We Who Are About To Die... (Inactive)
Game Master Doomed Hero

I'm not sure if I'm supposed to take my turn 4 turn yet or not as it looks like Duroja didn't get her turn 3, but I'll just post this now since no one else's actions will affect what I do.

She had felt the cold before--true cold, walking in a blizzard in nothing but rags. But this, this was something different. Supernatural cold that could freeze the blood in an instant, even the witch's blood. She steeled herself against the arctic blast, frozen in place by it and the blood-curdling scream of the gray beast. She moved slowly and methodically, reaching into her bag to grab the recently-purchased healing potion.

Lorth's mind languidly considered his new-found condition. Lying prostrate before two hideously bulbous frog things his mustache ruined by an application of strange chemicals... and not to mention covered in vomit and bleeding from a freshly opened wound upon his arm. He also considered that other forces were at play here that were likely to impact the combat in a far more tangible manner than he... so he turned turtle.

Curling up into a foetal ball, Lorth presented as little opportunity as possible for further strikes to impact upon the indignity he already felt.

The moment Lorn was finally able to stop vomiting because of all the vomit, the grey creature's cry of triumph made him tremble on his feet. His hesitation costed him dearly as once more a brown froglike creature vomited all over him. In a chain reaction, Lorn vomited himself and nearly fell over since he was now stuck in the goo on the ground.

Cursing through the waves of puke, Lorn managed to raise his dagger to hold off the other froglike creature.

"Bwwaaaaaaaaaaaaah.... CURSED FROGS! Mmmppffbbbwwaaaaaaahh!"

With great effort Lorn stepped backwards, ending up next to Ryujin and tried to slash one of the froglike creatures with his dagger but in his current state he couldn't even hit an elephant if it was sitting in front of him.

Joboo was already shaken from the giants previous bellow and at the horrific sound of the second he did what any little gobbo in his position would do. He peed in his pants...quite thoroughly. IT didnt just trickle out but streamed steadily to mix with the funk already pooled under his clawed feet...awwsa..makes mesa homesick...mesa wanna go home now!... At this point he would have ran and never looked back except the frog's puke had him held fast! Enfuriated that escape was no longer an option he slashed out wildly with his little blade.

Duroja fumed under the weight of the boat. She tried to free herself, but failed. She felt a small piece of herself start to lose hope, and it enraged her. 'I can reach my shield and grease myself... I will not die like this. Death by Swan Boat!' After finding her motivation, she twisted around so she could push herself out without having to resort to magic.

Karlov sighed. As strong as his grip was, the frog was quite slippery.

"Frog man, you are elusive. But this is fight, there is no time for talk."

Karlov swung at the frog with quite a bit of force. He then attempted to leap away from the frog, in hopes of avoiding retaliation.

The madness continued.

A storm of ice raged against the wall, blocking the siege cannon's line of sight. It fired anyway on the same trajectory. The creatures held in the gooey splatter suddenly lit up in glowing light. They shrieked and croaked, blinded by the sudden brightness clinging to them. The Black one managed to yank itself free of the goo and duck into a shop for cover.

As The Muscle Wizard laughingly broke a frog's neck and then tore it's head off, the scorpion-tiger continued to savage the heavyset frog man beneath it.

Ryujin was a flurry of deadly blades and chains, leaving one slain and one grounded before they could even reach him. He was about to bring his weapons to bear when he watched the fire surge and consume his foe. He was lucky to find himself standing in one of the few areas not covered in the disgusting slime. It was still uncomfortably close, but he was in no danger.

Lorn was not so lucky.

The fire spread like it was possessed rushing over the slime and quickly setting the wreckage of carts and kiosks and a few poor trapped civilians alight. The brown frog-things seemed to be unfortunately evolved, and seemed quite surprised when the flames hungrily spread across the trail they had left and swept up their bodies causing them to burst and vanish. Lorth suddenly found himself free of his attacker's claws, but the fire was drawing very near. The few remaining hopping brown creatures seemed to figure out the danger they were in and began to cluster into the shops set into the wall, ignoring Joboo entirely. They did not seem bright enough to realize that they were continuing to spread a trail behind them. In fact, in thier panic, they seemed to be spewing more slime.

