugbears, goblins etc


Human Curmudgeon 35

On hearing of the tribals, Alvaster casts his mind back to the research he carried out when preparing for his journey to Woodenhead.

The Wetawhakawi are a tribe of human and half-orc warriors who dwell in their fortress of Ruapekapeka in the deepest part of Darkmoon forest. When the consortium first came to the vale they were suspicious and reacted violently to the incursions of the seekers into their sacred groves. At first the battle was one-sided, with their stone and darkwood weapons the savages were no match for the steel-armed prospectors. But the Wetawhakawi are a cunning people, and were quick to see the advantages such weapons could give them in their struggles against their ancient enemy, the fey. Their chief, Titokuwaru, made an agreement with the lumber consortium that Darkwood could be felled in exchange for the weapons and knowledge of civilization. The great chief made one demand, on no circumstances was darkwood to be taken from the north of the river Cunny (or kunikuni as it is known in their language). It seems in his need to increase his quota Kreed has broken this agreement and, as a result, brought the wrath of the savages down on the consortium.

Alvaster didn't pay much attention to the tribe at the time, whilst their culture was obsessed with death, their forays into necromancy did not extend far beyond a number of unimaginative, if not highly potent, death curses.

There were a number of lumberjacks who had savage ancestry but they stick to the lumber camps, wary of leaving their forest home. In Woodenhead it was well known that Kadran Blood-Eye, proprietor of the cat house, was a former member of the tribe. The ruthlessness and cunning of his people were a great asset in his rise to the top of Woodenhead's underworld. Alvaster seriously doubted Kadran, who derived so much of his profits from Kreed's mercenaries, would be of any assistance in his quest. Coco, however, may well have overheard something that could be useful...


Oh nice developments, lots of hooks here...

I have a couple of questions before proceeding:

- Vade mentioned that people were buried in Falcon's Crest, I take it we're just talking about a cemetary here? Does Alvaster known where it is? He's been through there twice - and it's the type of location that he would notice if it was visible from the route he took.

- Alvaser's ability to move about the town - I'm operating under the assumption that he should be okay to move around during daytime so long as he keeps his head down and generally acts like a snivelling wretch, i.e. not equipping armour and magical crowns and generally acting like the cat's nipples. Which is not to say:
*** he might have a poor experience if he bumps into any graycloaks
*** he may be under observation from the town snitches and will need to act discreetly

- Regarding Falcon's Crest - I remember that the gate is guarded during the day, is it locked at night?
Trying to determine whether Alvaster's opportunity is to steal a key, or just go through the gate and look for newly turned earth in the cemetary or other matters of interest (which he doesn't have a huge amount of time for really).


Human Curmudgeon 35

Vade mentioned that people were buried in Falcon's Crest, I take it we're just talking about a cemetary here? Does Alvaster known where it is? He's been through there twice - and it's the type of location that he would notice if it was visible from the route he took.

Alvaster recalls seeing some tombs and gravestones near the lumber HQ

<I'm gonna make a map tonight - will send to michael for confirmation first>

Alvaser's ability to move about the town - I'm operating under the assumption that he should be okay to move around during daytime so long as he keeps his head down and generally acts like a snivelling wretch, i.e. not equipping armour and magical crowns and generally acting like the cat's nipples. Which is not to say:
*** he might have a poor experience if he bumps into any graycloaks
*** he may be under observation from the town snitches and will need to act discreetly

Alvaster's foray into the night was the first time he has left the steamworks since he arrived back in town. Knoggs had been shopping and prepared his meals while Alvaster recovered. Savram has been happy to run errands whilst his father was visiting, you feel that he wouldn't mind fetching things for you in Knoggs' absence.

You feel that you could go out in daytime but that, given your previous abandonment of your duties, if the steamworks were found to be unattended you would be subject to the wrath of Kreed and the grey cloaks. You suspect that since Knoggs has absconded the steamworks will be under observation,if it wasn't already. If you leave it you would need to get back before the grey cloaks get wind of it. Given Potenuse's precaution of the invisibility potion you suspect you may also be watched by night. YOu doubt an infinite supply of invisibility potions will be forthcoming so some creativity may be required if you are to move about at will

Regarding Falcon's Crest - I remember that the gate is guarded during the day, is it locked at night?
Trying to determine whether Alvaster's opportunity is to steal a key, or just go through the gate and look for newly turned earth in the cemetary or other matters of interest (which he doesn't have a huge amount of time for really).

The gate appears to be locked. Given that the greycloaks have left town on their urgent business you assume that the guards drunken state is an indication that he isn't expecting anyone back tonight


Mysterious Jaguar wrote:
You feel that you could go out in daytime but that, given your previous abandonment of your duties, if the steamworks were found to be unattended you would be subject to the wrath of Kreed and the grey cloaks. You suspect that since Knoggs has absconded the steamworks will be under observation,if it wasn't already. If you leave it you would need to get back before the grey cloaks get wind of it. Given Potenuse's precaution of the invisibility potion you suspect you may also be watched by night. YOu doubt an infinite supply of invisibility potions will be forthcoming so some creativity may be required if you are to move about at will

He did go to the shop remember? Anyway I'll go with what you've said and we'll retcon his trip to the shop later...

Alvaster sneaks up to the gatehouse door and nudges it open slowly, peering in, looking for anything of interest. Skullduggery is quite foreign to him, so his heart races and he frets that he has miscounted and will suddenly materialise at the worst moment.

Rolling Stealth check at 1d20 - 1, +20 for invisibility
1d20 + 19 ⇒ (8) + 19 = 27

Rolling Perception to notice anything worthwhile...
1d20 + 4 ⇒ (11) + 4 = 15

Another question - whether Alvaster will realistically be able to get a message to Coco on his way home


Yeah he went and bought the robobones remember, dont be retconning that guff. perhaps he had skulked out some, nobodys so low theys gonna bully up on a dude with a fresh & bloody raw face hole


Zanzibari wrote:
Yeah he went and bought the robobones remember, dont be retconning that guff. perhaps he had skulked out some, nobodys so low theys gonna bully up on a dude with a fresh & bloody raw face hole

On reflection I think I meant "reconcile" it rather than "retcon" it ... I rather imagine Alvaster stumbling through the marketplace, leaning on his cousin's arm, shocked whispers hissing in his wake..

though on reflection you have to wonder whether anyone in town even recognises him, he left to go dungeoneering one day after arrival and has been skulking in the steamworks almost the entire time since returning!

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