GM Kite |
You wake up in a dark room on a rickety bed. Light peaks in through the curtains. Soon, you realize, this isn't your room. Looking around, it's clear that this isn't even a room of the century you're from. You have no idea how you got here, or where the hell you annoying roommate Steve is.
There is no technology, no clock. Standing up, green letters surprise you, appearing in front of your face.
Welcome to Golarion. Please Insert Username. It says, then gives you a keyboard to type into.
Finished typing, a large bag of equipment falls to your feet.
GM Kite |
You find an empty booth, many others around you deciding to drown their problems rather than deal with them directly.
In particular, one young man with long dark hair and a black coat, who sits immediately beside you.
Dude, you new here? He asked, gesturing to the barmaid, an empty-eyed girl with plunging cleavage. Chick's an NPC. He said. Not a real person, but some people don't mind, y'know. Nice to look ar, right? He orders his drink, gin and tonic, then offers to order yours.
Iz Tracer |
The moment the weird looking, funny hair dude offered tracer a drink he told the barmaid i´ll have the most expensive drink you have and bring me two of them. so tracer faced this guy and said dude thank so much, nobody has done that for me, or so I think. What´s your name? And wait did you say NPC??
GM Kite |
The man blinked. Well there goes that my last bounty's pay. He muttered to himself as he shelled out the gold coins, dropping six in total.
NPC, bro. He said. Like video games, y'know. Non-player-character. They ain't human... I mean, some of us ain't human either, but we were. They're just computer programs. He smiled. You're confused, I know. Let's see... How can I best explain this. Put your fist out, then open it. That's the pause menu, 'cept with no pausin'. Your level, two, now, I bet. Your inventory, HP, sh!t like that. He nodded. That's right f!cker, yer in a game now.
Before you can respond, the barmaid comes back with two large mugs of a green glowing drink. It appears to be fizzing. Dragonpiss for the two gentlemen. She said before leaving.
Iz Tracer |
Looking at the mug with depression, thinking to himself "this can't be true, this b@$+~ must be lying." So he picks the mug and started to drink. S~%* THAT IS ACTUALLY DRAGON PISS. Don't drink that. he quickly looks at the npc whore and says B#%++ whats wrong with you!?!? I could of died woman! Do you know who i am?? Im like a god where i come from. You do that s*~$ again and ill b&@%* slap you. tracer grabs the other drink and spils it all over the floor. As excited he was to be in a video game, he contained it all to look cool. so what do you do to get paid here. he said in a chilled voice. oh and sorry didn't catch your name, what was it?
GM Kite |
The man watches Tracer with a note of amusement, wiping the spill of his drink with his fingers, sniffing the, then licking them. His eyes widened, he shuddered, and he swallowed slowly. Urgh... Spicy. He said.
You kill things, mostly. The man said. Usually monsters and other NPCs. Then you loot their cold lifeless corpses and sell their sh!t at the nearest vendors. It's awesome. 'Course, they made it so that you can't kill other PCs. That makes it that everyone can see that you're alignment is evil, yknow. Other than that, some NPCs give you missions, pay for 'em. I'ma bounty hunter, so it comes naturally to me. Also, you gotta not spend money on drinks ya don't drink.
My name? He asked. Kain. Jimmy Kain at yer service. How 'bout you, bro?
Iz Tracer |
Well its not my problem that this b+@@+ tried to poison us man. You should thank me that I saved you life! He was thinking man i'm really in a video game, he couldn't belive this. With to much excitment to hold he blurded teach me how to use my gear! coughing to make it less awkard oh and here let me add you to my friend list. trying to figure out how the f# you use this. who made this s~%%ty pause menu. angry he couldn't get it. Btw names tracer. Tracer...... he was trying as hard as he could to remember his last name, but he couldn't.
GM Kite |
Jimmy gave Tracer a long look, something about the language he used made Jimmy think Ah, must be another frat boy.
Jimmy raises his own pause menu, then adds Iz to his friend list. There we go. He said. We have now formed a party, bro. He gets up off his seat and nods you over. Alright, let's go outside, the NPCs and candy-ass newbs don't like it when you draw weapons in front of them.
Outside, you see a city seperated by a river and multiple bridges. Dozens of NPCs and a few PCs walking outside.
Alright, so the thing is, you don't really have to carry your inventory, y'know. You can summon it by opening up the quick menu. Same as the normal menu, 'cept you have to go into a fighting stance, like...