The combination of the fearful beast's bellow, the chaos of the surroundings and the rapidly spreading fire was proving to be more than the new Academy students could readily handle. They were shaken up, scattered. Things seemed to be spiraling quickly out of control.

Then suddenly the balance of power shifted.

The five shimmering points near Ryujin expanded quickly into outlines of people. Heavily armed and armored people wearing black tabbards with a white symbol of a padlock on the chest. The largest one immediately charged the grey beast, getting larger as he did so and bringing a massive hammer into the monster's flank. Two behind floated in the air nearly ten feet off the ground and fired rays from armored hands, striking the creature with powerful magic to weaken and bind it. The fourth, a dwarf by his stature, fired a massive crossbow into the thing's leg, anchoring a chain to it as it roared in pain. The strange arbalest was clearly animated and anchored itself firmly to the ground. The last member of the group simply spoke.

"You have trespassed on lands protected by the Treaty of Arch. Lay down your weapons and surrender yourselves. This is your only warning. Failure to comply will be met with overwhelming force."

As reinforcements came, Ryujin saw a black frog turn himself into looking like a human. Surprised at that event, he yelled out while pointing at the man, "He is one of the black frog guys, don't let him escape!" Too late, the fire crept up on him right as he moved toward the imposter.

Eyes wide open with shock, Lorn finally realized he was way in over his head. Literally too he thought with even greater shock as he saw flames racing over the goo, the same goo that he was covered in.

"Cursed frogs and their cursed slime. Frogkind should hope I won't make it out of this fight for I'll eat froglegs for the rest of my day if I do make it out alive." he said to no one in particular.

Lorn even surprised himself as he jumped backwards, his hand grabbing a big anchor Anchor? and swinging around it to land away from the goo and the racing flames.

From the corner of his eye he saw one of the frogmen, a black one, hide and transform into a human, but Lorn didn't care much. Ryujin also seemed to have noticed and was already alarming the entire street. Pfff Mr. goody shoes he thought with disdaid as he tried to escape the burning goo and move away from the monk who was wreaking havoc on his opponent.

Lorn's feet were still covered in mud so walking went slowly but he managed to stay clear of the fire and he managed to move away from the newly arrived people. More guards? he wondered as he grinned at the brown frogmen in front of him.. Not so though now, are you?

The witch shivered, a sensation she hadn't felt in quite some time. As her teeth chattered she bit the cork off the potion bottle, then downed the liquid. Instantly she could feel the warmth flow through her veins, thawing the cold to her usual chill. Melashara then took care as she tread on the treacherous, icy path, trying to maneuver herself away from the Slaad.

The goblin lashed out at the frog creature but wasnt focused enough to score a hit and almost dropped the blade. He was more interested in getting away from the fire. Joboo was still more scared than he'd ever been. Even more scared than that time Thakmaka had found him having squishy, squishy time with his sister...wesa musta runs away!... he deftly sidestepped the things vomit attack and skirted his way around the fire towards where he'd seen the other small teamate fall.

Still encumbered by the assault of vomitous excreta Lorth noticed a lack of foes nearby and struggled to his feet. Attempting to move away from the fire his weighted limbs but barely responded to his exhortations.

The Orc was tired of being harassed by the whip, and stopped running, the threat of the frog creatures already fading from his short attention span. He turned to face the whip, and slashed at it again, trying to eliminate the nuisance.

Duroja pulled herself over the side of the boat from which she had just freed herself, and scrambled to the top as fast as she could. Focusing her frustration into frog-flaying fantasies she felt the mad grin burn in her cheeks, and ecstatic shivers of anticipation. 'First time gutting a frog... I hope enough of the locals have fled or fallen to get a clean shot...'

"So then what happened?" Darian asked.

"Well sir," the leader of the heavily armored respose team said, "The fire spread. The slaad grunts died in the fire and your students were hard pressed but managed to keep free of the worst of it. My squad managed to anchor the Grey and bind it. The wall defenses defeated all but the White, who managed to escape back throguh the gateway. We thought it was over, but one of your students was trying to get throguh the fire and give chase. It turned out the Black had shapeshifted and was attempting to pose as a citizen caught in the chaos. We now have that one bound as well."

