The Rebellion, with Space Duck

Game Master Ace Matthews

"Hm....well we can't waste to much time here, Maybe moving on would be best....Unless someone has some way to deal with small creatures crawling in the walls.." Unfortunatly Alexis does not gave the correct spells to deal with this.

"Ahh yes, let's just dump the acid that we keep just for holes full of strange vermin." Septima says dryly.

"Alexis has a point. We're getting distracted. We should probably leave it be..."

"Fair enough. We have our own hole to get down."

Amara returns to the trap door and descends.

The eye-watering stench of urine and feces fills this large room. Nests made of chewed crates and barrels line the walls, while rusty knives and hooks cover the tabletops. Several large rats lie bludgeoned to death by Amara's improvised deadfall trap.

There is also a door to the west of the room.

Soooo.....I know this is inaccurate but.....I can't help it!!!

"Who the Heck is playing bagpipes? In a basement? Whatever we aren't alone guys."

Alexis, while probably being VERY wrong about the bagpipes bit, does ready her book and get on guard.

Septima puts a hand on Alexis' shoulder.

"Are you quite sure you're alright?"

A room full of rusty things and sharp objects?

Time to search it for treasure! "Bagpipes..? I don't hear anything."

"I also hear no bagpipes, but it seems like you guya have been seeing and hearing things since we got here. There's definitely something weird going on."

She scans the area, looking for anything that could spell danger and then proceeds further in.

Dirty salt and sawdust coat the floor of this gloomy hall. Bits
of the wall masonry have been chewed or clawed away,
revealing narrow, winding animal tunnels beyond. Steel rails
are mounted in the ceiling, with a few lonely iron hooks
dangling from them. A pile of stained pillows and motheaten
blankets lies in a ten-foot-square depression in the
floor to the northwest.

You may want to at least state how the light is being handled, spells or whatever. The upstairs was lit well enough ambiently, but down here it's dark.

Scattering before you are several grotesque, bipedal possum looking things! Time for a fight, they look pissed!

init Alexis: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (7) + 8 = 15
init Amara: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7
init Mira: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (15) + 7 = 22
init Septima: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (17) + 4 = 21

Init Critter 1: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (19) + 1 = 20
Init Critter 2: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 1 = 21
Init Critter 3: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 1 = 21
Init Critter 4: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 1 = 15
Init Critter 5: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

One of them is asleep on the nest. Two were standing guard, and reflexively use their most horrid ability on the opening of the door!

Vomit on Amara and Mira: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (20) + 3 = 23
Vomit on Alexis and Septima: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (11) + 3 = 14
If these hit your touch AC I need a fort save on your turn!
I'll update the map tomorrow.

Fortitude: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5

Well that's a bad time. What's the penalty for failing?

fort: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5

Dirty Dirty little bastards!

Well, my turn isn't for some time, but here goes.

Fortitude: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4

Don't mind me. I'll just be adding to the vomit already on the floor.

... ... ... Wow... RNGesus really has a bone to pick with you guys.

The putrid stank of the vomit is almost more than the party can handle alone. When it flies from the disgusting creatures it splatters all but Septima, who hid behind the door jam. With the stuff literally peppered across your face, you can't help but surrender what's left of your lunch to the ground. Nauseated for 1d4 ⇒ 4 Rounds. I still need to know who has torches or light spells in hand. Mira and Septima are up, but Mira may only take a move action of course :).

I'd forgotten about that. If it was dark at the bottom of the ladder and nobody produced any more efficient lighting methods, Amara would have lit a torch whilst examining the room. If it didn't get sufficiently dark until inside the room we just opened, she is lightless.

Okay Mira. Its lunch is on your face, yours is on the floor, and everything is horrible.

New plan.

She turns around and heads back out the door and towards the trap door.

Because screeeeeeeeew this.

Despite being the sole healthy party member, Septima can't help but feel her stomach attempt to revolt. She follows Mira's plan and rushes for the trap door.

Well if I am up and can only take move actions I will retreat up the ladder as well.

Once the party regains their composure and rinse their mouths out the next ability of their tiny assailants becomes evident. For lack of a better expression, s*#~ gets weird. Hallucinations, haunts, bleeding walls, opening and closing doors and drawers, but it all seems off. like too many spells are in conflict. Not as subtle as Mira had witnessed. A shrieking argument mixed with laughter arises in undercommon from below.

"Guys... I think we're dealing with poltergeists. Or maybe just really, really douchey fey. Either way, Amara this time we're going to have you smash them. And I'm going to, uh... Try to stab them in the vital bits."