Jimmy opened the menu again, put two hands out like he was holding a sword, and in a quick flash of light, a katana taller than he was appeared in his hand.
Before I found this baby in the inventory of a bandit I wasted, I just had a regular ol' short sword. Comes with that Bounty Hunter class, along with a few thrown weapons. What class'r you by the way?
Iz Tracer |
OMG thats so cool..... I´m taking about you fighting the bandits. The Katana just looks like it was used to much as he was thinking a dirty joke about the katana being used to much. so would you show me the way to a dungeon or are you too pussy to go right away to a dungeon looking at Jimmy knowing it was probably a mistake to go on a dungeon but, he trusted Jimmy would carry his ass and it would level him up faster than killing useless s++@ in this area.
sorry that took so long, i have been studing a lot
Iz Tracer |
are you asking me of what I think???? as he didnt know what to think about it. Trying to think how he felt he thought "wow i actually never think" welp you know what they say, two is better then three or so i think. scratching his head thinking "yeap that totally how it goes"
GM Kite |
I dunno... With the right company, three is pretty great, y'know. Jimmy gave him a Iz smile. I'll lead ya there. It's three day's trek from here. Hopefully you like sleeping on grass cuz I could only afford one sleeping bag... Unless you wanna share, y'know.
He looks to the bar. I'll be back. He said, going in and coming back out in a matter of two minutes. Ready to get our asses on the road, bud?
GM Kite |
As you walk to the gate, one of the NPC guards hands you a pamphlet.
Reading it, it says;
How to survive most of your limbs intact in three easy steps.
1.Travel with a party.
It will be easier to come back home with your life if you travel with a party, not only making facing large groups of monsters less likely to result in dismemberment, but they can guard your unconscious body when your HP hits zero.
2. Don't approach monsters.
The owlbear may look cute and fuzzy, but you look like a tasty snack.
3. Heal.
Even if the healing potions taste like you're drinking sugar and vinegar, they will keep you alive. Please note that they work best if you do not vomit them.
Neat, huh? Jimmy asked. Got one of those, too. Fun fact, they sell for one Copper Piece. Ten of those, you get a silver, ten of those, you get a gold. One gold, and you can almost buy a pointy wooden stick.
Iz Tracer |
So this game has any rules that I should know about? damn do we really need this party to survive? Jimmy looks like he can carry me to level up until I am strong enough so we can take bosses and be the best in this game. wait if i´m a mindblade do i still need to buy a weapon or could i just choose any weapond i want?
GM Kite |
Jimmy pulls out his pause menu and says, out loud. Mind Blade.
Then he reads. Any weapon you want, you just have to imagine it. Later levels, you get two. It also warns that, whatever you conjure, it's still an energy weapon, and it will hurt if you stick it in yours or anyone elses bodies, even for fun. He said, humming. Well that's a crying shame. He smiled.
He leads you out the gate. There's a wide-open field with an endless criss-crossing maze of rivers laid out in front of you.
Jimmy whistles. Pretty, ain't it. Ya go swimming, keep in mind the killer frogs. They don't like skinny-dippers.
Iz Tracer |
So what´s the stoy of this game? how did we end up here? is there a way to leave? he asked jimmy thinking he has been here by looking at his face and how dirtyish he was, tracer could know he has been here about 2-3 weeks in this game so he knows the information in this game.
GM Kite |
Aw, you think MMOs have an actual story. Jimmy said. You must be new here. Oh... You mean the story behind it. I dunno. Just woke up here. Y'ever watch Sword Art? Like that, I guess. But not. We weren't even given a mission like reach the top of the tower and kill the boss or anything. We're just sorta... Here. Weird sh!t, huh? Don't know what happens when we die here, though. Frankly, I ain't gonna risk it, cuz getting stabbed here hurts like getting stabbed IRL, only here you can drink a potion and heal yourself, y'know.
He laughed. But don't worry. As long as you stick with me, you'll be fine.
Let's see if you can learn to roll dice. Roll a Perception check.
GM Kite |
We'll save that enthusiasm for when we get to the big city, kid. Jimmy said. We can be a tag-team, charge twice the rate.
As he said that, you do not notice until it is too late a large, looming shadow from behind.
... Oh... Sh!t...
Jimmy Init: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (14) + 4 = 18
Iz Init: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (7) + 4 = 11
? Init: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10
Jimmy goes first, then you, then the monster.
Jimmy swiftly turns, his oversized sword quickly materializing in his hand, his eyes widening.