"So two command-level bindings, and somewhere around thirty banishments. I'd call that a good tally." Darian said, sounding impressed. "What was the time?"

The man in the armor looked chagrined. "Thirty seconds."

Darian shook his head. "What kept you?"

"The instability field." The armored man said with an annoyed look on his face. "The gatecrashers couldn't even get us close enough. We were luck they Grey had come towards our drop point, otherwise we'd have had to traverse nearly a hundred feet through that mess. You saw it. It would have delayed us for at least another ten seconds. Maybe more."

"That's dangerously close to a failure condition." Darian said gravely.

"Yes, sir. We're aware." The armored man said, standing taller, taking responsibility for what was obviously a significant issue. "Honestly, if it hadn't been for your students the grunts probably would have spread a lot farther."

"The Slaad aren't the strongest trouble we have, but they are often the trickiest. All in all I'd call that a successful response test."

"Yes, sir."

The armored squad made their way back down the street through the rubble.

The clean-up crew was extremely efficient. Healers arrived to tend to the wounded. Nomad Psions and Portationists removed the unfortunate dead along with the massive boat and the handful of anchors. Transmuters and Shapers quickly reassembled the various carts and kiosks. Assessors were speaking with vendors about what goods had been damaged or lost. A cart with the name Chimera across the side released dozens of tiny three-tentacled creatures into the street. The were ravenous little things, and apparently ate filth. Within an hour everything was spotless. A simple tune on a pair of pipes had them scurrying back to their keeper.

The tired gladiators-turned-students stood nearby watching and listening to the Jury Sergeant give his report to the Headmaster, who'd come to retrieve his new charges.

Darian made his way back to them with an amused grin on his face and a sizable sack over his shoulder.

"Just can't seem to keep out of trouble, can you?" He laughed as a a cleric poured healing energies over the group of them.

"It seems to have a way of finding us. Interesting first day."

Lorth is not amused... despite the relatively calm facade that he projected, his honor and sense of common decency was affronted most deeply. Still slicking the remains of vomit from almost every fold of his clothing and brought almost to tears each time his thoughts wander even near to the irrepairable damage done to his mustache - not even tea could have assuaged his pain.

Settling a still courteous but flat and emotionless gaze upon Darian he speaks "To whom must I direct my demands for recompense. They have affronted my honor and the debt must be repaid."

Darian looks at Lorth with concern and confusion. "Recompense? You could use a bath for sure, but it doesn't look like you lost a limb or anything. They're Slaad. Agents of chaos. I don't know if they'd agree to an honor dual."

"Through their actions alone my hair has been destroyed... I would see one of them at least flayed for the imposition."

"Oh. Well, we managed to capture the Grey and the Black. Trials tend to be quick around here. I'll try to keep you posted about it. Maybe I can get you in to watch the sentencing. To be fair though, I've seen a lot of things but I've never seen a glass mustache. Pretty unique."

"That happen a lot in market? Seem like it bad for business."

Joboo missed most of the conversation as he was frantically trying to catch one of the three tentacled creatures to keep...or eats...mesa not make up mnd yets...

Joboo, what are you trying to catch it with? Give me a couple touch attacks

"Gwrr, around here strange things happen a few times a day. Usually they aren't too dangerous, but there's portals on this street that open straight to the Abyss. Every shopper and merchant knows the risks. They stay because it's worth it to them."

Putting the bag on the ground he smiles.

"Speaking of which, part of Arch Law is a certain flexible "spoils clause" that applies to Citizens and Sponsored Immigrants. Being Academy students, you all count. The appraisers set aside unclaimed goods as spoils, and the Jury squad that responded encouraged the merchants not to claim everything they could have as a bit of a thank you. Since gifts are taxable, but spoils arent, they were generous.

The bag was full of smaller bags which Darian began tossing out to the new students.

"Not sure what's in them, but they should be labeled."

Gwrrr'rrr hears a lot of words he doesn't understand, other than that the bags contain 'spoils', which sounds like rotting food, which he's eaten enough times in his life.

