The air surrounding you seems to shimmer and stutter, almost as though the universe has skipped a beat. When your senses return you see the barmaid laying out a peculiar series of shot glasses and their respective bottles on the bar.
"Right, don't tell me I didn't warn ye, but we call this'un takin a 'Trip round the world'." she gestures to the scene laid out. In sequence from the left to right there are seven different sets of shot glasses.
It starts with Taldan brandy, followed by sweet Katapeshi ouzo, Dwarven fire whiskey, Shoanti moonshine from Varisia, Baijiu from Tian, Elvish calvados and the last is Arak from Osirion.
"The last cocky dwarf we had in here went three times round before crashing out in Katapesh, you better that an you and yer mates can drink fer free"
"Cmon Doc, show these folk what us Steel Wolves are made out of!! That last Dwarf has nothing on you!! Doc!! DOC!! DOC!!! "
Doc picks up his first shot and eyeballs the glass with confused distain. "Later someone's gonna have t' tell me the story o' why humans like t' drink from a mess o' thimbles."
Doc takes his time, a slow, steady dwarven pace, never changing or letting up, sucking one down and setting it upside down on the bar, then picking up the next. He always takes a quick breath inward and holds it in his mouth for a few moments before swallowing, occasionally muttering things about the quality of the alcohol.
By the 15th drink he mentions he's tired of that particular flavor and asks to sample a few other vintages of equal or greater potency.
By the 20th shot he's grinning and redder than normal in the cheeks, his usually grumpy demeanor becoming more boisterous and amused, making pyramids and other structures out of his emptied glasses.
By the 25th drink he realizes that the bar has gone from rowdy and excited to rather silent and looks around, slightly bleary-eyed, asking "Wha'sth'madder? Why's e'rrrybody whipsperin'?
When he hits 30, he puts his cup down and says "M'belly's all fullup. Did ah beat th'...beat th'reccerd yet?"
When Doc announces that he's done the bar goes from relatively hushed silence to a bout of cheers and applause. Money changes hands in the outskirts of the scrum of people from bets laid for and against his gambit.
The bar-wench has a wry smile when she addresses the sozzled dwarf "Aye, ye did at that." before placing four silver shot glasses in front of him. "Once for each trip around, and as promised the rest of the nights free fer yer friends."
Doc just nods, putting the glasses inside each other. "Ther so liddle.." he mutters. "Mebbe ah kin pour mah bebbies ther first drinkinum."
He rises methodically, like he's considering something important on the way and turns back to his fellow wolves.
"You fuggers better'a made abuncha money offa that."
Cort smiles at Doc as he counts his pile of coins. "Dunno... how much do you consider a bunch?"
Cort thumbs around a bit, pushing the coins into piles. "Looks like I won each Wolf 12 gold and 4 silver. A nice haul for a drink eh?"
Blaze slaps Doc on the back "Icannotbelieveyoujustdidthatthatwasoneofthemostincrediblethingsihaveeverse enhowareyounotdead??" Clearly the young man's excitement has gotten the better of him.
Sentis had cleaned up as best he could in the rain barrel behind the barracks so he'd be somewhat presentable for the big chiefs tomorrow and took a meal in the common room before retiring to his room. He wondered how much trouble his squadies were getting into but knew they had some steam to let off after all theyd been through in the Sargavan jungle.
Doc blinks at Blaze a few times before saying "Laddie, whaddever langage tha' was, ah sure don' t'ink ah speakit. Where th'hell's tha' musician? It's drinkin' song o'clock. Wensh! Ale! R'member lads, a'ways wash down yer booze wit' good beer. Keeps th' blearys a'way."
The next morning, the squad is called before their superiors. Those that spent the night drinking are a bit worse for wear, though hardened soldiers that they are they manage to hide most of it behind a stern disposition.
One of the barrack guard brings you to the Captain's office, though he is currently with someone inside. The squad has a short wait to endure out the front of the office.
They seem to be discussing both the mission itself and the issue of recompense.
"No such thing as a free drink Ima payin fer it now."
Perception
"That does happen Grusk." Kaavel says as he looks around at the squad members who went out to see if they are feeling the same as Grusk.
Sentis shakes his head at the stories of the previous nights events and was a little disappointed that he had missed out on them.
Despite the bloodshot eyes you all dont look too bad. Doc actually looks better this morning than Ive ever seen him look...and thats saying something.
He smiles and chuckles at his joke and tries to listen in on whats happening in the other room...
Perception -
...but is too distracted by the squads antics to notice anything
Darkbiter just shakes his head when he hears about the antics. "Just try not to do that after you've pissed somebody off. Never know who has a dagger they're willing to use." Darkbiter chuckles at the state of his fellow half orc.