"Oh so THAAAAATS Why Mira was going crazy, ahhh that makes sense, why didn't I think of it? Hmmm..." Alexis, cleaning the sick of her chin with a napkin from her bag, nods to herself like all the answers have aligned!....Then she swigs some water in an attempt to clean out the gross taste. She doesn't seem as alarmed as she should be.

It seems to each of you that the others have all grown some odd form of facial hair. Amara seems unphased as she wipes the sick from her fu-man-chu, and Mira's broad handlebar mustache sticks out wider than her face. Septima, fiddling with her hair, seems instead to be stroking a long goatee, looking thoughtfully at Alexis' oddly colored mutton chops.

Just waiting on the reengage. The critters are remaining in their nest area arguing over what pranks to pull. By delaying actions, you can effectively decide the initiative order for yourself rushing back in.

Cool. I was far enough down the initiative list that I was just waiting for you to point at me, but this works.

"...Okay, now you all have facial hair."

Mira just sighs and shakes her head.

"I think I'm done puking. How 'bout the rest of you?"

"I, uh...I think I'm okay. Are those awful bastards just hanging back in that room?"

Amara glances back at the door and leans against the wall, trying to regain her composure.

"We need a plan of attack..."

Alexis seems ENTHRALLED by Mira's CATROONISHLY large mustache. of course when the need for a plan arises she shakes her head into focus and coughs.

Ah! Well if you want I can try and put them all down in one swoop. Have Amara follow me in case things go wrong?"

Basically planning on firing off either color spray or sleep...Whichever is more convenient for the enemy setup. And after looking at the board sleep is looking like the winner here.

"Knocking them out is a good idea. We down half their group, and then Amara and I can follow up to down the rest."

Okay Ima bump this one along

The plan went off without a hitch... seemingly. Only two of the little buggers managed to remain standing after a brilliant spell from Alexis, and they were both too surprised by the renewed vigor of their assailants to stop getting picked and clubbed out of their own miserable existence.

Amara: 1d4 ⇒ 2
Mira: 1d4 ⇒ 3

After a cursory examination of the room, not much is found, save the grubby nest piled with random bits thieved from around town and a locked gate to the south in front of a descending set of stairs.

To avoid confusion, you may interact with or perceptionize either of the spots mentioned or the room in general.

"That... that went far better than expected. Great shot there, Amara. I hope we didn't brain anything too much."

Or so Mira says, moving towards the locked gate to ply her trade.

Disable Device: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (15) + 9 = 24

The gate was very old and rusty, but after some coercing, and the larger of the tools in Mira's kit, it gave way. The hinges protest the sudden freedom with a loud metallic groan that cuts through the damp silence that had previously befallen the room.

"Okay, good news is the door is open. Bad news is anything down there probably knows we're here. Don't suppose you guys found anything, did ya?"

Amara, who had been leaning against the wall next to the gate while Mira worked her magic, scoffs.

"Mira, we kicked in the front door, fought a large deformed dog, dropped a barrel of horseshoes down a trapdoor, and took turns violently puking our guts out. I don't think that creaky gate is the thing that will have given away our presence."

She peers past the gate, looking for any more signs of trouble.

Perception: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (20) + 3 = 23

Way to waste a 20 on the empty corridor, Amara.

"Those could all have been the illusion gremlin things, though. Now whatever's down there knows that we're opening gates and..."

Pause.

"Y'know what, yeah, you're right. We're about as subtle as a punch through the face."

Meanwhile, she peeks at both the pile and the room.

Pile: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (15) + 4 = 19
Room: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (11) + 4 = 15

The depression lined with pillows and blankets is all that remains of an old hatch-and-pulley system the slaughterhouse workers used to raise and lower carcasses for preservation. The grimples have been using it as a bed and treasure vault. Among the blankets is their happy hoard:
12 gp, 185 sp, 342 cp.
A pair of quartz earrings
Nine silver coat buttons
A slightly gnawed cloak-(radiates magic)

"Hey, one of you caster-types. Any of this stuff magic?"

Or so Mira asks while she works on scooping up all the coin and jewelry into a sack.

Amara quietly approaches the others.

"Sounds like we've got two...somethings...down the hall. Sounds like they might be having a hard time breathing. Hopefully it's not more of these things."

She absentmindedly kicks one of the corpses.

Huehuehue: 1d4 ⇒ 2
Also Huehuehue: 1d4 ⇒ 1

Alexis, Convieniently proud and distracted but totally paying attention (and not busy with stuff and forgot to keep up with the game) Looks around, scanning the room for magic.