As he opens the bag, he is momentarily unhappy that it actually doesn't seem to contain spoiled food as he thought, but then he realizes the items are probably worth more, and he can buy all the spoiled food he can stuff in his face.

The witch looked through her bag and gave a slight nod of appreciation to Darian.

Perhaps this lot is worthy of my time, after all. They acquitted themselves well in the face of chaos...

With a mood at least as bad as Lorth's, Lorn is wearing one of his ugliest scowls. Not saying much and generally just looking around like an angry giant toad, he accepts the bag and stuffs it in his coat without acknowledging any words being said by Darian or anyone else for that matter.

Except for the word "bath", that worsened the mad look in his eyes a bit, probably because he was in dire need of one.

Joboo hopped about trying to catch the little tentacle creatures with his grimy hands.

Successful or not he didnt hesitate to rush over when the Darian mentioned 'spoils'. As a long time raider he knew exactly what that meant and was determined to get his share. He grabbed the bag but would until later when he was alone to see what was inside of it.

Ryujin opens his bag and takes inventory. Appreciative of anything to help him in the future Ryujin goes and meditates to review the battle in his head and correct the mistakes he made This time I was a little better as I will again the next

Duroja felt uncomfortable with the praise she shared, and even more so with the gift. 'I have not earned this, but to protest would be petty I suppose' She opened the bag and peered at the token. She smiled at the irony after determining the small trinket was the very thing to nearly "defeat" her in battle.

Joboo grabbed one of the squirming creatures with a toothy grin. It struggled but had no real hope of escaping once the goblin had it.

Darian raised an eyebrow as the goblin ran over to grab a bag, still holding the tiny creature in one hand.

"Decided to keep an Otyutyke, Joboo?"

In case you're curious, Joboo has a Diminutive One of These

A little taken back at being addressed by the...big boss guy...; Joboo hesitated before responding.

Uh...it makes good pet? Or better foods? Looks funny but maybe tasty too.

"Well, I wouldn't eat it, bu there's folks around here that do. They're what we use to keep things clean around here. They tend to eat stuff nothing else will. The Green Tower came up with them about ten years ago, basically a small version of a strange kind of scavenger we ran across somewhere off-city. They altered them to process waste cleanly and cranked up their metabolism so they need to eat all the time."

The gobbo suddenly had very scary thoughts of the thing eating through his pouch and into his green flesh. Most particularly the precious flesh that resided very near to where his pouches hung!

Ooh! Oi! Mesa gonna need pot to keep her in!

He kept a tight grip on the mouthy thing and stroked its head or what he thought was its head.

donts yusa worry little squigly Petunia, mesa gonna feeds you lots and lots.

"That sounds disgusting! You better keep that abomination away from me Joboo.." Lorn says with a sour look on his face.

"I don't know about the rest of you guys, but I'm going to buy some new stuff and then head back for a bath."

Joboo eyed the big man covered in his own vomit and wondered just what he had said that made him think he was the disgusting one...must be little Petunia...

mesa gonna buy gear and head back too.

"Guess that's my cue to get back to work. Thanks for giving me an excuse to take a break." Darian says, turning back toward the gates with a grin.

Still inwardly seething that the offense inflicted upon his person has not been given suitable credence and weight, Lorth accepts his sack of trinkets icily, before turning his back upon Darian without requesting his leave. Perhaps the master did not notice the slight, but Lorth considered it a fair gesture of his malcontent.

He proceeds immediately to the barracks so as to slough the vomit from his body and clothes via a bath heated to scalding, before brewing a pot of tea and taking it to the stables to drink in solitude and the company of his steed.

With a look of disgust Lorn left the first bath he took after the fight with the slaad. There were bits of undefined colour and shape floating around in the hot water.

"THIS WATER IS DISGUSTING!" Lorn yells at no one in particular as he scrapes a thin layer of hardened yellowish goo from his cheek.

"What do you mean I should have rinsed myself with water from a bucket first? That's COLD water!" he replies to some chump while he gags when he discovers there's chunks of solified green muck stuck in his nostrils.

"I should have gone back to the arena, at least it's clean!" he adds after removing what looks like a flock of slaadskin from between his toes.