"You flirtin' wit' me, Elf?" Doc says past his cigar. "Jus' cause ah'm th' prettiest Wolf by leaps an' bounds don' mean ah 'priciate ye eyeballin' me."
Looking around at the rest of the squad he just grunts. "All'a ye got the blearys? Shoulda drank more beer, like ah told'ja."
Blaze only had a mug and a half at the bar. As he explained to his squadies "Its really hard to ride a horse or camel drunk". Thus the next morning he was not nearly as bad off as his teammates who also went drinking.
He waits with his friends, sitting crosslegged on the ground in quiet meditation with his blade.
Sentis didnt have the wits to match banter with the clever dwarf and wasnt able to even think about a come back as he was laughing at the idea of a 'pretty dwarf'.
"Nay Doc an more tha a score o times I has been called tha pretty one!"
"Had we all tha constitution tah drink so much mayhap we would be in agreement wit yer assessment!"
After a few minutes of waiting, the door before you is opened and you are ushered into a small room with a single chair and desk. Both Cpl Valorious (still looking worse for wear) and Vankerman are present - as is the Captain of your mercenary company locally. The Captain is a rakishly thin Chelish man who moves with the grace of a man who has spent his life soldiering. You know him as Captain Helthin, and he has not graced you with his first name.
After you enter, Vankerman nods a greeting before departing out the door you came in.
Addressing the squad, the Captain starts "Right, I've heard from the Corporal and Mr Vankerman as to what happened on your last job. Sounds a right nasty business, but in fairness I'd like to hear from you lot as well - seeing as how the Corporal was laid out for the last half. So enlighten me..."
Kaavel looks at Captain Helthin than says "First there was some animals that attacked on our first night out. Next there was some flies that put their spawn into some of us. Than there was some monkeys and two apes that felt the need to attack us. At some point some of the squad noticed a masked man watching us. Along the way we helped some lizardmen kill boggard so we could go through their land to get to the ruins. Once at the ruins there was a swam of bugs and two undead warriors. We get through all that to find the porters cursed/mind control by the masked man which Doc and Blaze felt the need to have a nice chat with. Now here we are." Turning to the rest of the squad he says "Did I miss anything?"
Cort nods to Kaavel. "That is roughly correct. Within the ruins was a wealth of items of significant archaeological import. Vankerman should be pleased." Cort's voice drops from his usual fun attitude into a formal courtly, clipped tone in the presence of a superior he actually respects. "Some items have been claimed by the squad as per paragraph three page 17 of the Blood Hawk's Treatise. Corporal Valorious was hurt and is, I fear, unable to continue combat within any reasonable amount of time. In his absence, I recommend Private Memluk Seljuk be promoted to the rank of Corporal and put in charge of the unit, at least until such time as Valorious is able to return to battle. Private Seljuk showed great initiative and leadership when leading us out of the jungle and during the raid of the ruins." Cort stands at attention, awaiting the Captain's answers.
"I admits myself not being prepared fer battle again them I does not wish to kill an have purchased a sap fer jus such future occassions, I suggest everyone gets one."
"Tha story was right far as I ken tell, though yah left out docs conquest in tha bar!"
"I was not there to see that Grusk. You can tell him though."
The Kelesshite nods his thanks to Cortland, then adds "While what both say is true, this was definitely a mission that was only successful due to the Steel Wolves acting together. Each member of the squad was instrumental in the overall success of the mission. While the decision of who shall lead this squad is out of my hands, I would be remiss as not just a member of this unit, but a proud Qadiran solider, and friend of my fellow Wolves, to point out that each of these men deserve at least some form of recognition for their key roles in getting all of us out that jungle in one piece, with both our current employer and our Corporal alive, as well as a sizable haul of treasure"
"Aside from the ruins themselves, which were a challenge, but nothing we couldn't handle, especially with Doc's superb trap making skills, I don't think we can offer much that Mr. Vankerman can't, other than the fact that the strange shaman had turned our guide into a strange beast just before we took them both out in short order." Darkbiter shares his thoughts with the captain.
"Doc ken talls tha story better I though tha first drink was gonna burn off his beard an melt his eyeballs; tha second one I though fire was gonna shoot outta his mouth and tha third one I thought lightning was gonna come outta his arse, yah shoulda heard his bowels movin!"
"Wha' story?" Doc says, honestly confused. "We jus' wen' out fer some post-mission drinkin'. Th' bar's still there. No damage. Dinnae even git kicked out. Ah even won a few o' those funny human drinkin' thimbles," he says pulling out a newly polished silver shot glass. "don' s'pose ye wan' one, Cap'n?"
After hearing the calvalcade of stories flowing forth from the squad, the Captain just raises his hand and waits for quiet.