"Let me seeeeee."

The cloak in Mira's hand is the only thing that catches your eye. It's a soft aura, kindof like a silvery bubble. After thinking for a moment, you decide it must be one of Abjuration. Alexis Spellcraft: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (13) + 8 = 21 Of course, abjuration, and those telltale silvery threads, it's a cloak of Resistance.

" Oho~! I think we have stumbled upon a cloak of resistance! Even chewed up it's quite the piece of work.....who wants it? I suggest out large friend Amara!" Alexis motions towards Amara with a large smile, shaking her hands a bit like a showman.

Honestly, Septima has the weakest saves out of the group (Mira-Total +8, Alexis/Amara-Total +6, Septima-Total +3), so it'd be best mechanically for her to have it. Amara doesn't know that, though.

Amara shrugs as she scratches her neck.

"It's not quite what I'd have hoped for, but you know what they say; "Never kick a horse in the mouth."

She dons the cloak, completely oblivious to the mangling of the proverb.

"We'll see what else we get out of this and figure out who should get what after we get back to base."

Thanks to Amara's great and Totally Accurate saying, Septima snaps out of whatever deep thought that had wrapped her mind up for so long.

"Wait, what? I heard my name." She blinks, glancing between Alexis and Amara.

Either Septima or Mira, tbh. Mira has a high save total, yes, but only +1/+0 for fort/will--she's only any good at reflex. :')

"Couldn't imagine why... don't think they actually used it."

Mira claps a hand on Septima's shoulder, looking down the hallway. "We should get going to stab us some wheezy, annoying monster things or whatever."

I mean, even though Mira's other saves are low, her average is still higher than everyone else's. Mira-2.667, Alexis/Amara-2, Septima-1. Honestly, I don't care who ends up with it. I just don't really want it when my share of the loot could be better put to use sexifying Ramón. ^_^

"Yes."

Amara says, trying to scratch her shoulder blade under her armor.

"Awful, wheezing, itching things. This place better be worth all this, because I'm starting to get pretty pissed off."

Alexis nods.

"Quite.....now then friends, are we friends? Whatever let us go onward!. Alexis smiles wide as she goes.....towards the next entrance since I cannot see the map on account of being in the car lol. Also I just said that in general we can g8ve it to Septima lol

A fifty-foot diameter pool of rancid, brown slurry fills most of this circular chamber, and is the source of the foul stench emanating from the portal. Chunks of plaster have fallen away, leaving ragged patches behind in the walls and ceilings and mounds of rubble on the floor. What wall space remains is decorated in crude drawings and symbols of sinister form. Greasy-looking chains run between four stout pillars rising from the muck and anchor to various points on the wall.

In the disgusting pool you see two man-sized forms wallowing in the muck - man-sized, but certainly not quite man-shaped. Two tumorous-faced masses of flesh with pudgy arms turn as they spy the light breaking the gloom, and begin to advance towards her, their roars echoing over the splashes of the pool's slimy contents.

Init Alexis: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (9) + 8 = 17
Init Amara: 1d20 + 1 - 1 ⇒ (16) + 1 - 1 = 16 so... damn... itchy
Init Mira: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (2) + 7 = 9
Init Septima: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (13) + 4 = 17
init s+!$people: 1d20 ⇒ 16

The creatures begin to advance!

Map is updated, all but Mira may go before the creatures, who are sluggishly wading toward you in the slop.

OH I SEE HOW IT IS, let everyone but the rogue get to move because I can't get higher than a 2. Racism! Classism! Diceism! (Good luck and go team!)

Alexis grimaces at the shapes shambling towards them.

"Yeah okay that's unpleasant, lets try and pick them off."

Alexis is casting Ray of frost

ray of frost: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (13) + 2 = 15

If it hits

Damage: 1d3 + 0 ⇒ (2) + 0 = 2

Amara barely suppresses a gag before wrinkling her nose and bringing Ramón to bear and moving forward to strike at the nearest creature.

I'm assuming that the pool of s$&& is difficult terrain and that the creatures are far enough into the pool that I can't charge. If I'm mistaken, add 2 to my attack and subtract 2 from my AC.

Attack: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (7) + 6 = 13
Damage: 1d8 + 10 ⇒ (4) + 10 = 14

Now that I'm home and can see that the pool is larger than I'd initially thought, I can't get to the creature in a single move, so I'll just move to the edge of the pool and ready an action to put Ramón through the first one to get within swinging range.

It's ankle deep, so not difficult terrain, so your call.