The rest of the days Lorn spent contemplating while shaving anyone around needing a shave and polishing his newly gained equipment. He was especially keen on his new leather apron which not only looked a lot sturdier than the previous one but was also of much better quality.

Two days later the new students found themselves in a training hall in the center hub of the academy.

To their surprise it was Big Blue that pushed open the double doors on the other end of the hall and stomped in.

"Yeah, yeah. I pull double duty around here. Before ya ask, this is my primary job. Training gladiators only tends to happen once a year. By now everyone's either washed out, gotten the hang of it, or died, so I need more steady work."

Big Blue looked everyone over and nodded to himself.

"First things first, drop your gear over there. Classes work in increments, like circles. You got to learn to rely on things in the proper sequence. First you rely on yourself, then your allies, then your stuff."

As the students piled their equipment against a wall, he continued.

"The arena already proved you can rely on yourselves. Most of ya ain't so good at relying on others yet, so that's what we're going to concentrate on today."

Walking over to the wall Big Blue tapped a series of symbols on a glass tablet. A circle in the floor opened.

"This is The Pit." he said. "The goal is to get down to the bottom, get the idol from the pedestal, and get back up. This one's open ended. You'll be graded on time, but there's technically no limit. The only rules are no equipment..."

he presses a final button and something subtle happens in the room, like it suddenly became pressurized.

"...and no magic."

"All have to get up, or only one with idol?"

"I've told ya all I'm gonna tell ya. When you think you're done, put the idol on that mark there and ring the bell next to it. That's when the exercise ends. I can tell ya that you're being judged on a lot of factors though, not just speed." Big Blue laughs. "No pressure, eh?"

"We go then."

The Orc jumps to the bottom, trying to roll when he hits the bottom, but instead stubbing his toe.

Thankful to have an unhindered Magnus at his side at least this time, rather than tethered to an ungodly sled or... shuddering at the thought of the events of the profuse projectile emesis of earlier.

Hearing the words as spoken, Lorth considers them before turning to Gwrrr'rrr to request assistance but finding the orc having already leapt from the lofty perch impetuously. Turning to the others he smiles "He'll take some work to extricate from the bottom... shall we spend a moment to talk this through? Or shall it be tally ho, and blaze for glory despite the consequence?" as he speaks Lorth moves across to Magnus and sees himself to mount his marsupial steed.

After dropping his gear and making double sure that Petunia was secure in her pot; Joboo followed the others to the edge of the pit. He looked down and was a bit surprised that it wasnt deeper. He didnt hesitate to jump gracefully to the bottom.

Acrobatics - 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (12) + 9 = 21

And then heading over to inspect the small hole.

Ryujin will take 10 to climb down 10+7=17

He will examine the hole

perception: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (1) + 7 = 8

If no one sees any reason to wait, he'll enter the hole first(taking 10 again for 17 if climbing is needed)

"The arena already proved you can rely on yourselves. Most of ya ain't so good at relying on others yet, so that's what we're going to concentrate on today."

Lorth turns to Big Blue and shrugs his shoulders in a sign of resignation "It would seem that teamwork will take some time sir" sighing as the group seemingly pays but lip service to their instructions...

Melashara grits her teeth in frustration, and nods in assent to the halfling.

Yes, this was a simple matter of lower Joboo down into the pit and helping him climb back up. Now two of our strongest are down there, and we have to find a way to get them back up quickly.

The witch looks around to see who is left, trying to extend her hair and finding, to her chagrin, that the magic dampeners affect that as well.

You down there, don't touch the idol! Joboo, search it to see if it's trapped first! If you need help, we can lower Lorn down as well.

She motions to Karlov and Lorth, moving midway between them (L4) and standing by Lorn. As she moves, she strips off her robe, revealing her undergarments and immodestly baring her frozen skin to the others.

They didn't take away our clothes, did they? Let's tie our clothes, belts, whatever we have together to form a rope. We can secure them around Magnus and have Karlov stand in front of him. Their combined strength should be more than enough to brace our makeshift rope. Lower down Lorn, have him and Joboo search for any traps, and get everyone up here quickly and safely.

She looks to Duroja for support as the men stand, shocked.

C'mon people, we're being timed! Let's move!

Edited to change everything to present tense