Dafuq is that?! He says, refering to the large, half-bear, half-owl with a hungry look in it's eyes.
Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (20) + 3 = 23
Critical hit?: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (19) + 3 = 22
Damage: 1d10 + 2 ⇒ (9) + 2 = 11
Hells yeah! 22 DMG.
With two hands, Jimmy slashes down the beast and hits it straight into the shoulder and down the chest, pixels bleeding from the wounds and disappearing into the air, the number 22! Flying above where the strike met.
Critical Baby! Jimmy shouted. C'mon, Iz, we'll share the EXP!
Iz Tracer |
still really noob at this, I... wait do you mean like right know? because I..... I... welp can find any excuse so what the hell.
Attack: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (15) + 3 = 18
Critical hit?: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (14) + 3 = 17
Iz goes in with NO style at all but tries to go for the weird looking thing and looking at the monster in the eye wit no fear, Iz goes with his mighty battleaxe slashing it near his rib cage.
not sure if i did it right but i am a nub
GM Kite |
Not a critical hit. That's if you roll a nineteen or a twenty.
Damage: 1d8 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4
The energy ax cuts the ribs of the beast, not deep, but leaving a long red mark. The number 5 floats up where you struck.
Sweet, bro! Jimmy said. You're first attack was a hit!
The beast raises up one clawed arm at you, then swings.
Attack: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (6) + 8 = 14
Damage: 1d6 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10
It misses by a few inches, you can feel the rush of wind as it swings, but nothing else.
I remember when I had my first miss. Jimmy said. I pissed my pants.
The beast raises it's claw for another strike.
Then you hear something behind the beast. The number 7 raises above it's head, then the owlbear falls.
Behind it, a slim figure in a black-and-blue hood weilding a staff looks down on it. A large number appears in front of each of you. Your Exp.
No fair! He said. That was our kill.
Yes. The figure said, a woman's voice. It is our kill... Now.
A-a... A girl. Jimmy says quietly, then turns to you. I can't tell with the hood. Is she hot?
I heard that!
Iz Tracer |
is she a girl i thought he was guy... I mean a girls? no i don´t i thought you were a dude you slut, why the f%$+ would you steal MY kill!! iz angry at this so what called girl thinking who does she think she is. its not like she is hot take off your hood so i can remeber the face of my nemesis you b%%$&. whispering to jimmy what should we do with her?
GM Kite |
The woman gives Iz a death glare.
First of all, you're going to apologise. Right. Now. She said. Or I'm going to hospitalize you.
She takes off the hood, revealing the face of a beautiful young woman with Blue eyes, swirling blue tattoos on her cheeks, and long blonde hair. I'm Robynn, Oracle of the Apocalypse.
Jimmy swallows. That's a cool name. He whispers back to Iz.
Iz Tracer |
wow........................................................................ . iz had nothing to say but to stare at here face and whisper to Jimmy "is she a mermaid"
Iz got back to the point and said i wouldn´t mind going to the hospital if you are the sexy nurse that gets to do fun stuff with me......... WAIT I DIDN´T WANT TO SAY THAT OUTLOUD Iz was so nervous that he quickly covered his face and said sorry
sorry about taking so long
GM Kite |
No problem. Happens all the time.
No. She has very nice legs and everything. Jimmy whispered back.
I heard that! Robynn said to Jimmy. And I heard that, too!
We're very sorry. Jimmy said. Please don't apocalypse us.
Robynn shakes her head and turns around. Whatever. I'm heading to that cave on the bounty board. Seeya.
Jimmy smiled and followed her. Wotta coincidence! We're going there too! We should go together, for safety and stuff.
Damn it. Robynn muttered. Fine, but stop talking.
GM Kite |
Jimmy spits in his hand and gives him the high-five. Let's do this. He said enthusiastically.
In less than an hour's time, you come to the mouth of the cave, dark enough for most humans to barely see.
Luckily, each race has low-light vision :)
There's a skeleton on the entrance. Dwarven by the look of it. Nothing valuable left on it.
Ready? Jimmy asked, swallowing.
When you are. Robynn said slowly.
GM Kite |
Jimmy laughs lightly. Yeah, Robynn, you're scared of a cow? He asked, casually putting his shakey hand on his hip. Whatta n00b.
Then, the stomping gets louder, out from the darkness, a twelve-foot-tall minotaur hefting and ax the size of yourself appears.
Jimmy's face turns pale, Robynn laughs at him.
Well that's a load of bull-
MOOO!!!
Init: 1d20 ⇒ 11