Once obtained he responds "I was more interested in the fact that you went out with twenty porters and only six made it back alive. The money has taken that out of our pockets, and by extension yours..."
Letting that sink in a few moments with a stern face before cracking a smile "Luckily enough for you the haul you brought in was more than enough to cover it handsomely. After taking out the cost of the Mwangis and the company's cut, here's a writ for your portion." signing off on a piece of paper and handing it to Blaze.
"The rest of you can go, but I have words for Seljuk's ears alone."
Darkbiter mutters under his breathe once he's outside the office, "He should count himself lucky to walk out with 6 of the porters, the fool."
Also once outside
"I didn't hire any porters, seems tha is an excuse tah takes money outa mah pocket. Not mah fault tha man brought 100 pounds of shit-paper intah tha woods stead o usin a big leaf!"
"An another ting was no reason fer him tah even be there all we had tah do was find it an haul out tha goods!"
Sentis had what he considered wisely kept his mouth shut during the meeting in the small room. A room made all the smaller due to the captains imposing presence. He had no desire for that mans regard. At this point anyways.
Lucky indeed Dark. Maybe we shouldve brought up that he had considered selling them into slavery. I, for one am glad to be done with him.
"I'm not one to hand out promotions lightly, and I don't think you're salty enough yet to write it in the book." laying one hand on the company charter. "We'll give you a field trial as soon as another job comes through for a single squad. You do alright, we'll make it official... you feck it up and you'll be digging latrines. That good with you?"
Blaze nods his agreement and smiles his thanks "Not a problem, Sir. By your leave?" He stands, tucking the writ into a pocket, slautes and waits to be given permission to leave.
As you leave, Corporal Valorious remains.
As the group files out, Doc stands his ground for a moment. "Whoh, Cap'n. No disr'spect intended, but ah'm confused 'bout somethin'. Ah'm pretty good at contracts an' tha' sort'a thing. Ah don' remember anythin' in the mission parameters tha' involved protectin' the' porters. We were supposed t' deal with the ruins an' mess up anyone who tried t' stop us. When those porters got mind-controlled by tha' shamn fella, they fell int' th' category of "mission obstruction". We tried t' save as many o' them as we could, but we certainly weren't contractually obligated to. Because th' porters weren't specified in the contract as needin' protectin', that means there wasn't even a conflict of interest in the mission parameters. Saving th' ones we could was actually above and beyond our duties. Why're we bein' docked pay fer that?"
In a book-keeping tone the Captain responds "The job was to safeguard the man and his possessions to the target, retrieve the contents and safeguard his possessions back out." pausing a moment to look up and lock eyes with Doc "Like it or not Vankerman owned the twenty Mwangi you went in with, so has claimed recompense under the terms of his arrangement with the Blood Hawk company."
"The company has no qualms with how you conducted yourself, and again like it or not black meat is cheap in Sargava."
"With all due respect, it may be cheap, but it is still unwise to take that much of that kind of property without giving them at least basic tools for self defense. The jungle cares not about one's legal status, simply one's ability to survive, which common slaves are rarely prepared for."
Blaze chimes in at this point "While I understand the points the two of you raise, I doubt attempting to argue the matter will get us anywhere. We have been paid, quite handsomely I might add, and that's that. Let's head back to the barracks, and I'll share with you our payment."
Kaavel looks at Blaze when he speaks "Let us be off than. I really wish to see what our pay is. I had some thoughts on equipment I could of used when we were out on our mission. I was thinking of some weapons to cover my fist to deal more damage what do you all think?"
Darkbiter is perfectly content to leave Vankerman to his foolish ways, quietly hoping that the next time he tries a stunt like that, the jungle swallows the fool whole. "I suppose a equipment upgrade would be helpful, if we are going to be asked to be stronger than the jungle itself."
We got paid? How much? I could definitely use better equipment. Do we have another mission coming up that we'll need particular gear for?
"At least we ere not out any coin last night fer drinks."
Blaze makes his way back to the barracks and once in the room(s) set aside for the him and his fellow Wolves, locks the door after the whole squad is inside and produces the writ with a dramatic flourish. "As I said gents, we were paid quite handsomely for that little jaunt into the ruins. Ten thousand gold more than makes up for the annoyances of the porters, though not Vankerman's stupidity."
"At least Vankerman proved the old saying about a fool and his money, both in buying that many porters and not even giving them spears and in our pay."
"Wha do we know bout our R&R or our next missions?"
"Understood, Cap'n." Doc says on his way out, "Slavery ain't a Dwarven thing, so ah f'rgot th' porters count'd as property. Strange business, that."
Leaving one of the silver shot glasses on a side table, Doc catches up with the rest of the squad. "Ah wan' t' take a look at th' gear we havn't identified yet, an' crack those locks. Ah'm taking potion orders too. Who wants what?"